RISE

The Devil Wins This Around Against Food Lion ‘Kung Fu Grandpa’

By Elizabeth C.

IT’S GOOD FRIDAY, TIME FOR A JESUS-LOVING GRANDPA TO CHASE AWAY THE DEVIL WITH SOME KUNG FU NUMBCHUCK PANDA MOVES.

Let’s listen in as the Rev. Aamon R. Miller delivers a siloquoy on the performance in a local Food Lion parking lot:

“Get it my man, he out here doing it. Yeah, that’s right, I’m 58 — 63 years old.
Out here on the side of my pickup truck in Food Lion. And I’ll whip a fool upside his head.
I’m out here practicing, getting ready for Easter Sunday.
Jesus gonna rise up, I’m a whup the devil right out here in the parking lot
Pickup truck. Radio playing. Sunglasses. Ain’t no sun. It’s cloudy. Overcast.
But I’m out here. With my gloves. And my numbchucks.
One man, one Lord, one faith, one baptism. Two numbchucks. Up in the air like Mary Lou Retton.
Pow, behind the back. Bust your finger, that hurt. Uh-huh, yep, yep.
Shake it off homey, shake it off, shake it off. Yep, tore that finger up. Yeah buddy, time to call it quits.
Looks like the devil won this round, folks.
Gone have to get back in the car, get me a band-aid.
Shake it off. Shake it off.”

Thank you Reverend for this fantastic poetry with motion.

Via Gawker.