AFTER SHARING TEARS AND JEERS, THREATS AND ACCUSATIONS, New Jersey’s finest finally have boyfriend breakthroughs that end in celebratory pickle juice shots.
It’s still unclear as ever what Jenni and Roger were fighting about in the first place, but we do know Jionni struck a serious nerve when he suggested Nicole may not be ready to be a mom. Both girls have been wronged by their men, with Roger suggesting Jenni get back with her dirt-bag ex Tom, and Jionni telling Nicole she’s not ready to be a mom.
“I’d rather have my jaw smashed into a thousand pieces,” J-Woww tells Roger, before adding ominously, “The only thing you’re winning at is losing me.”
Now it’s time for Snooki to get back on the leopard print land line and sort everything out.
After Nicole hangs up on Jionni, he calls her back. She picks up and he tries to explain himself. He tells her one of the girls in the picture is his cousin, but when she asks which girl, he says he doesn’t know. After some tears are shed, Jionni continues to explain to her what happened the night before, and Nicole seems to have calmed down a bit. She’s still upset, so when she says goodbye she crawls into her bed to snuggle with Crocodilly. She tells us, “If he cheated, me and my baby are going away,”
Now it’s Jenni and Roger’s turn. He calls her to say he’s on his way to the apartment so they can talk face-to-face, but she says she’s not interested in seeing him after what he said about Tom. After she’s dressed, Roger shows up. He says he doesn’t want to be with someone who doesn’t want to be with him. Both of them acknowledge that they are unhappy, and then Roger says he will not apologize for Saturday.
Meanwhile, Nicole is woken up by the fighting. In her interview, she says that she has to pee and wishes they could go to another room so she could go to the bathroom. Also, how can she be trying to sleep with those giant fake eyelashes flapping around?
Roger says he doesn’t want to end the relationship, but says that she needs to stop being insecure. She says he needs to stop putting up his defensive walls. He apologizes for losing his temper, but he feels like he still did nothing wrong. Jenni still doesn’t know what she wants. Roger explains that they are such opposites but are still attracted to each other, even though they drive each other crazy. They agree that even though they hit a huge bump in their relationship, they still love each other. After they’re done talking, Roger gets up to apologize to Nicole for having to listen to them fight, but not before he gently tosses Jenni off the couch. Don’t worry, she laughs. Or pretends to anyway.
She and Roger decide to call Jionni to convince him to come up to the apartment so he and Nicole can talk and they can still “save his birthday.” Nicole wants to go out now that she knows he’s coming over, so she gets all dolled-up for him. When he arrives, she opens the door and, with tears in her eyes, says “I’m sorry.” She and Jionni hug each other in the doorway, and she asks if he’s mad at her. Jionni says no, he can’t be mad at her, and they hug again and walk upstairs.
Jionni points out his cousin and her friends in the picture Nicole was freaking out about before, and Jenni, Roger, and Jionni laugh at her. They then hop in a cab to a bar for Jionni’s birthday. They take shots of pure pickle juice (not a joke — real pickle juice) and get the night started. Roger and Jenni jokingly bicker about Roger not getting laid once again, and in their interview, Snooki says, completely straight-faced, “I am so over Roger not getting sex from Jionni.” After a second, she and Jenni realize what she said and start laughing hysterically.
Next week, we get to find out the sex of Nicole’s baby! Well, pretend to not have found out already and watch Nicole find out for the first time.
Karen Malmquist is a senior at La Salle University, and the head writer and star of In Other News, a comedy series airing in Philadelphia.