THE NATIONAL ENQUIRER SAYS KELLY PRESTON HAS DUMPED JOHN TRAVOLTA AFTER A SERIES OF MASSEURS claimed he sometimes forcefully tried to make them touch his (reportedly 8 inch) schlong.
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HAVING ALREADY PIMPED OUT HER OWN KID, MADONNA MOVES ON TO MICK JAGGER'S 20-YEAR-OLD DAUGHTER, Georgia.
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ALL HAIL THE TANNING GODS! Snooki will not be raising a mini-me just yet.
Planet Earth breathed a sigh of relief when Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi announced that she'll be having a boy this September, despite her previous wishes for a girl.
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BILLBOARD WINNER ADELE USED TO PLUCK AT A DIFFERENT INSTRUMENT BEFORE SHE WOWED THE WORLD WITH HER VOICE. Here's a photo of the tiny songtress tracked down by Snakkle (never heard of them) when she was a wee one.
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I'M FEELING SYMPATHY FOR THE DEVIL WHO obviously didn't know who he was dealing with when granting Mick Jagger perpetual youthfulness. Oh sure, his cheeks are sunken, but the Rolling Stones frontman popped by Saturday Night Live and proved that he's still got the moves.
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MARK ZUCKERBERG SHOWED US ALL WHO COMES BEFORE THOSE SWAGGERING WALL STREET BANKERS INCENSED ABOUT HIS EVER-PRESENT HOODIE: Priscilla Chan, now wife of the world's second-youngest billionaire, for whom he ditched his regular uniform to exchange vows.
Zuckerberg, 28, donned a navy suit Saturday and married his girlfriend of nine years in a small private ceremony at his Palo Alto, Calif. home. The wedding came just one day after Facebook's IPO hit Wall Street and six days after Chan graduated from the University of California at San Francisco Medical School.
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JOHN TRAVOLTA ACCUSER JOHN DOE NO. 1 JUST UPPED THE ANTE: GLORIA ALLRED HAS TAKEN HIS CASE.
The un-identified masseur withdrew his original lawsuit against the actor after he changed the date of the alleged sexual assault against him.
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THE QUID PRO QUO BETWEEN CELEBRITY AND MEDIA REACHES ITS APEX WITH THE SIT-DOWN INTERVIEW just before a major release. So today, in a Q&A with Playboy, Tom Cruise pays due in advance of his highly-anticipated Rock Of Ages in which he plays an 80s rock legend named Stacee Jaxx.
Cruise, a master of self-control, knows that publicity's price is small truths sold as revelations. So once again, but with more feeling, we hear about the "two things" he "loves most" -- his wife Katie and movies, as well as his hunger for competence, his devotion to family and what it was like growing up with an absent father.
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HOVA'S A HYPOCRITE.
Hey, I'm not judging, just pointing out the obvious. If you're human it's bound to happen sooner or later. But then again, too few think of Jay Z as human, including himself.
The hip hop lord tells CNN that he backs President Barack Obama's support of marriage for gay couples, and he sounds resolute in his support.
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RIHANNA DUMPS BAD BOY CHRIS BROWN ON TWITTER, KANYE CROONS ABOUT MARRYING KIM, AND JOHN TRAVOLTA DECLARES WAR ON HIS MASSEUR ACCUSERS. Let's explore stars trysts' and turns with love celebrity style.
Just days after sending birthday wishes to her abuser over Twitter, Rihanna unfollowed Chris Brown on Twitter after he released a mix of Kanye's Way Too Cold with lyrics presumably aimed at her.
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IT'S OFFICIAL: Britney Spears has signed on as judge of The X Factor for a cool $15 million a year.
The contract makes her the second-highest paid primetime performer on TV, according to StarPulse, but still far behind syndicated jurist Judge Judy who brings in a whopping $45 million annually.
Simon Cowell has been shopping for a high-profile judge to compete with The Voice's Christina Aguilera and Cee Lo Green and American Idol's Jennifer Lopez and Steven Tyler.
"They finally came to terms,'' a source told Us in mid April. "It was a long negotiation . . . Britney was a natural fit." The popster joins L.A. Reid and Cowell as talent judges.
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DID ANNA WINTOUR BANISH KIM KARDASHIAN FROM THE Costume Institute Gala? Oh what delicious gossip wrapped in irony.
Tongues are wagging that the Dragon Lady, otherwise known as the editor of Vogue, refused the reality star an invite to the lavish fashion fundraiser held Monday night. The annual spectacle of stars attracts a bevvy of A-listers, and this year's luminaries included Beyonce, Gwyneth Paltrow, Tom Brady and Gisele. Also in attendance: Kim candy Kanye West, who went noticeably stag. And there's a reason for that reports RadarOnline.
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HAS JOHN TRAVOLTA SPENT HIS ENTIRE ADULT LIFE LIVING A LIE?
For three decades rumors have flourished that the actor who propelled to fame as a sexy dolt on Welcome Back Kotter is gay. As far back as the late 1980s, porn star Paul Barressi claimed that he was Travolta's lover and took a lie detector test to prove it. The National Enquirer and Star tabloids have both published cover storiescontending Travolta had secret gay lovers despite being married to actress Kelly Preston. Those rumors were reinforced when an interior designer wrote a book in 2010 about the A-list actor's exploits in gay bath houses.
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HE WAS MEOW, A PHOTOGENIC FAT CAT WHOSE OBESITY ENTERTAINED THE MASSES. But just weeks after being surrendered by the family of his dying caretaker and thrust into the national spotlight, the five-year-old tabby has passed.
Meow suffered "respiratory distress" over the weekend and wasn't able to be saved, according to Mary Martin, director of Santa Fe Animal Shelter & Humane Society.
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THE NEW YORK DAILY NEWS DESCRIBES THE BEASTIE BOYS' DEBUT ALBUM Licensed To Ill as satire for punks, B-boys and frat brothers too stupid to know better.
That pretty much sums up the band's entire oeuvre. But the hip hop band who fought for our right to party turned grayer yesterday when Adam "MCA" Yauch died, three years after being diagnosed with cancer. He was 47.
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HERE'S SPORTS ILLUSTRATED SWIMSUIT COVER MODEL GIVING THE WORLD A FREE PEAK AT HER GOODS COMPLIMENTS OF FASHION PORNOGRAPHER Terry Richardson.
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HELLO REPORTERS COVERING THE JOHN EDWARDS' TRIAL IN GREENSBORO, N.C.! I don't mean to burden you, but there are so, so many questions remaining about Rielle Hunter's spiritual advisor and that troubling Reuben sandwich.
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THE NAGGING MYSTERY REALLY MAKES ME MISS Rupert Murdock's wiretapping yellow journalists.
Here's Beyonce in this week's People deflating rumors that she used a surrogate to incubate her four-month-old daughter Blue Ivy:
"That was crazy. It wasn't hurtful, it was just crazy. [I thought] 'Where did they come up with this?' "
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WHO KNEW THE TROOPS LOVED HOUSE MUSIC? On Thursday's Pauly D Project, Pauly gets invited to put on a show at a military base camp, and in a rare moment in Jersey Shore-related history, I did not feel bad about my television watching choices.
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ROSIE O'DONNELL HAS A POINT.
The talk show personality pissed off Lindsay Lohan and her embarassing father when she declared that LiLo wasn't up to the task of playing Elizabeth Taylor in a biopic of the Hollywood legend.
'The last thing she did good she was 16,'' O'Donnell said on the Today show Tuesday. "I don't think she's right for the role and I don't think she's capable at this point of doing what's needed.''
The troubled actress rebuffed her remarks by saying:
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KE$HA'S MOTHER MUST BE SO PROUD AS THE SINGER'S latest wild escapade leaves us speechless.
Wednesday morning, the Tik Tok singer posted a picture of herself on Twitter squatting and urinating in the street.
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AS "CAMPAIGN THEATRICS" GO, THIS WAS SPECTACULAR:
"Preezy" Barack Obama joined NBC's Jimmy Fallon onstage Wednesday to ostensibly "slow jam the news." But what he was really jamming were Congressional Republicans on negotiations to extend low interest rates on federal student loans.
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BEYONCE'S BEAUTY POSITIONS HER AT THE TOP OF PEOPLE'S MOST BEAUTIFUL LIST THIS WEEK, BUT IS she acting ugly in real life?
It's no secret that Kanye West and Jay Z are besties, and now gossips claim Beyonce has made it clear that Kim Kardashian isn't welcome to drop by for some tea or muscato.
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A FEW WEEKS AGO I VOWED TO NEVER WRITE about another celebrity's plastic surgery mutilation, but when I saw the latest picture of Catherine-Zeta Jones, I couldn't stop myself.
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I KNOW FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS LINE DANCE, BUT DO THEY TAKE WEEKEND TRIPS TOGETHER TO THE BEACH?
After Mila Kunis denied that she and Ashton Kutcher were nothing but good friends last week, the two were snapped buying flowers and sipping Starbucks together.
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MEGAN FOX, THE GENETICALLY-BLESSED STARLET WITH A PENCHANT FOR BRAGGING, WILL soon have another reason to boast: she's pregnant.
E! News says a "source exclusively" confirmed to them that the Transformers eye candy is expecting her first biological child with husband and former Beverly Hills 90210 star, Brian Austin Green.
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I HAVE TO SAY IT: POP SINGER JUSTIN BIEBER IS ACTING LIKE AN ASS.
Not content with finding himself off the hook for the "Mariah Yeater-Baby Daddy" incident last year, the Canadian pop singer has now chosen to dig the whole scene up again and air it out on Twitter like yesterday's dirty laundry.
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DOES INITIALS MAKE IT EASY FOR KIM KARDASHIAN TO REMEMBER HER BOYFRIENDS?
The reality princess was in the Big Apple this weekend for a meet-and-greet between her parents and alleged new squeeze Kanye West. On Sunday, she was photographed at LAX wearing a new accessory: Yes, boys and girls, Kardashian now sports the tiny gold initials "K.W." in an earlobe, and we all know who that stands for.
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RIHANNA DROPPED BY Giorgio Baldi in Santa Monica, Calif., Thursday conspicuously holding hands with her best friend Melissa Forde. Was Forde just along for the meal or was she actually the "Talk That Talk" singer's date?
"I'm on my first date in almost 2 yearz," the singer tweeted to her 17 million Twitter followers.
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DID AUTHOR PETER JANNEY DRINK SOME ELECTRIC KOOL-AID ACID PUNCH?
In his new book, Janney makes the far-out assertion that President John F. Kennedy Jr. was killed by the CIA because mind-expanding acid trips made him question America's military industrial machine.
Janney makes his argument in Mary's Mosaic: The CIA Conspiracy to Murder John F. Kennedy, Mary Pinchot Meyer, and Their Vision of World Peace," which Huffington Post calls "entertaining trip through the dark possibilities of Washington's covert history."
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MIKE TYSON'S ALL ABOUT THE UNDISPUTED TRUTH THESE DAYS, AND THAT INCLUDES SHARING THAT HE knocked up a prison official while spending three years in prison on rape charges.
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DESPERATE TO LOOK STORYBOOK BEAUTIFUL FOR THEIR WEDDINGS, BRIDES-TO-BE are seeking out a radical new "feeding tube" diet to lose weight. But criticis call the practice "outrageous."
With the K-E Diet, a feeding tube forced through the nose and into the stomach delivers a constant flow of protein-laced water totaling 800 calories a day. The tubal feeding extends for 10 days during which patients can lose up to 20 pounds.
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MEL GIBSON'S DESCENT INTO MADNESS IS WORTHY OF ITS OWN HOLLYWOOD PRODUCED HORROR STORY.
Writer Joe Eszterhas has upped the ante in his dangerous game against the Academy-winning director by releasing audio of Gibson rampaging through his Costa Rica estate. The frightening fit was recorded by Eszterhas' teenage son who was vacationing with his parents, and the writer released it after Gibson claimed Esterhas' accusations detailed in a leaked nine-page letter as "utter fabrications."
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THE INTERNETS WERE AWASH TODAY WITH THE ABOVE GRAPHIC NEATLY DEPICTING HOW BEING THE DAUGHTER OF A FAMOUS PERSON is richly rewarding.
The promotional poster renames HBO's new demographically-promising Girls as Nepotism and then makes its slam-dunk case:
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IS NICKI MINAJ CONTEMPLATING SUICIDE? MediaTakeOut.com posted an email that the pop rapper sent to her peeps behind her fansite, Nickidaily.com.
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KIM KARDASHIAN'S GOT A 5-YEAR-PLAN: TO RUN FOR MAYOR OF 'Armenian town', aka Glendale, California.
Kardashian announces her political ambitions as she's driving through Dallas on an unaired clip of Khole & Lamar.
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I USED TO LOVE YOU, TED NUGENT!
Once upon a time, I used to go to your concerts and fight to the front row as I thought you were a great guitarist. I closed my eyes to your love of guns and hunting, and even years later, I still have an old framed picture of you on the wall.
Ted, what the hell are you thinking speaking like that about the President of the United States? Have you got some sort of Cat Scratch Fever?
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ARMED WITH NOTHING BUT A PACK OF PRINGLES AND SOME GUMMI BEARS, 24-year-old Charles Sonder halted a scuffle on a New York subway without even breaking from snacking.
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YOU HAVE TO BE KIDDING, RIGHT? Why would anyone think of having sex in a port-a-potty where thousands have gone before you?
But that's the latest dirty gossip about Gerard Butler who was hanging with a mysterious brunette at the Coachella music festival in Indio, Calif.
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OH. MY. GAWD. Lover boy Brad Pitt is going to make an honest woman out of the hypervixen Angelina Jolie. Or maybe "legal" is a better word.
The Hollywood Reporter confirms that Angelina, otherwise known as the evil queen or specifically, Maleficent, is wearing a diamond engagement ring gifted to her and co-designed by Brad Pitt.
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LADY GAGA EXPOSED HERSELF TO BE EITHER HUMAN OR A HYPOCRITE (is that redundant?) in a tweet she sent out about skipping food.
"Just killed back to back spin classes,'' Gah wrote Thursday. "Eating a salad dreaming of a cheeseburger #PopSingersDontEat."
Excuse me, Miss Thing? Aren't you supposed to be the anti-diet, love-who-you-are, bullies-are-bad advocate?
For her careless words, America's most contrived popster got verbal spankings from fans on Twitter as well as healthy eating advocates.
"Huh?," responded the National Eating Disorders Association. "This is the same person who recently implored girls to stop dieting?"
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FRIDAY AND WE'RE ALL FEELING FLY, RIGHT? Well travel a little higher with this YouTube video of a bad-ass doubledutching dog.
Time to plan your road trip to Dollywood in Tennessee, where Geronimo pops this summer.
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BRITNEY SPEARS IS A SIGNATURE AWAY FROM BECOMING THE newest judge on Simon Cowell's X-Factor.
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YO KANYE, I'M A LET YOU FINISH MAKING A FOOL OUT OF YOURSELF, BUT JAY Z HAS ONE OF THE BEST BEATCHES OF ALL TIME!
There it is, on the cover of this week's Us magazine, -- the "real story" of Kanye's "crazy love" for Kim Kardashian.
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MEDIATAKEOUT GOT ITS HANDS ON THE SALARY FIGURES FOR THOSE SASSY GALS FROM The Real Housewives Of Atlanta and the numbers will make you wonder why Sheree Whitfield is always broke. To wit:
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AT LEAST HE'LL ALWAYS HAVE KHLOE, right?
Reality husband Lamar Odom is out at the Dallas Mavericks, the AP reports.
The team's GM Donnie Nelson called Odom's short career with the Mavs "a difficult and frustrating year for Odom, the team and the fans and that it's time to move on,'' the AP reported earlier today.
The team has nine games left in the season but Odom will ride it out on the inactive list.
"The Mavericks and I have mutually agreed that it's in the best interest of both parties for me to step away from the team," Odom released in a statement. "I'm sorry that things didn't work out better for both of us, but I wish the Mavs' organization, my teammates and Dallas fans nothing but continued success in the defense of their championship."
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IT WAS ONLY WEEKS AGO WHEN WAGS WONDERED IF BORN TO DIE SINGER Lana Del Ray had her sights set on Marilyn Manson after being spotted in an elevator near his hotel room.
A gossip column in the Berlin newspaper BZ reported that the two were seen sharing a meal just before Manson sang at the Echo awards with the popular German metal band Rammstein.
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IT SPEAKS VOLUMES THAT PAPARAZZI MISTOOK ACTRESS LINDSAY LOHAN FOR Debbie Harry, the 66-year-old rocker from Blondie.
Once America's reigning teen starlet, the 25-year-old star has been ravaged by drugs and poor supervision in predatory Hollywood. The decay shows on her face in a new YouTube video making the rounds on the web.
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GIRLFRIEND JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT IS SEXY AND SHE KNOWS IT, SO SHE FIGURES SHE'S LOOKING GOOD ENOUGH for Maroon 5 frontman Adam Levine.
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IN THE CURRENCY OF GOSSIP NO NAMES CARRY MORE WEIGHT THAN KIM KARDASHIAN'S AND KANYE WEST'S. Mix the two together and you've got an explosive mix of celebrity gossip alchemy.
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I'M GONNA PULL A TOURÈ HERE AND ACCUSE DAFFY BRITISH JOURNALIST LAURIE PENNY OF NOT knowing what the F she speaks of when she disses Ryan Gosling's rescue of her as no big deal.
There she was, crossing 6th Avenue, minding her business, perhaps pining for a cheese sandwich, when America's defacto "sexiest" actor plucked Penny from the path of an oncoming taxi.
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FAME HAS NEVER SEEMED MORE INTOXICATING OR ALLURING THAN IT DOES in the latest trailer for the heavy metal spoof Rock Of Ages, and believe me, I've seen the delusional consequences of the drug up close.
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SOME IN THE BLACK COMMUNITY ARE CRYING "FOWL" AFTER Burger King pulled a controversial commercial featuring Mary J. Blige singing about eating chicken.
The fast-food giant blames a concern over music licensing for the commercial's withdrawal and not allegations that it perpetuates stereotypes.
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FORMER CULT CLASSIC TWIN PEAKS star Lara Flynn Boyle is catching headlines for all the wrong reasons.
A recent photo unkindly captures her wilted beauty and had wags speculating about just what happened to her face.
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A TEXAS PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR CLAIMS O.J.'S SON KILLED NICOLE BROWN AND FRIEND RON GOLDMAN.
In his new book (of course), William C. Dear believes that former football great O. J. Simpson is innocent of the murders he was acquitted of in 1995. The author of O.J. Is Innocent and I Can Prove It, accuses Simpson's son Jason of killing his stepmother Nicole Brown and her friend Ron Goldman on June 12, 1994.
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HERE's THE STING OF SOCIAL MEDIA: instant reaction that disrupts innocent lives many miles away.
Director Spike Lee found himself eating his words Wednesday after he retweeted what he thought was the home address of Sanford, Fla. neighborhood watch shooter George Zimmerman.
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ONCE THE BUTT OF A JOKE ON FOX'S HIT GLEE, Lindsay Lohan may now be slated to play herself on an episode.
Sue-happy Dina Lohan, who also jumped on Pitbull after he famously rapped that he "got it locked up like Lindsay Lohan," called out the show and the network after the Super Bowl episode earlier this year.
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ACTRESS ALICIA SILVERSTONE IS A beautiful and smart actress but, honestly, the staunch vegan really needs to find another way to feed that baby of hers.
I'm not one to judge someone's parenting, but in a "clueless" moment, Silverstone shows us on YouTube her feeding her 10-month-old-son like a mother bird.
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APPARENTLY INSULTING WOMEN IS THE NEW 'IN' THING THESE DAYS. Women around the world are taking Reebok to task for its latest ad campaign, "Cheat on your girlfriend, not on your workout."
Reebok has pulled the controversial sales pitch after the news of the posters went viral and people started complaining.
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SUPPORT IS GROWING FOR Jenna Talackova who was booted from the Miss Universe Canada pageant for being a transgender. A petition started by a man in Brooklyn, New York, is being hosted on www.change.org to get the transgendered finalist Talackova 23 of Vancouver reinstated.
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THE LAST FEW DAYS HAVEN'T BEEN GREAT FOR Madonna, and by the looks of it, she now has daughter troubles.
First, YouTube banned Madonna's new video Girl Gone Wild from the under-18 set for "bump and grind" and crotch-grabbing shots. Then Deadmau5, a leading producer of progressive house music, called the Material Girl out for asking how a crowd at the Ultra Music Festival if they've "seen Molly."
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IS ANOTHER MEDIA-CREATED KARDASHIAN MARRIAGE ABOUT TO HIT THE SKIDS -- or is Kris Jenner up to her usual tricks again?
The ink on the Kim Kardashian "flour bombing" news is barely dry and now rumors are circulating that Khloe, 27 and her husband, NBA player Lamar Odom 32, are contemplating divorcing for the good of the show.
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MAD MEN IS BACK! No one is more excited about this than I am. Except maybe Matt Weiner, who was against going on this comically long hiatus in the first place.
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THIS NEWS TAKES THE CAKE: Kim Kardashian was flour-bombed in the lobby of the London Hotel in West Hollywood hotel last night while touting her new fragrance line.
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WHITNEY HOUSTON DIED OF AN ACCIDENTAL DROWING AND THE effects of cocaine and heart disease, the Los Angeles coroner's office announced Thursday.
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MADONNA'S NEW VIDEO Girl Gone Wild struck a few déjà vue chords when I watched it this morning. The Material Girl is always fearless and pushes boundaries of creativity, but there was something in this video I had seen before.
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DARK SHADOWS star Johnny Depp and French chanteuse Vanessa Paradis denied their relationship was in trouble over a month ago, but it looks like Depp never got the memo.
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DID RIHANNA LIFT OFF ON ASHTON KUTCHER'S ROCKET SHIP?
Paps caught the The Birthday Girl singer dropping in at Ashton Kutcher's playboy digs with her security during Wednesday morning's wee hours and TMZ has got the pictures.
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Credit: Springwise DAME EDNA'S "MOTHER USED TO SAY THERE ARE NO STRANGERS, only friends you haven't met yet. She's now in a maximum security twilight home in Australia."
Tony award-winning Barry Humphries will retire along with "Dame Edna," the beloved drag queen with the purple hair and oversized rhinestone eyeglasse, after he completes his last show, Eat Pray, Laugh. Humphries will be her farewell tour in Canberra, Australia, on June 22 and then journey to Britain and New York to close Madam's 57-year-long career.
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OH GOD, DON'T LET THIS BE TRUE. Apparently, camera lover, Brandy's brother, and wannabe rapper Ray-J has some "adult films" starring him and Whitney Houston.
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HUFFINGTON POST DECLARES VOGUE ITALIA'S MARCH FASHION SPREAD "HOOD COUTURE," but is it racist or just "ghetto fab"?
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WHAT'S A POPSICLE WORTH? Fifty cents? A dollar? Five dollars if it's gourmet? If you're Tiger Woods, whatever the cost it's too much to share with a colleague.
Tiger's former swing coach Hank Haney has a new book coming out entitled The Big Miss --in which he shares stories about golf's fallen legend.
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TIM BURTON AND JOHNNY DEPP team up once again for an offbeat spoof of the old 60's cult soap opera, Dark Shadows.
The daytime soap about an accursed vampire haunting his beloved mansion featured the late actress Joan Bennett and Falcon Crest's David Selby.
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THE MOST ANTICIPATED FILM OF THE YEAR The Hunger Games debuts March 23 and suffering from Twilight withdrawal, I cannot wait.
And I've got lots of company.
"The film has sold out over 1,000 showtimes," Harry Medved of Fandango, the online box-office service, tells The Philadelphia Inquirer. "It's among the top-selling titles on Fandango -- ever."
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AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL contestant Louise Watts had a meltdown last night during the judging feedback portion. Sweet British judge Nigel told Watts she looked "strong," tough" and "mean."
"Mean?" Louise asked in disbelief. "Pshhh. I can't win."
"I think you need to put some gratitude in your attitude, girl," PR heavyweight Kelly Cutrone told the 25-year-old Essex, England native.
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ELVIS' 22-YEAR-OLD GRANDDAUGHTER RILEY KEOUGH, daughter of Lisa Marie, is engaged to actor Alex Pettyfer, Us reports. The couple, who have been dating for a “lengthy” six months, were last spotted having lunch in Los Angeles and Keough was wearing a rock on her ring finger.
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THIS WEEK WE WROTE THAT Whitney Houston's only daughter was reportedly seeing Houston's "secret son" Nick Gordon. The late Grammy winning singer never adopted him but raised him for ten years as her very own.
Bobbi Kristina always called him her "brother" and now Grandma Cissy Houston has seen video of the two kissing each other and is not happy.
Now Star reports that "Nick proposed to Krissy on March 10, and she said yes. Krissy said Nick is the only person she trusts in the world. They have a very deep connection."
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THE LATEST KIM KARDASHIAN FEUD AMUSES ME. Never mind that she's left in her wake dozens of disillusioned sponsors and/or spouses-- she of questionable fame has tried to fan the flames of real actor Jon Hamm's heated words.
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SAD TIMES, KIDDIES. After 244 years in print, Encyclopaedia Britannica is no more. The New York Times reports that the 2010 paper edition was the last chance kids around the globe will have to flip curiously through the wonders of the world: pictures of lizards doing it, male and female anatomy, and Lake Titicaca.
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THE LATEST POP PRINCESS THAT SIMON COWELL IS TRYING TO SNAG FOR HIS FLAILING X FACTOR: British songstress Adele.
EntertainmentWise reports that Simon is "desperate" to lure the Grammy winning singer to his ratings-challenged talent show.
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KELLY, MAYBE DYLAN WILL TAKE YOU BACK!
There's buzz everywhere about the split between Twilight's Peter Facinelli and former 90210 star Jennie Garth. According to E! Online, the couple released a joint statement:
"While we have decided to end our marriage, we both share the same deep love and devotion to our children . We remain dedicated to raising our beautiful daughters together. We ask for privacy and respect during this time."
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IN YET ANOTHER BAT SH*T CRAZY MOVE, SINGER COURTNEY LOVE ACCUSES PUPPETS OF RAPING HER DEARLY DEPARTED.
TMZ reports that Love believes that Kermit the Frog and his Muppet friends have "raped" the memory of her late husband Kurt Cobain -- by bastardizing Nirvana's Smells Like Teen Spirit in their 2011 movie without her permission.
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ORDINARILY WE DON'T TRAFFIC IN BLIND ITEMS because it's a little like playing telephone with pathological liars: who can tell where the truth begins and the lie ends?
But when celebrity dirt falls just two degrees away from the subject, well, we see it as our duty to deliver the goods while still protecting ourselves! Thus we have two nuggets of news to pass on with clues. Here goes:
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"I AM ON THE DRUNK DIET,'' LADY GAGA BRAGGED DURING AN INTERVIEW ON SIRIUS' The Morning Mash Up last year.
"I live my life as I want to, creatively," Gah said at the time. " I like to drink whiskey and stuff while I am working. But the deal is I've got to work out every day, and I work out hung over if I am hung over. "
Was this an actual diet or just nonsense?, I wondered. Now I have my answer: Today, Gaga's ex-beau releases his memoir The Drunk Diet: How I Lost 40 Pounds …Wasted.
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BOBBI KRISTINA WANTS TO DROP THE "BROWN,'' IN AN EFFORT TO FURTHER CUT TIES WITH HER FATHER, singer Bobby Brown.
The late Whitney Houston's only child first attempted to change her name when Brown and Houston separated, but her mother stopped her cold from legally becoming "Kristina Houston."
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OPRAH WINFREY'S EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW WITH THE FAMILY OF THE LATE WHITNEY HOUSTON was missing someone that we have not heard from at all in the media.
The hour-long episode Oprah's Next Chapter featured Winfrey discussing the life and death of the famed singer with Houston's brother Gary Houston, sister-in-law Patricia Houston, and her daughter, Bobbi Kristina.
However there was no mention of Whitney Houston's "secret son" 22-year-old Nicholas Gordon whom Houston raised for 10 years. Now there's reports that Gordon has an exceptionally close relationship with Bobby Brown's daughter, Bobbi Kristina.
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BRITNEY SPEAR'S FIANCE JASON TRAWICK IS NEGOTIATING A CONTRACT FOR THE POPSTER TO JOIN The X Factor.
According to a The Hollywood Reporter, the deal could be struck as soon as next week.
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WHITNEY HOUSTON LEFT EVERYTHING TO HER ONLY SURVIVING CHILD, 19-YEAR-OLD BOBBI KRISTINA,.
"Krissy" will inherit the late pop star's entire estate valued at around $20 million. No specific assets were mentioned but Houston's furnishings, clothing, personal effects, jewelry and cars all go to the teenager who has struggled to cope with her mother's death.
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DO THESE REALITY TV STARS HAVE BREADCRUMBS FOR BRAINS?
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EVERY PARENT'S WORST NIGHTMARE HAS HAPPENED: Snooki confirms she's pregnant in the newest issue of Us Weekly.
The issue, which hit newsstands today, shows off Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi's baby bump, with the headline, "OMG-- I'm pregnant!" OMG indeed.
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EMILY BARNETT'S TWITTER ACCOUNT SAYS SHE'S ALWAYS ON A MISSION, and yesterday it was to remind us all that we've got a long way to go, baby.
Or, as she put it in Twitterspeak, "#riseupwomen."
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THE FORMER MANAGER OF A RESTAURANT OWNED BY Food Network's Paula Deen and her brother is suing the duo claiming Bubba Hiers treated her like a hot and spicy dish.
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OPRAH HAS LANDED AN UPCOMING INTERVIEW WITH Whitney Houston's only child, 19-year-old Bobbi Kristina.
Promoted as a tribute on Oprah's Next Chapter, the exclusive will air on the Oprah Winfrey Network March 11 and smells of sensationalism and opportunism. Bobbi Kristina is reported to be wrestling with her own addiction issues and sources told tabloids that she's emotionally traumatized by the death of her mother.
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ASHTON KUTCHER CLAIMS HE'S UNATTACHED BUT THE VISUAL EVIDENCE PROVES CONTRARY.
US Weekly reveals the 34-year-old actor and Nick And Norah's Infinite Playlist writer Lorene Scafaria attended the X Prize charity bash together on Feb. 25, and were far from platonic.
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WIZ KHALIFA POPPED THE BIG ONE AND AMBER ROSE SAID YES.
"He has made me the Happiest Woman in the World!" tweeted the bald-pated model shortly after Wiz informed the world that she accepted his proposal.
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THERE'S NO BETTER CURE FOR A BAD BREAKUP THAN TRANSFORMATION and Katy Perry is apparently taking a step in that empowering direction.
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IS THERE A TEST FOR FETAL ALCOHOL SYNDROME AT THREE MONTHS IN UTERO?
Sources tell the New York Post that perpetual party girl is preggers but keeping the news under wraps so she can sell it to a tabloid.
Check out What To Expect When Snooki's Expecting: The Fallout On Jersey Shore
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IT ISN'T TOO HARD TO IMAGINE MEGAN FOX AS A TEEN DEVOURING COSMOPOLITAN for the latest sex tease tips and lipstick colors. Where else could she have learned that a potty mouth was pretty?
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THE NEW YORK POST'S CAROLINE PERRY CLAIMS Rooney Mara from The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo was courted heavily by designers seeking to show off their creations on the Oscars' red carpet. Mara was the designer's prize this year because of her lithe frame and what one observer called her "air of mystery." So while I eagerly awaited Mara's red carpet debut, I watched a vast array of goddesses in one-shouldered gowns arrive at 84th Academy Awards red carpet.
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KHLOE KARDASHIAN HAS FINALLY ADDRESSED THE CONSTANT SPECULATION ABOUT THE IDENTITY OF HER REAL DAD.
Coincidentally timed (hah!) just as her reality show Khloe & Lamar returns for its second season, Mrs. Odom admits in an interview with Hot 97 that she isn't sure who her real father really is.
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PROVOCATEUR SACHA BARON COHEN PUSHED THE BOUNDARIES OF HIS LATEST STUNT TODAY by releasing a video exclaiming he was "outraged" over being banned from Sunday's Academy Awards.
"While I applaud the academy for taking away my right to free speech," Admiral General Aladeen declared, "I warn you that if you do not lift your sanctions and give me my tickets back by 12 p.m. on Sunday you will face unimaginable consequences!"
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WHEN HOLLYWOOD STARS WEAR DESIGNER DRESSES ON THE ACADEMY AWARDS' red carpet they obviously can't keep "sucking it in all night," so many wear an elastic foundation garment called Spanx. At least, the actresses that eat do.
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ADELE FLIPS THE BIRD, OBAMA CROONS ABOUT HIS SWEET HOME CHICAGO, AND LEVI'S MISSES THE BIG PICTURE. Welcome to Miz J's Whack Wednesday.
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TMZ POSTED A SHOT OF DREW BARRYMORE AND FIANCE WILL KOPELMAN leaving a Beverly Hill's doctors office holding what appears to be a sonogram in her hand.
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BARELY DEAD A WEEK, WHITNEY HOUSTON'S BELONGINGS ARE ALREADY HITTING THE AUCTION BLOCK.
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CHRIS BROWN AND RIHANNA SIMULTANEOUSLY TWEETED LINKS TO SONG REMIXES FEATURING EACH OTHER'S vocals, turning up speculation that exlovers are dating again.
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THEY BARELY HAD THE WHITNEY HOUSTON'S CASKET OUT OF THE CHURCH WHEN HER daughter Bobbi Kristina disappeared abruptly. Despite repeated frantic calls to her cell phone, the family couldn't locate her for several hours before her mom was buried the next day. Now the Daily Beast reports that she was found hours later doing drugs.
"It's a horrible situation for everybody," a close friend told the online site. "They tried to save Whitney, and it didn't work. Now with Bobbi Kristina, they fear the same thing is happening again and they won't be able to stop it either. "
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MAYA RUDOLPH TAKES A COMEDIC TURN AS BEYONCE ON THIS WEEK'S Saturday Night Live which imagines an impromptu welcoming party for baby Blue Ivy.
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WHITNEY HOUSTON'S MEMORIAL SERVICE WAS MUCH LIKE HER LIFE: GRAND and filled with players, admirers, enablers and drama.
Saturday's four-hour service at the New Hope Baptist Church in Newark, New Jersey, was a veritable Who's Who among black entertainment, including Oprah Winfrey, Stevie Wonder, Whitney Houston, Alicia Keys and Mary J. Blige among others, according to the Newark Star-Ledger.
"As you all know, we have more stars here than the Grammys," church Chairman Curtis Farrow said.
Whitney's mother revealed in a letter in the service program that she always felt that her daughter would die young. “I never told you that when you were born, the Holy Spirit told me that you would not be with me long,'' gospel singer Cissy Houston confided, "but I thank God for the beautiful flower he allowed me to raise and cherish for 48 years. Rest, my baby girl in peace." The note was signed "Mommie."
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THE FOLLOWING CELEBRITIES WERE IDENTIFIED AS HAVING ATTENDED WHITNEY'S FUNERAL, according to The Newark Star-Ledger reporters and city officials:
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RAY J IS REELING FROM THE LOSS OF HIS "close friend" Whtney Houston, who flipped out the day before her death and accused another singer of trying to steal her boy toy.
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RIHANNA REALLY DOES LOVE THE THUG LIFE. The pop star so loves violence that she invited her abuser Chris Brown to her celebrity-filled 24th birthday party where the former lovers spent the night "nuzzling" together.
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WHEN HER BODY FINALLY GAVE UP, 95-YEAR-OLD ZELDA KAPLAN WENT OUT WITH HER HEELS UP AND A FIRE-ENGINE RED HAT STILL GRACING HER HEAD.
She wouldn't have wanted it any other way.
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CLASSY AS EVER, Chris Brown unwisely took to Twitter early this week to try to stand up to his "haters."
Apparently, Brown is surprised that there are some people -- many, actually -- who think he didn't deserve the second chance he received at Grammy to redeem himself after beating the crap out of Rihanna.
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AT 2 p.m. on E's Countdown to the Red Carpet, host Giuliana Rancic and Ryan Seacrest were both dressed in somber black. I knew then that my instinct was right: White Houston's death would have impact on Grammy fashions: Amid a sea of black on the red carpet there were but a few buoys of color.
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CALL YOUR UNCLES! CALL YOUR DISTANT COUSINS AND YOUR LONG-LOST FRIENDS! There's been a death in the family.
A pall fell over Sunday's 54th Grammy Awards, held just 24 hours after Whitney Houston was found dead. And though the news had yet to sink in, that age-old adage the "party must go on" applied.
Consequently, music's biggest night was like a funeral wake for which distant relatives and far-flung friends gather, all laughs are twinged with knowing, and the elders assume their rank within the family.
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HER BEAUTY AND HER GIFT OF SONG BELIED THE TRUTH ABOUT WHITNEY HOUSTON: she was a hot mess who gravitated toward trouble.
"The biggest devil is me,'' the pop superstar said during a 2002 interview. "I'm either my best friend or my worst enemy."
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SUPERSTARS JAY-Z AND BEYONCE UNWRAPPED THEIR PRECIOUS progeny to the world today, uploading the first look at Blue Ivy Carter on her very own tumbler account.
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NICOLAS CAGE TRIED TO LAY TO REST RUMORS THAT HE'S A VAMPIRE who's walked the earth since the the 1860s, but would you believe him? After all, he's been accused of some pretty shady dealings in the past. And he did once own a medieval castle in Bavaria which some speculated he purchased to "embrace the vampire lifestyle."
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IMAGINE YOUR WORST NIGHTMARE BECOMING A REALITY: An extremely violent man who has stalked you in the past escapes from a mental hospital.
Robert Dewey Hoskins, who has previously served a 10-year prison sentence for stalking Madonna, escaped Metropolitan State Hospital last week and was only recaptured about 9 a.m. this morning. Police described Hoskins as psychotic and violent.
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ALL IS FINALLY RIGHT FOR AMERICA'S MEATBALLS Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi and Jenni "J-Woww" Farley. Jerramiah Healy, the mayor of Jersey City, New Jersey, offers his city for them to wreak havoc in for their spin-off show, scheduled to begin production next month. Snooki is officially not pregnant. New Jersey governor Chris Christie looks like he’s already eaten his harsh words about the duo. Hoboken has to live with the harsh reality that the “Shore” spin-off rating will trump their hometown pride and joy, Cake Boss. And the world is finally at peace.
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WE ONLY HAVE TO TAKE ONE GLIMPSE At the pictures of a very gaunt McCaulay Culkin clutching a Red Bull to begin wondering if he is on the Demi Moore diet.
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EVERY TIME I THINK I'VE HEARD IT ALL FROM JERSEY SHORE'S SNOOKI, I get slapped in the face with yet one more juicy tidbit.
Snooki Polizzi announced yesterday on a press tour for the MTV series that she is bisexual. "I would consider myself bi,'' she tells HuffPo during a wide-ranging interview on sex, family, feminism and fame. "I've done stuff with girls before. But I would never be with a girl because I like... penis."
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WORD IS CHRIS BROWN AND RIHANNA ARE GOING TO PERFORM at the Grammys. For those placing bets with their bookies, the odds are a compulsive gambler's dream.
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WE ADORE MICHELLE WILLIAMS FOR her poignant turn as the luminous Marilyn Monroe, and for her devotion to being a great mum to six-year-old Matilda Ledger. So we feel we're perfectly justified in giving her advice: Stop letting your daughter dress you!
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SEEMS LIKE POP'S BIGGEST ACT ADELE CAN'T CATCH A BREAK WITH THE BOYS.
First she got her heart broken by that cad who inspired 21. Then she gets dissed by the always snide Noel Gallagher from the English band Oasis, who predicts she'll be a flash in the pan. "I feel sorry for girls in the music industry," he said. "They do have a very short shelf life."
Now famed Chanel designer Karl Lagerfeld dares to call the hottest-selling act 'fat.'
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SHEATHED IN A RED ALICE TEMPERLY DRESS, BEYONCE stepped out for the first time last night to attend the first of two benefit concerts husband Jay-Z is performing at Carnegie Hall.
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MADONNA GETS MY GOLDEN POMPOM AWARD FOR Sunday's smokin' Super Bowl XLVI Halftime show last night that drew 114 million viewers -- the largest television audience in American history.
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IN A "WHO CARES" STORY FOR THE MORNING, KIM KARDASHIAN HAS SWORN off dating football players ever again -- thanks to Reggie Bush.
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FOR YEARS THE ONE OVERRIDING IMPRESSION PEOPLE HAVE HAD ABOUT BRAD PITT was that he's pussy-whipped. Now he's expanding that image to include 'desperate.'
Ever since Pitt was nominated for an Academy Award for his performance in Moneyball, you can't shut him up.
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PIPPA, THE COMMONER SISTER OF CATHERINE, DUCHESS OF CAMBRIDGE, is back in a serious relationship with longtime pal George Percy, whose father is one of the richest men in Britain.
Percy, 27, will someday be the Duke of Northumberland and inherit $400 million. Plus, he's got a touch of magic as his family's Alnwick Castle was used as the setting for Hogwarts in Harry Potter movies.
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THE SOURCE SAID "BUT."
When the news broke that Demi Moore was hospitalized for seizure after "smoking something" like incense, her estranged hubby Ashton Kutcher was partying at a Brazilian club with a full beer and a bevy of beauties."
Naturally, the world's wags watched to see if Kutcher would weigh in on her health scare, or maybe even fly to her side.
Instead, a source told People magazine: "Ashton is deeply concerned for Demi. He still cares about her and wants the best for her. But their marriage is ending and they are both moving on with their lives."
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YOU NEED A LICENSE TO DRIVE. BUT WHEN IT COMES TO BEING A MOTHER, all it takes is a ho with her legs wide open.
Take Courtney Love, for instance.
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IS JERSEY SHORE MEATBALL SNOOKI PREGNANT OR DID SHE EAT A PICKLE?
Star magazine reports that the spitfire is expecting after she tweeted she felt sick and was having food cravings. "She is pregnant and has only told her closest friends and some family," an alleged "insider" tells the mag.
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THE SAME CABLE CHANNEL THAT GAVE DOG ABUSER AND FOOTBAL PLAYER MikeVick the Sportsman of the Year award has suddenly refused to air Nicki Minaj's latest video Stupid Hoe.
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THERE'S NEW BUZZ ABOUT Christina Aguilera's burlesque outing at Etta James funeral last Saturday. Wags are agog about everything from her 'Secretary Porn' outfit to her overkill performance. And now comes new speculation: what was that brown liquid that dripped down her right her leg while she sang James' signature song, At Last?
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SUNDAY'S SUPERBOWL PARTY ON NBC PROMISES SOMETHING FOR EVERYBODY: Madonna at halftime, Ferris Bueller for the Generation Xers and now -- a near-naked David Beckham for the girlfriends and wives.
L.A.'s Galaxy's taut tatooed midfielder flexes near-naked in a commercial for Swedish clothier H&M as The Animals' 1965 hit Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood.
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BRADD PITT ADMITS HE WANTS TO MARRY LONG-TIME GIRLFRIEND Angelina Jolie soon despite once declaring the couple would not wed until gay marriage is legalized in the US.
In an interview with The Hollywood Reporter, Pitt says making that final commitment means a lot to his brood of six.
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BRAD PITT AND HIS LONGTIME LOVE ANGELINA JOLIE have a mutual understanding when it comes to their kids’ cyber education: the famous parents of Maddox, Zahara , Shiloh, Pax, Knox and Vivienne told the German Magazine Bild that they've blocked their names on Google.
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THE LATE ETTA JAMES WAS HONORED WITH A ROUSING FUNERAL Saturday at the Greater Bethany Community Church City of Refuge in Gardena, Calif.
Instead of Beyonce -- who portrayed James' in the movie Cadillac Records -- Christina Aguilera was chosen to sing Etta’s famous song At Last.
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COULD MATTHEW BRODERICK BE REPRISING HIS ROLE AS Ferris Bueller in Ferris Bueller's Day Off? Broderick's not talking, but a video leaked on to YouTube raises the question.
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LATE MONDAY SOMEONE CALLED 911 FOR DEMI MOORE BECAUSE SHE REPORTEDLY INHALED TOO MUCH NITRO-OXIDE.
Nitro what?
Then the story changed today on TMZ and read: "She smoked something…not marijuana but it's similar to incense."
Excuse me? Get your derrieres out of your heads, people! Demi probably smoked the new synthetic pot called "Spice."
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WORD ON THE STREET IS THAT THE DIVINE OPRAH has reportedly been chosen to be the godmother of Beyonce and Jay-Z's bundle of joy, baby Blue Ivy Carter. Who knew that the power couple was that close to her? Oh, that's right: the Illuminati is supposed to be a secret.
Update: Oprah's BFF swears her benefactor isn't Blue Ivy's god mom.
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I WAS ALL LIKE STFU! AFTER TIM GUNN CONFESSED he's been fallow in the bedroom for 29 years. The Project Runway pacesetter epitomizes polish and charm. And he's a bonafide celebrity after serving nine years as mentor to fashion designers on the cable series hosted by Heidi Klum. He's even guest-starred as himself in episodes of Gossip Girl and How I Met Your Mother. On top of all that he's trim and handsome to boot. You just know sexual opportunity knocks.
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AS RUMORS GO THIS ONE'S THE MOTHER LODE: JENNIFER ANISTON IS REPORTEDLY PREGNANT. Prepare for the tabloid onslaught.
Everybody's favorite Mrs. Lonelyhearts, always detoured on love's highway, showed up at screening for HBO's Paradise Lost 3: Purgatory with a swollen belly. (And no, it was not the kind you get from being starving thin or suffering a bad case of gas.) For now, at least, Jen appears happily stuck at the hip with beau Justin Theroux whom she started dating last May, even plunking down $21 million for an 8,500-square-foot Mid-Century Modern mansion in Ooh La La Bel-Air, Calif. to reportedly nest with him.
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MONTHS AFTER TABLOIDS AND GOSSIPS HINTED THAT Demi Moore's drug use was contributing to her marital problems, TMZ reports that the heartbroken star is being treated for "substance abuse" after being rushed to the hospital last night.
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THE QUESTION COULD BE STRAIGHT OUT of a Carrie Bradshaw column from Sex And The City: Are people born homosexual -- or do they choose to be gay?
The debate has raged for decades, with gay rights advocates contending that the question insults homosexuals and plays into the hands of conservatives and religious fundamentalists. Now actress Cynthia Nixon, who played Miranda on the hit HBO series, has provoked another round of debate by telling the New York Times in a profile that she "choose" to be gay.
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KATE MOSS PROMOTES STALKING IN A NEW AD CAMPAIGN FOR BRITISH CLOTHIER MANGO. The campaign was shot by reknown fashion-pornographer Terry Richardson. The clothes are meh, the score is awful, but Kate still can swish at 38.
THEY MADE LOVE LOOK EASY. Now Heidi Klulm and Seal are doing the same for divorce.
Just days after TMZ broke the news and the couple confirmed it with a statement, the singer-songwriter Seal has spoken publicly about his separation from his wife of six years to TV hosts Ellen DeGeneres and Tavis Smiley. He acknowledged that both are "grieving" over the loss.
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LET THE BAD PUNS FLY! RUMOR IS THAT MODEL HEIDI KLUM AND HER HUSBAND SEAL ARE DIVORCING. I guess they couldn't make it work. Is Seal 'in or out' of the house? Hello, divorce court, auf wiedersehen, marriage!
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STILL CRAZY AFTER ALL THESE YEARS! It's been a decade since American Idol debuted, and besides being the gold standard in reality singing competitions, what helps keep the show ahead of the pack is its never-ending supply of madness.
Really, what other show has late night hosts creating segments called "Steven Tyler's Creepy Leer of the Night"
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RIHANNA LOVES THE WAY IT HURTS, JENNIFER LOPEZ RETWEETS SWEET NOTHINGS, AND BRANGELINA BIRTHS ANOTHER PREGNANCY RUMOR. It's hump day for Love Celebrity Style.
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HERE'S ANGELINA JOLIE GIVING HER PUBLIC A SNEAK VIEW OF THE performance she gives every day in her dressing room.
"Mirror, mirror, who's the fairest of them all?, she haughtily whispers.
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THE OLD JAY-Z WOULD FIND THIS SWAGGERIFIC; THE NEW JAY-Z, PERHAPS NOT: TMZ reports that medicinal pot shops in California have dubbed a new strain of cannibis 'OG Blue Ivy' on honor of the hip hop master's new daughter.
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RICKY GERVAIS PULLED THE OL' SWITCH AND BAIT: He promised prime ribbing but instead served cheap cuts.
"Phew! Thank fuck that's over," Gervais wrote in his first post-Golden Globes blog post.
Peewww is more like it.
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FINALLY! The Kardashians are catching some headlines! Although it's been speculated (and harshly joked about) for years, new allegations about Khloe's paternity have surfaced -- as well new claims of Bruce Jenner's cross-dressing -- and this time they come from former Kardashians.
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IN CASE YOU ERRANTLY THOUGHT THAT Beyonce and Jay-Z would downplay the birth of daughter Blue Ivy Carter, here's some more news about Jesus' cool new baby sister: Turns out Blue's living better in her first week of life than you have in all your years. Girlfriend is drooling and shitting all over a $3,000 Lucite crib. Will be chillin' three times daily in a $15,000 Swarovski-studded high chair. Waiting to learn how to sit up so she can ride her $600,000 rocking horse.
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OH, LA LA! LOOK AT SULTRY KATIE HOLMES' SUGGESTING THAT YOU TOO, CAN LOOK FABULOUS. Especially if you wear the right jewelry.
Tom Cruise's better half appears provocatively in print ads running in Israel for the jeweler H. Stern. The ads depict the actress wearing a come-hither stare, a tiny bikini and tasteful jewels. And she's killing it. Salivate over a few more shots inside.
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OYE, SO WE KNOW JAY-Z ISN'T KIDDING WHEN HE ALLUDES TO THE ''THRONE." Jigga man's really letting his entitlement fly now that the child of destiny's child's arrived.
A new rap song, $1.3 million spent to turn a hospital wing into a private party, celebrity shout-outs on Twitter. And all to celebrate the arrival of Blue Ivy, whose name is also speculated to further glorify hip hop's reigning couple.
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FOR THE BILLIONTH TIME, THE RICH ARE DIFFERENT FROM YOU AND ME. Latest case in point: Elin Nordegren's razing of a $12 million dollar house in North Palm Beach, Florida.
Tiger's ex purchased the 9,000 square foot home after pocketing a rumored $100 million from her divorce. And reports are she's planning to build her "dream" house on the lot. But she might consider building it behind steel walls because the masses are fuming after seeing the massive home she tore down. A short story on Yahoo has generated 37,600 comments in 15 hours, many of them from 99 percenters seething at the obvious wastefulness.
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PUT THE FIREHOUSE ON STANDBY: RICKY GERVAIS WILL BE INCENDIARY as host of the upcoming Golden Globes.
The cutthroat comic tells Matt Lauer that he's contractually permitted to be no holds barred for this year's awards ceremony, which airs Sunday, Jan. 15.
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SHE'S CALLED THE "HUMAN BARBIE," BUT SARAH BURGE proves more monstrous than human by giving her seven-year-old daughter a voucher for Christmas for future liposuction.
"She asks for surgery all the time,'' Burge told the British tabloid "Closer of her daughter, Poppy.
Check out "Barbie To Get New Plastic Friends: The Kardashian Sisters!"
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DEM LOVEBIRDS NEED YOUR PRAYERS: Mrs. Nick Cannon has tweeted that her husband Nick is hospitalized for "mild kidney failure."
The Glitter singer tweeted a a photo of herself laying beside Cannon in a hospital room in Aspen, Colo. where the fun-loving couple were vacationing. Word came late Wednesday that the host of America's Got Talent was being transferred to a Los Angeles hospital.
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MATTEL'S PRETERNATURALLY ENDOWED BARBIE IS GETTING NEW FAKE FRIENDS: US Weekly reports that the famous busty airheads will make their plasticity official when they are sold as Barbie's new BFFS.
Read Human Barbie Turns 7-Year-Old Daughter Into Frankenstein: Promises Her Lipo & Implants.
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THE WEB THREW UP A COLLECTIVE SIGH WHEN NEWS BROKE THAT Katy Perry and Russell Brand were tossing in the towel on their 14-month marriage.
"I can't believe Katy Perry and Russell Brand are getting a divorce,'' tweeted fan Votz Appening at@TeamDirection. "They were so perfect for one another. I no longer have hope."
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ATTENTION MAC FREAKS: still missing your leader, the inimitable Mr. Steve Jobs? Well, if you line up now, you can immortalize him with a Steve Jobs action figure replete with black turtleneck, Levi jeans, New Balance sneaks, glasses and three sets of hands.
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HAPPY 2012, PEOPLE. Now that we've traded holiday decorations for Mayan calendars and Y2K survival gear to prepare for the end of the world as we know it, here's further evidence: Rupert Murdoch is trying to join the human race on Twitter.
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WHAT KIND OF RANDY SKANK IS Brandi Glanville?
The divorced "Real" Housewife decided to pull a Britney and wed a friend. No, no flashing of vajayjays.
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DESPITE FAME AND FORTUNE, KATY PERRY AND RUSSELL BRAND COULDN'T PUT THEIR PRETTY LITTLE HEADS TOGETHER TO MAKE THINGS WORK BETWEEN THEM. Instead, they just knocked heads -- about her partying and his hunger for having babies now, according to the Daily Mail.
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MAYBE SHE SHOULD HAVE STUCK TO KISSING GIRLS: Katy Perry and Russell Brand are divorcing just 14 months after marrying in an over-the-top ceremony inside an Indian tiger reserve.
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YVETTE PRIETO MUST BE ONE FIERCE BITCH BEAUTY TO SNARE ONE OF THE best playas of all time, and I'm not just talking about b-ball.
The Cuban model with the megawatt smile became engaged to the Chicago Bulls legend over the weekend, according to WCNC in Charlotte. The two were reportedly celebrating their engagement on a yacht in the French Riviera but a spokesperson denied that claim.
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IS ASHTON KUTCHER TRYING TO HURT DEMI?
The Hollywood pretty boy -- emphasis on the developmentally-arrested "boy" -- has been making a point of being photographed with various women, none of whom have the apparent beauty or grace of his soon-to-be-ex-wife.
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HOLD THE BEDAZZLED iPHONES, FOLKS. Beyonce is said to be delivering her babyonce any second now, in NYC's St. Luke's Roosevelt Hospital.
Yep, the same one where Alicia Keys popped out baby Egypt last year with ill-gotten hubby Swizz Beats. It's going down, people, so place your bets: will the baby diva's first wailing tantrum go double or triple platinum?
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AFTER SEVEN HOURS AND 16 DAYS, SINEAD O'CONNOR'S TAKEN HER LOVE AWAY. The tempetuous Irish songtress has tossed aside her fourth husband Barry Herridge after marrying in a pink Cadillac in a Las Vegas drive-through chapel on Dec. 8. She says she's doing it for love.
"I had for reasons u will all understand, wished to keep this private but have been told today it is to be leaked in the next few days despite my best efforts," O'Connor wrote on her blog yesterday. "So I must now leak it myself so as the record is straight."
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VRROOOM, VRROOOM, JUSTIN BIEBER SURE IS FLY. He gave a childhood friend a badass white Mustang with a black convertible top.
"Justin got me a present. #swag!!!,'' tweeted Ryan Butler, 17.
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BREAK OUT THE POT AND BONGOS! Matthew McConaughey has popped the question to his baby momma Camila Alves. "Just asked Camila to marry me, #MerryChristmas," McConaughey tweeted yesterday as well as sharing a snapshot of the two kissing. But it was a case of putting the cart before the horse: the couple have been together for five years and have two children: Levi, 3 and Vida, 23 months.
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LEO DICAPRIO ADDS ANOTHER MODEL'S SNATCH TO HIS BEDPOST. Ryan Reynolds takes Blake Lively home to meet the parents. And Kim Kardashian wants to help Kobe Bryant ...rebound from divorce? Today's love celebrity style wishes you a ho-ho-ho merry Christmas.
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WHAT HAPPENS WHEN ONE HALF OF A GRIFTER COUPLE FALLS IN LOVE with a rock star and runs away? All the juice gets spilled.
Newly minted cuckold Tareq Salahi tells the Huffington Post that his wife Michaele is a noted liar who lies about everything.
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A HUNDRED DOLLARS SAYS IT TAKES ABOUT 18 MONTHS before some party girl sues Ashton Kutcher for paternity.
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FAKE ID CHARGES? Isn't Joe Giudice a little old to get busted for something underage kids do?
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ARE ON-AGAIN, OF-AGAIN COUPLE JUSTIN TIMBERLANE AND JESSICA BIEL actually engaged? Seems all signs point to yes.
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TROY STRATOS' GOAL WAS AS CLEAR AS THE PRETTY ON HIS FACE. The accused conman's "highest" aim was making "sure that the life he lives is as far from ordinary as he can manage," he boasted on his personal website.
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WORD ON THE TABLOID STREETS IS HIP HOP IMPRESARIO KANYE WEST IS AGAIN COURTING the nearly divorced Kardashian, Kim.
Buzz about the two "boning" was high last January after Kim's sister, Khloe, confirmed that they were seeing each other. Then last week the two were spotted exchanging spit at a Jay-Z concert afterparty, provoking some to speculate about America's future "most hated" celebrity couple.
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A THIRD WALK DOWN THE AISLE IS IN BRITNEY'S FUTURE, FOLKS.
Turns out Ms. Spears'guy Jason Trawick's has been spotted ring shopping all over Malibu, most notably at Tiffany and Harry Winston. As Liz proved, diamonds are a girl's best friend, after all.
And now Us confirms the news: "This is something they've both wanted for a long time," says a source. "It's a way to cement their family. They're both extremely happy and can't wait to become man and wife." The couple will reportedly celebrate the news in Las Vegas this weekend.
BritBrit herself hinted at the news when she tweeted this morning: "OMG. Last night Jason surprised me with the one gift I've been waiting for. Can't wait to show you! SO SO SO excited!!!! Xxo."
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TV STANDARDS REALLY HAVE FALLEN TO A NEW LOW: Howard Stern is joining the judging panel of America's Got Talent.
The shock jock will join Simon Cowell's prime-time talent show next spring while continuing to do his SiriusXM Satellite radio program.
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WHAT BECOMES A LEGEND MOST? A dead Hollywood superstar whose jewels rival those of royals.
Even in death, Elizabeth Taylor dazzles: an auction last night in Manhattan of 80 of her most spectacular pieces of jewelry brought in a record-breaking $116 million -- more than double the amount reached previously for a single collection. "It's one of the most extraordinary auctions that Christie's has ever had and a testament to the affection for Elizabeth Taylor worldwide," Christie's Chairman Marc Porter told the New York Post.
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ASHTON KUTCHER DECLINES A NEW YEAR'S INVITE FROM Lea Michele. Katie Couric's split from younger beau Brooks Perlin is called "inevitable." And Angelina Jolie waxes poetic again Brad just in time for her directorial debut in The Land Of Blood And Honey. Today's love celebrity style can't commit.
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THE HOITY TOITY AND HIGH ALMIGHTLY WILL DESCEND ON CHRISTIE'S IN MANHATTAN TONIGHT AS 80 OF THE FINEST PIECES IN ELIZABETH TAYLOR'S JEWELRY COLLECTION will be auctioned off.
Dubbed "The Legendary Jewels," the collection encompasses the best of the best of some 1,200 pieces of jewelry the Hollywood star amassed over her lifetime. It includes a 33.19 carat rectangular-cut diamond gifted to her Richard Burton that is expected to sell for as much as $3.5 million; a 19th century diamond Tiara gifted to her by her third husband, Mike Todd; and an enamel and gold flag necklace by Bulgari that is expected to sell for as little as $8,000.
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ALEC BALDWIN TOOK ON THE FAUX PERSONA OF AMERICAN AIRLINES CAPT. STEVE ROGERS on Saturday Night Live to apologize to himself for getting kicked off a flight last Tuesday.
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DID YOU CATCH KRIS HUMPHRIES ON GOOD MORNING AMERICA YESTERDAY? That dude came off smooth as creamy peanut butter. Of course, peanut butter only gets that way after being pummeled into paste.
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SCOUT LARUE WILLIS makes her pop culture debut in a contrived production that shows off her cheeky side.
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SHE DOESN'T NEED RAW MEAT DRESSES OR shocking pink tresses to command attention: All Adele has to do is open her mouth and roar raw emotion.
The 23-year-old British songstress has been stealing thunder all year long from pop music's reigning princesses. And she's done it without schlock gimmicks and on the merits of pure, irrepressible talent.
Today the singer made music history by becoming the first woman to top Billboard's 200 Album chart for 21, the Hot 100 song chart for Rolling in the Deep and the Top Artists chart in the same year -- culminating in Billboard naming her "Artist Of the Year."
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BY NOW KRIS HUMPHRIES must be looking for a hole to hide in, somewhere we can he dump his clothes on the floor without hearing his whiny neat freak of a wife complain. DIY Network is on the job!
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JIGGA MAN HAS JOINED AN ELITE ALUM OF RAPPERS with college courses devoted entirely to their work.
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LIKE EVERY RED-BLOODED AMERICAN WHO SPENDS MORE THAN FIVE MINUTES in a court of law, Amanda Knox is shopping for a book deal.
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KOURTNEY KARDASHIAN'S baby daddy must have been traumatized last week [as we were] after witnessing on Kourtney & Kim Take New York his crackpot girlfriend ooze anal discharge on the bed shared by Kim and her temporary tool, Kris Humphries.
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GUY RITCHIE DOES NOT REGRET HIS SOAP OPERA MARRIAGE TO MADONNA. Anne Hathaway promises her hand in marriage --again. And Kris Humphries is shocked, shocked! at his cad portrayal in Kimmy Kardashian's reality TV show. Today's Love Celebrity Style is a rollercoaster.
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STANDING TALL ON CHICAGO'S MAGNIFICENT MILE IS A STATUE OF one of the United States' most iconic movie stars. The young blonde teasingly holds down her infamous white dress in a losing battle with a gust of air: a larger-than-life Marilyn Monroe.
But a much more human Monroe is on display in My Week With Marilyn, a poignant new film based on British filmmaker Colin Clark's relationship with the screen star while working as an assistant director for Laurence Olivier's The Prince & The Showgirl in 1957.
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A FAMOUS SOUTHERN TRUE CRIME AUTHOR once summed up being married this way to me: All you do is sit around and listen to each other fart. That was 20 years ago and Wikipedia informs that he's still married to the same woman, which means they've endured an awful lot of bad smells over the years.
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OOOH, I LOVE IT WHEN FAKE BITCHES get exposed for being fake.
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WHAT DO SCROOGE McDUCK, RICHIE RICH, MR. BURNS AND RAP MOGUL JAY-Z HAVE IN COMMON? An aversion to sharing -- if the the totem pole sculpture created by media whore and American sculptor extraordinaire Daniel Edwards is any indication.
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IF COURTNEY LOVE FLIPS THE BIRD AND STORMS OFFSTAGE WHEN A concertgoer waves a photo of her dead husband at her, what must she do when she looks into her estranged daughter's face?
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KIM KARDASHIAN'S BOOTY WAS THE BUTT OF "FAT" JOKES by Kris Humphries. Justin Bieber could teach Kris lessons in how to treat his lady loves -- as well as any lying, conniving hos that cross his path. And self-lover Kate Gosselin gets her smooth on. Today's love American style is righting wrongs and seeking revenge.
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THE GOOD THAT'LL COME FROM REOPENING THE INVESTIGATION into Natalie Wood's mysterious murder death is that her estate might rake in a few more dollars. 'Cause it's doubtful the query's outcome will end any differently than it did 30 years ago.
As CBS prepares to air its hour on enduring Hollywood mysteries, the Los Angeles County Sheriff's Department says it will revisit Wood's 1981 death based on statements by the captain of the Splendour from which Wood fell and drowned. And now a second witness claims she heard a woman crying for help the night Wood died. The glamorous star's death made headlines and provoked whispered speculation that she was a victim of foul play.
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THE COOL KIDS AND THE BEAUTIFULS converged in Los Angeles last night to celebrate the 2011 American Music Awards. Kanye must have been apoplectic 'cause that sneaky coquette Taylor Swift won for Artist Of The Year, Best Country Female Artist and Best Country Album for Speak Now. The night's prizes brings to 10 the number of AMA awards collected by the 21-year-old performer.
The night's other top prize winner was Adele, who bagged awards for Best Adult Contemporary Artist, Best Pop/Rock Female, and Best Pop/Rock Album for 21. She was unable to attend because she's recovering from surgery on her vocal chords.
Nicki Minaj won for Best Rap/Hip-Hop Artist and Best Rap/Hip-Hop Album for Pink Friday. "There's so much love in this room," she cooed her thanks. And Katy Perry took him a Special Achievement award.
The full list of winners at the jump.
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LIKE FANS OF RYAN GOSLING, SOMETHING ABOUT BRADLEY COOPER RUBS Stephen Colbert the wrong way. The TV satirist takes aim at People magazine for anointing Cooper 2011's Sexiest Man Of The Year. "Sexy, please?,'' snorts Colbert.
"Is that a man or did a horse take a dump in a wig factory?"
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JUST AS DEMI MOORE ANNOUNCES SHE'S THROWING ASHTON KUTCHER OVERBOARD, along comes the reopening of the mysterious death of actress Natalie Wood 30 years ago on the 55-foot yacht Splendor.
Moore, 49, made it official: she's divorcing Kutcher after tabloid reports outed him for raw dogging it with some dumb blonde partygirl. It's sad news because even blind people could see that Demi was totally smitten with the user.
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IMAY BE SHOWING MY AGE, BUT WHEN I WAS 11, among kid stars, Kim Richards was the shit.
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THE SITCH IS SUING THE FITCH!
Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino of Jersey Shore fame is suing clothier Abercrombie & Fitch for illegally profiting off his name.
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THE HAIRS ON THE NECKS OF COLLECTIVE HOLLYWOOD are quaking: Ricky Gervais is back!
The comic who cuts just below the stratum corneum returns to host his third consecutive Golden Globes Awards on Jan. 15, 2012.
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SHE WAS ONCE CONSIDERED THE FAIREST IN THE LAND, but Julia Roberts has never been revered for her acting chops.
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BRAD PITT DOESN'T KNOW, DOESN'T KNOW, DOESN'T KNOW IF HE'LL FATHER MORE BABIES. Kris Humphries has a case of the sads. And Justin Bieber is off the hook for Mariah Yeater's baby. Wednesday's gossip is overwrought with emotion.
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THE C OF E AND ITS IS MINIONS ARE CHUFFED TO BITS about the possibility of Prince "Hot Ginge" Harry and Pippa Middleton, she of the Island's most famous derriere, doing the rumpy pumpy together.
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YOU MEET A MAN. HE'S GOT TATTOOS. You've got tattoes. He's got a reality show. You've got a reality show. (And a wife, but never mind.) You think it's kismet! You fall in love!
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THE SIMULACRUM STAR KIM KARDASHIAN IS THE SUM OF FANTASIES stirred by the mixologists we call 'producers.' Just pour maudlin, add salty tears, shake in shock, a dash of beauty and -- viola! -- here's a Molotov cocktail of emotion. Which sums up most "reality TV" shows, including Keeping Up With The Kardashians.
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NEITHER PUKE NOR POOP NOR POP CAREERS can tame primordial urges. So let's hear three pop princesses reveal the good, the bad and ugly of baby lust.
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IT'S OFFICIAL: KIM KARDASHIAN'S EARLY ABORTED MARRIAGE is the stuff of overwrought Country love songs.
If Saturday Night Live's cutting spoof of the reality star's divorce wasn't proof enough that shame has darkened the house of Kardansia, then check out last night's skewering on the Country Music Awards by Brad Paisley, Carrie Underwood and Modern Family star Eric Stonestreet.
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IF YOU HEARD THE NEWS THAT EARTH'S HUMAN POPULATION just reached 7 billion and thought that the Duggars were somehow to blame, I can confirm they are.
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WEE HARPER SEVEN IS WIDE-EYED AT THE L.A. GALAXY'S playoff game against Real Salt Lake in the Western Conference final Sunday. David Beckham's team won 3-1 and advances to the MLS Cup finals on Nov. 20. The four-month-old doll "looked awestruck by the action on the field,''
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MARIAH YEATER TURNS UP THE HEAT ON JUSTIN BIEBER, appearing on The Insider to repeat her claims that the popster fathered her baby during a backstage quickie at the L.A. Staples Center last year.
Yeater's released photos of herself with the baby, Tristyn Anthony Markhouse Yeater, whose sad eyes seem to know she's already playing him.
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JUSTIN BIEBER IS GONNA MAKE AN EXAMPLE OUT OF MARIAH YEATER TO ALL THE LYING HOS who want to ride the tails of their wannabe celebrity boyfriends.
TMZ reports that Bieber will gift his special sauce to a DNA lab to prove that he didn't father Yeater's four-month-old son.
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OKAY, WE GET IT, KIM KARDASHIAN. You married for love. You got divorced because you fell out of love. All of this was not for the money. Okay.
Your mother even went as far as to return the wedding gift Joy Behar got you and your now ex (it was a blender!) on... The Joy Behar Show. To promote her new book, Kris Jenner and All Things Kardashian. Perfect timing, huh?
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JUSTIN BIEBER DID. NOT. HAVE. SEX. WITH THAT WOMAN. Mariah Yeater. Kris Humphries has a message for his future ex-mother-in-law: he's no Indian giver. And Denise Richards' is back in Richie Sambora's arms. Today's Love Celebrity Style swears temporary allegiance.
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GQ CUDDLES UP TO OUR SNOOKUMS FOR THE JERSEY SHORE GUIDETTE'S MOST PENETRATING INTERVIEW TO DATE. And no that is not a euphemism for her sexcapades.
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THOUGH Teresa Giudice has vehemently denied that her husband Joe has cheated, it looks like Tre's now got reason to believe the rumors. In Touch Weekly reported that Joe -- or as Teresa so lovingly calls him "Juicy Joe" -- was seen at a hotel with a "hot blonde" a few weeks ago.
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OK, I'M NOT MAURY so take this with a grain of salt (and maybe a Walgreens DNA strip). The latest buzz claims that Justin Bieber, 17, knocked up a 19-year-old woman backstage at one of his shows.
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DID JUSTIN BIEBER FATHER A BABY during a backstage concert quickie with a 19-year-old girl? If so, he's fulfilled his wish to become a father by his early 20s.
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DEAR KRIS,
Of course you're smarting after TMZ told you that your klassy wife had filed for divorce. But dry your tears because from where I sit you should fall on your knees, scream Hallejuah! and give thanks for the out.
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THE MARRIAGE LASTED a grand total of 72 days, and just weeks ago E! aired a four-hour special about the wedding.
Did everyone see this coming? Yes. Did Kim really blow $20 million on a wedding that was outlived by some people's pedicures? Yes.
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WELL, THAT WAS QUICK. Married for 72 days. But what else can you expect when your love is consummated in surreality TVland?
So many questions for so short a union:
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OUCH, THAT HURTS! Elisabetta Canalis pays ex-love George Clooney a cutting compliment -- calling him a "father" figure in the new book Questo Amore (This Love), by Italian journalist Bruno Vespa.
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OUR HEARTS GO OUT TO DEMI MOORE AFTER HEARING that ex-hubby Bruce Willis will become a father for the fourth time at age 56.
Willis and his 35-year-old wife Emma Heming Willis will welcome their first child early next year. The couple have been married two years.
Read the full post here.
HERE'S A POP (STAR) QUIZ: What's funnier than Jessica Simpson pretending she's not obviously, heavily pregnant?
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SINCE NOTHING, WE REPEAT, NOTHING ABOUT THE KARDASHIAN-HUMPHRIES affair can be construed as authentic, we advise you to take the latest whispers with a grain of salt too. Not that that'll stop us from repeating them!
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ANOTHER COMMAND PERFORMANCE FOR Lindsay Lohan, aka LiLo, aka Blohan, who was ordered back to jail for violating her probation. She's expected to post $100,000 bail by tonight.
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OF ALL THE SNARK over Ashton Kutcher's costly one-night stand with Sara Leal, the most revealing comment I've read comes from Tom A. over at TheDirty:
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BEING A REALITY TV HOUSEWIFE SEEMS LIKE THE GIFT THAT JUST KEEPS GIVING. And no, we're not talking STDs.
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WE'RE GUESSING SARA LEWD GOT HER PRICE 'CAUSE SHE SPILLING TO US about her extramarital romp with Ashton. Except we're pretty sure we should take it with a grain of salty since the girl who texted "I fucked Ashton Kutcher lol" shortly after getting her phone back from his security now claims she was "seduced."
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IT'S BEEN A HELLA WEEK FOR BEYONCE. For the second time in her career, she's been accused of stealing key elements of a dance routine, this time for her new video Countdown. Then in an even odder turn of events the Bootylicious former lead of Destiny's Child is accused of faking her pregnancy.
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KIM KARDASHIAN MARRIES AGAIN! Only this time the fake wedding is televised. Sir Paul McCartney says says says "I Do" for a third time. And Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher practice primal therapy in the woods. Welcome to love celebrity style!
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A SECRET SOURCE WHO REFERS TO DEMI AS "MISS MOORE'' ALLEGEDLY DISHED TO THE Daily Mail that the actress wants out of her marriage to cheating beau toy Ashton Kutcher.
"Miss Moore has been totally humiliated,'' the mystery source reportedly told the British tab. "On Friday, therefore, she consulted a lawyer about getting a divorce. This is a huge and very tough decision for Miss Moore to take. But her trust has been shattered."
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HERE'S JULIA ROBERTS AS THE "SCHIZOPHRENIC" EVIL STEPMOTHER IN director Tarsem Singh's upcoming Snow White remake, whatever crazy that means. (Wait until the mental health experts weigh on his careless use of the word.)
America's once-reigning princess plays a diabolical royal who connives to keep her nemesis (played by Lily Collins) from power. And like most duplicitious snakes, the Robert's Queen wears a brittle smile to hide the rot inside.
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DID A DANCING CEO IN A BUBBLE COAT PUT THE ORDER IN TO KILL TUPAC SHAKUR 15 years ago?
In the just-released Murder Rap: The Untold Story of the Biggie Smalls & Tupac Shakur Investigations, former Los Angeles Police Det. Greg Kading claims that Sean P.Diddy/Puff Daddy/"King of Irrelevant Nicknames" Combs, ordered a hit on Tupac with $1 million dollars as a payout.
This isn't first time that Diddy's been accused of Tupak's murder: Kirk Burrowes, ex-president of Bad Boy Entertainment, made the explosive claim back in 2003.
Read the full post here.
ASHTON KUTCHER GOT NAKED IN A HOTTUB WITH FOUR LADIES LAST SATURDAY BEFORE BEDDING ONE. Liz Hurley lassos notorious playboy Shane Warner into the promise of marriage. And Jason Biggs's wife buys some naughty for his birthday. Sunday's gossip needs to confess for its sins.
Read the full post here.
HERE'S THE SILVER LINING FOR A FORMERLY INKSTAINED REPORTER pretending to be coolatious on the web:
Instead of being forced to actually weed through hundreds of names, I can just repeat that RadarOnline reports that Ashton Kutcher stopped following mrskutcher on Twitter.
Read the full post here.
HARPER BECKHAM IS PROVING TO BE THE LUCKY LITTLE GIRL HER PARENTS HOPED WHEN THEY anointed her with the middle name "Seven."
The infant daughter of David and Victoria Beckham clearly's got her daddy wrapped around her pinky finger as he waxes on about his newborn.
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THEY SAY A PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS, BUT CAN ONE COUNTER A $10 MILLION FAUX PAS?
First Lady Michele Obama was photographed at a Target yesterday in Alexandria, Va. The prez's wife reportedly picked up some dog food for Bo among other things as she explored the aisles for 40 minutes with an assistant. Secret Service agents shadowed her, and an AP photographer conveniently snapped her at the checkout. A spokesman for President Obama claimed the photographer 'caught her' at the store.
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THE DRAGNET FOR ASHTON KUTCHER'S TRICK SARA LEAL IS UNDERWAY.
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ALL RIGHT, FIRST THINGS FIRST: who laughed their asses off when they heard about Nancy Grace's wardrobe malfunction on Dancing With Irrelevant Stars? I think we should all sit around and judge her as harshly as she does everyone else.
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CALL ME A CYNIC BUT THIS WAS INEVITABLE: RadarOnline's dropped a bombshell story (or is it a story about a bombshell?) claiming Ashton Kutcher put his pecker in someone other than Demi Moore Saturday night. And Charlie Sheen is bent over in pain from laughing, amirite?
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DOES JUSTIN BIEBER HAVE A PRIVATE THOUGHT?
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TODD PALIN WANTS TO DUMP THE TEA PARTY'S MRS. PALIN. Michaele Salahi played hide and seek with Steve Tyler at an Aerosmith concert five years ago. And team-switching evangelical minister Ted Haggard has signed up for a stint on Celebrity Wife Swap. Thursday's gossip cheats.
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Reason focuses on the case of Kelly Thomas, a 37-year-old homeless schizophrenic California man who was beaten and tasered so severely by Fullerton, Calif. police in July that he died a few days later. Orange County DA Tony Rackauckas announced today that two officers have been charged with second-degree murder and manslaughter in connection with Thomas' death.
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A HEADLINE SHOUTS THAT THE RATINGS FOR SEASON PREMIER OF TWO AND A HALF MEN grabbed "an all-time high without Sheen." No doubt Charlie Sheen was blasting the idiots and ingrates who missed the nuance.
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POOR TAREQ SALAHI. WHO WILL CRASH WHITE HOUSE PARTIES WITH HIM NOW? With whom will he share his ejeculations?
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CHARLIE SHEEN AND BRAD PITT have some 'splaing to do. Charlie for his crazy antics last spring -- and Pitt for insinuating in a Parade interview that his exwife Jennifer Aniston was boring.
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THERE IS A GOD!
Suicide, bankruptcies, fake kidnappings and now, DISMISSALS! Never a dull day in HousewivesLand.
HuffPo reports that Jill Zarin, Alex McCord and Kelly Bensimon have all been fired from The Real Housewives of New York.
Read the full post here.
THERE'S A REWARD TO THE PUBLIC every time Brangelina premiers a new project.
Before every film release, the fulsome couple invariably give an interview in which they dollop out facts about their A-list family: the boys eat bugs, Shiloh likes boys' clothes, they take time-outs for sex.
Now with the impending release of the new baseball comedy Moneyball, Pitt is once again talking about his failed marriage to Jennifer Aniston, and why making Angelina the mother to his kids is the best gift he could have given them.
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FORGET THE JOBS BILL, the fleeing of Libya's Gadhafi and the famine in Somalia -- Michaele Salahi's been abducted! Or, more accurately, the Salahis have hijacked the headlines again.
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THE FBI IS HOT ON THE TRAIL OF THE HACKED NAKED HOTTIE WHODUNNIT.
In other words, who stole the soft erotica photos of A-lister actress Scarlett Johansson and leaked them on the web?
Read the full post here.
IS BRIT-BRIT ABOUT TO BE BLINGEED? George Clooney wrestles a new love interest. And Jennifer Lopez tests her chemistry with Bradley Cooper. Tuesday's gossip is a love connection.
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GETTING EVISCERATED BY CRUEL WITS HAS HAD A REVELATORY EFFECT ON CHARLIE SHEEN.
During last weekend's roast taped by Comedy Central, comic Hollywood launched its own own torpedo of truth at the notorious party boy with a penchant for porn and rough play with women. No topic was taboo.
"It's amazing," joked actress Kate Walsh from Grey's Anatomy. "Despite all those years of abusing your lungs, your kidneys and your liver, the only thing you've had removed is your kids."
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OH THAT MADGE, SHE THINKS SHE'S HILARIOUS, even when she looks like Anthony Perkin's mother in Psycho. Poor wilted deluded flower.
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IS THERE AN AGE WHEN the mature woman who likes sex with hot boys no longer qualifies for the descriptive "cougar?"
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GUMBY'S A CLUMSY CROOK, MADONNA'S INCREASINGLY SOUNDS like the neighborhood crank, and Monica Lewinsky improbably considers a PR career. Welcome to Whack Wednesday.
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FILE UNDER 'DUH: MADONNA, POP DIVA AND AUTHOR OF The English Roses, has thorns.
A haughty, self-important and loathsome Madonna was caught on video barely making eye contact with a fan who presented her with a large purple hydrangea at the Venice Film Festival.
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PEEKABOO!
The beautifuls Victoria and David Beckham, and Pink & Carey Hart were spotted out by X-17Online paps with their new wee ones. And though I personally share the philosophy that France's First Lady Carla Bruni promises to practice with her as-yet unborn baby (her child will NOT be exploited in the media, thank you very much), I won't begrude the Beckhams and Harts for traveling with babes in tow while going about their business. In fact, once I turn off my internal "child as product placement" alarm, I'm as quick as a Duggar to exclaim, "A baby! How exciting!''
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IN THE INTEREST OF COMEDY AND POLITICAL BALANCE, KATHY GRIFFIN OUGHT TO GO ON TOUR SHADOWING THE MAJOR REPUBLICAN candidates.
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THE WORLD'S FIRST "TRANSGENDERED FATHER" THOMAS BEATIE does not like the word 'no.'
Beatie was born a girl who felt like a boy who neverthless still wanted babies. So Beatie got testosterone shots and grew a beard, but kept his uterus intact.
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I FOR ONE AM GRATEFUL FOR THE SERVICE OF ACTRESS-TURNED-ACTIVIST DARYL HANNAH, who could be living politically obtusely in the lap of luxury as a member of the lucky set rather than getting popped outside the White House.
The Splash and Kill Bill actress has increasingly veered from acting into environmental activism over the last few years.
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WHAT IS IT ABOUT THE VMAs that makes everyone bring out their inner weirdo?
Things are popping off this weird dude I've never seen before...and then I'm like, oh wait, it's Lady Gaga. I didn't recognize her with her dick out, that's all.
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THE UGLY CUSTODY DRAMA BETWEEN Oksana Grigorieva and Mel Gibson is about to close.
"As the result of a multiday settlement conference, the court announces that Mel Gibson and Oksana Grigorieva have achieved a settlement in their ongoing dispute,'' Los Angeles Superior Court officials announced Friday. The terms are to be announced at a hearing next week.
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THREE DAYS AGO NOBODY EVER HEARD OF JIMCARREYTRULIFE.COM. Today the website ranks 90,673 in the world on Alexa.com, an auspicious and audacious debut by the always wildly inventive comic.
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HERE'S THE FULL CREEPTASTIC WINSOME MESSAGE THAT JIM CARREY DELIVERS TO EMMA STONE via YouTube video.
It is a joke? Has he gone raving mad? Wrestling with deep yearn?
Emma Stone herself is scratching her head. "I was a huge Jim Carrey fan,'' she says. "Now I'm not sure if I should be flattered, or seek an order for protection? ;) lol."
Ahh, who cares: it'll amuse you for five minutes and give you something to talk about when you're pouring cream in your coffee in the office kitchen.
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HOLLYWOOD MAY BE THAT VAPID, CORRUPTING CITY ON THE HILL BUT don't get the idea it doesn't have standards. The Hollywood Chamber of Commerce has unequivocally banished reality TV contestants from being honored with a star along the Hollywood Walk Of Fame.
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SO APPARENTLY YESTERDAY'S EAST COAST
EARTHQUAKE fucked with the Washington Monument, and flooded Facebook with inane updates about how Law & Order: SVU reruns were being interrupted.
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AT LAST! SOME DRIP OF NEWS THAT ACTUALLY COMMANDS attention to the Kardashian-Humphries betrothal. Read the full post here.
In the cattiest gossip so far about the fake wedding that dominated the (always slow) weekend news,
OOOPS, SOMEONE'S PLAYED THE ULTIMATE PLAYAS AS Will and Jada Pinkett Smith bat down rumors that the two have separated.
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TOXICOLOGY TESTS ON SOULFUL BRITISH R & B SINGER AMY WINEHOUSE FOUND NO illegal drugs in her body when she died, according to a family statement.
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FOLKS, IF YOU THOUGHT THAT BETTY DRAPER WAS colder than a frozen Botox needle, then listen to what's being said about January Jones.
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LOOKS LIKE THEY'RE TRYING FOR A BOY: Ben Affleck and super mommy Jennifer Garner have announced thev've got a proverbial bun in the oven.
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THE CASE OF THE DISAPPEARING MARILYN MONROE TATTOO HAS BEEN SOLVED: Vapid starlet Megan Fox has confirmed that she's getting her ink of the dead sex symbol removed from her forearm.
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AMERICA'S LOWEST COMMON DENOMINATORS -- fans of the Kardashian klan -- are reveling in the details of the made-for-TV marriage of shallow reality star Kim Kardashian and her hulking hubby, New Jersey Nets forward Kris Humphries.
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EVER SINCE REAL HOUSEWIFE HUBBY RUSSELL ARMSTRONG WAS FOUND HANGED MONDAY IN AN APPARENT SUICIDE, there's been lots of squawking about the evils of reality TV, a claim that I'd never dispute.
Though Russell Armstrong reportedly told friends that appearing on the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills with wife Taylor Armstrong ruined his life, there's little doubt that he was battling demons long before appearing on that show.
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THE IMPENDING NUPTIALS OF Juliana S. Park to Benjamin J. Lee will no doubt be the hottest ticket of Pasadena, Calif.'s fall social calendar for both the living and undead. That's because these two crazy kids are slaying them on the web with their mock engagement photo album depicting a surprise Zombie attack.
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MICHAEL VICK HAS PUT ON A GOOD SHOW of being reformed since being busted for operating a dog-fighting ring. But then maybe he's just had fantastic PR people fixing his problem.
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SO JENNIFER HUDSON IS MORE PROUD TO BE THIN THAN TO BE AN OSCAR WINNER.
Listen, Jen, good on ya for getting your body to a healthier state. But now let's work on the whacked perspective that produced this grade-A line of Californicated bullshit:
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"BEST-SMELLING PERFUME EVER" SANDRA BULLOCK AND RYAN REYNOLDS have been snapped hiking in Wyoming's Grand Teton National Park along with Sandy's son Louis Bardo.
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KEVEN FEDERLINE, AKA K-FED, AKA EX-FED, has delivered his fifth progeny into the world, this time a daughter mothered by former pro volleyball player, Victoria Prince.
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SO I'M AT THE LUNCH TABLE IN THE BREAK ROOM telling a friend how curious I am about the newly announced Real Housewives tour. He suddenly blurts out that one of the housewives husband's committed suicide. "Get the fuck outta here," I say in my best Philly accent.
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GLORIA STEINEM DISMISSES THE TV REALITY STAR KIM KARDASHIAN as an adorning victim of sexism.
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A FLORIDA MAN WAS STILL LOCKED UP THIS MORNING AFTER ABSCONDING WITH A CUTOUT JUSTIN BIEBER from a Bradenton mall Saturday.
David Dowling and an underaged friend were popped after they snatched the lifesized Biebs inside an F.Y.E. store and then ran with it through a Sears, according to the Manatee County Sheriff's Department.
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PITY THE ACTRESS WHO ONLY WANTS ACCLAIM for talent and gets swept up in fame.
Kristen Stewart's been wrestling that demon ever since being propelled into supernova stratosphere as the conflicted Bella in the Twilight vampire series.
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ARE YOU GUYS PLANNING TO WATCH NBC's The Playboy Club this fall? Because Gloria Steinem's not. And I can't say I blame her.
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THE VOTES HAVE BEEN CAST AND THE WINNERS ARE IN: ALL THREE JUDGES FROM LAST YEAR'S AMERICAN IDOL WILL RETURN TO THE HITMAKING TV SHOW FOR ITS 11TH SEASON.
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WHO WAS THE MYSTERY BLONDE CAUGHT FRENCH-KISSING ELVIS IN A 1956 PHOTOGRAPH? THAT enduring mystery has finally been solved by Vanity Fair's Alanna Nash, who reveals 75-year-old Barbara Gray to be the busser.
Read the full post here.
ONCE AGAIN David and Victoria Beckham are sharing their joy over newborn baby smell on Twitter.
The famously fashionable Mrs. Beckham tweeted her second picture of her angelic baby girl Harper staring straight into the camera with her head on her daddy's chest.
Read the full post here.
LAUREN AMBROSE WAS FUNNY AS THE WISECRACKING, Hearst-driving, sometimes-funereal teenage star of HBO's Six Feet Under. Now she becomes the Funny Girl.
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IS THERE TROUBLE IN PARADISE?
Jennifer Aniston and new beau Justin Theroux have been snapped looking glum in recent photographs together.
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WOW, LILO CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF THAT sweet, sweet commercial money. And looks like advertisers can't get enough of her either.
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YOU'D THINK Britney "Involuntary Hold 5150" Spears would know better than the average basket case to thrust a three-year-old in the spotlight, shine it on the web and then cheer loudly when the lights go out.
But families perpetuating the sins of parents is what keeps shrinks in business after all.
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HA! How prescient of Crabby to mention Kat Von D getting a tattoo of Jesse's name.
Girlfriend did much better than that. She got his 10-year-old likeness inked on her body instead. Under her left armpit. Thank God, so she won't have to really see it. But who does that?
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FIRST UP, LET'S TALK ABOUT MARIAH CAREY'S HSN appearance. DID YOU GUYS SEEEEEE THAT? Oh my God. It's magical.
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POP PRINCESS KATY PERRY appears Sunday night at the premiere of the Smurfs in 3D which opens this weekend.
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LET'S HOPE SHE DIDN'T GET HIS NAME TATTOOED ON HER: THE seriously besotted Kat Von D. has confirmed that her romance with professional bad boy Jesse James is kaput.
(Seriously, WTF were his parents thinking when they named him Jesse James?
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AMY WINEHOUSE, THE TROUBLED BRITISH BLUESY SINGER who wrestled with addictions and mental illness, was found dead in her London flat today. She was 27.
Read the full post here.
IT HAS THE BEST OF TABLOID NEWS: CELEBRITY, SCANDAL AND IRONY IN FULL-PAGE COLOR.
But the Rebecca Black parody of Friday which spoofs the hacking scandal that's rocked Rupert Murdoch's world one-ups the tabs in at least one way: it has a catchy beat that you can dance to.
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LINDSAY LOHAN'S GOT A CASHFLOW PROBLEM that's keeping her away from the shrink (but not away from the shoe store).
Wearing Christian Louboutin Madame Butterfly heels, currently listed for $1,490 on eBay (but can be had for as little as $361), the once-promising starlet pleaded poor at a routine hearing Thursday.
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HE'S THE CRAGGY-FACED NEWSMAKING REPTILIAN WHO BUYS AND BULLIES HIS WAY TO WINNING AT CAPITALISM. She's the steely Chinese-born Tiger Wife raised as a Communist who's clawed her way to wealth and power.
Who else could we be talking about other than K. Rupert Murdoch, titan of the News Corp. and his third wife, the ferocious 42-year-old Wendi Deng, who's married up three times.
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THE SECURITY GUARD WHO ACCUSING BRITNEY SPEARS OF BEING A TEASING HO NOWS ADDS 'SKANK' TO HIS CHARGES.
Read the full post here.
SO GET THIS, YOU GUYS:
Apparently Michele Bachmann that's so bad, she can't function. Not only do I love the fact that she blames high heels, which SHE WEARS ALL THE TIME, but that she gets this headache once a week.
Read the full post here.
THE VERY MODEST AND DOWN-TO-EARTH MATT DAMON SPOKE ADORABLY ABOUT HIS POOR RICH FRIENDS WHOM HE SAYS ARE imprisoned by fame.
"I have friends who are like prisoners,'' Damon mused on German television Tele 5. "Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, for instance. They can't just go someplace. If they go for a walk, it turns into an international incident."
Read the full post here.
RADIO'S REVELATORY POWERS BROADCASTED LOUDLY YESTERDAY WHEN LADY GAGA PAID Howard Stern a visit to his studio.
In a revealing interview that spans 88 minutes, the pop diva reveals a touching love for her father, admits to eating issues, urges teen girls to hold off having sex, and says that used cocaine because it "made me feel I had a friend." Listen to it inside.
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HATERS ARE GONNA HAVE A FIELD DAY: Rebecca Black's new formulaic video hits the Internet today.
Read the full post here.
THEY'RE GORGEOUS, RICH AND TALENTED, but that wasn't enough to keep Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony happy together.
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THE GLAMOROUS BECKHAMS ARE GOING GAGA OVER BABY NO. 4, a little girl named Harper Seven. And, in turn, the media are giddy about the first photographs of the girl that the couple have released on Twitter.
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ELIN NORDEGREN HAS RECOVERED NICELY FROM THE MORTIFYING EMBARASSMENT of her ex-husband's extra-curricular affairs. The former Mrs. Tiger Woods has apparently captured the attentions of Jamie Dingman, the son of American billionaire businessman Michael Dingman.
"He's never been so happy,'' the New York Post quotes a source (and we'll keep our fingers crossed that the info wasn't overheard in a tapped phone call).
"He and Elin have strong feelings for each other. He's a classic all-American guy. He's handsome, a total gentleman and low-key. He's never been in the press. Elin's a very lucky girl; he's a great guy but very private."
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JUST IN TIME FOR WHACK WEDNESDAY COMES THE ULTIMATE WHACK: BRAD PITT AND ANGELINA ARE GETTING MARRIED.
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JUST ABOUT NOW, JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE IS SNACKING ON HIS WORDS. The pop star publicly shamed Mila Kunis into accepting a date from U.S. Sgt. Scott Moore to the Marine Ball Corps in Greenville, N.C. later this year. "Do it for your country," Timberlake pressed when he overheard Kunis being quizzed about the invite by a reporter while the two stars were promoting their upcoming movie, Friends With Benefits.
Read the full post here.
HERE'S A MESSAGE TO LADY GAGA FROM THE COTTON CANDIED QUEEN OF POP, KATY PERRY: Anything you can do I can do better.
Read the full post here.
FASHIONISTAS EVERYWHERE are thrilling at the news that the world will soon hear the pitter patter of tiny steps following trendsetter Posh Beckham.
Victoria and David happily delivered the news today of the birth of their fourth child but first daughter, named Harper Seven Beckham.
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IT'S HARD TO IMAGINE A MORE THOUGHTFUL AND CONSCIENTIOUS JUROR THAN THAT OF JENNIFER FORD, AKA "JUROR NO. 3" who served on the Casey Anthony murder trial.
Ford shares insights into the jury's reasoning, and reacts to public outrage over its "not guilty" verdict, in an in interview with ABC's Terry Moran. The full interview is transcribed below.
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THE WEEK FEELS LONG AND IT'S ONLY WEDNESDAY. LET'S RECAP THE WILD AND CRAZY SO FAR:
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A FRENCH NEWSPAPER IS REPORTING THAT THE NEW WIFE OF MONACO'S PRINCE ALBERT TRIED UNSUCCESSFULLY THREE TIMES TO DITCH THE WEDDING.
Read the full post here.
CRUELTY IS STANDARD PRACTICE IN PIG PRODUCTION, and the video just released by the advocacy group Mercy for Animals proves it.
The nauseating video, which depicts workers slamming sick piglets to the ground for quick killing, and being castrated or "docked" without anesthesia, was shot by a worker who deliberately sought work at Iowa Select Farms.
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NOT TO BE OUTDONE BY HER ROYAL SISTER, PIPPA MIDDLETON TURNED HEADS WHEN SHE SHOWED UP AT WIMBLEDON TODAY with her rumoured(spelled the British style in her honor) ex-beau Alex Loudon.
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NEWLYWEDS KATE AND WILLS TOOK IN THE GAME AT WIMBLEDON TODAY IN LONDON.
The young Royals, in London ahead of their 11-day-trip to North America, attended the fourth match between tennis player Andy Murray and Richard Gasquet of France.
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A NEW YORK MAN IS BLAMING JERRY SEINFELD'S CRITICALLY SKEWERED SERIES The Married Ref for busting up his marriage.
Howie Kohlenberg, 47, claims after he and Christine Kohlenberg appeared as a bickering couple on the show's debut March 4, 2010 episode, his wife became obsessed with becoming a reality TV star.
Read the full post here.
PHOTOGRAPHER TERRY RICHARDSON RELEASED A CANDID snap on his blog of Jennifer Aniston with her new beaux Justin Theroux after the three shared dinner in Soho.
The black and white photo shows a glowing Jen leaning into a beaming Theroux who's got his arm wrapped around her. It's the kind of still that stays on the nightstand for a lifetime. No doubt Jen has her fingers crossed.
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I DONT' KNOW WHY, BUT I WATCHED BRITNEY'S NEW VIDEO, "I Wanna Go."
Everyone's shatting their drawers about all the pop culture references and how clever it all is, but let's get serious here.
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TURNS OUT THAT THE AUDICIOUSLY UTTERED "I WILL BE MARRIED" SOMEDAY REMARK THAT Elisabetta Canalis tossed to a reporter was an ultimatum in disguise. And looks like George Clooney wasn't biting.
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THE WEDDING'S BARELY TWO MONTHS GONE BUT BRITAIN'S ROYAL FAMILY COULD TRAVEL TO THE MOON AND BACK WITH THE FUEL THEY'VE GOTTEN FROM PRINCESS KATE.
Perfectly coiffed, not a hair out of place, not a pinch of cellulite captured on camera -- so far the new princess is wearing well on the public.
"Trusty" Kate is the perfect tool to help mend the royals' image after its devastating treatment toward Diana, who would turn be turning 51 on July 1 if she were still alive.
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QUICK! SOMEBODY HIRE RICHARD JAMES VERONE TO CONCOCT WINNING VIRAL MARKETING CAMPAIGNS. This guy is a genius.
Verone, 59, was tired of being tired, in pain, with ruptured discs in his back, an undiagnosed protuberance in his chest, a sore foot and a raging case of dermatitis. (Okay, he suffers that last affliction in silence.)
But Verone didn't have any health insurance. And when he investigated getting coverage from Medicare, he found out he didn't qualify. A dark realization dawned on him: he'd get better health care if he were a criminal. So Verone became one.
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HERE'S A BARE-CHESTED TOM CRUISE LOOKING WHAT THE KIDDIES CALL 'BEAST' -- AND THAT'S A GOOD THING -- in the upcoming screen remake of Broadway's Rock Of Ages.
Read the full post here.
JENNIFER ANISTON'S SKETCHY JUDGMENT IN MEN STRIKES AGAIN.
Read the full post here.
WHY BUY THE OLD HEFNER WHEN YOU CAN JUST MILK HIM?
Crystal Harris has dumped Playboy founder Hugh Hefner just five days before their planned wedding -- but not before appearing on the cover of the magazine as "America's Princess."
Read the full post here.
SEXY KIM CATTRALL BEMOANS HOLLYWOOD'S LACK OF INTEREST IN WOMEN OVER 50 BUT SHE'S keeping a sense of humor about it.
"Directors here aren't interested in us,'' the former chief Sex In The City tart tells PopEater. " We have to go out there and make them for ourselves which is what I did with Monica Velour.
Read the full post here.
A HEARTY MAZEL TOV GOES OUT TO NATALIE PORTMAN, WHO DELIVERED HER FIRST CHILD, A SON, YESTERDAY. The baby boy's name has not yet been revealed.
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MILDRED BAENA TOOK THE CASH AND GAVE HELLO! AN INTERVIEW REVEALING HOW MARIA SHRIVER LEARNED HER HUSBAND WAS THE FATHER OF THE MAID'S LOVE CHILD.
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THE LATEST FICTION ABOUT ''EARTH MOTHER'' ANGELINA JOLIE IS THAT SHE'S A NATURALLY COLORED CREATURE FROM THE LAGOON.
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KELSEY GRAMMER GUSHED ABOUT HIS NEW AND IMPROVED WIFE TO REPORTERS BEFORE THE TONY AWARDS AT NEW YORK'S BEACON THEATER SUNDAY NIGHT.
Grammer's wife is bride number four, Kayte Walsh, whom he married just days after his marriage to Camille Grammer dissolved last December.
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FIVE, FOUR, THREE, TWO...
The countdown to the inevitable and overdue backlash against the planet's most famous derriere, Pippa Middleton, begins now.
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EVERY WOMAN KNOWS THAT IF YOU'RE LUCKY ENOUGH TO RUB UP ON GEORGE CLOONEY, you should just enjoy the ride while it lasts. Italian hottie Elisabetta Canalis has been the lucky lady for the past two years, but her days as the most envied woman in the world may be numbered.
Canalis told Italian magazine Chi that she wouldn't be with someone who didn't want to get married and have kids. Umm, does she know who she's dating?
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SOMETIMES THE WEB IS ONE BIG RACE TO "FIRST," which is often confused with being cool and or winning.
I admit it: I'm not cool. For instance, I have yet to write a word on that weiner Anthony Weiner, and ever since my sex columnist graduated to grad school (shout out to Avoine!), there's been scant gratuitous coitus in these parts.
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WEARING NOTHING BUT PASTIES, A MESH BODY SUIT AND PRONGED THONG, LADY GAGA IS ESCORTED INTO NEW YORK'S BOOM BOOM ROOM. And, no, that is not a euphemism for the crazy bin. Although it could be.
The fame monster stripped down to celebrate winning the Fashion Icon Award at the Council of Fashion Designers of America's 2011 Awards. The awards ceremony was held last night at the Lincoln Center in New York. CNN's Anderson Cooper hosted the fete.
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HONESTLY, AT THIS POINT I THINK JENNIFER ANISTON WOULD BE BETTER OFF BEING A "LONELY CAT LADY SUCKING CHEEZ WHIZ STRAIGHT FROM A CAN." Because then we'd be safe from hearing every tedious detail about her so-called love life.
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WHAT WOULD FICTIONAL SHRINK FRAZIER CRANE CALL KELSEY GRAMMER IF HE WERE TREATING HIM AS A PATIENT? Our guess is 'creep.'
That's because in his custody battle with his ex-wife Camille, Grammer's lawyer has written a letter expressing the actor's interest in having primary custody of his son but not his daughter.
Camille filed papers June 2 in Los Angeles seeking full custody of both children.
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GIRL ROCKER PINK IS …IN THE PINK. The fierce Philly songtress has given birth to a baby girl she's named Willow Sage Hart.
"We are ecstatic to welcome our beautiful healthy happy baby girl, Willow Sage Hart," Pink tweeted on Thursday.
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SHIA LABEOUF PONTIFICATES ON HOW THE PRODUCTION SET WAS TRANSFORMED WHEN MEGAN FOX'S REPLACEMENT JOINED THE CAST OF Michael Bay's latest sci fi dystopia.
"It’s a different female energy than he experienced with Mikaela, who was a very cold biker chick,' LaBeouf tells the Los Angeles Times 'about Fox's character in Bay's first two Transformer movies.
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LOVER BOY LEO DICAPRIO IS REPORTEDLY CANOODLING WITH TV STARLET BLAKELY LIVELY.
Fresh from his on-and-off romance with model Bar Rafaeli, the A-list actor has been spotted wooing the Gossip Girl around the French Riviera.
Read the full post here.
WAS JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE WEARING HIS GAME FACE WHEN HE TALKED ABOUT HIS EX RECENTLY?
The singer cracked open to Vanity Fair about his longtime love Jessica Biel, calling her the "single-handedly most significant person in my life."
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LOOKING EVERY BIT LIKE JET-SETTING ENTITLEDS, PRINCE WILLIAM AND CATHERINE MIDDLE GRACE THE COVER OF THE JULY ISSUE OF VANITY FAIR.
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I SMELL SYNERGY!
News events force me to type two words I never imagined uttering: Kim Kardashian. Yet the buzz about her $2 million emerald cut engagement ring is so loud I can't ignore the clamor.
The dark-haired beauty who's famous for nothing except being famous has sold herself to the highest bidder!
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WHILE ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER BLASTS REPORTS IN THE National Enquirer that he misused his security detail while California's governor, his estranged wife Maria Shriver has been spotted hanging out with Oprah in Chicago.
"Today's story from the National Enquirer is totally and completely false," the actor's lawyer said in a statement.
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THE RIP IN MARIA SHRIVER'S MARRIAGE CAME AFTER SHE POINT BLANK asked her housekeeper if Arnold Schwarzenegger was her son's father.
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OH WHAT A CLEVER PRINCESS.
After her over-the-top mauve fascinator became a favorite target among web's commentariat, Princess Beatrice figured out a way to get the last laugh: yesterday the forbidding headpiece she wore to the wedding of Prince William and Catherine Middleton was sold on eBay for a whopping $132,000.
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I'M BAAACK! Sorry for my absence but there seemed little point in yapping about the news when it was all supposed to go to hell within hours.
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AN ALPHABET SOUP OF STARS TURNED UP IN CHICAGO FOR THE GRANDEST GOING-AWAY PARTY OF THEM ALL: Oprah's shuttering of her TV show.
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THE BEAUTY-OBSESSED MOM WHO INJECT HER 8-YEAR-OLD DAUGHTER'S FACE WITH BOTOX IS NOW BEGGING FOR FORGIVENESS.
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CALL HIM THE SPERMINATOR.
Voracious news consumers just got a tasty treat served by The Ahnald and his estranged Mrs. If it weren't so sad it'd be a helluva an amusement. Okay, it's a helluva "tail," get it? Yuck, yuck.
The national conversation has erupted with jokes about the twisted tale that involves not one but two rumored love children.
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THE SAN FRANCISCO MOTHER WHO INJECTS HER 8-YEAR-OLD DAUGHTER BOTOX IS BEING INVESTIGATED BY CHILD WELFARE AUTHORITIES.
Kerry Campbell revealed on ABC's Good Morning America that she was injecting Botox into her daughter's face to eliminate wrinkles. She says all the pageant moms are doing it, and that an anonymous doctor is her secret source of the neurotoxin used for smoothing facial lines.
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A DAY THAT OTHERS FEAR -- I EMBRACE.
In fact, 13's my lucky number. Because I don't have a choice: I was born on Friday the 13th.
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TOUCHE, PRINCESS BEATRICE!
Prince Andrew's fashion-challenged daughter became a worldwide laughingstock when she wore a madcap fascinator to her cousin William's royal wedding.
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THE ANNOUNCEMENT IS A MERE 24 HOURS OLD BUT THE SPIN HAS ALREADY BEGUN.
Maria Shriver was "miserable" in her marriage to Arnold Schwarzenegger. It's all about the Govinator's "craziness," a source tells TMZ.
The high-profile couple merged political dynasty with Hollywood muscle when they married 25 years ago. But neither privilege nor wealth was enough to keep the marriage thriving.
The scuttlebutt is that Maria moved out of the family's home months ago, which sounds suspiciously when Scharzenegger wrapped up his term as California governor.
While the Govinator has already lined up a return to movies, Maria lamented on YouTube about the angst of not knowing what comes next in her life.
Apparently even celebrities can't escape existential pain.
FOURTEEN YEARS AFTER SHE DIED IN A CAR CRASH IN A PARIS TUNNEL, and just weeks after the British Monarchy produced a spectacularly dazzling wedding, a new film debuts this week at Cannes that implicates the Royal family in the death of Princess Diana.
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BRITNEY PALIN ONCE AGAIN PROVES TEEN PREGNANCY IS THE GIFT THAT KEEPS ON DELIVERING -- AS LONG AS YOUR MOMMY'S A REPUBLICAN LEADER.
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IT'S HARD TO BELIEVE THAT EX-SPOUSE JESSE JAMES COULD BECOME A BIGGER EMBARASSMENT FOR SANDRA BULLOCK, BUT THE MAN'S GOT TALENT.
A year after being outed as a serial cheater during his marriage to the A-list star, James reveals to sex secrets muckracker Howard Stern that sex with fiance Kat Von D is "100 percent" better than it was with America's sweetheart.
"She's a vixen," James oozed about the L.A. Ink star on Sterns' Sirius XM radio show. "The way she gets in my head and makes me feel. It's a mental thing. We're just connected on a whole different level."
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STARS ALIGHTED UPON L.A.'S BUTTERFLY BAR SATURDAY TO THROW A BABY SHOWER FOR THE VERY POSH VICTORIA BECKHAM.
Hosted by Eva Longoria and Ken Paves, the pink fete atop Hotel Le Petit Ermitage was in honor of the impending first female child conceived by Mr. and Mrs. Beckham. Together the comely couple have three boys and the former Spice Girl had given up hope of having a tiny fashionista to follow in her footsteps.
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Read the full post here. IF YOU'RE A FAN OF CELEBRITY SEX TAPES, you know who to thank for starting it all:
Rob Lowe.May 04, 2011
PHOTOS CIRCULATING SUPPOSEDLY DEPICTING A DEAD OSAMA BIN LADEN are fake, according to a report by MSNBC.
Authorities are considering when and if to release the real photos, "if only to convince die-hard Bin Laden followers," according to the Los Angels Times.
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THOUGH TOO SHORT FOR OUR FANTASIES, the kiss that Catherine Elizabeth shared with Prince William on the balcony of Buckingham Palace will last a lifetime: A still photo is eternal.
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THE PRETERNATURAL COOL WITH WHICH CATHERINE ELIZABETH BECAME PRINCESS BORDERS ON UNNERVING.
Not a hint of nerves rattles the image of Catherine proceeding down the aisle in Westminster Abbey. She sits straighter, appears more poised than the princely man next to her who was born into the pomp.
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CATHERINE ELIZABETH MIDDLETON STEPS OUT OF THE LIMO THAT DELIVERS HER TO DESTINY AND REVEALS THE UP-TO-NOW STATE SECRET: Sarah Burton of Alexander McQueen designed the wedding gown.
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TShe wears a perpetual smile on her face, wears clothing of classic lines and colors in the epitome of taste.
She is schooled, connected, polished, the handsome feminine form of great fortune and fate.
She is a commoner but with a regal air -- the better to serve Catherine Elizabeth Middleton as she becomes "Her Royal Highness Princess William of Wales."
There is no turning back now, despite contrarian Christopher Hitchen's lament that she"s the next "sacrificial lamb to water the dried bones and veins of a dessicated system." (He gets paid to write with flourish, and knows in his marrow that the British wouldn't want it any other way.)
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THE CIVIL WAR BETWEEN TSA WORKERS AND TRAVELING AMERICANS RATCHES UP A NOTCH with former Miss USA 2003 crying foul over a TSA patdown she received at the Dallas-Ft. Worth International Airport.
"I'm sure this woman is just doing her job, but she ...actually felt, touched my vagina,'' actress and former beauty queen Susie Castillo, who appears on NBC's series SCHOOL PRIDE, says on a video posted on YouTube.
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EVEN CNN'S ANCHOR IS TIRED OF THIS STORY. "Okay," sighs CNNs Don Lemon 34 seconds into a story about Lohan's recent five-hour incarceration, "more with the Lindsay Lohan saga."
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BYE BYE, JAIL BIRDIE.
Lindsay Lohan was sentenced to 120 days in jail for violating the terms of her probation in a previous drunk driving case after a judge refused to dismiss a theft charge against her.
"I see a level of brazenness with 'Let me see what I can get away with here," Los Angeles Supe4rior Court Judge Stephanie Sautner said in sentencing Lohan to 120 days and 480 hours of community service.
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FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE BEING CAUGHT ON TAPE SPEWING SHOCKING VITRIAL AT OKSANA GRIGORIEVA, MEL GIBSON IS TALKING.
Just weeks before the release of The Beaver, in which he portrays a depressed middle-aged man who communicates through a puppet, Gibson gives a guarded interview with Deadline's Allison Hope Weiner. It's the first time he's talked since his violent, hate-filled rants toward Oskana were released to the public, and in it he rues his decision to become an actor, frets over the well-being of his children, muses about death -- and comes off largely unapologetic for his actions.
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OUT OF THE MOUTH OF A BABE WHEN ASKED ABOUT LADY GAGA:
"Nobody talks about her anymore."
Truth's out! With the exception of certifiable crazies, the buzz on Gah seems to have quieted ever since she hatched from an egg at the 2011 Grammy Awards.
The ridiculousness of the stunt made her seem, well, cracked. And desperate.
Read the full post here.
THE LADY HATCHLING SQUAWKS AGAIN! And this time she's swearing that she would never, ever undergo the knife just to make herself more beautiful.
Read the full post here.
OK! THEN. MARIAH AND NICK! WE'VE SEEN YOUR NAKED EMBRACE, NOW PUT YOUR CLOTHES BACK ON.
Exhibitionist Mariah Carey goes full frontal on the cover of the downmarket celebrity tabloid OK! as her loving manservant gives hands-on support. The creepy snap is spreading a bad case of viral vomitus.
Read the full post here.
IN CASE YOU WEREN'T ALREADY CONVINCED, NEW EVIDENCE EMERGES DEPICTING MARK ZUCKERBERG AS A SCHEMING SHARK.
Zuckerberg's duplicitous crimes were recounted in last year's critical hit The Social Network. The movie retells in Hollywood fashion how Zuck deceived his original business partner as well as three Harvard upperclassmen who hired him to develop a social network.
Read the full post here.
CHARLIE SHEEN MANAGED TO STEER HIS "TORPEDO OF TRUTH" THROUGH CHICAGO SUNDAY NIGHT without it detonating in his face.
On day two of the TV actor's hastily conceived gonzo road show, Sheen dropped the opening act and the video clips that played abysmally in Detroit only 24 hours earlier. Instead, it was Charlie in the raw -- a meandering 90 minute chat about the "kidnapper" wife and thieving porn stars and the "mean streets of Malibu" and his ever-loving goddesses. You know, the ones who refuse to "disavow" him of everything that he cherishes. The ones who refuse to judge him.
Seems Chicagoans didn't come to pass harsh judgment on the porn-loving party boy either as Sheen regaled the crowd with stories about George Clooney being so cool he's a "robot" and and Laura Dern losing her virginity.
Read the full post here.
SNOW WHITE AND HER PRINCE HAVE BEEN CAST IN THE UPCOMING 3-D REMAKE OF THE CLASSIC FAIRYTALE AND THE FAIREST OF THEM ALL? Why that's pretty Armie Hammer, who's won the role of the prince who revives the cursed princess in Relativity Media's "edgy" remaking of the classic fairytale.
Read the full post here.
TELL US JIMMY, WHAT DOES A KISS FROM AN ADONIS WITH TIGER'S BLOOD TASTE LIKE?
The Charlie Sheen so-crazy-that-he'll-melt-your-face-off-just-by-looking-at-him-tour made a stop at Jimmy Kimmel's and planted a big, wet kiss on the talk-show host.
Read the full post here.
THE KING OF CONFESSIONAL RADIO reveals a few secrets of his own in the Rolling Stone issue hitting newsstands Friday.
The shock jock admits that he was devastated by his divorce from his first wife Alison.
"My marriage ending blew my mind," Stern admitted. "I was upset that I failed and let down my family, my kids, my ex-wife. It was all very painful."
"I was totally neurotic...I knew things weren't right, and I said, 'Gee, where am I going to get some answers?' I had never been a guy to turn to religion but then as my marriage was coming to an end, I needed help to explain it to my children and make sense of it all...Because once you are a divorced guy, being a father is a whole different thing."
Read the full post here.
CHARLIE SHEEN IS TELLING ALEC BALDWIN TO STUFF HIS PIE-HOLE.
The gonzo star has reacted to Baldwin spewing advice to Sheen in a blog post.
"You can't win. Really. You can't,'' Baldwin wrote over at The Huffington Post.
Read the full post here.
AFTER MONTHS OF WHISPERS, Jessica Biel and Justin Timberlake have confirmed their love is kaput.
The couple was seen looking sparkly together last month at a post-Oscar party. (Or maybe their eyes were just smiling for the cameras.) But rumors had been rolling that Timberlake had been gifting his tallywacker to other Hollywood lovelies, most recently actress Mila Kunis. And E!'s Ted Casablanca is reporting that Biel is "devastated" over the break.
Read the full post here.
THE 3:34 MOCK COOKING SHOW PROVES THAT CHARLIE SHEEN WILL ALWAYS BE A WINNER.
FunnyorDie's spoof spoof video shows the bad boy-cum-cook delivering every line with snap and special sauce.
Sheen may have tiger blood coursing through his veins. He may be a rock star Vatican assassin. He may be a fucking raving lunatic -- but he's also a hilarious loon serving up delicious word soup.
CBS honchos, are you sure you know what the hell you're doing?
Read the full post here.
OKAY! LADY GAGA IS POSSIBLY LETTING HER MEDIA POWER GO TO HER/HIS (come on...we all question it, don't act like you don't!) head.
The fame monster has reneged on an exclusive deal with Target to release a special edition of her hotly anticipated album, Born This Way. The special release would have included three extra studio tracks and five remixes.
Read the full post here.
WELL, THAT WAS FAST.
Now that Charlie Sheen's on the downslide from winning, speculation is ramping up over who will replace him on CBS' rating juggernaut Two And A Half Men.
The Internet has turned the guessing into a hilarious game -- with contestants ranging from the obvious (Rob Lowe, John Stamos) to the crackpot (Gary Busey? David Hasselhoff? Ugh, hello! Didn't Charlie blur reality and art enough? Unless CBS is interested in starting an AA chapter on the set.)
I've got no dog in the fight -- except wishing that a web rumor spread yesterday that CBS' firing Sheen was a strategic attempt to get him back to serious. (Then again, I've always been a sucker for a happy ending.) But why stay on the sidelines when I've got a blog to fill? So let's review the rumors and start a few of our own:
Stamos, of Full House fame has been filling his time playing the slick dentist boyfriend to counselor Emma on Glee. But the underemployed actor's has been dropping hints that he'd like the job, telling Entertainment Weekly that "television has just gotten so rich....So I’m looking for a place to settle down in television again."
Stamos was among the first mentioned as a Sheen substitute. Sheen reacted by saying Uncle Jesse would "suck" in the role, but later tweeted that he was out of line. "You're a beautiful man, and a talented man," he apologized, "If you get the gig, we should talk."
Read the full post here.
AS THE CHARLIE SHEEN SHOW CAREENS OUT OF CONTROL, and debate roils about whether the actor's gone crazy or is just plain canny, seeping up from the muck is a question that deserves discussion:
Did CBS and Warner Bros. enable Charlie?
Read the full post here.
THIS IS PART OF THE REPUBLICANS' PROBLEM: THEY WANT UNMARRIED 28-YEAR-OLD WOMEN TO EITHER BE VIRGINS, OR TO HAVE ABORTIONS IF THEY BECOME PREGNANT.
Now Republicans don't actually say either thing out loud. But that's the underlying message when you have buffoons like Mike Huckabee single out the very pregnant Harvard graduate and Academy Award winning actress Natalie Portman.
Read the full post here.
KATIE HOLMES AND TOM CRUISE HAVE BEEN TARGETS OF supermarket tabloids for years. But apparently Star Magazine crossed their imaginary line with the January headline that screeched, "ADDICTION NIGHTMARE -- Katie DRUG SHOCKER! -- The Real Reason She Can't Leave Tom."
Read the full post here.
"I LIKE CRAZY PEOPLE WHO DON'T GIVE A FUCK,'' ROBERT PATTISON TELLS Vanity Fair in explaining why he grooves on Charlie Sheen. Apparently, he's got a lot of company: Less than 24 hours after the gone-gonzo Hollywood star signed on to Twitter, more than 800,000 people are following him. I confess: I am one of them.
"Just got invited to do the Nancy Grace show,'' Sheen wrote in his second tweet. "I'd rather go on a long road trip with Chuck Lorre in a '75 Pacer...."
Read the full post here.
AS CHARLIE SHEEN CONTINUES HIS WAR AGAINST ASSASSINS -- IN HOLLYWOOD AND NOT THE VATICAN -- it's increasingly clear that fear fuels his "epic" media campaign.
Sheen's all-out offense to win back his CBS sitcom has included stops at NBC's Today, ABC's 20/20 and Good Morning America, CNN's Piers Morgan Tonight and even Internet tabloid TMZ.
Read the full post here.
THE JOLT OF ADRENALINE THAT RACED THROUGH THE CHATTERING CLASSES AFTER CHARLIE SHEEN's self-inflicted celebrity-cide is waning. The shock is fading; exhaustion is seeping in.
Or maybe that's just me after spending too, too many hours documenting every um and ah that Sheen dropped during his 18-minute cherry bomb on the Alex Jones Show. Wasn't that very servicey of me!
No doubt millions of words have already been spilled on Sheen's spectacular flameout on the conspiracy theorist's radio program. (Coincidence? I think not!) But the ones that we'll remember most are those thrown down by the poet with magic fingertips.
We earlier published the first half of Sheen's conversation with Jones. Here's the second and final part of that wild ride:
Read the full post here.
THE SPECTACULAR DISPLAY OF CHARLIE SHEEN'S "WINNING" MEGALOMANIA on the Alex Jones Show wins the award for crazy.
Manic, stuttering, sputtering, the actor revealed himself to be wildly audacious, defiant, irreverent, wreckless, anti-Semitic, -- a "celebratory nihilist" obsessed with the Vietnam War movie Apocalypse Now.
In a word, breathtaking. And it was a show that Charlie was only too happy to deliver to us nameless ugly schmucks. So here for your incomprehending pleasure is part one of the complete transcript of Charlie's explosive interview.
Read the full post here.
SI WAS THINKING, HMMMM. There's been a lot of buzz lately that Denise Richards, ex-wife of the porndog pariah Charlie Sheen, would just love to join Giggy and the gals. Well, what are her qualifications?
Read the full post here.
YOU FORGOT THE REQUISITE WIFE, GEORGE!
Hollywood dreamboat George Clooney says he's ruled out a run for political office, telling Newsweek, "I f--ked too many chicks and did too many drugs, and that's the truth."
But surely such a colorful past only precludes Clooney from becoming president; George still could still run for the governorship of California once he got the whole presidency issue ironed out. Spending so much in the clay hills of Italy might be problematic.
Read the full post here.
ROCK, MEET HARD PLACE.
A spy is squealing to Popeater's Rob Shuter that the all-powerful O and her new fiery underling Rosie O'Donnell are feuding over Rosie's new show on OWN.
Read the full post here.
JOHN TRAVOLTA HAS STEPPED OUT OF THE CLOSET AND REVEALED THAT HE'S...BALDING
The A-lister was snapped sans hair piece while beachgoing with his family in Hawaii.
Check out Justin Bieber Cuts His Mop & Twitter Reacts.
Read the full post here.
"THINKING ABOUT GETTING A HAIRCUT…HMMMMMM," tweeted the Biebs this afternoon while on the set of a Rascal Flats music video.
The next thing you know the popster is showing off his freshly cut hair on TMZ. Gone is the mop crop that made him look like Davy Jones. In its place, a chop that butches up the Bieb; no more will he be confused for the lesbian next door.
Read the full post here.
NICOLE KIDMAN AND CHRISTINA APPLEGATE ARE BOTH TALKING ABOUT THE HEARTSWELLING JOY OF HAVING NEWBORNS.
Kidman opened up to Australia's 60 Minutes about her struggle to have another child with husband Keith Urban. "Anyone that's been in the place of wanting another child or wanting a child knows the disappointment, the pain and the loss that you go through trying and struggling with fertility," the 43-year-old actress told Australia's 60 Minutes on Sunday.
Read the full post here.
NOW THIS IS COMEDY!
CBS' funnyman Charlie Sheen called in to the Dan Patrick show today to defend his professionalism and to throw out some advice to his fellow troubled thespian, Lindsay Lohan.
Read the full post here.
BILLY RAY CYRUS BARES HIS ACHY BREAKY HEART IN A GQ interview in which he blames his daughter Miley's hit TV show Hannah Montana for his family's breakup.
"I'll tell you right now - - the damn show destroyed my family," Cyrus laments about the Disney show that turned his daughter into a household name.
Read the full post here.
JUSTIN BIEBER DID NOT CRACK UP UPON SEEING LADY GAGA IN AN EGG. He just thought she was weird.
Read the full post here.
IT'S AS IF THE ENTIRE GRAMMY COMMUNITY CONSPIRED TO PROVE THERE'S more playas in today's music than a manic fame monster in meat dress.
Read the full post here.
I WASN'T A TEENY BOPPER WHEN I WAS A TEENAGER, BUT THIS KID MAKES ME, WELL, let's say it one more time...a "Belieber."
Fresh-faced, upbeat, positive, Justin Bieber is, like, a one-person salve for a corrupt world that steals kids' innocence even before they know what the word means.
Read the full post here.
IT'S HARD TO BELIEVE THAT EMINEM HAS MELLOWED, but the Detroit rapper who rose to fame giving voice to rape fantasies and maternal hatred has tempered his offstage rage. Yet his music is still fired by anger and emotional rawness even as he's become an elder statesman of rap who gives a standout performance every time he steps on stage.
Read the full post here.
YOU KNOW YOU GOT A KEEPER WHEN WHITEY WANTS TO CO-OPT YOUR SONG, and that's exactly what happened with Cee Lo Green's Fuck You was covered by the lily white Gwynnie Paltrow.
Read the full post here.
IT'S HARD TO DISPUTE JAY-Z's SELF-ANOINTMENT AS RAP GOD WHEN THE TITLE SINGLE FROM Empire State Of Mind has commanded 80.5 million YouTube hits.
Jay-Z's ballad about surviving New York City's badlands has become anthem for artists' Darwinian fight to the top.
Read the full post here.
MY HEAD TOLD MY HEART: I gotta love earnest erudite English boys who perform rock folk with their own brand of fierceness.
The four lads who comprise Mumford & Sons are up for two Grammys this year -- for Best New Artist and for Best Rock Song for Little Lion Man.
Read the full post here.
STARFUCKING HAS NEVER APPEALED TO ME, BUT I ADMIT: I'VE ALWAYS HAD A STRONG STREAK OF GROUPIE.
I'm a bad pretender, the idea of acting tantamount to aspiring to lie.
But play me honest music -- loudly -- expressing love or hate or fear or anger or hope or faith and I'll reach orgasmic levels of pleasure.
As the world counts down to the 53rd Grammy Awards, I'm gonna work myself up to a frenzy listening to some of music to be celebrated on CBS Sunday night. Won't you join me?
Read the full post here.
WHICH REVIEWERS BECAME BELIEBERS AFTER CHECKING OUT JUSTIN'S JUST-RELEASED NEVER SAY NEVER? Let's recap.
Read the full post here.
LADY GAGA IS PRACTICALLY JUICING IN HER PANTS THESE DAYS WITH SELF-LOVE.
The most provocative pop star of our time can't stop declaring how much she's God's gift to music.
Check out The Predatory Pop Star Goes Pink For Vogue.
Born This Way But Not Of This World: Lady Gaga's New Cover Art.
Read the full post here.
TED WILLIAMS' RECOVERY IS BACK IN HIS OWN HANDS.
The velvet-voiced homeless man who captivated the nation is reportedly living in a Los Angeles "sober house" while pursuing voiceover work.
Read the full post here.
WHEN HE DIVORCES HIS NEXT, FOURTH, WIFE, KELSEY GRAMMER SHOULD take care not to setting a wedding date with his new squeeze until the divorce is final.
Read the full post here.
AS FRIDAY'S RELEASE OF NEVER SAY NEVER APPROACHES, JUSTIN BIEBER EXPANDS HIS DOMINATION OVER POP CULTURE.
Every day there's something new in the news: Justin Does Top 10 on Letterman! Justin Bieber Plays Matchmaker! Justin Bieber's In Love with Selena Gomez!
This kid is a wonder and the public can't get enough of him.
Read the full post here.
LADY GAGA has released ther cover art for her hotly anticipated upcoming album Born This Way depicting her as an alien creature from another planet.
The cover's "fierce"-looking creature has a wild mane of hair, pointy shoulders and what appears to be Spock eyebrows implanted underneath her skin.
The art was debuted by her new BFF Perez Hilton, that lover of drippy spermatoza who bloviates, "It is soooo fierce deluxe."
Fierce, blah blah blah. Play me the music.
THE VERY POSH BECKHAM CLAN IS THRILLED BY THE NEWS DELIVERED WHEN 36-year-old Victoria had her 16 week sonogram. It's a girl!
Read the full post here.
HOW DOES ACTRESS NATALIE PORTMAN STAY SO GROUNDED? One way is to avoid watching herself on film.
"I watch a film once, then never see it again," the expecting mother tells the Los Angeles Times. "I think it's dangerous to watch yourself.
Read the full post here.
NICOLE KIDMAN OPENS UP FOR THE FIRST TIME about the heartbreak she suffered when her marriage to megastar Tom Cruise crumbled.
The Oscar winner and new mum to Faith Margaret confided to Marie Claire UK issue that she was "damaged" after Tom Cruise filed for divorce.
Read the full post here.
Styleite has snagged a copy of next month's Vogue featuring the predatory popster Lady Gaga going pink.
The fashion website leaked the March issue with Gah on the cover looking like a modern flapper in a short, pink, banged bob and a cream low-waisted dress.
Read the full post here.
HALLE BERRY'S LIFE HAS BEEN A ROLLERCOASTER RIDE OF UPS AND DOWNS, abusive relationships and career success. But her life took on a fairytale sheen once she had her baby Nahla with model boyfriend Gabriel Aubry. That was until she broke up with her baby daddy in April of 2010.
Read the full post here.
CHARLIE SHEEN THINKS HIS CRITICS ARE "TURDS" FOR INTERFERING WITH HIS COKE AND PORN-FUELED FUN. And we'd be the first to recognize Charlie's right to slow suicide if it weren't for Sam and Lola and Bob and Max.
Sam and Lola are Sheen's darling but perpetually frowning little girls with Denise Richards. Bob and Max are his twin sons born to estranged wife Brooke Mueller. And now the tabs are atwitter over how Sheen's addiction to sleaze is affecting his kids.
Read the full post here.
WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN YOU CROSS A REPORTER and a friend with an anecdote? A news story!
And because NPR's Eliza Barclay has a friend who fell from her high-riding vegetarian wagon, we can now snack on her story about why bacon is the "gateway meat" for vegetarians.
Seems after 15 years of satiating her hunger with brown rice and fruit and veggies, Eliza's friend took a whiff of the sizzle in her boyfriend's frying pan and had to have it now! And, no, that is not some sexxy euphemism.
Read the full post here.
CHARLIE SHEEN'S PORN PLAYMATE KACEY JORDAN SUFFERS FROM AN ORAL FIXATION: The girl can't shut up!
Ever since her Wednesday night bacchanal with the master of the small screen -- Sheen makes $1.25 million per episode of Two And A Half Men -- Jordan has regaled us with secrets from inside Charlie's porn palace.
Read the full post here.
FATALISTS CAN PUT AWAY THEIR ROSARY BEADS AS WISCONSIN OFFICIALS SAY "BAD SPUDS" and not the impending Apocalypse killed 200 cows on a Wisconsin farm last week.
"The cows were poisoned by a toxin found in moldy sweet potatoes, which apparently were mixed in with potato waste fed to the animals,'' said Peter Vanderloo, associate director of the Wisconsin Veterinary Diagnostic Laboratory.
Read the full post here.
MOVE ALONG, NOTHING TO SEE HERE, unless you can't look away from the soul bleeding out on life's decadent highway.
Read the full post here.
WHAT IS THERE TO SAY ABOUT CHARLIE SHEEN?
That he's an addict? That's an effing cliche. That he likes porn stars for sale? Pshaw, old news.
That he likes smoking snort by the suitcase-full? Now we're talking.
Read the full post here.
SHE'S A FREAK OF NATURE BECAUSE JENNIFER ANISTON HAS LABORED THE LONGEST GESTATIONAL PATH TO MOTHERHOOD IN TABLOID HISTORY, am I right?
Everybody's favorite Ms. Lonelyhearts, the one in perpetual search of her one, true, love, has purportedly surrendered her dream of ever finding a man to begin a biological family.
Read the full post here.
BRITISH ACTOR SACHA BARON COHEN WAS BRILLIANTLY CONVINCING AS A MURDEROUS BLOODTHIRSTY BARBER IN THE MOVIE Sweeney Todd. So who better to play the murderous bloodthirsty tyrant Saddam Hussein?
Cohen has been signed to star in an upcoming biopic loosely based on the dead Iraqi leader.
Read the full post here.
IT'S A MATCH MADE IN REALITY TV HEAVEN, AND NOW THEIR TATTOOED HEARTS CAN BEAT AS ONE.
Only months after being outed as a cheatin' skank, Jesse James has announced he'll try his hand again at unholy matrimony: The motorcycle maniac has revealed that he popped the question to his tattooed queen, Kat Von D. (To whom we suggest in the nicest way possible that she have her head examined.)
Read the full post here.
SHE MIGHT HAVE THREATENED HIS LIFE BACKSTAGE AT THE GOLDEN GLOBES, but Jennifer Lopez defended Ricky Gervais' incendiary form of comedy.
J. Lo is making the media rounds in preparation for her debut as an American Idol judge Wednesday night. And during a visit to Access Hollywood, the diva was asked if she thought Gervais crossed the line with his cut ups at the award ceremony.
" Um, no,'' she answered before laughing uproariously.
Read the full post here.
THERE WERE STARS BY THE DOZENS! Brangelina! Al Pacino! Matt Damon! Tom Hanks! Johnny Depp! Anne Hathaway! Scarlett Johansson! Sandra Bullock! Justin Bieber! Colin Firth! And yadda yadda yadda.
There were gorgeous gowns to ogle! But 36 hours after the 68th Annual Golden Globes, all anybody really wants to talk about is Ricky Gervais.
Read the full post here.
HE SAID HE WARNED THEM, AND BY FOUR MINUTES IN TO THE 68TH ANNUAL GOLDEN GLOBE AWARDS, those in charge of booking Ricky Gervais as emcee were no doubt second-guessing their decision. The British comic wasted no time slicing and dicing Hollywood's biggest stars with an incisor-edged wit that deflated the self-congratulatory air from the room -- but also likely riveted viewers.
Check out And The Winner Is...Ricky Gervais!"
Hollywood Hair-Raising: Ricky Gervais Is Back Hosting Golden Globes
Read the full post here.
AT 59, ROCKER STING IS SHARING THE SECRET TO KEEPING THINGS HOT BETWEEN HIM AND LONG-TIME LOVE Trudie Styler: “tawdry" sex.
One of rock's royal couples, the two have been together for 30 years, married for 18, and have six children together. And now we know why. Sting tells Harper's Bazaar that they like getting "tawdry" while doing the nasty.
"There's a playfulness we have; I like the theater of sex. I like to look good.
Read the full post here.
IN THE MIDST OF A $50 MILLION DIVORCE, the soon-to-be former Mrs. Kelsey Grammer dropped a major bombshell on Howard Stern's XM Radio show on Wednesday. An eyebrow-raising, questionably-dressed bombshell.
Read the full post here.
THAT SHEEN ON CHARLIE? SWEAT FROM HIM PARTYING LIKE IT'S 1999 (Seriously, who carries on this way anymore? Oh, yea: addicts.)
Read the full post here.
THEY SAY THE WIFE IS ALWAYS THE LAST TO KNOW, and apparently it's true even when the wifey poo is a Scarlett A-list movie star.
Tongues are o'waggin' that Ryan Reynolds is hooking up with America's sweetheart, Sandra Bullock, reportedly leaving his soon-to-be ex Johansson seething at the rebound.
Read the full post here.
CONGRATS GO OUT TO THE GENETICALLY BLESSED VICTORIA AND DAVID BECKHAM, WHO have announced they are expecting their fourth child this summer. And let's give mankind a hand too because we all benefit when beautiful people procreate: It's called evolution.
Read the full post here.
JUSTINE BIEBER ISN'T THE ONLY A-LISTER talking about his need to Pray: Mark Wahlberg and Nicole Kidman both revealed in recent interviews that they pray.
Kidman, 43, confides to Jennifer Aniston in an upcoming Harper's Bazaar that she prayed to God to meet a man just like Keith Urban shortly after encountering him for the first time.
"I remember thinking, Oh, my God, if you ever gave me a man like that, I promise I would be completely devoted for the rest of my life. Something that wild,'' she told Aniston. "I remembered praying after I met him that I'd meet somebody, if not him, like him."
Read the full post here.
THE ADORABLY DOPEY DAVID ARQUETTE HAS checked into a rehab to tame his drinking and depression.
"Rehab was inevitable," a source told People. "He is dealing with a broken heart. He can't handle all the changes in his life. All his inner demons came out."
Read the full post here.
HAPPY NEW YEAR! With last night's revelries just a dream away, and hangovers tamed by time and rehydration, let's consider what's in store for 2011. It's a tradition here at CrabbyGolightly to predict celebrity happenings for the upcoming year -- so what if we're batting zero? It's all in the fun. So without further ado:
Needing to top her last, best, publicity stunt, -- the meat dress -- LADY GAGA sacrifices a live cow on stage, then throw cuts of raw flesh to her ravenous fans. The public bloodletting is the only way the predatory pop star can garner even bigger headlines than she did last year -- and it works: 3,000 concertgoers are hospitalized in the worst case of food poisoning ever.
Read the full post here.
2010 WILL GO DOWN AS ONE OF THE MOST SHOCKINGLY ENTERTAINING in Tinsel Town history, but for all the wrong reasons.
Just trying to make a time line of the year's most disturbing events can make your head spin. Not to worry; I've done the hard work for you.
Read the full post here.
MUSICIANS JUSTIN BIEBER AND OZZY OSBOURNE COULDN'T BE MORE DIFFERENT, BUT each proved himself a "giver" over the weekend.
Pop prince Bieber used his power over the people to raise donations for sick Atlanta children. The 16-year-old asked concertgoers attending his Dec. 23rd sold-out show to drop off toys at a bus parked outside the city's Philips Arena. The toy drive was a campaign of Q100 DJ Bert Weiss, and Bieber himself reportedly visited some hospitalized kids.
Read the full post here.
THEY TEACH YOU IN JOURNALISM 101 THAT SEX SELLS, and media coverage of Julian Assange proves the lesson again.
Despite a four-year record of revealing governmental criminality, the audacious Aussie who challenged the US military machine is becoming a perpetual punchline for which every joke is about sex. He's become the Arthur Kade of cryptography.
Read the full post here.
REHAB LOOKS LIKE JUST ANOTHER STOP ON LINDSAY LOHAN'S TRIP TO PERDITION.
Just hours after a technician claimed publicly that the spoiled actress ripped a phone from her hand and caused a sprain, the Betty Ford Clinic has fired the worker.
Dawn Holland told TMZ that she smelled alcohol on Lindsay's breath when the starlet returned back to the clinic after curfew Dec. 12.
Read the full post here.
ASHTON KUTCHER IS EXPECTED TO TESTIFY AT THE MURDER TRIAL OF THE SUSPECTED "CHILLER KILLER" SERIAL SLAYER accused of slashing three women to death and attacking another.
In February 2001, Kutcher was dating 22-year-old Ashley Ellerin when she was found stabbed 35 times in her Hollywood apartment. Kutcher, then starring in That 70s Show, was supposed to go on a date with Ellerin the night before she was found. When she did not answer her door, he peered inside and spotted what he thought was a large red wine stain; it was Ellerin's blood.
Read the full post here.
DID JOHNNY DEPP WANT SOME Pirates' booty?
Read the full post here.
THE SPECTACLE IN THE SKY IS SET TO TAKE PLACE IN THE WEE HOURS TUESDAY MORNING. THAT'S WHEN the earth's shadow will cast a rosy pall over a full moon during the first lunar eclipse since 2008.
The show falls on the winter solstice, the shortest day of the year. And depending on who you read, the last time that happened was either 300 or 500 years ago, but who's counting?
Those keen on the details can review the 12 stages of an eclipse here at Space.com.
Me? I just want to look at the pretty pictures like the one above by Lloyd K. Barnes on Flickr. "This is an image of the moon during the total lunar eclipse, superimposed over the Vancouver night skyline,'' says Barnes on Flickr. "Both shots were taken in the early morning of August 28, 2007 during the eclipse. Some photoshop colour work was done on the city shot, but the moon was actually this colour."
More lunar eclipse photos from Flickr below.
Read the full post here.
WINONA RYDER REVEALS IN AN INTERVIEW WITH GQ THAT SHE GOT A GLIMPSE OF MEL GIBSON'S CORRUPT SOUL AT A Hollywood party 15 years ago.
"Fifteen years ago, I was at one of those big Hollywood parties. And he was really drunk," Ryder, 39, tells GQ.
Read the full post here.
BY SPILLING ON HOWARD STERN'S SHOW FOR A THIRD TIME, David Arquette confirms that he's looking for love in all the wrong places.
Dude. Pull. It. Together.
In a rambling conversation, Arquette said he's seeing a shrink and drinking a lot while he tries to sort his way out from under the cloud darkening his life since Cougar Courtney Cox escaped his clingy embrace. He admitted that CoCo "didn't want to be my mother. But I kind of need a mother."
Read the full post here.
CONVICTED ANIMAL KILLER MICHAEL VICK WANTS A DOG.
"I think it would be a big step for me in the rehabilitation process,"' Vick says in an interview with TheGrio. "I think just to have a pet in my household and to show people that I genuinely care and my love and my passion for animals, I think it would be outstanding. And if ever have that opportunity again, then I’ll never take it for granted."
Read the full post here.
FASHIONISTA NICOLE RICHIE PROVES HER PEDIGREE ONCE AGAIN in a gorgeous white and lace wedding confection that marries snap and sophistication.
People delivered a sneak peak of the dress -- one of three Nicole wore on her wedding day -- in advance of its next issue which has exclusive coverage of the Richie-Madden union.
Read the full post here.
THE FORMER TV CHEF CONVICTED OF A MURDER-FOR-HIRE PLOT AGAINST HIS WIFE told police that he was seeking a 'merciful' way to end her suffering over infertility.
Food Network chef Juan-Carlos Cruz, author of The Love Diet, was convicted of conspiring to kill his wife and high-school sweetheart Jennifer Campbell in October.
Read the full post here.
WERE THEY JUST TOO SEXY FOR THEIR OWN GOOD?
The sexiest man alive Ryan Reynolds and sexiest woman alive Scarlett Johansson have called it quits after two years of marriage. And I for one am not surprised.
Read the full post here.
LIZ HURLEY's MARRIAGE TO ARUN NAYAR IS KAPUT, THE SAD RESULT OF THE INDIAN BUSINESSMAN BEING "fatally unglamorous,'' according to British wags.
The model-actress-playgirl was caught over the weekend getting kissy faced with skeevy Australian cricket legend Shane Warner, a "voracious philanderer" who reportedly has bedded more than 1,000 lasses.
Read the full post here.
THE DERANGED EX-CON WHO BRAGGED ABOUT MURDERING HOLLYWOOD publicity Ronni Chasen for money is now believed to have killed her, but police believe her killing was a random act of violence.
A tipster had notified America's Most Wanted about Harold Smith's claims, but when police went to question him as a "person of interest" he shot himself in the head.
Read the full post here.
IS THERE ANY TRUTH TO THE RUMOR THAT Britney's new man hits her?
Or that she might be getting ready to marry him?
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say no to both.
Because here's the thing about post-nuthouse Britney: she has no control or say over her life anymore. Trawick's got the only peen she's allowed to be around.
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JEN ANISTON'S NEW BFF CHELSEA HANDLER CALLED ANGELINA JOLIE a "c**nt" and a "b**ch" while performing a standup comedy routine in Newark, NJ over the weekend.
"She gives interviews, 'I don't have a lot of female friends.'
Read the full post here.
THE HOLLYWOOD WHODUNIT SURROUNDING THE MURDER OF PUBLICIST RONNI CHASEN ONLY DEEPENS now that the prime suspect has killed himself after being confronted by police.
The suspect, so far only identified as "Harold," a 40-something African American man who reportedly spent previous time in prison, had reportedly bragged to neighbors that he was Chasen's killer.
Read the full post here.
JOHNNY DEPP FEEDS CROW TO DISNEY STUDIOS in an upcoming Vanity Fair interview.
The fan favorite reveals to rocker-cum-writer Patti Smith that the movie studio's brass hated his portrayal of pirate Jack Sparrow in the original Pirates Of The Caribbean.
"They couldn't stand him," says Depp, with then-CEO Michael Eisner going so far as to say Depp was "ruining the movie."
Read the full post here.
THE WEB'S OVERLORD GOOGLE IS FINALLY BEING CALLED ON THE CARPET.
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GROUPON'S STAYING MUM ON REPORTS THAT THE CHICAGO-BASED online coupon company has been snapped up by Google for an estimated $2.5 billion.
"There's been no announcement so everything's been speculation and rumors," Groupon's Julie Mossler said Monday evening. "I don't have anything else to say.
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MAYBE IT'S HORMONES BUT GIRL ROCKER PINK IS POSITIVELY OOZING LUST FOR HER BABY DADDY CAREY HART.
"Did you see him on [the 2010 American Music Awards] red carpet?,'' the Philly native gushed on The Billy Bush Show. "God, he looked so good. He's so handsome."
The lusty singer revealed on The Ellen DeGeneres Show in mid-November that she's "eating for two" and recently described her hubby as "so excited."
Read the full post here.
JAY-Z'S SPILLED TO THE GUARDIAN ABOUT THE TIME HE SHOT HIS BROTHER WHEN he was 12 years old.
The native Brooklynite squeezed his eyes shut and popped his older sibling Eric after he stole his ring to sell for crack cocaine.
"It was terrible," Jay-Z says not altogether convincingly.
Read the full post here.
CELEBRITIES WHO'VE GOT SOMETHING TO SELL have to suckle at the mother whore's teat -- the media. Which is how we learned this week that Baby Jesus watches over Cher while she sleeps, why mac' n cheese helps Tiger Woods redefine "victory," and how Rachel Uchitel wears flowers when she wants to "reinvent herself."
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THE BECOMING CATHERINE ELIZABETH MIDDLETON IS no Diana Spencer, and no matter how beloved the deceased Princess was, that may be a good thing.
While both share the traits of being tall and leggy with regal bearings, at 28 Kate Middleton is a much more worldly sophisticate than Diana was as a shy girl introduced to the world in 1981.
Read the full post here.
A JAWBONE WITH A TOOTH ATTACHED WAS FOUND BY AN AMERICAN TOURIST IN ARUBA, AND investigators are performing DNA tests to see if it belongs to Natalee Holloway.
The blond 18-year-old disappeared while on a high school graduation vacation more than five years ago.
Read the full post here.
THE FUTURE KING OF ENGLAND IS OBVIOUSLY NOT A SUPERSTITIOUS MAN. Sentimental, yes, but not superstitious.
How else to explain why Prince William proposed to Catherine Elizabeth Middleton with his mother's sapphire and diamond engagement ring?
William said today that gifting his mother's ring to the famously patient Waity Katie enabled him to make his mother a part of the momentous occasion. But remembering the luminous Diana also means recalling the neglect with which she lived as Prince Charles' wife.
Ultimately, the marriage between the Duke and Duchess of Windsor was a dour, depressing affair, and the ring that united their marriage is a symbol of that star-crossed union.
Piqued about Will & Kate's own marital fate, we sought insights from an instantaneous astrological compatibility chart at CafeAstrology. And what we found was good news! Inside, the unambiguous results between William, a sensitive Cancer, and Catherine, a practical, earthy Capricorn.
Read the full post here.
BLACK EYED PEAS FRONTMAN WILL.I.AM IS lashing out at Sony executives and managers of Michael Jackson's estate for bringing to market the upcoming Michael album.
"Whoever put it out and is profiting off of it, I want to see how cold they are,'' the rapper tells EW.com.
Read the full post here.
MAD MEL'S CRAZY ONCE AGAIN'S SHOWING IN COURT PAPERS HE FILED EXPLAINING THAT HE SLAPPED Oskana on the night of January 6, 2010 to bring her to her senses.
"I slapped Oksana one time with an open hand in an attempt to bring her back to reality,'' Mel rationalizes in the court papers dated June 23.
Mel Gibson's Love Letters To Oksana: A Kind Of An Exquisite Hurt
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HANGING AROUND WITH ROCK STARS AND HIP HOPPERS HAS PAID OFF HANDSOMELY FOR GWYNNIE PALTROW, who shows off her singing chops in this week's upcoming Glee episode.
Paltrow visits the Glee set as substitute teacher Holly Holliday. But while Gwynnie is a favorite internet target for her self-declared fabulousness, Holly Holiday comes off as hip fauxhemian that the kiddies can admire. Hell, if having Paltrow on Glee show means less contrived awkward kissing scenes, write her in as a regular!
Anyhoo, here's the latest drumroll for Tuesday's episode of Paltron singing Cee Lo Green's "F--k You."
Read the full post here.
JUST WHEN THE MEL GIBSON-OKSANA GRIGORIEVA STORY was losing impetus for bloggers along comes love letters that stab you in the heart while providing new context.
Thanks to private papers leaked by TMZ, the Gibson-Grigorieva conflict now becomes the Cold War Between The Capitalist Pig and the Communist.
Read the full post here.
WHAT'S SHE SELLING THIS TIME?
That was my first reaction seeing all the buzz about Angelina Jolie gracing the cover of Vogue's December issue. It's a quarter to The Tourist's release -- and like clockwork, Ang is out shoveling the spin.
Read the full post here.
APPARENTLY THERE IS SOMETHING WORSE THAN BEING STUCK ON A CRUISE LINER FOR 72 HOURS SANS PHONE, AIR CONDITIONING AND FLUSHING TOILETS: being served Spam.
"Despite media reports to the contrary, Carnival Splendor guests were never served Spam!," tweeted someone at Carnival Cruise Lines this afternoon.
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DESPITE DECADES OF COURT-MANDATED BUSING AND social promotion through affirmative action laws, a new study has dared to say what many in America have long avoided hearing: there is a persistent gaping difference in the proficiency of black students that poverty alone does not explain.
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THE PROMOTIONAL POSTER FOR MEL GIBSON'S UPCOMING FLICK The Beaver gives a wink wink to Mel's documented dementia toward Oksana Grigorieva.
"Hello, this person is under the care of a prescription puppet. Please, treat him as you normally would, but address yourself to the puppet."
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KATY PERRY MIGHT HAVE KISSED A GIRL AND LIKED IT, BUT IT'S HER NEW HUBBY WHO'S hitting all the right spots for her.
The cotton candied pop star plays sophisticate in a Harper's Bazaar fashion shoot shot for the magazine's cover. And in a short interview she coos about finding the perfect package in her new husband, British comic Russell Brand.
Read the full post here.
EVERYBODY KNOWS YOU GOTTA PAY TO BE A PLAYA, and just in case you needed reminding, here comes Speidi crying poor.
Maybe Heid Montag and Spencer Pratt kissed and made up because two can live more cheaply than one. Because now the duo say they owe $2 million in taxes and have spoken to a lawyer about filing bankruptcy.
Read the full post here.
POOF, AND JUST LIKE THAT, CALIFORNIA'S PROPOSITION 19 GOES UP IN SMOKE.
You'll be hearing that cliche a lot today. The proposal to make recreational use of marijuana legal in California faltered, with more than half of voters rejecting the bid.
Proponents had argued that legalizing weed would generate jobs and income for the state as well as undermine illegal drug trade.
Read the full post here.
WILL WE SOON SEE LEO DICAPRIO STALKING CHICAGO'S STREETS NOW THAT THE LADY KILLER HAS won the rights to Erik Larson's bestselling The Devil in the White City?
The 2003 historical thriller recounts the story of the charismatic, sadistic killer Dr. H.H. Holmes who preyed on single women who flocked to Chicago's waterfront during 1893 World's Columbian Exposition.
Read the full post here.
IF JUSTIN BIEBER'S NEW BOOK READS ANYTHING LIKE HE TALKS, then we know, like, we know, it's redundant.
Wearing his soon-to-be trademark Mr. Magoo glasses, the baby-faced pop sensation paid a Halloween visit to an LA bookstore to promote his new book, Justin Bieber: First Step 2 Forever: My Story. The book is just the latest exploitation of Beibermania -- with the One Less Lonely Girl glittery nail polish line and his Valentine's Day 2010 biopic up next.
Read the full post here.
COUGAR COURTENEY COX IS FINALLY TALKING PUBLICLY ABOUT HER BREAKUP WITH DAVID ARQUETTE and she sounds every bit the golden girl that her estranged hubby portrays her.
" "I don't know what will happen, but this is not like we're getting divorced," the Friends lovely tells TV Week.
Read the full post here.
THOSE ADORABLE TRICKSTERS ARE BACK!
B-listers Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt scared up some fun Saturday night in Las Vegas where Heidi hosted the Halloween Haunt at Caesars Palace' Pure Nightclub.
The fame-addicted duo hit the red carpet together for the first time since reuniting after their faux breakup allegedly concocted for more time in the spotlight.
Read the full post here.
FORGET TWO AND A HALF MEN, GET CHARLIE SHEEN A REALITY TV CONTRACT STAT!
Was there ever a better subject for one? If LaLaLand's highest paid actor isn't smacking around exwives, he's losing ritzy cars down ravines, getting locked up in rehabs, and trashing luxury hotel rooms during trysts with highpriced escorts.
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I CONFESS: I LAUGHED WHEN I READ GAWKER'S STORY BY AN ANONYMOUS PHILADELPHIAN WHO ROMPED IN THE SACK WITH THE TEA-TOTALLING CHRISTINE O'DONNELL.
I was amused that a mere three years ago, a candidate for the U.S. Senate had knocked on a near-stranger's door, assumed herself into his life for a night, adorned a ladybug Halloween costume and kicked back some beers. She sounded like a lot of fun.
Nor was I aghast or appalled by the revelation that her muff management does not include Brazilian waxes, although I did find the author's dismissal of her for having pubic hair cringe-inducing. He doesn't sound like a lot of fun.
Readers Squawk While Gawker Racks Up Hits With Christine O'Donnell Smear
Read the full post here.
A BACKLASH BREWED ON THE INTERNET LAST NIGHT AGAINST THE SNEERING Gawker dynasty after it published an anonymous story by a Philadelphia man who bedded Christine O'Donnell, the wacky witch-wannabe from Delaware's Republican Tea Party.
The article details how a tipsy O'Donnell showed up at the man's apartment one evening, convinced him to party with her, and then ended the night with sexual play short of intercourse in his bed.
Read the full post here.
OKAY, SO HE OVERSHARES. WHO ISN'T GUILTY OF THAT EVERY NOW AND THEN?
But when do you remember David Arquette ever getting so many invitations to talk shows before his break from Courteney Cox? Or are we just now paying attention?
In his latest outings, Arquette admits Courteney was miffed that he spilled intimate details on Howard Stern's radio show, but as usual his exwife was a golden girl about it all.
Read the full post here.
IT'S BEEN A WEEKEND FULL OF MILESTONES FOR THE LUMINARIES THAT LIGHT OUR HUMDRUM LIVES. Let's get right to it.
Brad and Angelina took Zahara and Pax to the Lukacs Therbal Bath in Budapest, Hungary while the other kiddies stayed with nannies. Afterwards, the couple spoke the international language of love for children, McDonalds.
It's official: Russell Brand has bagged Katy Perry.
Read the full post here.
DOES ANYBODY ELSE SEE THE IRONY OF HAVING MEL GIBSON ACT IN A FLICK TITLED Hangover 2?
Gibson's in social rehab trying to recover from not his first -- but second -- dose of devastating following release of audiotapes documenting his abuse of Oksana Grigorieva.
Read the full post here.
NINE-YEAR-OLD WILLOW SMITH'S BREAKNECK PERFORMANCE IN HER DEBUT VIDEO FOR WHIP MY HAIR is just the latest example of celebrity parents pimping out their kids.
The prepubescent daughter of Will Smith and Jada Pinkett is the couple's second child shaped by Hollywood's star-making sausage factory.
Read the full post here.
THE DEVILISH BRITISH WOMAN WHO TRASHED A CAT HAS PLEADED GUILTY TO ANIMAL CRUELTY.
Mary Bale, 45, from Coventry, was fined about $400 by District judge Caroline Goulborn for dumping a four-year-old tabby named Lola.
Read the full post here.
AGING VIXEN JOAN COLLINS APPARENTLY HAS A GIRL CRUSH ON ANGELINA JOLIE.
Proving that she's got either tunnel vision or suffers from age-itis, the senior British actress recently declared that Ang is the only beauty among today's Hollywood leading ladies.
"I have to say, there aren't that many good looking actresses around today,'' Collins said in an interview with Hello magazine. "I mean, there's Angelina Jolie and there's... Angelina Jolie."
"When I was young, everybody on screen was gorgeous," she sniffed. And don't forget, Joan: Everybody walked 10 miles to school, too.
Read the full post here.
ONE BY ONE, THE 33 MINERS TRAPPED IN A CHILEAN COAL MINE HAVE BEGUN THE PRECIPITIOUS CLIMB OUT OF THE DARK TOMB THAT HAS ENCASED THEM FOR TWO MONTHS.
Shortly after midnight, 31-year-old Florencio Avalos emerged first from the mine, setting off a cacophony of cheers and car horns. He hugged his wife and son and President, then gave the thumbs up sign as he was taken away from the scene on a stretcher.
Read the full post here.
WHEN IT COMES TO CHOOSING A PARTNER, THERE IS THE EXCEPTION AND THEN THE RULE.
The rule: most of us fantasize about being with a partner unlike our own.
A study published in late September found that the majority of men and women say they prefer different body types than that of their actual mates. Turns out few of us end up with our "ideal" types because "our ideals are usually rare or unavailable," according to University of Sheffield's Dr. Alexandre Courtiol, one of the authors of the study.
In real life, most men would prefer thinner mates. And while most women also want something different -- there's wider variation in their dream boats.
The exception to this rule: Victoria Beckham, who recently cooed an appreciation of "perfect" husband, British footballer David Beckham.
Read the full post here.
AFTER ALL THE HANDWRINGING OVER WHAT DAMAGE The Social Network would do to Harvard dropout and Jewish whiz kid Mark Zuckerberg, in truth the movie's catapulted Facebook's founder into rarefied air only occupied by saints and superheroes.
Out -- provincial ideas like the "truth" and "fiction" behind Facebook's founding in a Harvard dorm room.
In: the mythology of Zuckerberg as the tech epoch's master of the universe.
Read the full post here.
PROVING THEY ARE MORE FOCUSED ON THEMSELVES THAN THE MAN who made oversharing possible, the majority of Facebook's 500 million users stayed home this weekend rather than see a flick about Mark Zuckerberg.
Aaron Sorkin's The Social Network collected a respectable $23 million at the box office but the haul was less than expected.
Read the full post here.
WE CAN RESUME CALLING THEM SPEIDI AGAIN.
In what is the most anti-climatic celebrity story of the season, Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt have called off their divorce. Our sincerest hope is that the two will now fade into the fog of eternal bliss.
Read the full post here.
LINDSAY LOHAN'S LUCK RAN OUT FRIDAY when a Los Angeles County judge ordered her returned to jail to await an Oct. 22 hearing for violating terms of her probation.
The good news: LiLo looks great in orange.
Despite TMZ's rosy trial balloon prediction that Lindsay would "dodge the jail bullet," Judge Elden Fox denied Lohan bail and set the October court date to hear evidence on whether the startlet failed a mandatory drug test. And on behalf of all the invisible Joes and Josephines who don't have fame and privilege protecting them from harsher sentences, we thank you, sir.
Read the full post here.
JOAQUIN PHOENIX ADMITS THAT HE WAS "LOOKING FOR A BEATDOWN -- and I got one" -- when he sat on David Letterman's couch looking like a mainstreamed schizophrenic last year.
In his first visit to Dave since he appeared last year looking disheviled and doped up on thorazine, Phoenix apologized and admitted his visit was a "theatrical ruse."
The visit to Dave is a pivotal scene in Joaquin's recently released and oft-panned movie, I'm Still Here.
Read the full post here.
OOOOOOOOOHH, two days behind bars. It's so scary!
A judge has issued a bench warrant for Lindsay Lohan after she failed a court ordered drug test required as part of her probation.
The falling starlet faces 30 days in prison for each drug test she fails. TMZ has reported that LiLo has flunked at least two tests -- one for cocaine, and a second one allegedly for amphetamines, though Lindsay has previously had a prescription for the amphetamine drug Adderall.
Based on the 14 days she spent in jail for a 90-day sentence, Lindsay's likely facing two additional days for each offense. That'll teach her.
Read the full post here.
LINDSAY LOHAN'S PATHETIC BUT SHE'S ALSO EXHIBIT A IN THE ABSURDITY of placing drug addicts in prison.
Less than a month after she was sprung from court-ordered drug rehabilitation, the troubled actress admitted she failed a drug test after first calling those reliable celebrity chasers at TMZ "nuts."
"I am testing every single day and doing what I must do to prevent any mishaps in the future," Lohan tweeted Friday.
Read the full post here.
HEIDI MONTAG CELEBRATED HER 24TH BIRTHDAY AT THE Santa Barbara Zoo.
She was joined Wednesday by her Svengali handler, a hairy Spencer Pratt.
Sporting a nose bandage (another plastic gift to herself?), and suffocating boobs still in place, Heidi held hands and kissed her supposedly "estranged" husband.
Or maybe, finally, these merry pranksters are giving up on the stunt divorce concocted in a pathetic attempt to keep us guessing.
Read the full post here.
A PHYSICIANS' GROUP IS LAUNCHING AN ATTACK AGAINST THE BIG MAC.
The Physicians Committee for Responsible Medicine has released a commercial showing a obese dead man on a gurney clutching a burger. At the end of the 30-second spot, a woman narrator intones, "High cholesterol. High blood pressure. Heart attacks. Tonight, make it vegetarian."
Read the full post here.
THEY'VE SNAGGED TWO OF LA LA LAND'S hottest ladies so it only stands that actors Ryan Reynolds and Brian Austin Green should get some bump in the press.
Reynolds, 33, snared beauty Scarlett Johannson, and Green, 37, eloped in June to Hawaii with the smokin' hot Megan Fox. Now the two chaps talk about their work and famous wives in separate upcoming magazine profiles.
Read the full post here.
BY NOW THE HAUS OF GAH must be sweeping up the popped Cristal corks after celebrating their flesh-crawling creation.
Beef, it's what's for shocking.
But the next VMA is less than a year away and there's not a moment to waste concocting the next best jaw-dropping, eye-popping, hair-raising thang.
Addiction's like that: you just keeping have to increasing the drug once you start mainlining the stuff.
Kanye West's Masterful Mea Culpa.
Winning Big At The VMAs: Lady Gaga's New...Nose.
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SOMETIMES A**HOLES CAN'T HELP THEMSELVES.
That's the gist of Kanye West's Runaway performance at MTV's VMAs Sunday night. And yes, I'm using runaway as a double entendre.
Read the full post here.
THE SYMBOLISM IS POIGNANT: Lady Gaga has become just another piece of meat.
In the pop star's latest headline-grabbing stunt, Gah poses on the cover of Vogue Hommes Japan draped in what appears to be thinly-cut chuck steak. If she had been found caterwauling in the trunk of a car this way, the headlines would make a joke of her marinating in animal flesh.
Read the full post here.
JESSE JAMES AND HIS NEW SQUEEZE ARE ALL OVER THE TABS AND EACH OTHER.
"Yes, we date, duh!," Kate Von D told the world when the couple appeared together at her Wonderland Gallery opening.
Read the full post here.
THE SMELL WAFTING FROM LADY GAGA MIGHT NOT BE THE CREATIVE JUICES SEEPING FROM HER VAGINA but her desperation to be a star.
Check out On Newsstands Now: Lady Gaga Fears Creative Discharge.
Read the full post here.
LIKE A TRAUMATIZED CAR ACCIDENT VICTIM, KANYE'S FLINCHING AT THE APPROACHING VMAs.
The rapper had to make things right after embarrassing himself last year by ripping the mic from Taylor Swift's hands. So he purged his soul of the guilt and shame that followed after last year's outrageous antics.
"I'm reading to get out of my own way,'' he tweeted. "The ego is overdone...it's like hoodies." And anybody reading had to give him credit for his humor, sincerity and new-found humility if not his punctuation and grammar. (Hey, I'm not judging, just sayin'.)
With a few periods added, here's the unedited transcript of the 72 tweets over which Kanye's apology unfolds:
Read the full post here.
POOR RICH KANYE. MTV's approaching VMAs must be triggering post traumatic stress in the rapper who famously stole the limelight from the cotton candy princess Taylor Swift last year during the award show.
The pained poet has been nursing his own self-inflicted wounds all year and now has tweeted an apology along with muddled rationale for his bad boy behavior.
"I've hurt, I've bled, I've learned,'' Kanye tweeted during a marathon purge on Twitter yesterday.
Check out Transcript Of Kanye's Twitter Apology to Taylor Swift: 'I Became George Bush Overnight.'
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RACHEL UCHITEL'S GETTING A PROPER NEW YORK WELCOME after TMZ reported she's buying a three-bedroom prewar condo in The Griffon at 77 Park Avenue in Murray Hill.
"Being a vapid sk@nk has it's (sic) rewards,'' writes Sal Tessio in the comments of the metropolis' skankiest paper, the New York Post.
Check out Tiger Woods Takes Manhattan.
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MANAGERS AT THE SOCIAL NEWS SITE REDDIT HAVE THUMBED THEIR NOSES AT ITS PARENT company -- publishing giant Condé Nast -- by running a pro marijuana ad campaign for free.
The "Just Say Now" advertisement aims to influence the outcome of California's Proposition 19 which asks voters to legalize growing pot for personal use.
Facebook banned the same ad complaining the ad depicting a marijuana leaf violated its terms of service.
Read the full post here.
ARDI RIZAL'S KICKED THE HABIT.
The two-year old Sumatran boy was smoking up to 40 ciggies a day when a video of him sucking on a cancer stick hit the Internet in May.
Read the full post here.
BOTOX SHAREHOLDERS MUST BE FROWNING AFTER its maker Allergan agreed to pay $600 million in fines for "misbranding" the wrinkle-fighting product in sales to physicians.
Read the full post here.
TUESDAY'S NEWS BROUGHT US STARK ILLUSTRATION OF THE PHRASE, "IT'S A DOG'S LIFE."
We had dying dogs -- puppies casually tossed in a river by a teenage girl. And dyeing dogs -- pics of pups in China getting their hair colored.
If you needed glaring examples of the crap shoot that life is, these stories provided them.
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THE WORLD'S PLAYGROUND JUST GOT ANOTHER PLAYA: US Mag is reporting that Tiger Woods has snapped up a condo in downtown Manhattan, and some are assuming it's to be closer to his No. 1 mistress, Rachel Uchitel.
And If TMZ can be believed, the serial husband stealer is reportedly keeping her fingers crossed -- if not legs -- that Tiger comes hunting again.
Read the full post here.
THE WORLD LOVES CELEBRITY MUGSHOTS and Paris Hilton knows that.
After being dumped by the paparazzi who made Lindsay Lohan the queen of the tabloids, Paris Hilton's now back to earning headlines with her new arrest for possessing 'coke.' Only now we can add 'dumbest criminal' to her heiress title.
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IN A WAY, JOAN HOLLOWAY IS THE PERFECT metaphor for the London Fog brand: a snappy secret weapon you want handy during storms.
And so the iconic outerwear label smartly chooses Mad Men's Christina Hendricks to feature in its fall campaign.
"London Fog is a classic brand, which I love," Hendricks coos on command.
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IN A DESPERATE MOVE TO PROLONG THEIR 15 MINUTES ON THE WORLD'S STAGE, The Hills' stars Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt keep spawning dramas for the tabloids.
After Heidi announced that she plans divorcing her husband of one year, Spencer fired back, telling TMZ that he has a sex tape of Heidi that he'll release if she doesn't halt the proceedings.
The alleged sex tape features not just Spencer and Heidi, but Heidi and Karissa Shannon, half of the twin set that used to hook up with Hugh Hefner.
The faux drama continues with estranged husband and wife now snapped together in Costa Rica, where they reportedly fled to 'reconcile.'
"We're working things through," Spencer told MTV News. "Clearly I care for her, but the divorce is a superficial title 'cause I didn't cheat on her. And then she divorces me to clean her image."
Not only does Heidi want to clean her image but also her body.
She gave an interview to Life & Style saying she's still in severe pain from her many procedures and that she feels "trapped" in her body. She wants her G-cup implants out.
Heidi's latest pronouncement comes just a week after her plastic surgeon Dr. Frank Ryan died in a car crash. She told Life& Style that besides not being able to hug her dogs she can't live a normal life.
"I'm obsessed with fitness but it's impossible to work out with these boobs," she says. "It's heartbreaking. I can't live an everyday life."
Read the full post here.
The songwriter wrote Lion Sleeps Tonight in 1961 and it became a hit for the Tokens, then subsequently was covered by Robert John, Brian Eno as well as being featured in The Lion King.
"The song leads a magical life,'' Weiss one remarked.
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WEARING THE STUDIED GRIMNESS THAT IS DE RIGUEUR of fashion's sirens, Christine Staub makes her print debut in the September issue of Blackbook.
Staub is the teenage daughter of a certain debauched N.J. housewife rumored to have released her own home-grown porn. But for the sake of the woman-child, we'll not name her here.
Read the full post here.
THE SLICK PHOTO SHOOT DEPICTING MODEL AS AN OIL-SICK, BEACHED MERMAID brilliantly reveals the Gulf spill's stain on the world's consciousness.
The provocative 24-page spread in the August issue of Vogue Italia is triggering a wave of reaction, with some suggesting that fashion photographer Steven Meisel has veered into exploitation.
Of course he has. Isn't that what fashion photography is all about?
But these images of model Kristen McMenamy lying in pools of oil, coughing for air, remind us of the travesty that's taken place in the Gulf region more vividly than all but the photos of the region's sickened birds.
Read the full post here.
FANTASTICALLY TWEE. [fan tas ti ke li twi]. adj.
Origin: UK, pejorative.
1. Whimsy without wit.
2. Mimsy-mumsy sweetness without any kind of bite.
3. Overly quaint, dainty, cute or nice.
Ex: I find Audrey Hepburn fantastically twee.
And proving she doesn't have a twee bone in her body, Emma Thompson skewers the actress and fashion icon Audrey Hepburn with a jab, erroneously dismissing her as a "guy's thing." (Sorry, sister, she's a girl's fantasy.)
Read the full post here.
SPRUNG FROM HER DEVASTATING IMPRISONMENT (THAT'S SARCASM), Lindsay Lohan faces another 90 days of rehab. Afterwards she'll face the equally daunting task of rehabilitating her tattered reputation and career.
The troubled starlet was supposed to begin taping Matthew Wilder's Linda Lovelace biopic Inferno this month. He has said that he'll wait for Lindsay. "Not moving on, not re-casting, not under any circumstances," Wilder told a reporter after Lindsay was sentenced.
Read the full post here.
CONTINUING ITS DOMINION OVER A-LISTOPIA, VANITY FAIR'S September issue stars this minute's pop mania, Lady Gaga.
In the interview, which hits the newsstands August 4, Lady G reveals that she has deep, dark secrets, some of which she'll be glad to share.
First and foremost: Stephani Germanotta is "lonely," and she fears her deep wells of creativity seeping from her vagina if she has sex.
"I have this weird thing that if I sleep with someone they're going to take my creativity from me through my vagina,"' she tells contributing editor Lisa Robinson.
Read the full post here.
IN AN ELEGANT POLEMIC she wrote for the Washington Post for Easter 2008, Anne Rice's insoluble belief in God bolstered my own tempestuous faith.
"Look: I believe in Him. It's that simple and that complex," Rice wrote in opening her 1,100 word essay in which she recounts her baptism into belief.
Read the full post here.
MONSTERS! THEY'RE JUST LIKE US!
They grow up, grow old, fall in love, get married. Or if you're a celebrity monster -- specifically a Munster, you hook up with your "biggest fan" 50 years later and pop the question.
Butch Patrick, 57, who played the knickers-wearing wolfboy in the zany 1960s TV series The Munsters is engaged to a former Philadephia Eagles cheerleader with whom he corresponded with when he starred on the TV show.
"My first crush was Butch Patrick,'' retired pharmacist Donna McCall, 55, said in May.
Read the full post here.
CONFIRMING WHAT WE ALREADY KNEW INTUITIVELY, a new study concludes that the owners of iPads are selfish elites not prone to altruism. Which means you should think twice before sitting next to that guy browsing one on the airplane.
The consumer research firm MyType surveyed 20,000 people between March and May of this year and found that wellheeled iPad owners "scored terribly in the areas of altruism and kindness," Wired reports.
Read the full post here.
MAD MEL GIBSON CONTINUES TO GIVE NEW DEPTH OF MEANING TO THE PHRASE "CRAZY IN LOVE."
In the latest poisonous rant toward Oksana Grigorieva, Mel seems to suggest that accepting abuse is the duty of a woman in love. "You're not a f-----g woman I want. You can't hang,'' Mel tells the mother of his infant daughter Lucia. "...You don't know what the f-ck it means to make a man happy."
In seven secret audiotapes, the public has heard Gibson threaten, debase and accuse Oskana of not loving him.
"You f-cking don't love me one bit,'' Mel says on the audio released today by RadarOnline. As if loving him could change this story's ending; Oksana barely responds while Mel beats her with words.
Mel tells her he's sorry he had a child with her, calls her a "glum" and a "fickle c-nt," and in what has been a pattern throughout the audios, reminds her who owns the house she's living in. "And remember who's f-cking roof you're under! You ingrate bitch!," he yells.
According to RadarOnline, Oksana left Mel's Malibu house Feb. 18 and has not returned.
Thankfully, this latest audio runs only 2:27 minutes. Here's the full transcript:
"No One Will Believe You: Transcript Six Of Menacing Mel's Manic Meltdown.
Transcript Five Of Mel's Mental Meltdown.
Can't Look Away: The Fourth Transcript Of Mel Gibson's Descent Into Madness.
More Mad Mel: Transcript Of Radar's Third Secret Mel Gibson Audio.
'You Should Just F-----g Smile and Bloooow Me': Transcript Two Of RadarOnline's Mel Gibson Crazy Tirade.
Here's the Full Transcript Of Mel Gibson's Sickening Rant Released By Radar.
Read the full post here.
SEEMS MISS FIRE CROTCH IS GETTING HER NEW ROOMIES hot under the collar.
What Los Angeles Sheriff's officials dub as "no special treatment" is being interpreted by inmates at the Central Regional Detention Center as "special handling."
"All the inmates are sick of Lindsay," Maria Medina, a relative of an inmate, tells People.
Read the full post here.
THE SLUDGE KEEPS GETTING THICKER IN THE SLIME WRESTLE between Mel Gibson and Oksana Grigorieva.
Allegations of Mel's death threats and beatings now give way to claims of Oksana extorting money and falsifying injury.
TMZ reports that the L.A. County Sheriff's Department is investigating whether Oksana tried to extort money from Mel in exchange for keeping the disturbing audios of his abuse secret. "Extortion allegations have been brought to our attention and we are certainly going to be looking at that," a sheriff's spokesman says.
Besides the revelation that Mad Mel's touched in the head, the most shocking thing about this seedy soap opera is that Oksana's recorded evidence doesn't seem enough to protect her from suspicion.
Even the ersatz sophisticate Whoopi Goldberg seems to think that all Oksana had to do was call the police.
Read the full post here.
DOES SOMEBODY AMONG LINDSAY LOHAN'S CAGE KEEPERS have a script in a drawer somewhere?
Just three days into her expected 14-day sleepover in jail and the spoiled starlet's purportedly already getting special favor, according to reports.
"White Oprah" Dinah Lohan, along with baby sis Ali, showed up Wednesday for a visit. And on Thursday, LiLo's sometime-girlfriend Samantha Ronson popped in for some face time. Typically, inmates are only allowed to receive visitors on the weekends. When she was asked outside the jail how Lindsay's doing, Ronson sniped, "How do you think she's doing?"
Read the full post here.
THE FOLKS AT RadarOnline gave us a breather from Mel Gibson's verbal bazookas shot at Oksana Grigorieva. But today they were baaaaack with more bile and pestilence.
On the latest secret recording, Mel does nothing to dispute Oksana's claim that he hit her and the couple's baby, Lucia.
"You're acting as a crazy man right now," Oskana tells her baby daddy. "And you have been for many many months. And you hit me and you hit her whilst she was in my hands!"
Manic Mel responds: "You need a f-cking kick up the a-- for being a b-tch, c-nt, golddigging wh-re with a p-ssy son. And I want my child and no one will believe you.
What's increasingly apparent on the tapes -- beside Mel's general insanity -- is that he's got deep issues regarding male and female roles. Oksana offends his "maleness"; she needs to be his "woman." And he frequently uses his wealth to lord over her. "And I'm not giving you my house and you can rot! Unless you crawl back, suck my c-ck, and say you're sorry, in that order," he says on the latest audio. "You f--cking offend my fucking maleness, my masculinity, my being, my soul."
Transcript Five Of Mel's Mental Meltdown.
Can't Look Away: The Fourth Transcript Of Mel Gibson's Descent Into Madness.
More Mad Mel: Transcript Of Radar's Third Secret Mel Gibson Audio.
'You Should Just F-----g Smile and Bloooow Me': Transcript Two Of RadarOnline's Mel Gibson Crazy Tirade.
Here's the Full Transcript Of Mel Gibson's Sickening Rant Released By Radar.
Read the full post here.
FINALLY, THE JIG IS UP, LiLo.
By now you've been forced to trade in your ridiculous leggings for some eye-popping prison orange. So I've put together a few tips to help you survive your 90-day sentence.
1. Dye your hair brown. That white blonde you're rocking is going to clash wicked awful with the orange jumpsuit. And if you carry this off well -- who knows? -- you could spawn a whole new street style called Pokeywear.
Read the full post here.
WHOOPI GOLDBERG OPENED HERSELF UP TO SERIOUS RAZZING AFTER SHE had the audacity to defend Mel Gibson against charges that he's a racist.
The actor used the "N" word in his rant toward Oksana Grigorieva and last Monday Whoopi dismissed the clamor for his head on The View saying, "I know Mel, and I know he's not a racist. I have had a long friendship with Mel.
Read the full post here.
FATIGUE IS SETTING IN AND DON'T WE ALL WISH RADARONLINE would soon end their drip-drip-dripping of Mel Gibson's suicide poison? For crissakes, just end our misery in one final fell dose, please!
Okay, I'll speak for myself: my heart is wearier than it was before subjecting myself to Mad Mel's debasing language. And if weren't for my mild case of OCD and my need to be thorough, I'd discard this waste-less pastime. At least I tell myself this in lieu of whispering 'click ho.'
Surprisingly, if you listen very closely, on this fifth recording there's a sliver of silver lining for noncelebrities: Rich couples fight over money, too! And isn't that shocking at the same time affirming? You see? TMZ's right! They're just like us! Except with larger doses of delusion!
Without further ado, here's the fifth installment of Psycho: The Mel Gibson Story, compliments of RadarOnline and one Oksana Grigorieva.
Can't Look Away: The Fourth Transcript Of Mel Gibson's Descent Into Madness.
More Mad Mel: Transcript Of Radar's Third Secret Mel Gibson Audio.
'You Should Just F-----g Smile and Bloooow Me': Transcript Two Of RadarOnline's Mel Gibson Crazy Tirade.
Here's the Full Transcript Of Mel Gibson's Sickening Rant Released By Radar.
Read the full post here.
VIRTUAL RUBBERNECKERS CAN'T HELP BUT WATCH MEL GIBSON'S EMOTIONAL INNARDS SPILLED ALL OVER THE INTERNET HIGHWAY.
Shame on us, shame on me, but this is tragically compelling stuff and it's hard to look away.
We could spend the rest of our lives sifting through the remains of this shattered love story and still not know definitively what motivates these two people -- or, any two people really -- to love and hate.
Because I've started this fool's errand and I intend to finish it, here's RadarOnline fourth audio bombshell transcribed save for the first indecipherable phrase:
'You Should Just F-----g Smile and Bloooow Me': Transcript Two Of RadarOnline's Mel Gibson Crazy Tirade.
More Mad Mel: Transcript Of Radar's Third Secret Mel Gibson Audio.
Here's the Full Transcript Of Mel Gibson's Sickening Rant Released By Radar.
Getting Trippy On A Double Rainbow.
Read the full post here.
AREN'T YOU CURIOUS NOW ABOUT OKSANA GRIGORIEVA'S CAREER, OR "WHATEVER IT IS?"
The becoming Russian native was a tabloid cutout until I heard her voice on the audios she secretly recorded of Mad Mel. And how self-possessed and well-spoken is she? Pretty.
On the latest descent into horror, the subjects of Oksana's talent -- and music videos come up. So what to do but look her up on YouTube and the web?
As the couple tear into one another on the third tape released by RadarOnline, Mel insults Oksana's singing, telling her "that's how little I fucking think of your talent."
Read the full post here.
IN A CLASSIC CASE OF BEATING A DEAD HORSE -- IN THIS INSTANCE THE ABUSER IS MEL AND THE HORSE IS OKSANA -- RadarOnline releases yet another audio documenting the dysfunction between the star and his baby mama.
In comparison to the first two audios, this one's practically boring, with Mel's sins including calling his infant daughter's nanny a "wetback" and piling on Oksana his usual choice epithets: whore, cunt, bitch. His most stinging zinger here includes calling Oksana Grigorieva a "f----- mentally deprived idiot."
The mystery of why Oskana would tolerate such abuse is moot knowing that she was recording Mel for future posterity, i.e. perhaps evidence in any custody battle for her daughter Lucia.
Which brings me to Whoopi Goldberg's comments today on The View suggesting that Oksana must have had money on her mind when she recorded her crazy love. Seems like Whoopi hasn't paid too close attention to what the courts do in custody battles, which is essentially cut the kids down the middle and let the warring parents take a side. What sane mother would want some crazy motherfucker like Mel have custody? Only a recording like this would enable the courts see Mel's full on scary loony. That's just my take.
Anyhoo, here's the trascript of the third release from RadarOnline:
'You Should Just F-----g Smile and Bloooow Me': Transcript Two Of RadarOnline's Mel Gibson Crazy Tirade.
Here's the Full Transcript Of Mel Gibson's Sickening Rant Released By Radar.
Getting Trippy On A Double Rainbow.
Read the full post here.
HERE'S THE TRANSCRIPT OF RADARONLINE'S SECOND PORNOGRAPHIC RECORDING OF MEL GIBSON'S ABUSIVE AND MENANCING TIRADE TOWARD OKSANA GRIGORIEVA.
Who thought it was possible that Mel's sick display could be worse than that revealed in the first video released by Radar. But the second is worse, much worse, and reveals Mel insinuating that he'd kill Oksana. "I'll put in a fucking rose garden you cunt. You understand that?,'' Gibson says. "Because I'm capable of it."
The audio seems to capture Mel's violent reaction to Oskana's attempt to break away from him following his apparent assault on her that broke of her two teeth while she was holding their infant daughter. She tells him calmly throughout that he needs medication, that he's imbalanced.
"Because I'm saving my life and I'm saving daughter's life,"' Oskana tells Gibson, for the first time raising her voice. "That's what I'm doing. I don't give a damn about my music and I don't give a damn about you spending another penny. I'm saving her life." Moments later Gibson sneers at her with a mocking laugh.
Here's the transcript of the full eight minutes. Be forewarned that the last few minutes are hard to transcribe with 100 percent accuracy as the couple repeatedly talk over one another.
Here's the Full Transcript Of Mel Gibson's Sickening Rant Released By RadarOnline.
More Mad Mel: Transcript Of Radar's Third Secret Mel Gibson Audio.
Getting Trippy On A Double Rainbow.
Read the full post here.
GOODBYE WORLD CUP, WE HARDLY KNEW YOU.
Now that the world's celebration of football is over, I can't help feeling, sniff sniff, sentimental. I can't tell you a thing about the teams or any individual game -- you can read all about that here. But I caught the collective vibe that the world was sending, and it was nice that for once, America didn't dominate the field. For once, our hubris couldn't help us score.
The games forced Americans, or, I'll speak for myself -- me -- to broaden my insular world view.
Read the full post here.
MEL GIBSON'S POISONOUS SOUL IS ON FULL DISPLAY IN THE TWO MINUTE AUDIO RELEASED TODAY BY RADARONLINE.
After listening to the disease Mel spews at his baby mama Oksana Grigorieva, no misdeed seems out of the realm of possibility for the sociopathic Mad Mel.
He had a Hitler-loving father? Of course! He punches women? It's not stretch to think that he's hit every woman he's ever slept with.
The actor seems literally possessed as he rips into Oksana as his voice becomes increasingly rabid. He calls her breast implants "foreign bodies" and says "they look stupid, I'm telling you. It's just an appraisal. Keep 'em if you want. Look stupid. See if I give a fuck."
So far, Gibson's well-documented hatred has been aimed at women, blacks, Jews, and Vegas showgirls. Most of all, he's got to hate himself.
Radar released the exclusive audio Friday afternoon and it was later lifted by the website Gawker. RadarOnline's editor Dylan Howard said that any outlet publishing the exclusive audio had been served with a cease-and-desist order.
By late evening, word was out that Gibson had been dumped by William Morris Endeavor because he "used the n word."
Here's the audio where Mel snarls at Oksana that "you look like a fucking bitch in heat, and if you get raped by a pack of n-----s, it will be your fault."
Read the full post here.
THE THIN LINE BETWEEN LOVE AND HATE GOES 3-D IN THREE HIGH-PROFILE CASES IN THIS WEEK'S NEWS.
The Hollywood custody docudrama between Mel Gibson and ex-girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva continues to play out on the gossip pages. The couple are battling it out for custody of their infant daughter, Lucia. Last week secret tape recordings containing Mel's hateful rants toward Oksana leaked on the web, including one on which Gibson admits hitting the Russian singer.
"What kind of a man would hit a woman when she is holding a child in her hands, hitting her twice in the face?
Read the full post here.
IT'S TOUGH BEING A PROPHET IN YOUR OWN COUNTRY. Just ask Oprah or Paul the psychic octopus.
Goddamn German ingrates, threatening to eat the only octopus known to mankind to be able to predict outcomes, or specifically, the winner of six-out-of-six German World Cup games.
Here's a creature that humans didn't even know perceived football hegemony and he's accurately predicting wins!
And now that the Germans have been ousted by Spain, what do his bitter countrymammals want to do?
Cut off his head, chop off his tentacles, mix in a little soy and serve a miracle on a plate!
Read the full post here.
NICE JOB ON THAT JAIL SENTENCE, LOHAN. But in your pathetic haste to make more headlines you didn't stop to think of a few important things.
I know you're used to the posh, cushy Beverly Hills lifestyle, but suppose they don't have manicurists in LA prisons? And what if there are no pens with which to apply hidden messages to the prison guards on your acrylic fingertips? How, then, will you continue your campaign of innocence from behind bars?
Read the full post here.
BRITNEY'S BACK, BITCHES! Everybody's favorite pop tart graces the cover of the August Cosmopolitan. Or at least her head does, looking oversized and affixed to another person's body. Not because Britney doesn't have a good enough body -- she does. But because the photoshop job is horrifically bad.
Which brings me to Cosmo, Helen Gurly Brown's how-to-guide to stereotyping girls and life in general. Does Brit Brit adorning this tired mag mean she's already aging off the A-list? Come on, girl, make motherhood work for you the way Angelina does. Or does that require marrying up?
I am always glad to encounter like-minded commenters on the Internets, and I found no shortage of them at EW where the Brit cover was provoking spew. And I didn't even get passed the first page of comments!
"That is one ugly picture for a pretty pretty girl,'' writesBee. "Why does Cosmo like to disfigure its cover girls?
Read the full post here.
THE 3:56 MINUTE VIDEO SHOWS Lindsay Lohan explaining how she did everything required to fulfill the terms of her probation stemming from a 2007 DUI case. Her teary rationale came just minutes before she was sentenced to 90 days in the pokey for failing to attend alcohol education classes.
I can't even muster up the meh to launch a defense or attack against the starlet, but you'll find someone who agrees with whatever stance you're taking.
Read the full post here.
Because "death was very hard" for her to take, Jean Stevens simply ignored its grim realities when her husband, and then later, her twin sister died. After their burials, she had their embalmed bodies dug up and resumed life with them inside her house.
"Now, some people have a terrible feeling," Stevens told a reporter who paid her a visit at her "tumbledown" house. "They say, 'Why do you want to look at a dead person? Oh my gracious.' Well, I felt differently about death."
Read the full post here.
A BEST BUY EMPLOYEE IS LEARNING THAT IT'S DANGEROUS TO TICK OFF YOUR CORPORATE DADDY.
Have you seen the hilarious video above? It depicts a cartoon bear phone salesman becoming increasingly frustrated by a customer who won't even consider an EVO 4G over the iPhone 4.
"The monthly bill is cheaper,'' the sales bear tells the customer. "I don't care," she responds. "It fucking prints money,'' the salesman tries again. "I don't care." "It can grant up to three wishes even if one of those wishes is for an iPhone."
"I don't care."
And so it goes until the sales bear is ready to chop of his most precious body part. (Warning: the video is being called NSFW.)
Read the full post here.
MOLLY HAGERTY BETTER HOPE SHE'S GOT AL GORE'S SPERM SEALED UP IN A PLASTIC BAGGIE.
Hagerty, 54, is the masseuse who accuses the former Vice President of acting like a "sex-crazed poodle" and sexually assaulting her when she was summoned to his Portland, Ore. hotel for a late night massage.
That was in October 2006. But the details of Hagerty's so-called brush with the "big lummox" are only reach the public now. And if her account is true, well, "Call Me Al" Gore is just another leering politician with a sense of omnipotence.
But if Hagerty's account is false?
Read the full post here.
PROFESSED JESUS LOVER MEL GIBSON IS once again spreading his own virulent brand of Christian joy and and it's going to take more than a dozen Hail Marys to win our absolution.
The Catholic actor who once blamed Jews for all the world's wars has now been caught slandering blacks and using the "n" word.
Seems the actor-turned-director is a bullying prick behind closed doors whose terms of endearments include "whore" and "cunt." And thanks to the wonder of electronic surveillance, now the world knows for sure.
In conversations secretly taped by his baby momma, Oksana Grigorieva, Gibson spews venom at her.
"You're an embarrassment to me," the director of The Passion Of Christ tells the mother of his love child, Lucia.
You Should Just F-----g Smile And Bloooow Me": Transcript Two Of Radar's Audio Of Mel Gibson's Crazy Tirade.
Here's The Full Transcript Of Mel Gibson's Sickening Rant Released By RadarOnline.
Read the full post here.
THOSE CLAWS, THAT SNARL. Beware the fame monster!
Lady Gaga poses with a giant Polaroid of herself that the company presented to the MIT Museum. The photo becomes a part of the museum's Polaroid collection which includes 10,000 artifacts from the iconic company's history. The full collection is scheduled to go on display in 2013.
Gaga was named "creative director'' of Polaroid in January while Bobby Sager was appointed director yesterday.
"For 10 years, I haven't worked because I didn't find anything interesting enough," said Sager. "This collaboration with Lady Gaga is 'interesting' on steroids."
Read the full post here. IS IT TRUE? Is Larry King finally hanging up his suspenders and calling it a night?
Actually, I use the word "night" loosely here. With a guy his age, it's more like 4 p.m. But I digress.
Those are some mighty big shoulder pads to fill. Without him, who will ask the hard questions, like, "What's your favorite color?" Who will welcome the D-listers with such open arms as he has?
June 30, 2010
JUST IN TIME FOR JULY'S RELEASE OF SALT, ANGELINA JOLIE talks about life as mom to six kids and partner to the sexiest man alive in the upcoming Vanity Fair.
In exchange for the mag cover, Ang reveals character traits about the kids. And for once, she removes her superhero cape and admits that she's got her hands full with her brood and worries about having enough time for them in the future.
"It's easy when they're small and don't require much emotional support,'' she said.
Thirst-Inspiring: Angelina Jolie In Salt Trailer
Read the full post here.
THOSE MUFFLED CRIES EMANATING FROM AMERICA'S BEDROOMS THIS MORNING? Pubescent boys awaking to the news that fantasy conquest Megan Fox is officially off the market.
TMZ reports that the screen siren with the potty mouth made it official with longtime beau Brian Austin Green while vacationing in Hawaii. The couple met on the set of TV's Hope And Faith in 2004. "It was very hush hush.
Read the full post here.
IN A CITY WHERE GUNS HAVE BEEN BANISHED SINCE 1982, more than 80 people were reported shot in the last 10 days. And more than 200 have been killed so far this year.
That reality underscores the debate at the crux of gun control, which suffered a setback Monday when the U.S. Supreme Court effectively overturned Chicago's stringent handgun ban.
"Politicians are frustrated and they don't think of [the problem] logically," said Don Mastrianni, the owner of Illinois Gun Works, located just outside of Chicago. "They like to spout off about common sense. But where's the common sense when they write these regulations?
"Personally they have good intentions,'' he said.
Read the full post here.
THAT OSCAR IS ALIVE AT ALL BELIES THE OLD WIVES' TALE THAT BLACK CATS ARE UNLUCKY.
In fact, few felines of any color have ever been so blessed as the suburban London feline whose back paws were amputated in a farming accident.
The two-year-old "moggie" is lucky in several ways: he has owners who loved him so much they were willing to pay in excess of $3,000 for him to receive prosthetic paws and surgery.
And he benefited by proximity to the Eashing veterinarian who implanted the metal "pegs'' into his ankle bone.
"The real revolution," says veterinary "neuro-orthopaedic" surgeon Noel Fitzpatrick, is that Oscar's skin grew over the metal creating in essence "an extremely tight bone."
"We had to do a lot of soul-searching," Kate Nolan, the cat's owner, said on Fitzpatrick's website, "and our main concern has always been whether this operation would be in Oscar's best interests and would give him a better quality of life."
Read the full post here.
KATE GOSSELIN WAS GRASPING FOR AIR AFTER HER messy divorce, a house full of kids, a so-so samba with Dancing with the Stars, and the sudden death of her family reality show.
The crusty mommy needed change, a little pick-me-up.
So what does she do? Get a new haircut that will be criticized and analyzed by every cockamame two-bit blogger. No.
Worse: a Botox treatment that makes her look like Mr. Spock's wife.
US magazine reports that Kate was photographed on Monday showing noticeably smoother skin and
spiked eyebrows. Comparing pictures of the new Kate to the old Kate, Dr. Michael Olding of George Washington University's division of plastic surgery, concluded:
Read the full post here.
FAME MONSTER LADY GAGA falls to her knees in worship of her paparazzi in London. Because she knows that without them she'd be just a third-place winner in a talent contest.
Going Gaga For The Fame Monster: Lady G on Etsy
Read the full post here.
LADY GAGA IS A FRAUD!
That ain't her butt and those aren't her legs that she's wielding like weapons on the cover of the Rolling Stone. And never you mind the machine guns that she's cozying up to.
While bloggers frequently spank fashion magazines for photoshopping models, that same beautifying's going on here.
Gah's legs appear longer and less muscular than they look in recent pics of her strutting in ripped leggings to a visit to the New York Mets, where she sat in Jerry Seinfeld's box. Not that there's anything wrong with that.
Her little monsters are smart enough to know the real deal.
"Whatever artist was commissioned to Photoshop her butt needs to be fired," snipes LesleyBurt at the fansite Gaga Daily. "We should submit this to the Photoshop Fail blog. Sooooo horribly done, ew."
Read the full post here.
TEEN SENSATION JUSTIN BIEBER LIVES!
Or maybe not. Maybe he's lying dead in a gutter in Atlanta and his body just hasn't been found.
What we can categorically report is that the heart throb didn't die yesterday in Toronto from a suspected cocaine overdose as has been reported.
Rumors zipped through the Internets late last night that the 16-year-old Baby singer was found passed out in an Ontario home and was later declared dead at a Toronto hospital.
A counterfeit website mimicking Fox News claimed that "police reports indicate that illegal drugs, namely cocaine, may be factors in the young singer's condition."
But that was news to Toronto police "Constable Chan" who was on duty early this morning. He said he had received no such information about Bieber's death, and that "if anything big happens in Toronto, the Duty Desk gets notified." Personnel from the Toronto East General Hospital also poured water on the claims.
Good news, Justin! You get to live until the next rumor rockets 'round the web.
IT MAY NOT BE TODAY OR EVEN NEXT YEAR, but the day's coming when Abby Sunderland sobs aloud wondering if her parents loved her or notoriety more.
On Friday, hours after their daughter was discovered alive on her disabled 40-foot boat in the Indian Ocean, Laurence and Marianne Sunderland "offered no apologies” for allowing their 16-year-old daughter to attempt to sail around the world.
"We believe it's a parent's right to decide what their kids are capable of and for our family, we felt it was a good choice for Abby," said Marianne Sunderland.
Dad Laurence told reporters, "If people are looking at age, they're looking at the wrong thing here.
Read the full post here.
THIS MORNING'S DISH: NEWS, TAPAS STYLE.
Suspected sociopath Dutchman Joran Van der Sloot claims to know the location of Natalie Holloway's body, but some think the 22-year-old suspected serial murderer is just playing more head games to get back to safer ground in Aruba. In his latest recounting of Natalie's death, Van der Sloot told investigators that the Alabama girl died after falling and that his father helped him bury her body. Recent stories implicate Va der Sloot in the Netherlands seedy sex trade.
Read the full post here.
SO WHO'S THE MYSTERY MAN ON DANIELLE STAUB'S HOMEGROWN VIDEO?
Steve Zalewski, the ex beau of New Jersey's most reviled housewife, denies that he's the man on the homemade movie due out June 14th. Steve says the home porn he shot shows Danielle servicing him orally. He threatened to release the tape last year but Danielle got a temporary injunction from the court.
I reported last month seeing the tape depicting Danielle's pierced muff riding her mystery partner in a variety of positions. And though the voice surely sounded like Steve's to me, I'll admit that when somebody's throwing pussy at you and you're in the throes of lust, our growls and moans can sound alike.
Read the full post here.
GIZMODO HAS BEEN BANISHED FROM THE PARTY AND NO ONE IS SURPRISED.
When the expected ballyhooed unveiling of the 4G iPhone takes place at Apple's Worldwide Developers Conference keynote on Monday, the blog that let that electronic cat out of the bag won't have a writer in attendance.
Nick Denton's tech site reports that Apple has ignored its request to attend the meeting, touted as "the premier technical conference for developers innovating with Apple technologies." Consider it punishment for Gizmodo prematurely ejaculating all over Steve Jobs' plan for a controlled release of his latest prize.
Read the full post here.
WE PREDICT A BUSY DAY FOR DR. DREW TODAY AS WAGS PONDER THE MEANING OF KATY PERRY'S TWEETED BIRTHDAY MISSIVE TO HER BEAU RUSSELL BRAND.
Katy photoshopped her face on Russell's body on the current Rolling Stone cover.
"In honor of @rustyrockets birthday; film release! MY Rolling Stone Cover!," she exclaimed. But the bizarre photo could just as easily be a Rorschach test on the subliminal urges of the girl rocker.
Russell, starring in the just released Get Him To The Greeks, turned 35 June on 4th. The daffy twosome are engaged to become one later this year.
We could spend all day fingering through the DSM-IV for clues as to what disorder Katy's suffering. But who has time? And what would that reveal about me? Thus, we'll keep this pointless pastime brief.
Here, for your consideration, a few diagnoses:
Read the full post here.
THE PICTURES ARE SICKENING and provoke revulsion, rage and hopelessness in any decent human being who sees them.
Associated Press photographer Charlie Riedel took these photos of oil-sludged birds along East Grand Terre Island on the Louisiana coast. You can see the misery in the birds' eyes, and sometimes death approaching.
Read the full post here.
D.H. LAWRENCE COULDN'T IMAGINE RAPTURE MORE TORRID THAN THAT BETWEEN Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton.
Obsession, possession, consumption -- Liz & Dick thrilled for it all. And in its latest issue, Vanity Fair excerpts letters written to Liz by Richard Burton are included in the new book, Furious Love: Elizabeth Taylor, Richard Burton, and the Marriage of the Century written by Sam Kashner and Nancy Schoenberger.
The movie stars, both married to others when they became involved while working on Cleopatra, soon after divorced their respective spouses.
Read the full post here.
WANTED: HOT, YOUNG DUMB THING WITH A PENCHANT FOR POTTY MOUTH. NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY. MUST BE WILLING TO WORK UNDER EXTREME CONDITIONS.
Transformers' director Michael Bay has found his girl!
British model Rosie Huntington-Whiteley will play Shia Labeouf's love
interest in Transformers 3. The British model reportedly replaces Megan Fox in the action boobs and bombs movie franchise.
As soon as word was out that Megan had "quit" the gig, wags began speculating on her replacement and word was that Bay was considering several models. Other names that showed up on his "potential" included Miranda Kerr and Bar Rafaeli.
But for Bay, everything came up Rosie.
Outfoxed: Megan Fox Scrambles To Set Record Straight On Who Nixed Transformers Role.
Megan Fox's 10 Most Fearsome Quotes.
Megan Fox Gets Stupid, Proves She's No Angelina.
Read the full post here.
POOR VANILLA GORILLA. His cheatin' heart is the fault of a thug daddy who beat and humiliated him as a kid.
Of course, daddy Larry James's denies those stories and is telling folks he "would have died" before hurting his children. Calls Jesse "the apple of my eye."
"I think he made these allegations because he's told so many lies for so many years about his childhood," James professed to Radaronline, and his ex-wife is backing him up. It's too bad for him that now his daughter says Jesse's claims are true.
In his first interview since being outed as a serial cheater and Nazi poser, the Monster TV star claimed his father broke his arm and generally scared the eff out of him when he was a kid.
Read the full post here.
SO NOW WE KNOW: THE COMMONER WHO GOT KICKED OUT OF THE PALACE HAS TO SELL HER SOUVENIRS.
There's no excusing Princess Sarah Ferguson for selling access to Prince Andrew for a hefty pile of dosh. But that'll happen when you give a commoner taste of royal privilege, then banish her with a paltry $20,000 divorce settlement.
A British tabloid recorded the Duchess of Debt soliciting $723,000 from an undercover reporter who pretended he wanted favor from the Prince.
Prince Andrew is Britain's UK's Special Representative for International Trade and Investment.
Read the full post here.
SEMEN WHISPERER PEREZ HILTON is getting desperate.
With his name being bandied about as a possible replacement for Simon Cowell, and with Simon himself blowing back props to him, the queen of mean says he'd replace the exiting judge for free.
"I've shamelessly been campaigning for the job," Perez tells MTV news. "And I am adamant and I believe I would do a great job. Plus -- I'm not even joking, I would work for free the first season. After that, then we can talk about a fair paycheck."
Perez won't need the jack if he sells his heavily trafficked internet real estate. He's been offered $20 million for Hollywood's most despised blog.
A collective gurgle went up over at MTV.com at the idea of Perez replacing Simon.
Read Who Will Replace Simon: Speculation Runs From Ridiculous To Ingenious
Read Lee & Crystal Worthy Opponents In Idol Final.
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CONSPIRACY THEORISTS (i.e. me) are speculating about the curious timing of the just-released topless snaps of the radioactively hot Mega Fox.
Megan's publicly pouting over the pics, taken while she played an angelic circus freak in Passion Play with Mickey Rourke. But isn't their appearance the perfect ruse to distract from the brouhaha over who quit whom -- Megan or the Hitleresque director Michael Bay?
"It was her decision not to return,'' the starlet's mouthpiece told People. "She wishes the franchise the best."
Read the full post here.
LIKE EVERY OTHER GAME THAT INVOLVES BIG MONEY AND GOVERNMENT, THE OIL GAME IS RIGGED.
No matter what industry we point to, the circle of influence is closed. It begins with investors pursuing wealth, snares academics and businessmen profiting off special knowledge, then proceeds to government officials perpetuating their individual power and the industrial complex.
There is no place at the table for independent watchdogs, the "public interest" or a population scrambling to pay bills or buy toys for which demand has been created.
Seduced by power, public officials are forced to chase donations for million-dollar re-election campaigns, the bulk of which comes from monied "special interests" who pay to play.
And who profits directly?
Read the full post here.
EW HAS A PIECE EXPLORING THE PRICETAG of celebrity mistressdom, which so far has bagged only a few couple hundred grand for most of these objects of sex obsessions.
That's more than these ladies (cough, cough) would get collecting dollar tips from dirty hands while pole dancing at strip clubs.
But if the reports are true that serial husband-stealer Rachel Uchitel pocketed $10 million (minus the Gloria Allred's lawyer fees), then the proof's in the putang that hos who represent themselves have fools as agents.
Read the full post here.
RESERVE ONE IN MY NAME, PLEASE?
Digitimes says 24 million 4G iPhones will be shipped in 2010 starting next month. The device will reportedly be officially unveiled June 7th at Apple's Worldwide Developers Conference.
The existence of Apple's next generation iPhone was revealed when some sorry beer-swilling engineer lost a prototype in a California bar and another schmo found it and sold it for $5,000 to Gizmodo.
The irreverent tech blog, part of the Gawker chain, then raped that machine, photographed the assault and laid it out bare on the web. This, despite calls from the grand wizard himself, Steve Jobs, trying to get his baby back.
Digitimes reports the updated device seeks to address battery issues that hampered appeal of earlier generations, and will incorporate a 960×640 resolution.
Read the full post here.
ONE OF THE GRANDADDIES OF HEAVY METAL, RONNIE JAMES DIO, DIED today after a six-month battle with stomach cancer. He was 67 and had recently undergone his seventh bout of chemotherapy .
The dark conscience of the metal science, Dio was well known for flashing the devil horns in concert, something he said he picked up from his Italian grandmother who used to do it ward off evil spirits, according to Wikipedia.
Read the full post here.
EVERYBODY'S TALKING ABOUT HOW IT'S ALL "Miley and Justin…sitting in a tree…"
Oh please. She had sushi with a fellow little underaged tater tot. That's all this is. Well, maybe they'll swap some hair tips too. But that's it, really. And Justin's an appropriate playmate for a 17-year-old, unlike the 44-year-old Adam Shankman whom she gifted with a lap dance last summer.
Read the full post here.
O M G, NOT ANOTHER ONE.
What is it with this renewing of the vows? What does it all mean? Am I supposed to do it now?
It's must be catching.
On April 30, those crazy kids Mimi and Nick renewed their vows for a third time.
And just this past weekend, Heidi Klum and Seal did it for a sixth time. "It's our time -- a lovely family time," Klum explained to Redbook. "It's about remembering this moment of love we gave to each other and reinforcing it."
Thwarting rumors of impending divorce, Tori Spelling and husband Dean McDermott also recoupled Saturday in a private Beverly Hills ceremony. Tori wore white and kissed her husband "passionately" after the ceremony.
Read the full post here.
YOU KNOW THAT SLUT IN HIGH SCHOOL WHO DIDN'T GIVE A TWIT what all the good girls said behind her back?
The one who traded rides on the joy stick with the boy who got the brand new Jeep for his 16th birthday? And then dumped him when the boy from the next town over showed up in the BMW?
She grew up to be Rachel Uchitel.
Seems Tiger's No. 1 ho -- the one he was dreaming of when he slammed into a fire hydrant while hopped up on Ambien and Vicodin late Thanksgiving night -- had traded up when she met Ti.
Radaronline's published text messages that it says are between Uchitel and married Bones star David Boreanaz when the actor's wife was only days away from giving birth to the couple's second child.
Read Tiger Woods Falls Prey To The Chase For Magic Pussy.
Read the full post here.
Poor Courtney Love. The hole in her heart was like a sieve yesterday as she spilled boy tips and mommy dearest denials to estranged daughter Frances Bean on Twitter.
Pour Courtney. Because as much as she blathers on about how she loves and misses Frances, and how that girl should never, ever settle for a beta boy, she's made such a fucking mess of her life that you grant her an audience at your own peril.
Thus, I've put you notice that what follows are the rantings of a sad, confused, pathetic, deluded, miseducated, desperately needy mind.
Continue reading "Courtney Love Twitters Dating Tips & Legal Plea to Estranged Daughter" »
Read the full post here.
LEGENDARY SINGER LENA HORNE, WHO BROKE COLOR BARRIERS BOTH ON AND OFF SCREEN, DIED YESTERDAY AT AGE 92 IN NEW YORK.
Horne, who began singing at the Cotton Club in Harlem at age 16, was the "radiantly beautiful sepia girl" who became the first African American performer to sign a multiyear contract with a major Hollywood studio. But in an age when Jim Crow laws dominated, Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer mismanaged her talents, plopping per performances into movies in which she had no part of the storyline.
Read the full post here.
SO, WAIT. AM I HEARING THIS RIGHT?
That Bret "Love The Dirty Ladies Til I Die" Michaels is contemplating marriage to Kristi Gibson, the mother of his children? So does this mean that his doctors might actually have FIXED his brain, or…?
"As painful as this experience has been, I was given a second chance, right?,'' Michaels said. "I don't want to sit around every night worrying this is going to happen again. What I want to do is make a positive bucket list and say, 'I'm just gonna go for it.'
"There's just so much more I want to do and experience," he continued. "[Getting married], for sure, is something I have never done. Kristi's such a great person. We'll see if that happens. But yes, that may be one of the big things on the list."
Well, I guess this makes some sense. I mean, when all your interactions with women revolve around booze, hair-pulling, sharing greasy eyeliner, crying jags, more booze, stripper poles, implant popping and still more booze, the whole "wild rocker" thing is likely to get the best of you.
Read the full post here.
THE LEGAL UNTANGLING REMAINS, BUT ELIN NORDEGREN AND SANDRA BULLOCK are slowly leaving their tattered marriages behind while finding solace with their wee ones.
Elin's been photographed in her native Sweden jogging without her wedding ring, which she discarded shortly after Tiger's sexual peccadilloes became public. Her two children, Sam and Charlie, are reportedly with her and the rehabbing of her new house is proceeding at a furious pace.
Though the paperwork hasn't been filed, talk is picking up pace that a divorce is inevitable and imminent. Is Elin just biding her time due to contractual obligations?
Read the full post here.
A STRING OF RECENT SUICIDES AMONG THE WORLD'S SUPERMODELS IS PROVING that good looks, money and the admiration of others is not enough to make you happy.
Top male model Ambrose Olsen hung himself Thursday, April 22, according to the blog Modelwhispers. Olsen, 24, had appeared in print ads for design heavy hitters including Hugo Boss, Burberry, Louis Vuitton, and Armani Exchange.
That same day, Colombian supermodel and television presenter Lina Marulanda jumped off her 6th floor balcony and fell to her death.
In November of 2009, 20-year-old South Korean model Daul Kim was found hanged in her Paris apartment.
Read the full post here.
HERE'S THE THING ABOUT HALLE BERRY'S BREAKUP WITH Gabriel What's His Butt:
I can't feel sorry for her. Even with a dud like Catwoman under her belt. Because the fact is, this is old hat for her. And isn't she lucky that, as one of the Lucky Straights, she gets the chance to fuck up marriage -- though technically THIS time she wasn't married -- over and over again?
I can't really give two shits about celebrity breakups because they make up/break up every ten minutes and it's getting old. Also, there are bigger issues around marriage and relationships that should have our attention, don't you think?
Read the full post here.
ANY SECOND NOW, WE'LL HEAR DINA LOHAN exclaiming that everybody's making a big deal out of Lindsay putting a gun to her mouth and then tweeting the picture.
"She's just a kid!," she'll wail. "She's under a lot of pressure! Leave her alone!"
To which somebody, anybody, should tell her to fucking wake up, get a grip. That she's displaying the most blatant example of enabling that Hollywood's seen this ratings season.
Read the full post here.
SANDRA BULLOCKGETS A HOLLYWOOD ENDING TO HER MARITAL DRAMA.
After two months of living in secret, the actress reveals to People that she's adoping a baby -- and ending her tulmutuous marriage to Nazi sympathizer Jesse James.
After news that her husband had a series of affairs with tattooed tricks, the Oscar-winning actress went in hiding. Now she emerges with a brand new baby boy, Louis Bardo Bullock, named after jazz musician Louis Armstrong.
Talking like a proud mama Sandra told the mag, "You wake up, you feed, you burp, you play, you do laundry ...I'm still in that stage where I'm just amazed with him and at life."
People also posted Jesse's reaction to the news: "The decision to let my wife end our marriage, and continue the adoption of Louis on her own, has been the hardest.
Read the full post here.
THE BAD NEWS IS THAT BRET MICHAELS HAD A BRAIN HEMORRHAGE. THE GOOD: it wasn't from syphilis.
No, it's not from a bus accident or a stripper pole impalement.
It's not a broken heart from a rose with a thorn.
It's not anything he deserved.
Read the full post here.
HERE'S CHRISTINA AGUILERA FEIGNING EMPATHY ABOUT SOMEBODY ELSE'S WORLD during an interview to promote her latest project Bionic.
She's parroting her prepared lines, something about stepping into somebody's world, and seeing what they and their music are all about. Then somebody coughs softly in the background. Which apparently is not allowed in Christina's world.
"Ahh. Coughing during my interview, really?," she sniffs, then cackles. "Shoot him!"
And then just like that she resumes her self-indulgent patter.
"I want to step into their world and then combine that with my sound and my vision for the record. And it was magic, it was pure magic."
Via Gawker.
IS LINDSAY LOHAN WASHED UP AT 23? Or maybe instead of work she just produces her own daily drama?
Today's melodramedy? Wags report that Lilo tossed a drink on ex-lover Sam Ronson at LaLaLand's Trousdale last night, which left the fading star swearing off clubbing later on Twitter. "Last night -- never again -- believe it or not she's done with the club scene i've learned my lesson-sometime's it just takes a glimpse of reality."
Just days ago, the Twittering starlet was dropped from the movie The Other Side shortly after despised daddy Michael Lohan brought police to "to intervene" at her apartment. Seems daddy was worried that big sis was corrupting 16-year-old sister, Ali.
Read the full post here.
THE INTERNET IS AN ADDICTIVE SINKHOLE THAT USERS INCREASINGLY SUBSTITUTE for relationships, television and other pastimes, suggests a study by the University of Maryland.
Though reports on the research were spare in specifics, the study found that students displayed classic signs of withdrawal -- craving and anxiety -- after foregoing the use of all new media for 24 hours.
"The dependency is sickening," one student allegedly said.
Read the full post here.
LARRY KING'S FREAKY, KATE GOSSELIN IS WEEPY, Charlie Sheen is off his rockin' detox and Kate Hudson has new bffs -- "breast friends forever." Admit it: isn't life boring without the wags?
The gossip hounds are still baying over claims that CNN's suspendered talker is a "freak" in bed. That's according to confessed adulterer and little league coach Hector Penate who got tangled in his own tryst with Larry's wife, Shawn Southwick. The ball boy fell into bed with Mrs. King in 2007 two weeks after they met. Penate coached King's two young sons in baseball. But, according to Penate, King "didn't even care because he was so in love" with Shawn's wife Shannon.
Read the full post here.
WHEN ALL THAT'S LEFT OF HER IS A PRETTY CORPSE, NAOMI CAMPBELL'S SOUL WILL DEFINITELY NOT FLOAT HEAVENWARD.
The notoriously hotheaded model got punchy today with ABC's cameras when asked about a "blood diamond" that she was allegedly gifted by henchmen for the former Liberian President Charles Taylor, according to the New York Post.
Campbell stormed out of a chair while being interviewed and smashed a camera being held by a producer as she fled.
Taylor will be tried in the Hague for war crimes during what the Post called a "diamond-fueled campaign of terror over the Liberian border in Sierra Leone."
SAFE ACROSS THE THE ATLANTIC, THE NATURAL DISASTER WREAKING HAVOC in Europe's skies seems like a million miles away.
Iceland's Eyjafjallajökull (ay-yah-FYAH'-plah-yer-kuh-duhl) volcano continues to spew ash, shooting plumes as high as six miles in the sky, and grounding airlines in the largest air traffic shutdown since World War II. Millions of travelers continue to be stranded across the globe.
The volcano erupted on April 14th, and as of April 18th, 63,000 flights had been cancelled.
The eruption has also heaped opportunity on photojournalists who have snapped spectacular pictures of ash plumes over Iceland. But pictures from the ground prove scarier.
Above, dairy farmer Berglind Hilmarsdottir wears a gas mask as he travails to find his missing cattle. The Associated Press reveals the harrowing scene Saturday in Nupur, Iceland.
KATHY GRIFFIN IS BRINGING AWARENESS TO CERVICAL CANCER by getting a pap smear live on her show My Life on the D-List.
This is not a joke. I don't know what is more shocking: the funny lady getting the papsmear by the pool, live on TV -- or seeing her bikinied body with ribs sticking out and a hint of her vajazzled vajajay below the bikini line. "Tell cancer to SUCK IT!," Kathy heralded on Twitter.
Read Haters, Why You Gotta Begrudge A Girl's Vajazzle?
Read The Vajazzling Kathy Griffin Overshares For A Good Cause.
Read the full post here.
THE SEISMIC WAVES buckling terra firma around the globe are also upending Hollywood couples.
Larry King has filed for his 8th divorce from his 7th wife -- he married wife no. three two times. The rumored reason: the 76-year-old talker was shagging his sister-in-law. Both he and Shawn Southwick, 50, filled competing papers Wednesday, and though gossips reported yesterday that the breakup may be on hold, Larry's lawyer told People that the split is "proceeding." If it goes through, Shawn will be entitled to half of Larry's reported $144 million fortune. For Larry's sake I hope the couple kiss and make up; I'm not sure he has the strength to go through another wedding, divorce and more babies. At 76 years, Larry, isn't it time to retire?
And In the category of "that was fast," Mel Gibson and his baby momma Oksana Grigorieva have quit their two-year relationship.
Read the full post here.
IN WHAT CAN ONLY BE CALLED A BRILLIANTLY EXECUTED counterintuitive ad campaign, everybody's favorite reformed Pop Tart has released pics depicting her "before" and "after" the magic of Photoshop.
The snaps of Britney Spears wearing a pink polka-dotted bathing suit were taken during a shoot for Candies and have already flooded the web. They first showed up on the U.K.'s Daily Mail, which claims Brit "allowed" the pre-airbrushed images to be used "ALONGSIDE" (their capitalization) the altered ones so people could see the difference.
And therein lies its brilliance: it allows Brit and Candies to have its cake -- Brit showing flesh in a pink-heavy campaign to appeal to girlies -- all the while eating it too -- being heralded as "courageous" for showing cottage cheesy thighs, buxom rump and bruised legs.
Read the full post here.
LORDY, LORDY, IS LADY GAH SENDING MIXED MESSAGES.
In a public appearance in support of Mac's Viva Glam Campaign, the living 3D cartoon superhero sent word to all her little monsters that it's okay to be chaste.
"I can't believe I'm saying this -- don't have sex,'' she reportedly uttered. "I'm single right now and I've chosen to be single because I don't have the time to get to know anybody. So it's OK not to have sex, it's OK to get to know people. I'm celibate, celibacy's fine."
If the subject weren't so serious, we'd surely point out hard it'd be for any suitor to find his/her way through the feathers, straps, chains and leather with which she adorns herself. But it's real news when pop's reigning boundary breaker preaches sexual control, even if the announcement will surely feed frenzied speculation over her alleged hermaphroditism.
Read the full post here.
AS TIGER WOODS RETURNS TO GOLF, NEWS about his sexcapades continue to dribble out. Another girl's come forward, this one the daughter of a neighbor whom he has known since he was 14. Raychel Coudriet, now 22, apparently got her panties in a twist when the news first broke about Tiger's prowling. "I felt used and violated, like I meant nothing to him but a night of casual sex," Raychel reportedly said. "I wanted to dig a hole, crawl in and die." Oh, shut up. Nobody cares anymore about how many women Tiger slept with. We lost count at…10.
While Ti's proving he's still master of his domain -- at least at the Masters -- his seedy pastimes were literally casting a shadow over his game. A plane flew over Augusta National with a banner that read: "TIGER: DID YOU MEAN BOOTYISM?," a jab at Woods' alleged return to his Buddhist faith, which he said he'd "drifted away" from during the past years. So far at the Masters, though, it looks like prayers to Booty are paying off for the errant husband and playboy.
Read the full post here.
TO THOSE UNSCHOOLED IN THE EUPHEMISMS OF WAR, there is no dispute that the Iraqi men gunned down by Crazyhorse One-Eight of the U.S. Military were murdered.
Armed with no weapons visible at least to the untrained eye, and paying no attention to an Apache helicopter flying overhead, the men are relaxed as they gather on a clear Bagdad day in an area where there had been exchanges between the U.S. military and Iraqi insurgents earlier in the day. Two Reuters journalists, one carrying a long-lensed camera, walks among them.
Up in the sky, two military men saw something entirely different: Armed enemy combatants. They report to commanding officers seeing "five to six individuals with AK-47s" and request permission to "engage." Permission granted.
"Just fuckin', once you get on 'em, just open 'em up,'' says one American fighter. Bullets from a 30 millimeter cannon fire rip through the air. Within minutes, the human targets are dead. "Oh yeah, look at them dead bastards," says the shooter. One of the injured tries to drag himself away. Minutes later, a van pulls up, a man gets out and tries to help the injured man inside.
Read the full post here.
DON'T YOU LOVE THE FORMER TATTLE-TELLING BODYGUARDS OF A-LIST CELEBRITIES?
We've all seen the wondrous Angelina Jolie performing charitable work or parading her faux merry brood before the paps. And after keeping twins Vivienne and Knox under wraps for nearly two years, Ang is putting out her own Good Morning Italy by posing on hotel balconies, riding in gondolas and taking strolls with her beauteous family as she makes a flick in Venice.
But don't delude yourself into thinking you're seeing the real Angelina as a former bodyguard spills to InTouch what she's really like when the cameras aren't around.
"Angelina has a public and a private persona,'' the tattler reveals."In my opinion, the real Angelina is self-centered and a control freak. She has no patience at all. She doesn't do things out of the kindness of her heart. And she's totally psycho…she screams and yells a lot, then walks away.''
Read the full post here.
IT TAKES HERCULEAN EFFORT TO TRUST AGAIN after gaining glimpse into a duplicitious soul. And so the day after Tiger Woods' mea culpa conference, there remains the question of just how much he meant of what he said.
The greastest golfer on earth took center ring Monday and led a near-perfect pitch confessional press conference, coming off as an assiduous practitioner of the 12 steps.
He once again admitted his transgressions, apologized for complicating the lives of other golfers, told us that he's returned to prayer through meditation, and reminded us that his journey to recovery from the unnamed elephant in the room is an unending process.
Read the full post here.
JESSE JAMES FLEES REHAB AFTER REPORTS SURFACE THAT MOVING TRUCKS WERE SPOTTED at the Seal Beach, Ca. house he once shared with Sandra Bullock who is assuredly seeking divorce from the cheating monster. "She is over him," a friend tells US Weekly. With evidence mounting that Sandra will no longer be Jesse's girl, the reality TV badboy's lawyer is pleading his case. "He's a broken man,'' Attorney Joe Yanny tells TMZ. "The single most important thing to Mr. James and the children is that the marriage somehow survive." Shouldn't he have thought of that before he threw his monkey wrench around?
Madonna sets up her 13-year-old daughter Lola with her own Macy clothing line. The "Material Girl" is purportedly designed by Lola who gets her inspiration from dance classes, her favorite rock bands and, um, aging rock stars? Madonna coos about Lola's sense of style but she wishes she would "dress more conservatively." Spoken like a true mum. Meanwhile, the original Material Girl parties in London with her 23-year-old boy toy Jesus Luz in tow. Heel, Jesus!
Read the full post here.
KIM ZOLCIAK is putting distance between herself and rumors that she's swinging both ways. The make-pretend housewife from Atlanta's Housewives wants the world know that she is not a lezbo and that she is certainly not muff chomping DJ Tracy Young, the same DJ who produced a remix of her Tardy For The Party .
"We were intimate -- but just once," Kim tells Perez. "I was on a break from Big Poppa. But I'm not into girls."
Read the full post here.
"ONLY I WOULD GET PUSHED INTO A LARGE, SHARP PLANT BY CRAZY PAPARAZZI!!! I need to start wearing more flats."
Lindsay Lohan Twittered to the world in an effort to seek sympathy for her recent consecutive falls and powder-in-shoes faux pas.
Poor Lilo's been ridiculed in the press for her recent mishaps and George Lopez insinuated the powder was coke.
That made Lindsay puffin' mad. She slammed the comedian on Twitter, then George did was any selfpromoting talkshow host would do: He invited her on his show. (Latest word: she's accepted.)
And all this drama over high-heeled shoes, the quintessential starlet's accessory!
In Lindsay's defense, no other fashion accessory has caused women more pain and suffering. But falling from six inches doesn't explain the fading star's recent out-of-control behavior which even led L.A.'s finest to consider seeking a psychological evaluation of her.
People close to LL are afraid for her life. Even her father held a news conference and blamed his divorce for his daughter's disturbing behavior.
But there is some good news: Lilo was spotted wearing ballet flats in L.A. two days ago. That's a step in the right direction. Now if she would only take it easy with the powder and the drinks…
Madi S. is mom to two kids and three cats. She loves pop culture news, movies, fashion, travel, reading and observing the world.
AS MORE SORDIDNESS IS REVEALED ABOUT TIGER WOODS IN THE new issue of Vanity Fair, less titillating but unflattering details emerge that paint him as a cheapskate.
In the article written by contributing editor Mark Seal, ex-mistresses Mindy Lawton and Jamie Jungers paint Woods as a tightwad. Lawton said the only thing Tiger ever purchased her was a Subway chicken wrap sandwich. And Jungers admits that she broke off the affair because Tiger refused to help when she was in financial trouble.
That sentiment was echoed in a December interview I had with Peter J. Drake, who also used to work at the Perkins' restaurant where Tiger frequently dined with his wife Elin. "He always made it a point to say hi to her and bye to" Mindy, said Drake, 30, who described himself as very close friend of Lawton's.
Read the full post here.
LINDSAY LOHAN HAS HIT ROCK BOTTOM, literally.
In just a few short weeks, she was photographed falling face forward into a cactus, denied entry to a Victoria's Secret party, and got dumped from her charity gig on behalf of India for tweeting about saving 40 children in one afternoon. Even L.A.'s finest are reportedly considering committing against her will.
What's next for this unemployed former child star? White power coming out from her shoes. Of course all the wags think it's a perfect metaphor for her rumored coke-tinged life.
The Jesse James scandal continues to unfold.
Read the full post here.
IT'S TIME TO SPOTLIGHT ATTORNEY GLORIA ALLRED, famed justice seeker who's righting wrongs and wronging rights for aggrieved cheating "other" women everywhere.
Says Allred: "I take fire, and I give fire -- because I'm not a philosopher; I'm a warrior."
Don't hold it against her that three recent clients are the mistresses of Tiger Woods and Jesse James, outlaws in the state of matrimony. 'Cause even deceitful fameballs are entitled to legal representation under our beloved Bill of Rights, at least until the current Supreme Court finds a way to void it.
Read the full post here.
SOMEBODY SOMEWHERE ONCE SANG A SONG SAYING WE DON'T NEED ANOTHER HERO, but that is so not true! We need all of them we can get.
And picking up the slack is Hayden Panettiere, who plays a hero not only on TV but in real life.
The 20-year-old looker who stars in the deliberately shamltzy series Heroes could spend her free time hitting L.A.'s nightclubs or New York's fashion shows. But does she? Nooo!
Rather, she devotes herself to trying to avert the slaughter of whales and dolphins by Japanese fishermen.
Two years ago, the actress was attacked as she tried to prevent the slaughter of dolphins along the coast of Taiji, Japan.
Read the full post here.
SO NOW THE WORLD KNOWS THE TROUBLE THAT IS JESSE JAMES.
Already four women have stepped forward claiming affairs with the self- proclaimed "Vanilla Gorilla," an ex-employee says he sexually harassed her, he's clashed with the paparazzi and has been purportedly offered $500,000 to pose for Playgirl.
And the saddest truth? He's more famous than ever before.
Psychologists everywhere have been answering the question of "why men cheat"? Here's my question: why bother getting married in the first place?
Read the full post here.
OUTLAW JESSE JAMES CAUGHT THE CHEATING SYNDROME.
Now the hole he dug for himself becomes a chasm. Like a déjà vu of the past months' headlines about multi-cheater Tiger Woods, more women are coming forward claiming having they slept with the married biker.
James' ex-wife Janine Lindemulder is spilling more details about their time together, and how she caught him when he sent a text message intended for another woman.
Janine, heavily tattooed just like James' playmate Michelle "Bombshell" McGee, says she feels sorry for Sandra for being fooled all these years.
Janine says that everybody around Jesse knew of his cheatin' ways.
Read the full post here.
THE HEADLINES SCREAM BEWARE OF THE OSCAR CURSE.
The recent reports state the theory that after an actress gets the most desired trophy, The OSCAR, she gets the boot from her significant other. It's more likely these ladies were married to some guys who couldn't deal with these ambitious, powerful ladies.
Let's look back at some of the the winners. Most recently is Sandra Bullock. That's a no brainer: her husband made headlines cheating on her a with a Nazi-outfitted posing stripper just days after she got the golden guy.
Another recent breakup is that of Kate Winslet and her husband-director Sam Mendes. That''s easy: he needed a new muse. (Rumors are that he got too close to his much younger leading lady, Rebecca Hall.)
Let's move on. Reese Witherspoon and Ryan Phillippe.
Read the full post here.
THE PRODUCERS OF Pirates of the Carribean 4 are looking for young models aged 18-25, with dancer-like bodies who can swim. But here's a catch, they have to have real boobs. Read the casting call: Must have real breasts. Do not submit if you have implants.
Hollywood is in panic. Heidi Montag is calling her plastic surgeon.
Don't try to fool them, they'll put you to test. Yep: You'll try on clothes, bounce around, then pass or flunk the jiggle-test.
If the silicone -free trend catches on, half of Hollywood is walking the plank!
Madi S. is mom to two kids and three cats. She loves pop culture news, movies, fashion, travel, reading and observing the world.
AND THE OSCAR GOES TO…JESSE JAMES FOR HIS ROLE AS good, adoring husband! Not that his forced smile gave him away!
On his way to the Governor's Ball after his wife won a best actress Oscar, Jesse declared with a tear in his eye, "She's beautiful. She's amazing. She takes my breath away. Sometimes I look at her and I do, I just lose my breath."
Was he talking about Sandra or his head-to-toe-tattooed girlfriend, Michelle "Bombshell" McGee?
The tabs say that the Monster Garage reality TV star was sexting McGee as recently as March 14th. Now he's issued an apology to Sandra and his kids, saying that the "vast majority of the allegations are untrue and unfounded." Really, then why's he apologizing?
And James' will soon have more to apologize for: TMZ says someone's shopping a pic of him wearing a Nazi costume and making a Nazi salute.
I can't stop thinking about Sandra Bullock's poor judgment in choosing a husband. Another 'sweetheart' heartbroken by a "bad boy." Come on! His ex-wife is a porn-star who spent time in jail, he has 3 kids with 2 different women. Sandra, you should have run at "hello!"
Madi S. is mom to two kids and three cats. She loves pop culture news, movies, fashion, travel, reading and observing the world.
ARE TIGER WOODS AND JESSE JAMES afflicted with the Madonna/Whore complex?
As the marital dramas play out between Tiger and wife Elin Nordegren, and James and Sandra Bullock, similarities between the couples suggest that both men might have psychological problems being intimate with the women they love.
In the simplest language, men who suffer from the Madonna/whore complex are sexually incapable of sexually loving their "good" wives due to their underlying belief that sex is debasing. To meet their sexual needs, these men pursue the "whore" with whom, once they have sex, is never good enough for marriage.
"In the mind of the sufferer, love and sex cannot be mixed…" according to Wikipedia. "He will reserve sexuality for "bad" or "dirty" women, and will not develop "normal" feelings of love in these sexual relationships.
Read the full post here.
THE INTERNET WAS A STICKY WIDGET this week with spillage from affairs of the rich and famous gone bad. Now it's official: Sexting is the new coin in the realm.
Notorious porn star and Tiger sex toy Joslyn James went Rambo and launched an Internet archive documenting sext messages Eldridge sent her. The texts include the most intimate language imaginable between whore and the world's most famous john. James appears to hold nothing back from a prying public: To wit: "I want you to beg for my cock. Kiss you all over to convince me to let you have it in your mouth." There's much more for those interested.
Then Sandra Bullock's creepy husband is exposed as slimy two-timer when tattoo model Michelle McGee tells In Touch that she's had a year-long affair with the reality TV star. The tabloid releases a press release touting Jesse James' text messages to McGee, which so far pale compared to Tiger's dirty talk.
Reports surface that McGee received $30,000 for her story and texts.
Perhaps not coincidentally, in a 2009 online study entitled, "Sexting…Is It All About Power?" carried out by RealPsychology.com, researchers concluded that "as a whole, sexters were more likely to strive for power and control than non-sexters."
And sexters with high "power profile" scores had "a strong desire for power, and may often take control in an abrasive or aggressive manner," according to the site.
The week's events bolster those claims.
FOUR YEARS AFTER SHE HAD HIM AT HELLO, GQ delivers a revealing interview with the crazy at the center of John Edwards' storm.
Rielle Hunter, who turns 46 March 20th, invites a reporter over for a sleepover, confides details of her deceitful two-year sexual liaison with a presidential candidate who's wife has cancer, poses seductively on the resulting love child's twin bed with Kermit, Dora, Barney and a hoot owl, then cries "repulsive" when the pictures go meta.
The media had a field day Monday mocking Hunter's witless blunder. The Boston Herald snaps "Really Rielle? Get Your Pants On!" while Wonkette cracks, "RIELLE HUNTER IS NOW SAD! Jesus, did she think they'd Photoshop some pants onto her?"
Read the full post here.
THE FANTASTIC MR. FOXY Johnny Weir doesn't need no stinkin' Stars on Ice gig. That's for little girls and sparkly boy-wannabes. The fabulous Johnny's got bigger dreams: His own touring ice show with the Lady Gah!
Just days after reports hit the web that Weir was denied a spot on the U.S.'s only figure skating tour because he wasn't "family friendly," Johnny confirmed to Access Hollywood that the rumors were true.
"It is for real. I've never been invited to do Star on Ice before," Johnny told Billy Bush. "It's disappointing that I can't perform for my American fans…
all because I'm not 'family friendly' enough."
Read the full post here.
IT'S ALL PART OF THE PLOT:
Lady Gack goes to L.A. Airport for an international flight wearing a tulle veil and dark shades and refuses to remove them for security, prompting a full body search and provoking bondage fantasies for her fans.
And it all happens just in time for the release of her new video!
Telephone, featuring Beyoncé, made its web debut Thursday, prompting Gaga's little monsters to slobber and wet their panties.
The video depicts Lady G being tossed into a prison cell and stripped searched by two butch prison guards. But she's not incarcerated for too long before Honey B shows up, bails her out and steers the Pussy Wagon on a murderous road trip.
The 9:22 video is cliche wrapped in camp shrouded in homage to 70s Blackspoitation, made-for-TV lesbian prison flicks, feminist outlaws Thelma & Louise and Quentin Tarantino.
"I told you she didn't have a dick,'' says one jailer after tossing Gags in a cell and strip searching her. "Too bad,'' says a second.
And with those quips, Gaga responds to the wags who've taken to publicly groping her privates with their tongues looking for a penis. But is it mere coincidence or something more when, seven minutes in, the refrain I don't want to talk anymore increasingly begins to sound like "I don't want to tuck anymore?"
Read the full post here.
LEAVE US ALONE!
Who are we? We're women who don't shave our legs. And -- surprise -- we're even happy!
We have boyfriends and husbands and even win Oscars.
It's kinda funny that Mo'Nique keeps having to defend her hairiness to the world. I guess she, like me, grew up without that stigma. We're about the same skin color, and her legs are much hairier than mine, but I'll stand with girlfriend any day.
I remember that it took years for Nair to have a black chick in one of its commercials. The models were still all white in the '80s.
When I was young, I never thought that Nair was for me or anyone I knew.
Read the full post here.
HOW VERY "NOW!"
In today's crazy mixedup world, when up is down and bad is good, Mattel brings to market the Barbie versions of Mad Men's Don and Betty, Joan and Roger.
When you look this good, who cares if you sleep around, have three-drink martinis and marry rapists or children beneath your station? Bored doll collectors-cum-housewives want to get in on the naughty too.
The new dolls will sell exclusively at AMCTV.com and BarbieCollector.com for $74.95 a pop. According to the New York Times, "The dolls come with period accessories like hats, overcoats, pearls and padded undergarments, but no cigarettes, ashtrays, martini glasses or cocktail shakers. "
For these swinging Barbies, it's BYOB.
DEAR JENNIFER,
Wow! You're smokin' on the upcoming cover of W magazine posing with fake lover Gerard Butler. I'm praying you two got sweaty and did the nasty right in front of photographer Steven Klein, the same snapper who recorded Mr. and Mrs. Smith playing dress up back in 2005. That way he can bear witness to the world, vouch that you've got a bit of your own sexual fire, even if ex-beau John Mayer didn't coin a term for you.
Girlfriend, I'm gonna give it to you straight: It's time to jump on the stick and start making baby. You just celebrated your 41st, and yeah, you've got lots of green. But even with all of LaLaLand's magic, you can't turn ovaries into fangirls and have them swoon at your command.
Read the full post here.
SINCE I HAIL FROM PHILLY, PART OF MY BLOGGING GIG IS TO SCRUTINIZE EVERY 30-something dark-haired, sharp-nosed douchebag I come across hoping to land a sighting of Arthur Kade.
Well, it hasn't happened yet and I don't think I could stomach it if it did. If you don't know Kade, he's a wannabe nominated by Gawker as "Douchebag of the Decade." He lost -- to Joe Francis of the Girls Gone Wild franchise, unquestionably a bigger douche.
But Arthur's still striving. Here's a little piece by Philly filmmaker Aymar Jean Christian that is highly amusing and a great take on the Kade phenom. Done documentary style with commentary from Philly editors, the short film showcases Kade in all his awesome obnoxious famewhoreness, proving once and for all that Kade is a legend in his own mind. Enjoy.
SexyChattyCatty is a regular contributor at CrabbyGolightly.com where she writes on TV, America's favorite snack food.
THE SNAPS ARE ARRIVING AND the votes for the winners and losers of the red carpet are in. (And I cast them all!!)
Standout of the night: Inglourious Basterds star Diane Kruger looking beguiling in a cream and black ruffled gown. I don't care what the Fugly girls say, she gets my vote.
Rachel McAdams shimmers in muted blue and violet sleeveless gown with flowing skirt. Her lack of jewelry punctuated her and the gown's beauty.
Meryl Streep looks stately in a simple white gown. Queen Latifa looked a long way from Newark, N.J. in a stunning satin mauve dress that had one baubled silver sleeve.
Kathryn Bigelow looked like a winner in a sleek gray silver gown dress. And Kate Winslet as usual gets high marks for her shimmering silver gown and eyepopping bling.
And so now I crown them winners of the red carpet!
AND DIDN'T WE ALL SEE THIS COMING? Note to expecting parents and the media: do not label young children with the nickname "Blanket."
California child welfare workers are back at the Jackson Family's Encino funhouse this afternoon to further investigate claims that Michael Jackson's youngest son was shocked by a stun gun. TMZ reports that investigators returned to question an employee who's been unavailable the last several days.
A tipster leaked to media outlets on Monday that Jaafar Jackson, 13, allegedly bought two stun guns off the web and had played with the guns for three days before being caught. He was allegedly found by security staff chasing Jackson's youngest son named "Blanket" with the gun. An attorney for the family denied the claims and said only one gun had been purchased and that it had been confiscated quickly.
Jackson's three children Prince Michael I, Paris and Prince Michael II reside with a coterie of cousins, aunts and caretakers in the house, including brothers Jermajesty, 9, and Jaafar. Their mother, Alejandra Oaziaza, bore children to both Jermaine and Randy Jackson. In addition to Jermaine's sons, she is mom to Genevieve, 20, and Randy Jr., 18, whose father is Randy Jackson.
STEREOTYPING IS ONLY ALLOWED ON THE INTERNET. Do not try this at home!
Perez Hilton
High schoolers who use Proactive.
TMZ
Trolls.
BuzzFeed
Frat boys who went to state colleges.
Salon
Voters who donate only to presidential candidates.
Gawker
Smart kids who ranked in the middle of their class.
Read the full post here.
WHAT'S WRONG WITH A GIRL WANTING TO FEEL ALL SPARKLY AND PRETTY? Or have things turned so upside down that fabulosity belongs only to the purview of boy skaters and vampires?
The Vajazzle (aka "vajazzler") is the glittery euphemism for applying glue to a Brazilianed pubis and then affixing tiny bedazzling rhinestones. It’s been both hailed as recreation for "Glittertwati" and dismissed as "a real hood rat ghetto sort of thing. Or a J Lo thing, which is maybe the same thing." It's also been called the modern merkin.
The trend went meta after Jennifer Love Hewitt cooed about her pretty hot pink twat while visiting a talk show.
Read the full post here.
DAVID GEFFEN'S WORTH about $4 billion, dates pretty college boys, buys $100 million paintings and tries semi-unsuccessfully to keep the world away from his Malibu beachfront property.
Over on the other coast, Carly Simon, who doesn't consider herself "not gay," has been living below the radar on Martha's Vineyard (who is this Martha anyway?).
Back before digitally-recorded history, when Divad was Carly's producer at Elektra Records, she recorded a song called You're So Vain which made her rich enough to buy the Eastern Seaboard. But it also generated a mystery.
The question: "Who is so vain?" has lasted for 38 years.
Read the full post here.
JUST DAYS AFTER SCIENTISTS WHO REFUSE TO STUDY DOLPHINS IN CAPTIVITY argued that those marine animals should be deemed "nonhuman persons," a six-ton Orca confined in tanks at Florida's SeaWorld killed a human for the third time.
It was just last Sunday at the annual American Association for the Advancement of Science conference that scientists debated whether dolphins deserve special rights because of their human-like qualities.
"Dolphins appear to be self-conscious, unique individuals with distinctive personalities, memories and a sense of self, who are vulnerable to a wide range of physical and emotional pain and harm, and who have the power to reflect upon and choose their actions," Thomas I. White of the Oxford Centre for Animal Ethics reportedly told the crowd.
The proof? Researchers have found in studies that dolphins whose bodies were "marked" quickly swam to observe their reflections in a mirror. Because these experiences verified self-awareness, these same scientists have vowed not to study dolphins in captivity because they believe it's cruel.
Read the full post here.
AWWWW, AREN'T THEY PRECIOUS?
And there is not a hint of snark in that comment.
Nicole Richie released a pic of her 5-month-old son son on her website today giving him a smooch while standing before the Eiffel Tower.
"In the City of Lights with my true love," Nicole tweeted today.
The adopted daughter of Lionel and Brenda Ritchie has turned into quite a beautiful lady who seems like her head's screwed on pretty straight. At least, by Hollywood standards. She's proof it's possible to grow up privileged and grounded. Or what maybe that's what babies will do for you.
Thanks for sharing this beautiful pic, Nicole.
YOUR LADY GAGA ALARM GOES OFF AT 6:05 A.M. sharp.
You hop out of bed, make a piping hot cup of coffee, fire up the laptop and begin reading the news. An article on the rise of The Oath Keepers catches your attention. They are a loosely-knit national group armed to the teeth -- often with advanced military and police training -- who have dedicated themselves to protecting their freedoms and the consititution itself. "They sound nutty and dangerous," you mutter to yourself.
Sip.
But you begin to wonder: "With all this business about Homeland Security and the suspension of individual rights in America, maybe they have a point?"
Read the full post here.
THERE'S AT LEAST ONE VAGINA THAT HE ISN'T ALLERGIC TO.
Reluctant vampire/boy toy Robert Pattinson told the U.K's The Sun Sunday night:
"It is extremely difficult but we are together, yes. We can't arrive at the same time because of the fans. It goes crazy.
Pattinson and Stewart both attended the British Academy of Film and Television Arts (BAFTAs). Stewart won the Orange Rising Star award, while the Brit Pattinson was a presenter.
"This was supposed to be a public appearance as a couple but it's impossible,"' Pattinson reportedly said. "We are here together and it's a public event but it's not easy. We have to do all this stuff to avoid attention."
The two arrived separately and sat at different tables.
The hotties have long been rumored to be dating one another but have deliberately kept out of the public eye due to zealous Twilight fans.
Now that the truth's out, can vampire love last after exposure to the sunlight?
THIS PIC PURPORTS TO SHOW CONAN O'BRIEN KISSING A NONHUMAN DOLPHIN WHILE ON VACATION.
We're not buying it, unless Conan's deal with the devil to look perpetually young was called off when he left NBC's employ.
We think this must be Conan's batty older uncle, you know, the one they keep in the attic. 'Cause unemployed talk show hosts in search of a gig don't let themselves go like this in the space of a month.
IF PERCEPTION IS EVERYTHING, MAYBE THAT EXPLAINS WHY ON FRIDAY TIGER WOODS appeared fatter, older, balder and much more human.
And contrite, too! Don't forget contrite.
For that was the point of Woods' worldwide apology for detonating his career and family with "sexual napalm,'' to borrow a phrase from John Mayer.
In a carefully crafted apologia delivered in 13:32 minutes, the fallen golf god seemed hellbent on piecing together the shattered shards of his once-mythic life.
But here was something different: he didn't point the finger at anyone else. He didn't blame it on his father's alleged womanizing; he didn't blame it on the enabling behavior of his handlers or the sycophants who surround him. (Though that was evident with just a quick through the audience.
Read "Tiger Woods Fall Prey To The Chase For Magic Pussy here.
Read the full post here.
THEY WERE THE KING AND QUEEN OF THE ICE RINK.
The King: talk, dark and handsome Evan Lysacek, originally from Illinois, who performed his long program with a steely and disciplined determination to dominate.
The Queen: the glittery, fluid and feminine Johnny Weir, skating the "the best he's ever been -- ever,'' according to NBC's Olympics skating commentator Scott Hamilton.
And even though he mesmerized, skated his winningest, it suspiciously wasn't enough for the Pennsylvania native to take home a medal.
The long program at the 2010 Vancouver Olympics upended Russia's 18-year reign over the men's figure skating contest.
Read the full post here.
LOOK! IT'S A BIRD, IT'S A PLANE, IT'S THE SUPER G!
Gaga soars over the crowd at the Brit Awards where she snagged awards for International Female Solo Artist and International Album (for The Fame) and International Breakthrough Act.
Did anyone else or thing matter at the show? Who can tell when The Lady G envelopes attention with her white wings and birdnest's wig.
Just looking at these pictures is so exhausting that I haven't time or energy to read about anybody else.
Read the full post here.
I'M READING THE MUCH BALLYHOOED PLAYBOY INTERVIEW WITH SELF-PROFESSED "douche-bag" John Mayer when I have an "a ha moment". And no I'm not goosing myself while reading how John jerks off as the filmtracks of his past loves play over and over in his mind.
I'm talking about an eureka instant when insight strikes: this charm John Mayer is the male version of loose lips Megan Fox.
Aren't these faux sophisticates just opposite sides of the same coin? Hot conquests who hated school, suffer from Tourette's and insipidly blather on about whatever wisp of a thought that flits through their minds.
John, for instance, happily prattles on about seeing 300 cunts before even hopping out of bed, while Megan brags how she's a total slob, pinches loafs and doesn't flush.
Read the full post here.
THE CLOSEST THE PUBLIC WILL EVER GET TO THE TRUTH about Michael Jackson's mental and physical state will come during the criminal trial of Dr. Conrad Murray on manslaughter charges.
For this reason, I'm looking forward to the testimony of Murray, Jackson family members, nanny Grace Rharamba, and any and all other players in the Michael Jackson death drama.
Media are already lining up outside the Los Angeles county courthouse awaiting Murray's "perp walk" as he is expected to arrive in court today to be formally charged with involuntary manslaughter.
Undercover police reportedly will be in the crowd to protect Murray from any crazed Jackson fan who might try to attack Murray.
Read the full post here.
TO THE TWISTED AND CONTROLLING MIND OF STEPHEN GARCIA, it wasn't enough to kill himself and his nine-month-old son to spite an ex-girlfriend. He had to have the last word.
In his final vengeful and selfish act, Garcia, 25, shot his son Wyatt to death before turning the gun on himself in a parked vehicle on a rural road in Twin Peaks, Calif.
The murder-suicide was the final act of a tragedy that had played for weeks on the social medium Facebook, the Internet, and in Joshua Tree, Calif. courts.
Garcia was enraged and bitter that his ex-girlfriend, whom I will not mention out of spite to him, had become involved with another man.
So in exhaustive, obsessive detail, he had for weeks begged, pleaded and threatened his ex-girlfriend through Facebook, text messages and his personal website.
"HOW DO YOU THINK THIS IS GOING TO AFFECT ME FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE?," Garcia wrote. "HOW IS IT GOING TO AFFECT WYATT? DO YOU HONESTLY BELIEVE IM (sic) GOING TO JUST SIT BACK AND WATCH WYATT BE RAISED BY ANOTHER MAN? HOW LONG BEFORE I DO SOMETHING STUPID?"
A final video and obituary was posted on Garcia's Facebook page within hours of Garcia's death but it remains unclear if it was posted before or after the crime. In it, he makes the ridiculous claim that he killed his son to protect him. He also characterized the deaths as "punishment" to his exgirlfriend.
Read the full post here.
OOOH LOOKIE! REALITY TV STAR AND SKATING CHAMP JOHNNY WEIRD is one of Lady Gaga's little monsters.
Actually, it's Weir, but you just know he's spent his whole life with that 'd' appendage. Maybe that's why he identifies with the Lady G, who is rumored to have an extra accessory of her own. The Olympic skater even sat next to Stefani's mom at a recent concert in New York City.
Chalk up another gay for GaGa, despite what Johnny will or won't say.
But he doesn't have to say much when Be Good Johnny Weir, airing Mondays at 10:30pm (Eastern) on Sundance, shows the skating queen bubble-bathing and lolling in bed with his ''best friend" Paris.
Read the full post here.
A BRITISH ONLINE GAME MAKES AN UGLY JOKE OUT OF THIRD-WORLD ADOPTEES becoming de rigueur accessories for "wannabe style mavens."
At the virtual playground My-Minx.com, players can adopt children fashioned after the children of Madonna, Angelina Jolie and actor Ewan McGregor.
Players can choose from Maddox, 3, who eats cockroaches, Pax, 5, who loves Vietnamese noodles, Zahara, 4, who enjoys "guinea pig."
Another ''adoptee,'' named after McGregor's daughter Jamiyan, enjoys eating rats.
Once purchased, players can dress their orphans in designer duds and try selling their pictures to celebrity magazines.
Read the full post here.
THE LONG NIGHTMARE IS OVER FOR MISS LONELYHEARTS: The she-wolf that stole her husband is getting her comeuppance.
The world trembles that the singular Brangelina is once again merely "Brad" and "Angie," as speculation boils that the beauteous twosome is kaput.
And in an instant the the question becomes : Will Jennifer Aniston and Brad get back together?
It's too soon to predict, and our money is on 'no.' But what a satisfying twist to a torrid love story that began when Pitt and Jolie hooked up while starring opposite each other in the movie Mr. and Mrs. Smith.
“And in an instant the question becomes: Will Jennifer Aniston and Brad get back together?
”
Shortly after the film role, Pitt divorced Jennifer, dubbed "America's sweetheart," and took up with the hypnotically dangerous Angelina, the girl who purportedly French-kissed her brother and wore vials of blood around her neck.
Read the full post here.
"I AM QUINN'S FATHER," Former presidential candidate John Edwards said today in what is surely one of the most anticlimactic public pronouncements ever made.
Finally, after three years of lying, cheating, denying, conspiring, obfuscating and hiding in hotel bathrooms, Edwards admitted to fathering an illegitimate child who is the spitting image of himself. As if we all didn't know already.
In a written statement to NBC about the daughter he fathered with videographer Rielle Hunter, Edwards said, "I will do everything in my power to provide her with the love and support she deserves…It was wrong for me to ever deny she was my daughter."
The Associated Press reported that Edwards' wife, Elizabeth, who tirelessly avoided the truth about the girl's paternity for two years, said of the revelation: "Our whole family feels relieved."
Last May, Mrs. Edwards told Oprah that she had "no idea" if Frances Quinn Hunter, now 2, was her husband's child. "It doesn't look like my children, but I don't have any idea,'' she said.
The recently published book Game Change quotes Mrs. Edwards as saying of her husband's denial: "I have to believe it. Because if I don't, it means I'm married to a monster."
Read the full post here.
IT WAS EASY TO SEE WHY ROBERT DOWNEY JR. ONCE HAD A SUBSTANCE PROBLEM AT Sunday's Golden Globes: Hollywood's most likeable habituae was a mass of jangly, manic energy while giving his acceptance speech for best actor in Sherlock Holmes.
"If you start playing violins, I will tear this joint apart," were the first words out of Downey's mouth, and we were afraid he might be serious.
Read the full post here.
MO'NIQUE STOLE THE SPOTLIGHT AT THE 67TH GOLDEN GLOBES after winning for her turn as an abusive mother in the movie Precious that actress Helen Mirren called "raw poetry."
Mo'Nique, 42, swept onto the Beverly Hilton stage with Oprahesque confidence in a gold sleeveless gown.
"First, let me say thank you God for this amazing ride that you're allowing me to go on. And everybody kept asking me did I know my speech. And I said no I don't know what I'mma say because I don't want people to think that I just know that I done won something. So, no, I don't know."
But her delivery was better than this sounds!
"But I'm shaking and when I tell ya'll I am in the mist of my dream. And when I look into the eyes of the man that I stood next to at 14 years old. And I said to him one day we are going to be stars and he said, 'You first.' And we walked this red carpet together tonight. Sidney I love you more than you will ever know baby.
Read the full post here.
FUNNYMAN Ricky Gervais starred in a role of his own making last night: Edward Scizzorsmouth.
In a room full of celebrities buffed to a glow, the British actor was all angles and sharp blades.
"Why oh why was The Invention of Lying not nominated? I don't know, I just don't know. Maybe the DVD will win an award," he said pulling it out from below the podium. "That's out Tuesday at Wal-mart. So go and buy that."
In addition to clumsily self-promoting his movie and television show, Gervais' broke a cardinal sin of comedy: he didn't play to the audience.
"I've had a little work done," he said after joking about the plastic surgery of the stars. "I've had cheek implants …and I've had a penis reduction. Just got the one now. And it is very tiny. But so are my hands so when I holding it it looks pretty big.
Read the full post here.
THE 67TH ANNUAL GOLDEN GLOBES DIDN'T LOOK A DAY OVER 30 as Hollywood's preternaturally preserved elite gathered Sunday to celebrate themselves.
"Looking at the all the faces here reminds me of some of the great work that has been done this year…by cosmetic surgeons," quipped the night's host, cheeky court jester Ricky Gervais. "You all look great."
"It is an honor to be here in a room full of what I consider to be the most important people on the planet: Actors," he added. "They're just better than ordinary people, aren't they?"
The audience, a veritable Who's Who of Hollywood, glimmered in agreement.
Read the full post here.
DID LADY GAGA CANCEL HER THURSDAY NIGHT INDIANA CONCERT TO PREP FOR HER FRIDAY MORNING PERFORMANCE AT OPRAH'S SHOP?
The Lafayette Journal & Courier reported last night that Lady Gaga cancelled her concert at Purdue University's Elliot Hall Of Music.
The paper reported that "before the announcement, at least two EMTs were confirmed to be backstage by Elliott Hall staff. One unconfirmed rumor was that the performer had passed out."
But officials at three hospitals in Lafayette, Ind., said that neither Lady Gaga nor a Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta were treated at their facilities. And an employee at one hospital said, "The rumor was false. When we contacted police, they said she left Lafayette in a private vehicle."
Gags is skedded to visit Oprah's Chicago studio -- figuratively up the road about 108 miles --for a 9am taping.
Read the full post here.
AS IF J SCHOOLS AREN'T BLEAK ENOUGH THESE DAYS, WITH U.S. NEWSPAPERS VIRTUALLY IN A "FREE FALL," now comes a case that would give any student reporter pause.
Cook County prosecutors have subpoenaed the grade book and emails of a Northwestern University professor who has helped free 11 innocent men from Illinois' death row since 1996.
Prosecutors are seeking David Protess' files to determine if students' were pressured to find exculpatory evidence for good grades while investigating the conviction of Anthony McKinney for a 1978 murder.
Read the full post here.
THE "POWERFUL ESSENCE" OF ART CLOKEY'S FORMULA FOR FUN WAS GUMBY, a stretchy green good thing that entertained kids and adults alike for four decades.
Animator Clokey died in his sleep at his home Friday in Los Osos, Calif., his son Joseph told the Los Angeles Times. He had suffered repeated bladder infections.
Clokey's creation Gumby debuted on The Howdy Doody Show and later starred in its own claymation program along with sidekick, Pokey.
Gumby battled blockheads, visited the moon, got lost in Chinatown and encountered rain spirits on unpredictable adventures.
The Times' obituary says Clokey was born Arthur Farrington in Detroit, Michigan. His father died when he was 8 and his mother abandoned him after she remarried. He was adopted by famous music teacher Joseph W. Clokey who took him on trips throughout North America."That's why 'The Adventures of Gumby' were so adventurous," his son Joseph told the Times.
He also said there was a reason the character was green: "Gumby was green because my dad cared about the environment."
WITHIN THE NEXT SIX MONTHS, marriage in France is set to become a much more docile affair. The French government is attempting with a new law to decrease the harmful psychological effects of yelling within marriage.
The law will cover any type of rude behavior toward one's spouse including "repeated rude remarks about a partner's appearance, false allegations of infidelity and threats of physical violence." A warning would be given for a person's first documented decibels, with jail being the final repercussion.
There are many critics of the new law both here and in France. While well-intentioned, I find it to be both humorously offensive and ineffective. Who is to say when a conversation stops being a discussion and becomes an assault? Everyone within a marriage interprets things in their own way. If my husband tells me to "Shut Up!," and I then call him a dork, are we arguing or being playful?
Read the full post here.
VITRIOL SPEWING OVER Savicki vs. Baystate Medical Center illuminates workingclass rage and women's angst over reproductive rights, but will have little impact on the case should it make it to trial.
Tessa Savicki, 35, the mother of nine children who collects welfare and disability benefits, has sued a Massachusettes hospital claiming its staff illegally sterilized her.
In a lawsuit filed last November, Savicki claims doctors gave her a tubal ligation following the birth of her son rather than implant an intrauterine device. State law requires consent forms to be filed 30 days in advance of sterilization, but officials of Baystate Medical Center admit they cannot locate a form signed by Savicki.
"There was no medical reason for them to do this," Savicki told the Boston Herald. "That's my choice. This is my body.
Read the full post here.
BUZZ BISSINGER SIFTS THROUGH THE DETRITUS OF TIGER WOODS' career in an upcoming Vanity Fair issue that photographically depicts the golfer looking more like thief than legend.
VF's February cover shows Tiger bare-chested, wearing somber expression and dark stocking cap. The profile delivers more or less the same: A publicly undressed Tiger, no longer caped superhero, but an imperfect man who calculatingly obscured his darker impulses.
Bissinger stitches together by now the well-worn "alleged" anecdotes about Tiger's accidental unmasking -- the wrathful wife slicing him with a golf club; the fire hydrant; the Ambien-fueled sex capades; the spankings and hair pulling; the payoffs. He then wraps it all up into a tidy conclusion to satisfy the public:
"In the end it was the age-old clash of image versus reality, the compartmentalization of two different lives that inevitably merge at some certain point, whoever you are."
Well, at the very least we hope so, the idea of getting so snookered an insult to our collective intelligence.
Bissinger writes that: "Woods, to the bitter end and with a kind of hubris that revealed his fundamental arrogance, still felt he could beat the tidal wave back. When he was taken to the hospital for injuries, a fake name was used."
Read the full post here.
YIPPEE! EVERYBODY'S BLOWING HORNS OR TOOTIN' LINES TO THE NEW YEAR! Figuratively speaking, of course. Don't be tardy for the party!
At the stroke of midnight, we'll pat ourselves on the back for being older and wiser, Tiger Woods and Michael Jackson excepted. And what a year 2009 was!
We had the Gosselins and the Glambert, the Speidi and the Tiger serving up the shock and awful.
Then Farrah and Michael, and Patrick Swayze and Billy Mays all took their exits, God rest their souls.
But surely 2010 has bigger and better things in store. That's the promise of the New Year! And so we turn to CrabbyGolightly's third annual "WTF Celebrity Predictions." Ready? Here goes:
Golf's untameable Tiger comes out of hiding, visits the Church of Oprah and confesses his temporal love for Rachel Uchitel, who with her aging uterus wastes no time producing a Cablinjewasian.
Read the full post here.
WITH RUMOR THE INTERNET'S PREFERRED CURRENCY, IT HARDLY SEEMS TO MATTER WHAT'S TRUE OR NOT ABOUT TIGER AND HIS NO. 1 GAL PAL, Rachel Uchitel.
Tiger may or may not be sailing in the Bahamas with buddies. Or holding hands with Rachel in West Palm, Fla. Or seeking plastic surgery in Arizona to fix those gashes to his face from a golf club. Or possibly in deep, intensive marital therapy.
Or maybe it's all a bunch of horse shit. And/or he wants out, wants to be with his love, the woman he "connects" with.
Until the divorce papers are filed, and the pictures are snapped, we won't know if the future holds the "Mrs. Woods" title for Uchitel.
BUT. THERE. IS. ANOTHER. WAY! We can see what the stars ordain!
Don't laugh! Oh, wait a minute, this is info-tainment! Have yourself a guffaw! And check out what the instantaneous compatibility reading at CafeAstrology has to say about a Tiger/Rachel matchup.
SUN CONJUNCT MARS
Pure sexual attraction will unite the couple. They will have an ideal partner. They will be energetic, full of life and can undertake things together on the professional level or travel together on adventurous, unpredictable journeys. They respect each other's goals and drives, and don't stand in the way of their attempts to achieve their goals. Their body rhythms match well, and they share a basic physical bond that is hard to break.
MERCURY SQUARE VENUS
Their relationship will sometimes be agreeable, sometimes disturbed. They will like to share their ideas which are not always to the other's taste, so that they may have interminable discussions in order to convince each other of their mistakes, lack of judgement or lack of taste. (Hmmm. Reminds me of Tiger's alleged text messages to her!)
SUN SQUARE PLUTO
A great physical attraction will unite the couple, but this relationship is unlikely to be entirely healthy.
Read the full post here.
CHARLIE SHEEN'S GOT A RAP SHEET LONG ENOUGH FOR Two and a Half Men.
The Golden Globe winner faces a new round of charges alleging domestic violence after his third wife alleged he held her down and threatened her with a knife, news reports say. Radaronline.com claims the fight broke out after Brooke Mueller told her husband she wanted a divorce.
Mueller claims TV's highest paid actor held her down on a bed and said, "You better be in fear. If you tell anybody, I'll kill you," according to Aspen police.
Read the full post here.
THE PHOTO'S ALREADY BEEN REVEALED A FRAUD. BUT THE SNAP ALLEGED TO SHOW JOHN F. KENNEDY JR. carousing aboard a ship with naked women offers reprieve to Tiger Woods, and offers further proof that powerful men share a common pursuit.
You can come out of hiding, Tiger! The coast is clear! Elin's in Sweden and you're no longer danger of swinging golf clubs!
TMZ's false report (and the subsequent false reporting here and all over the web) reminds us that Tiger's womanizing is nothing new in the annals of powerful men.
Read the full post here.
WE IMAGINE THAT SHE'S GENERALLY INSUFFERABLE, BUT our hearts go out to Ivana Trump this morning.
Firstly, for having the misfortune of aging so painfully and obviously on camera. (God damn that haughty Melania with her ridiculous faux-royal website.)
But we also feel bad for the rich hotelier for having the bad luck of being tossed off a Delta flight enroute to New York from Palm Springs after becoming enraged when unruly children ran through first class. After all, we're guessing she dropped at least $1,000 for that ticket and hasn't been around shrieking tiny tots in awhile.
While the regurgitated stories around the web make Ivana sound like a sourpuss, if you dig deeper you'll find a groundswell of sympathy for her on the comment boards. Here's a sampling:
Read the full post here.
AMERICANS ARE ADDICTED TO CELEBRITIES. We love them. But what we love even more than celebrities is tearing them down and destroying them and watching them squirm under the harsh light of fame.
We lap that stuff up and when we are done gnawing on their bones, we move on to the next victim. This decade has seen its fair share of melt-downs, racist rants, obscene whoring and just plain incompetence.
Lives have been ruined, careers have been lost, and in some cases, people have actually died. And it is with that in mind that we here at Heavy bring you the top 10 celebrity falls from grace of the decade.
10. Chris Brown -- How do you derail a promising music career that has people calling you the next Michael Jackson? Easy. You beat down your hot, famous girlfriend and then spend the ensuing weeks and months giving half-assed apologies that no one buys. Seriously, come on dude. Even OJ probably thinks you went a little too far. I mean, it's bad enough to slap a girl around but there were reports that Brown actually bit Rihanna. How out of your own head do you have to be for that to happen? At this point, I'm surprised they don't wheel Brown out in a straight jacket wearing one of those Hannibal Lecter masks every time he needs to make a public appearance.
9. Amy Winehouse -- Believe it or not, there was a brief window where Amy Winehouse was actually a respected musician and not a cracked out shell of a human being. As meltdowns go, hers was quick and spectacular. A taste of success is enough to drive even the most stable people mad, and when you combine that with the taste of the crack pipe, you're pretty much guaranteed to find yourself on the cover of every magazine looking like a junky, zombified version of Marilyn Manson.
8. Phil Spector -- Sure, everyone knew for years that Spector, the revolutionary pop music producer, was a bit of an eccentric. But being an eccentric is one thing. People can overlook that, especially when you are hailed as a genius. But people tend to frown on it when you straight up kill someone. Indeed. It's a little hard to come back from that sort of thing. One day you're known for the Wall of Sound, the next day you're known for the sound of some poor lady's brains hitting the wall.
7. Tom Cruise-- Apparently, at some point this decade, Cruise became tired of being a mere celebrity and decided to try his hand at being insane. Everyone remembers Cruise couch surfing and scaring the holy hell out of Oprah, and then accosting Matt Lauer for not understanding the evils of psychiatry. It was a hell of a coming out party, and though things have quieted down a bit for Cruise in the last couple of years, the damage has already been done. I can just about guarantee you that the next time you are in a movie theater and a trailer for a film starring Cruise comes on that half the audience will laugh.
6. Mel Gibson -- Once upon a time, Mel Gibson was one of the biggest movie stars in the world. And then he decided to make a little movie about the last days of Jesus, and, well, things kind of changed for Mad Max. Of course, it didn't help that Gibson found himself battling accusations that his film blamed the Jews for Jesus' death. That will tend to put a damper on things. So will getting busted for a DUI, calling a female cop Sugartits and then divorcing your wife and knocking up your new Russian girlfriend.
Read the Top 10 Internet Memes Of The Decade.
Read the Top 10 Game-Changing Hip Hop Events Of The Decade.
Read the full post here.
MY PERSONAL MOTTO IS ''Everything Goes Better With Glitter." Weird but true.
I have seen how tiny shards of color sprinkled over the grimmest day can making everything all sparkly and beautiful.
So perhaps I was among the few not surprised to read that tinsel sales are way up this year, according to the Wall Street Journal.
The story is filled with nonessential facts like tinsel "works on all 35 different species of Christmas trees." And a Philadelphia manufacturer was once known as the "The King of Tinsel." And the word tinsel derives from the French word estincele, meaning sparkle. Fun empty facts.
As a former journalist, I should probably look askanced at the Journal spending precious reporting hours on such filler. But, hey, it's a new day. No one cares anymore about making things better! No one has any hope for change! Let's just throw a party! I'll provide the tinsel!
It's practically a metaphor for America: cheap, shiny and sticks to everything.
IT IS PERFECTION. A movie for the ages. Truly.
What other movie plays 24 hours a day every year? What other movie ever has? What other movie ever could?
A Christmas Story is simple and pure and takes us back to childhood -- not our childhood -- but somebody else's. A childhood better than our own; of home and warmth and dreams fulfilled.
Of Ralphie.
Then here come Mephistopheles to ruin it all.
Former reality TV star Billy Jeffrey won the right to sleep in Ralphie's house.
Who? OK, "star" may be a stretch. He was on ABC's True Beauty a year ago. Nobody watched and he didn't win. If you eat something disagreeable over the holidays and need to puke it up, Billy has a MySpace page. There, he brags about his current career path -- touring Germany as a Chippendales dancer.
Read the full post here.
FOR THE FIRST TIME IN 35 YEARS, JAMES BAIN AWOKE this morning a free man.
The 54-year-old Florida man lived two-thirds of his life in prison after being wrongly convicted of kidnapping and raping a 9-year-old boy in 1974.
"I guess I kinda have to feel like when they first landed on the moon," he told reporters.
He also said, "I cannot feel angry. "I put all that in God's hands."
Bain had maintain his innocence all along and had filed six appeals seeking court review. Finally, with the help of the Florida Innocence Project, Bain persuaded a judge to have the evidence reviewed with DNA testing.
Read the full post here.
IF, WHEN YOU SAY YOU WANT A WHITE CHRISTMAS YOU MEAN SNOW, I'LL TAKE IT.
But Christmas trees adorned with white lights? Mantels with white candles? Blah humbug!
In my house, Christmas kitsch is a requirement. There's no more fun way to deck the halls than with whimsical (cheesy?) vintage decorations.
Here's some vintage or vintage-inspired finds from around the web.
Read the full post here.
GRANDMA SAYS IT'S A FAMILY MATTER, AND COURTNEY'S LAWYER SAYS EVERYTHING'S A-OK.
It's just that the "headstrong" 17-year-old wants to live with grandmom. Mosey along, nothing to see here.
It's a burden when the kid has to parent the parent, and from a distance it seems that Frances has been carrying that load for some time.
In Courtney's defense, it must be hell going through life accused of murdering your dead cult hero rocker husband without ever getting your day in court. At least, to defend yourself on that accusation.
May Grandmom offer Frances oasis from the daily storms.
ETERNAL FUCK-UP COURTNEY HATER LOST CUSTODY OF HER DAUGHTER FRANCES BEAN in court today.
Courtney's attorney told reporters that Frances has choosen to live with her deceased rocker dad's mom.
"Courtney's been clean for years and is perfectly fine," Keith A. Fink told People. "This is simply about Frances preferring to live with her grandmother at this time."
Now Kurt Cobain's only daughter, on the cusp of emancipation at 17, will be cared for temporarily by her fraternal grandmother Wendy O'Connor. In an interview last year with Harper's Bazaar said of her grandmother, "She's probably the person I respect most out of anybody in the world."
Read the full post here.
WHOA, WHOA, WHOA ORRIN G. HATCH, MORMON SENATOR FROM UTAH.
Imma happy for you and Imma letchu' finish writing your new Hanukkah song but I just want you to know: Driedel Driedel Driedel is the BEST Hanukkah song of all time. OF ALL TIME! (Shrug).
Seriously though, Mr. Hatch, I get it. You really like Jews and you feel bad that we really don't have that many holiday songs. But, seriously, we're good.
We've got the Driedel song, we have that Adam Sandler ditty and all its remakes, and even Bare Naked Ladies did a couple of songs for us. Really, that's all we need, I don't care who says otherwise.
I mean, come on man, I don't mean to stereotype my people, but seriously, we're Jews. If we really wanted more songs for this holiday we could easily bust out 3 or 4 in a couple of days.
Here's the dirty little secret about Hanukkah that those left-wing, Hanukkah activists and right-wing Hanukkah conservatives don't want you to know about; Hanukkah isn't even the Jewish gift giving holiday.
Read the full post here.
AMERICANS' DEBATE ON SAME-SEX MARRIAGE REACHED an all-time high during the 2004 election.
The religious right cited "the sanctity" of marriage as their main objection, but in an age when vows are exchanged on reality TV shows, what exactly are they talking about?
New Yorkers Rachel Murch and Matthew D'Olimpio are forcing the courts to answer that question. The married couple is seeking an annulment claiming their union violates "constitutional equality guarantees and is thus void" in New York.
We all have heard the claims that other couples -- including Brangelina -- have refused to marry until gays are allowed. But Murch and D'Olimpio have turned their protest into an act of civil disobedience.
Read the full post here.
SO TIGER'S A DOG. STOP THE PRESSES.
He's a man, right? And a wealthy one.
Here's the voicemail message one of Tiger's "transgressions" alleges he left on her voicemail:
"Hey, it's, uh, it's Tiger. I need you to do me a huge favor. Um, can you please, uh, take your name off your phone? My wife went through my phone. And, uh, may be calling you. If you can, please take your name off that and, um, and what do you call it, just have it as a number on the voice mail, just have it as your telephone number. That's it, OK. You gotta do this for me. Huge. Quickly. All right. Bye.''
Sloppy. Very sloppy.
The biggest shock here isn't that Tiger is a slut. A man has needs. But that he hasn't learned a thing from Michael Jordan. Or from Kobe Bryant.
When a wealthy athlete steps out, he's got to pay the "sex tax."
Read the full post here.
AND SO ANOTHER MASTER OF THE UNIVERSE IS FELLED BY THE MYSTERIOUS PULL OF MAGIC PUSSY, that mythic organ promising power, ecstasy and the first place in line among men.
If Tiger thinks his Thanksgiving was bad, we predict his Christmas will be tense and expensive as media report the golf god has had several steamy extramarital affairs.
Let's recite rat-a-tat-tat the famous men waylaid by putting peckers in that most tantalizing "other" hole. Bill Clinton, John Edwards, Eliot Spitzer, Hugh Grant, Jimmy Swaggart, Rudy Giuliani, Prince Charles, John F. Kennedy, David Letterman and on and on and on.
Billions of words have been written speculating what causes famous men to cheat.
And the answer?
Read the full post here.
MICHAELE AND TAREQ SALAHI CANCELLED THEIR INTERVIEW WITH LARRY KING LIVE, apparently holding out for money like the sucking vultures that they are.
Aren't they the living example of the real Real Housewives of Any County U.S.A.? The fact that most of them are poseurs? Just some nouveau riche who use profanity in public, flaunt their many shoes and handbags and never neglect to tell you how much their yacht cost?
We were promised the lives of socialites when the series was first buzzed about. Real ladies who lunch exposing their inner lives. That faded fast as we saw that all we were exposed to were price tags and boob jobs of people we’d never heard of.
The Salahis have taken the famewhore game to a whole 'nother level though. Their situation is both scary (how do you get that close to the president uninvited) and awesome (they got to meet the president!).
Read the full post here.
THE SAUCY WENCH IS SHOWING THEM, THE DOUBTERS WHO LAUGHED AND SCOFFED as she sashayed across Britain's Got Talent stage.
Susan Boyle dared to dream the dream and …whatyda know? It came true.
Her debut album has entered the UK charts at number one, becoming the fastest selling album of the year. By selling 500,000 copies, the release becomes the biggest debut album in the country's chart history.
The milestone comes a mere seven months after the Scottish spinster became an overnight sensation after singing Les Miserables' I've Dreamed A Dream on the British talent show. Her performance brought tears to the eyes of even the most jaded observers as she sung with a spirit and romance that belied her dowdy image.
Read the full post here.
ADAM LAMBERT FOUND A DARING WAY TO UP THE ANTE at the 2009 American Music Awards. Crotch shots and the men who love them aren't high on the list of concerns of the FCC, despite Lambert's simulated blow job being censored from the West Coast broadcast.
Amid the controversy, people forget this show's supposed to be about the music. And Adam Lambert fails as a musician. From a technical standpoint, the instruments frequently drown out his voice. And when they don't, I find myself wishing they would.
But "Glambert" captivates because he's a spectacle, which gratefully distracts from his screechy vocals. And now he's proven his worth as entertainer -- and political provocateur.
Read the full post here.
JAY-Z SWAGGERED AND SHAKIRA SIZZLED, WHITNEY SURVIVED AND KELLY CLARKSON POURED THE SOUL.
The 37th Annual American Music Awards showcased the nation's melting pot of music Sunday night, and proved that being black is the new black with the sexiest, most foot-stompin' music delivered by the brothers and sisters.
The night's best performances belonged to Jay-Z as he delivered his anthem to New York's streets (sorry, critics, I'm not tired of it) and Shakira smoked and stirred during Give It Up To Me. And Kelly Clarkson proved yet again that she's the biggest talent to emerge from American Idol.
Timbaland, Nelly Furtano and new artist SoShy also got the audience stompin' with Morning After Dark.
Whitney Houston delivered an uneven but affecting rendition of Strength that got a standing ovation from a sympathetic audience. That woman has put herself through hell and she's got the wounds to prove it.
Rihanna's disturbia stage act was riveting even if her vocals weren't as fierce on Wait Your Turn and Hard.
Mary J. Blige and The Black Eyed Peas took their turns heating up the party.
The night's biggest disappointments were Lady GaGa and Adam Lambert.
Gaga's platinum cyborg act proved oddly unaffecting, while the campy Lambert delivered his pre-Idol pseudo shocking act.
Read the full post here.
HER DOCTOR'S PRESCRIPTION: Have Fun.
So Nathalie Blanchard of Quebec took in a little Chippendales action, attended a birthday party, took a "sun" holiday. Then she did something stupid: she posted her pics in the throes of amusement on Facebook.
But Blanchard was on leave for depression from her job at IBM.
And, unbeknowst to her, depressed people can never, ever smile or have fun. They must stay grim inside their homes at all times of the day and night, never to show a crack of a grin in public.
And even if they do seek respite from gloom, they should definitely not be dumb enough to post their pictures on Facebook, where the world can pull up the pics and judge you.
And apparently Blanchard was in fact dumb, did post such pics, which were seen by her Manulife insurance agent, who declared that she looked to be having too good a time to be depressed. So Blanchard's sick benefits were cut, though the company does say they weighed other factors in its decision.
Now Blanchard's lawyer is investigating his options. And Blanchard wonders how Manulife saw the pics which she alleges were only supposed to be seen by her "approved" friends.
The story's moral?
Facebook is not your friend. Your insurance agent is not your friend.
Don't show fake friends your pictures.
DOESN'T GET ANY BETTER.
A boy so smitten he declares his love for you to the world in a video proposal.
And what two people wouldn't fall hard after venturing from Florida to San Francisco and then to New York together? These two share a sense of adventure.
Also, love and joy and fun -- and a dream.
"You are a joy," Justin Johnson tells his girlfriend of six years, Marissa Nystrom in a video he posted on Tumblr's dashboard.
"You are the one I love more than anything. I can't wait to see you every night. I love to wake up to you every morning. I want to wake up smiling next to you for the rest of our lives.
"Marissa, will you marry me?"
Doesn't get any better.
TONGUES WERE HANGING OUT ALL OVER THE WEB AS PLAYGIRL TEASED A PEEK AT LEVI JOHNSTON IN THE RAW.
As Sarah Palin began her publicity tour for Going Rogue, Levi took a page from her book and began his own outsider campaign as "player."
The photo preview of Johnson seemed deliberately timed to upstage Palin's opening salvo of her book tour. But while reviews of Palin talking to Oprah were tepid, Levi was knocking the socks off girls (including me) and gays across the web.
"I'd certainly let him take me behind the middle school and get me pregnant,'' gushed pssshwhatever on Gawker. "Yowza.'
And when SleeplessNights recommended Levi for president, Wrapitup countered, "Er, I wouldn't go that far. But Secretary of Keepin It Hott For Da Ladiez, mos def."
"Positively nibble-worthy,'' cooed Snugbug.
Read the full post here.
AS THE NATION GRAPPLES WITH THE OVERWHELMING TASK OF OVERHAULING A FLAWED HEALTH CARE SYSTEM, there is at least one victory for Americans this week.
After more than a decade spent languishing in Congress, a new law goes into effect Nov. 21st prohibiting employers from using genetic testing in decisions regarding hiring, firing or promotions.
"There's an absolute ban on the use of genetic information to make any kind of decision about employment," Christopher Kuczynski of the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission told the New York Times.
The passing of the Genetic Information Nondiscrimination Act was considered critical to the further development of genetic testing for "personalized medicine." For good reason, many Americans have avoided testing out of fear that results would be used against them by health insurance companies and employers. The new law prohibits employers' and insurance companies from overtly seeking employees' genetic information.
The next frontier in genetics law that legislators and jurists must address is whether organizations and individual researchers can patent genetic sequences from individuals' DNA. It will be years before that issue is resolved, but stay tuned.
THE BIGGEST FAMEWHORES IN HOLLYWOOD have written a book on -- ta da! -- how to be a fame whore! Because what other identifiable skills do Heid Montagi and Spencer Pratt have?
The titillating reality TV twosome are sharing their secrets on fame mongering in How To Be Famous: Our Guide To Looking The Part, Playing The Press and Becoming a Tabloid Picture.
In their latest devious calculation, Speidi teaches how to "increase your capacity for evil," feed the public's appetite for plastic surgery stories and and "outrageous behavior," and share the "secrets of celebrity couple math."
And in the opinion of this immodest couple, no one better personifies the game than the Jolie-Pitts.
"We'd love to sit down and discuss fame with them," Speidi, answering as one, told Playboy.com. "Consider this your formal invitation, Brangelina. Let's hang out sometime. We'll be SpeidiLina!"
Ha! That's hil-ar-i-ous, you kooky kids!
The duo also frets in mock horror about possibly offending Hollywood's reigning prom queen and king.
"We wouldn't want to piss them off. She might steal Spencer -- you know, because she steals people's husbands!" Bada bing. Bada boom.
We can practically hear the hiss of revulsion that Speidi's effrontery provokes in Angelina. "How dare they!," we feel certain she roars. "They're not worthy of our spit!"
Read the full post here.
WHAT IF YOU LIKE YOUR LIFE COMPARTMENTALIZED?
WHat if you don't want to sign in to HuffPo or BuzzFeed with Facebook?
What if you don't want to use your real name on email?
Tough luck to you.
The web masters are working overtime to make sure that users sign in to Facebook or announce to everybody in your Yahoo mailbox what you're doing at that moment.
The pressure's on for everybody to hook up or link in with everybody else, smothering out the smallest vestiges of privacy we have left.
Why? So marketers can collect the crumbs from every cookie embedded on your computer?
The growth in social networking is so explosive -- 700 million people worldwide are using some form of it -- that we forget that it's still a grand experiment.
But, increasingly, the potential consequences are spilling out.
We've all read dozens of stories about people who got fired after posting something stupid on Facebook. The latest example comes just today when news broke that a Georgia schoolteacher was forced to resigned because she was holding a drink in her hand.
Read the full post here.
OH Goody! Yet another chance to gawk and slobber over the playthings of the rich and famous! 
Now there's BillionaireXchange, an online auction site for the world's haves and want-to-sell-to-haves, whose members "are able to buy, sell, bid-on, auction, and or exchange luxury items all around the world.''
"Imagine trading your mansion in Beverly Hills for a Chateau in France, or your antique Rolls Royce for a new model Bentley, or even a bottle of your 1802 Chateau Lafitte for a bottle of 1947 Cheval Blanc,'' the copy coos. "The possibilities are literally endless. So, ask yourself, 'What is the luxury object of your heart’s desire?' "
A bit cheesy, yes, but then catering to the rich means serving up an endless plate of effusive claims of harder, faster, better.
Here the rich can peruse an online catalogue that includes a diamond-encrusted men's dragon pendant, baseball's A-Rod's Coral Gables, Fla. estate, and a bottle of Remy Martin Cognac the Black Pearl Louis XIII 1.7.
Read the full post here.
SCIENTISTS ARE REPORTING NEWS FROM THE LABORATORY THAT GIVES NEW HOPE TO MEN AND BUNNIES SUFFERING FROM ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION.
Researchers at the Institute for Regenerative Medicine at Wake Forest University Baptist Medical Center in North Carolina are reporting that they constructed a fully functioning rabbit penis that enabled bunnies to screw and procreate like, well, rabbits.
The hope is that the new technology will one day help men with erecticle dysfunction to perform sexually.
"Further studies are required, of course, but our results are encouraging and suggest that the technology has considerable potential for patients who need penile reconstruction," the Institute's Director Anthony Atala told LiveScience.
However, scientists stil have no cure for men suffering from emasculation.
THE ONLY GOOD RESULT FROM GETTING SLAPPED AROUND IS WISDOM, AND RIHANNA'S SHOWING PROOF OF HER HARD-EARNED LESSON.
After months of speculation as to what happened February 7, 2009 that left her bruised and battered and Chris Brown with five years' probation, Rihanna gave an in-depth interview with Diane Sawyer that put the kibosh on the mysteries surround that evening and gave an intimate look at the young singer's introspection after the incident.
The drive home from a Grammy-party that evening changed the paths of two young pop stars poised for worldwide success. By Rhianna's account, it all started with a text message found in Brown's phone from an ex-flame.
"I caught him in a lie," Rihanna said.
His lying -- and her refusal to drop the issue -- ignited the situation to the point where Brown eventually shoved Rihanna's head into the window, punched her in the face and bit her ear and ring finger. Her resulting injuries were photographed and released by the tabloid website TMZ.com
This Mike Tyson-esque turn for Brown was allegedly his first, sort of.
When Sawyer asked Rihanna had it happened before, she said no. When Sawyer pointed out that she had said he shoved her repeatedly into a wall before, Rihanna's rationale was, "He only shoved her into the wall once."
Read the full post here.
I DIDN'T KNOW THE PRACTICE OF GOING BLACKFACE WAS STILL UP FOR DEBATE in 2009. So let's review after four recent public displays.
First, French Vogue does a photo spread depicting supermodel Lara Stone in blackface.
Then four performers wear faux afros and paint their skin black in a mock performance of The Jackson 5 on an Australian variety show. Harry Connick, Jr., a judge on the show, verbally smacks the quintet saying they'd be banned if they had pulled that stunt in America.
Then Tyra Bank's America's Next Top Model dons its wannabes in different ethnic get ups.
Now comes the latest poor excuse for humor: Two Northwestern University students pull a Halloween trick by dressing up as African Americans.
For those who are too ignorant to know, performing in blackface was -- and is -- the outward manifestation of systemic racism, originally dating to the 19th century when white performers mocked and degaded blacks and perpetuated stereotypes associated with them.
Read the full post here.
I'M LIVING IN BASEBALL'S EMPIRE. And to Yankee haters I say, "Stuff it!"
I should have bet money as I rightly predicted that the New York Yankees would take home the prize in game 6 of the 2009 World Series.
How I feel for fans in other cities when they hear the New York media pitching phrases like "First World Series since 2003" and "First championship after a 10-year drought."
Take for example, the Phillies. Before last season, the defending champs hadn't seen a World Series since the early 90's -- and hadn't won one since 1980.
And just weep if you're a Cubs fan. Though that team has come close in recent history, Chicago's lovable losers haven't played a World Series since a bomb was dropped onHiroshima.
And the last time they won it all? Just before William Howard Taft became President of the United States.
There's no secret that there's lots Yankee haters out there. No doubt their loathing grew stronger last night as Yankees manager Joe Girardi hoisted the Commisioner's Trophy in the air in front of a packed house at the brand new Yankee Stadium last night.
Read the full post here.
TRUE CONFESSION! I have neither read nor watched anything from the Twight series. When I'm in the mood for blood sucking I read the business pages.
I've seen the breathless tabloid covers of pinup boy Robert Pattison and shrugged 'meh.'
I watched the hot tease between Rob and Kristen at the MTV Awards and thought 'production.'
Neither actor has raised my temp above 98.6 -- until Kristen starting spewing smart comments about fame and celebrity.
"It's so retarded," the actress tells Vanity Fair in its December issue. "We're characters in this comic book."
Now Kristen reiterates her disdain for the game during early promotion for the Nov. 20 release of New Moon.
"I probably would've answered it if people hadn't made such a big deal about it," she told EW.com of her rumored romance with Robert.
Read the full post here.
JON AND KATE'S REALITY SHOW CONTINUES UNABATED ON TV AND THE WEB.
For an undisclosed fee, Jon will be chagrined at any made-for-web publicity event you want to pay him for.
Kate, sniff, sniff, is hurting deeply over the public spectacle her life has become. And she laments that her children are behaving badly from the strain.
As the house comes tumbling down, let's find the silver lining: the Gosselins are a growth industry in America's skeletor economy.
In addition to being the bread and butter, or wheat (Kate?) and chaff (Jon?) of America's infotainment media, contributing to Amazon's bottom line, the couple have spawned an entire market of "Gosselin" domain names; you know, the ones speculators set up for web clicks.
There's KateGosselin.com, JonGosselin.com, and, of course, TheGosselins.
There's the GosselinsWithoutPity, TheGosselinsWithoutPity.Blogspot.com, and the contrarian TheGosselinsDoNotNeedOurPity.BlogSpot.com
There's JonAndKatePlusEight.com, JonAndKatePlusEight.net and, duh, TLC's official website.
There's the oddly named SixGosselins, which conveniently lists Jon & Kate's contact info for "personal appearances/speaking engagements, media requests, endorsement deals, television/film opportunities."
And we can only guess how many -- "I beg your pardon" -- wayward visits that JohnGosselin gets. Or how many interruptions this blissfully happy-looking JonAndKate receive.
You can tell this Jon & Kate are very different from the other; they don't have their pretty site "monetized." How unAmerican!
LAST NIGHT THE YANKEES TOOK A TWO GAME LEAD OVER the Phillies with the help of the post-season's most seasoned pitcher, Andy Pettitte, who even got base hit and an RBI to tie the score in the fifth inning!
Final Score: Yanks 8, Phils 5. With Yanks ace CC Sabathia on the mound tonight, I predict the Yankees with take a three games to one lead.
For the sake of Pedro Martinez, I hope Philadelphians behave themselves.
On Thursday night, the Yankees evened up the 2009 World Series at a game a piece by squeaking out the Philadelphia Phillies 3-1 and handing a loss to their old rival, righty pitcher Martinez.
After the game, the oft-contemptible Martinez took a wide swipe at Yankees fans. No doubt this was his immature way of dealing with the loss.
Apparently Pedro had been heckled by a foul-mouthed Yankee fan who was spitting out expletives in front of his own daughter. Pedro took it upon himself to chastise the man.
That's fine, Pedro. Good for you. But, later on during a post-game press conference, you made it sound like this one obnoxious fan represents all Yankee fans!
Read the full post here.
JON GOSSELIN IS LIKE AN OPEN SORE THAT KEEPS on oozing.
Of course, we're speaking of the Jon that appears in tabloids and talk shows and "intimate" webcast confessionals. That's the only Jon I know.
I can't say what the real man's like behind closed doors; we have Hailey Glassman and Kate to tell us that.
And, surprise, surprise, this moy (my word for man-boy. See! You can make up words on the web!) is given toward emotional abuse and "mantrums". (Hailey makes words up too! We have a "connection!")
Jon's also given to hawking T-shirts, milk shakes, not wanting to be tardy for the party, and making young girls cry.
Read the full post here.
"IABSOLUTELY LOVE AND LIVE FOR GOING DOWN ON GIRLS.
In fact, I probably enjoy it more than having sex. Yet I cannot seem to find any chicks that are down with that. What am I doing wrong? Why is it so hard for me to employ my
tongue to its utmost potential? (If you have any friends who are looking for that -- even if that means no
sex -- I am more than willing to take that offer." Signed, Starvin' in the Suburbs.
Dearest
Starvin':
Your query is troubling. Many women lament the fact that their significant others feel ambivalent or repulsed by their nether-regions. Yet we have you, a reasonable man, with the opposite problem.
Can I just say, for whatever comfort it may offer, that I totally understand the draw to cunnalingus. (I love that
word!) I'm realgood at giving, and even better at receiving. And while I probably would never turn down some sweet tongue-in', there are lots of women who will and do.
Sadly, many -- if not most -- girls are terrified of their pussy. Terrified. In the 21st century, I sometimes can't believe that such anxiety still exists, but it totally does.
We are trained to think we smell like rotting fish and taste even worse. Also, allow me to remind you of the terms used to describe penises: cock, dick, etc. Pretty non-descript, yes?
What do we women get? Beef curtains, bearded clam, ham wallet, etc.
Read the full post here.
WE HERE IN THE BIG APPLE ARE FINALLY HAPPY TO BE IN A REAL WORLD SERIES AGAIN -- MEANING ONE THAT THE YANKS ARE IN.
After all, what's a World Series without the Yankees? Heck, we've played in nearly half of them.
But against Philadelphia?
Only once.
In 1950.
And we beat the cream cheese out of them in a 4-0 sweep.
So how do we feel? Well, we're not sweating too hard. Let's break it down to the top three reasons why the Yankees are better than the "Frillies":
Read the full post here.
BRING YOUR BANDAIDS AND YOUR WIPEES TO THE World Series opener Wednesday night 'cause New York and Philly fans are ready to rumble.
New York started it when the city's fishwrapper lobbed the first verbal bombs in an article headlined, "Frillies are coming to town!"
It took three provocateurs posing as journalists to rattle Phillies' fans batting cages with cliched digs about Rocky, bad fans and cheesesteaks (which they mistakenly called hoagies -- a separate and distinct sandwich -- unless you're order a "cheesesteak hoagie.") Then they insulted Philly fans' collective fashion sense, quoting some Joe Blow who thinks Philadelphians "should try reading GQ." Which totally blew the gasket of Philly Thug on fishwrap's comment board.
"I just threw booze on my computer after reading this cr@p…congrats on being better dressed…you f'in kidding me…we're taking this to the streets…too bad you'll have blood all over your cute shirt."
The dig to the city's threads also ticked off PhillyPhantastico, who wrote, "We should learn how to dress by reading GQ? Are you metrosexually serious? And by the way, first thing I saw when arriving in Manhattan was an old lady urinating into a storm drain on a street (first light after Lincoln Tunnel). Nice town."
Read the full post here.
ALTHOUGH I'M LUCKY ENOUGH TO LIVE IN A TOWN SATURATED IN MAJOR SPORTS TEAMS (Phillies, Sixers, Flyers, Eagles), I'm a fair-weather fan.
I notice when they're winning and ignore them when they're not. I attended my first game at the ballpark just last year - - free tickets. And, yeah, it's true, the game is more interesting in person, but not much.
But who can ignore the chants of "Repeat, repeat, repeat."
This city, still on a high on last year's Series win, is now bordering on delirium. National League champions again? It's pretty unbelievable. Going up against the YANKEES in the World Series. Who woulda believed it? Everybody seems to be in red, whether it's Phillies gear or not.
My bosses first question at our weekly Tuesday morning meeting yesterday? -- "Who here is a Yankees fan?" One knucklehead raises his hand but he just likes attention.
There are fan Facebook fights. The politicians are betting cheesesteaks against cheesecake. Stores are popping up in previously empty storefronts selling everything Phillies. Modell's and Forman Mills are making a killing.
The front page of yesterday's New York Post shows a Phillie in a skirt and calls them Frillies. How rude.
Read the full post here.
I'm not talking about the the Black Barbie I grew up with that was the standard Nordic-featured Barbie dyed brown.
So In Style Barbie has darker skin, and fuller nose and lips, according to Stacey McBride, the doll's designer. In other words, this stylin' sister actually looks African Americans.
"They look like people where we live," said Nikki Wright, 12, of East Harlem.
That's the point, according to the doll's designer. "I want them to see themselves within these dolls, and let them know that black is beautiful," McBride told the Associated Press.
The So In Style line features Barbie and friends Grace, Trichelle and Kara (who rocks a silver bling-bling chain as part of her attire).
In order to promote a mentoring theme, each doll is accompanied by a little sister doll who shares her interests, hence the clever acronym for the line, "S.I.S."
While the new dolls don't please all of the people, the most appropriate response to Mattel's new line is -- it's about fucking time!
It's taken Mattel 50 years after the birth of Barbie to launch its first line of Black dolls, excluding Christie, the white-washed African American counterpart to Barbie or Mattel's ill-fated collaboration with Nabisco, the Oreo Fun Barbie. (Pulled from shelves for obvious reasons.)
Read the full post here.
DOESN'T SHE LOOK LOVELY AS A PRESBYTERIANMASHJEWISH BRIDE?
Donald Trump's female mini me Ivanka married her publishing beau Jared Kushner at a New Jersey golf course Sunday, merging their families' collective green power to $5 billion, according to Forbes and Mediaite figures. (Or $8 billion, depending on whose figures you believe.)
The bride, 27, wore white Vera Wang, naturally. The groom, a sleek black tux, crooked bow-tie and receding hairline. The father of the bride gave the understated (and not fit for reality TV) toast: "Be happy and enjoy your life."
The bride is daughter of a real estate magnate and TV boss; the groom is publisher of the New York Observer and son of a once-jailed New York real estate scion.
The couple were married in a private Jewish ceremony; the bride is believed to have converted to Judaism for his family.
Like any good archetypical society couple, Ivanka and Jared will honeymoon in Africa, where Ivanka will keep us abreast of any marauding wildebeasts or feasting lions through Twitter.
Because these two know better than most that branding and social media mean everything to an upwardly-climbing New York couple.
THE ADAGE "BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR" SHOULD BE tattooed on Richard Heene's forehead. That way when he's scheming another cocamamie grab for fame he'll be reminded of his misadventure.
Here's your infamy, Richard.
In addition to the BalloonBoyGame.com, you can hear rap songs about Falcon's faux predicament, buy Balloon Boy T-shirts, and even Photoshop your own virtual helium balloon hoax.
Richard, you can now die satisfied that you've won our attention.
HIS MOTIVES MAY BE UNPURE, BUT JON GOSSELIN'S SPITEFUL HALT OF FILMING of Kate Plus Eight may be the luckiest thing to happen to those kids. Read the full post here.
Hours after TLC dropped Jon's name off its ratings-winner, the reality TV dad sought a
The unlikely ladies' man said on Larry King Live that he had an "epiphany" that raising his children on television wasn't good for them. The only thing more surprising than Jon using such a big word? For once, he's probably right.
While the media sifts through the detritus left by "Balloon Boy's" crash landing, the crazy mastermind behind the scheme continues to reveal himself to be out of touch.
In the most ironic twist to date, Richard Heene's lawyer goes on NBC's Today and says, "Do not do the perp walk for media consumption and arrest these people in full view of their children. That's child abuse. That's traumatic for kids."
Which provokes spit laughs from observers who think that might be just what the kids' need to reset their minds northward.
It's bad enough Heene hid his 6-year-old son "for the show"; what's worse is he took him on national TV and expected him to lie. No wonder the kid barfed, and it's proof that he has more conscience than wacko dad.
So far the best public flailing comes from AP's pop culture writer Ted Anthony who comments today: "Rarely are we given such an opportunity to press pause and take stock of the American experience as it is unfolding. …We have become so enamored with the spectacle that, sometimes, we risk confusing it with real life."
Read the full post here.
BY NOW, WE SHOULD BE QUESTIONING IF FALCON IS REALLY EVEN HIS NAME.
You've no doubt seen it: the video of Richard Heene and his captive family being interviewed by CNN's Wolf Blitzer shortly after the nation was transfixed by a runaway balloon purportedly carrying the 6-year-old boy aboard.
It was during this on-air conversation that the boy slipped that he didn't respond to frantic calls because "we did this for the show."
I didn't catch the drama unfolding live on national cable TV Thursday morning. So when I saw this video, what caught my attention most was the nervous twitching by the three Heene boys and their sideward glances at their dad and each other. The video suggests at least to me that Heene may be an unpredictable tyrant.
The immediacy with which the Balloon Boy unfolded live on television is a cautionary tale for our brave new world of media. Because it was all happening "live," the cable networks fed it in real time on air and Twitter lighted up with commentary. Mere hours later, websites were offering Balloon boy T-shirts for sale.
The farce was proof that television news directors don't really care if the story is real or false; all they want is live drama to spike the ratings.
Even before Gawker paid for an interview with a former assistant of Heene's who claims the two concocted the hoax, CNN interviewed a body language specialist who concluded the family was hiding something. Suspicions were rampant on the web, too, where "incredulous observers were asking: Is it all a hoax?,'' according to the New York Times.
Now that charges are pending against Richard Heene for his outrageous prank, let's hope the takeaway lesson is that television epically failed, that the public was punk'd, and that immediacy is no substitute for credibility.
THE PHOTOSHOP FLAP OVER FORMER RALPH LAUREN MODEL FILIPPA HAMILTON SPOTLIGHTS THE ONE UPSIDE TO THE DEMISE OF PRINT MEDIA: at least there will be fewer chances for girls to obsess over sickly models whose thin frames sell fashion.
It'll be harder for teens to peer askanced in bedroom mirrors while holding notebook computers in their hands. Thank God, for some reason images on a web page don't carry the same force of power as they do on the printed page.
Props to the online blogs PhotoshopDisasters and BoingBoing for stirring up reaction to the freakishly photoshopped image of Hamilton. Because of the "new media," Ralph Lauren has to answer for the desicable practice of making already thin women even thinner. Filippa, who claims she was fired for being too fat, weights 120 pounds and stands 5 feet 10 inches tall. (Note: Tavi Gethinson's parents would be smart to educate fashion's latest tool on how fashion turns on its proteges.)
While the rest of the media react to Filippa's interview on Today claiming she was fired by Ralph Lauren, here's a few snaps of what too fat looks like.
ISN'T THIS IRONIC: WOMEN WHO USE THE "THE PILL" ARE LIBERATED FROM THEIR SOCIOBIOLOGIC DRIVE FOR CADS.
Women whose hormones are regulated by the pill lose interest in the chase for alpha men and instead prefer more feminine men, according to a study published last week in Trends in Ecology and Evolution. "On the contrary, a woman on a normal menstrual cycle will have a burst of hormones around the time of ovulation that will drive her to lust after the hottest, sexiest guy in the room,'' according to an MSNBC report on the study.
You would think that women no longer impulsively drawn to the nearest lothario at the height of ovulation would be good news. But not necessarily to scientists, who wonder what the long-term implications for the species may be. And there's this: women on the pilll may also forfeit their best chances for attracting men, who find women the most attractive near their natural ovulation. What's ironic is that the pill promises sexual freedom delivers it by making us less sexually interesting.
The pill study was one of three stories on women and sex that caught my eye last week.
Salon had a long Q & A with the authors of Why Women Have Sex that touched on everything from domination, orgasms, to the "stud-slut double standard." Tthe most controversial line from the story? "Women just don't think about sex that much." Check it out.
And then there was this from
LiveScience: "For women, sex and happiness go together."
We like the idea that the headline promulgates even if the story don't persuasively make its case.
"THE NIGHT MAX WORE HIS WOLF SUIT AND MADE MISCHIEF OF ONE KIND AND ANOTHER," HE CAUGHT HIS MOTHER KISSING AND RAN AWAY FROM HOME.
And so we're off on an epic adventure in Spike Jonze's adaptation of Maurice Sendak's beloved storybook, Where The Wild Things Are.
Turns out the wild things are on an island a night's sail away from Max's home. And they're big, hairy, petty, grumbling, hungry beasts who like to rumble in the jungle.
And so when Max shows up one dark night, they don't know whether to eat him or crown him king. But Max, played by an Oregon boy named Max Records, shows them that he is just as unpredictable as they are when he goes on an impressive romp.
"I like the way you destroy stuff,"' says the monster Carol, Max's dangerously scary alter ego on the island. "There's a spark to your technique."
You can say the same thing about director Jonze, whose make-believe land has the shadowy otherworldly terrain of a child's subconscious. Here, you can meet your monsters, climb trees, run wild, howl loudly, explore freely, and yet still be afraid of the dark. The film wonderfully manifests the terror and loneliness of being an 8-year-old on the precipice of separation.
"This is all yours,'' monster Carol, played by actor James Gandolfini, tells Max. "You're the owner of this world."
Read the full post here.
ABOUT THE ONLY TIME PEOPLE ARE ACTUALLY WHO THEY SEEM IS WHEN THEY'RE toddlers singing innocent songs.
I wanted to write something about Letterman's problem and Jon Gosselin's problem, but this video is so much prettier than their mugs. 
It's by Ella ja Aleksi, two Finnish kids who sing something akin to a Values billboard in rap. Okay, whatever. I found it via BoingBoing by way of Buzzfeed, and someone else will pick it up tomorrow. Because the web is one big pyramid scheme.
Speaking of schemes, Letterman's handling of the extortion plot against him has earned him effusive praise from fans, TV muckety-mucks, and psychological spitballers.
We've all known for a long time that Dave is an equal opportunity crank, so imaging his wife as long-suffering was always a given. We're also not surprised that an underling jumped when her filthy rich boss made a pass at her. Lucky for Stephanie Birkitt that she isn't overweight and Dave's not a politician. 
I also can't help but wonder what Jon Gosselin's past defenders think of him now that he's proven himself to be a limp turd.
We are always only part of who we say we are, and always more complicated than others think.
SO JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE COULDN'T KEEP HIS DICK IN A BOX, eh? His parting croon to Jessica Biel was:
"Not gonna get you a diamond ring,
that sort of gift don't mean anything."
After three boring years on the leash, JT called it in, according to Us Weekly.
The tabs and celebrity websites have been filled with snaps of these playmates looking so very hang-dog and humdrum together. Sort of like average American couples. Boooo! We expect more from our celebrities, the better to keep our fairy tales alive! 'Cause our lives would be so empty, so devoid of purpose, if someone wasn't floating on sparkly clouds.
Read the full post here.
A CROWD PACKED THE MUSIC BOX IN CHICAGO TUESDAY NIGHT FOR A SNEAK PREVIEW OF SPIKE JONZE'S HOTLY ANTICIPATED NEW MOVIE, WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE.
Audience members laughed, they sighed, they applauded wildly -- and that was all before watching the film.
That's because the special showing was a fundraiser for 826 Chicago, a literacy nonprofit founded by wonderboy Dave Eggers, who was there in person to thank supporters. Last year alone, 826 provided free tutoring, writing programs to more than 4,300 Chicago public school students.
"It means a lot at this juncture when we can use every penny," said Eggers, author of the New York Times' bestseller, A Hearbreaking Work Of Staggering Genius. He said the event raised enough to pay a year's rent for the building 826-Chi rents at 1331 N. Milkwaukee Avenue.
Eggers, who co-wrote the movie's script with director Jonze, also brought along a small surprise: Max Records, the Portland, Ore. boy who plays the naughty Max in the adaptation of Maurice Sendack's perfect children's book. 
Before the movie, the real Max and Eggers bantered back and forth on stage, with Eggers revealing a list of indignities (sprained ankle, nausea, dog bites, seasickness, snowball in eye, near suffocation by Wild Things, sand in iPod) the young actor endured while filming in Australia.
And there was time for a short Q & A. When asked if he was familiar with Sendack's picture book, Records said that he "was probably obsessed with it until the age of four.'' And when someone asked if he expected to continue acting, he deadpanned, "It depends on the project. If the right thing comes along." The crowd erupted in laughter.
Then it was time to see the movie, smartly written by Eggers and Jonze, and a cinematic wonder to behold.
"I like the way you destroy stuff,'' one monster tells Max after one wild romp on their island. "There's a spark to your technique." As the collective motley crew considers eating Max, another says, "I hope you don't taste as selfish as you look."
Records' creative Max winsomely captures the freedom, confusion and pain of being a tween.
Read the full post here.
DIDN'T YOU KNOW?
Your parents were awesome before you were phat.
They used to be pimped out in fros', party hats, white tuxes, square sunglasses, team captain sweaters, formal gloves, polyester, mini-shorts and love beads. Mostly before you were born.
They drank, smoked, fell down, drove fast, played hard, lived, loved, frolicked, wore too much makeup, pumped iron, traveled, kissed, dressed in drag!
Then, as creeto commented on Fark, (where YPWA was provoking even more parental flashbacks), "Your parents' lives came to a screeching halt when they had you."
We predict this latest web project by self-described "visionary" Mirza (who's also "lazy," doesn't like dogs or vegetables and who spends "way too much time thinking") will be the next breakout website to go viral and have publishers twitching.
Go now! Submit a snap today! Maybe you'll meet the cutoff before it's once again verboten to see parents as humans.
A COLLECTIVE GAG GURGLED ACROSS THE WEB TODAY AS READERS REACTED to MacKenzie Phillips' revelation that she had sex for 10 years with her father, John Phillips of the Mamas & the Papas.
The news provoked widespread jeers and sneers.
"If she could keep it a secret for 30 years,'' someone named Jill wrote on EW.com, "she could keep it for another 30."
"Phillips had an alleged long-term consensual sexual relationship with her father AS AN ADULT, which makes her just as screwed up as he was,'' spewed someone writing as TK. "There is a vast difference between therapeutically airing harmful secrets versus indiscriminately vomiting this distastefulness into yet another "tell all" book.
But an empathetic Jeff commented, "How long would your personal problems last if you were molested by your own father? This latest problem seems to explain the others. Check to see if you left your humanity under the sofa, when you get home tonight."
Oprah took a lot of heat for airing the vile claims the same day the book Phillips' new book was released. But to Catholics, fans of Dostoyevsky's Crime and Punishment and psychologists, the public confession is more understandable.
The "need to reveal embarrassing and disturbing secrets might be expected to exist in direct proportion to the importance that the experience …
has for the speaker or writer's personality as a whole,'' wrote E.J. Brill in is 1975 book, The Psychology of Confession. "This need finds expression in two ways: either in personal confidences to a trusted friend or as a written description.
"In the latter case, the memories involved have perhaps left the writer no peace until he got them out of his system." He goes on to say that confesson's catharsis is "the genesis of all literary confessions since
Saint Augustine's Confessions.
Read the full post here.
BUZZFEEDERS HAD A FIELD DAY THIS WEEK FEASTING ON CUD FROM THE FIRST OFFICIAL NATIONAL SINGLE COUGARS CONVENTION.
Mature ladies on the prowl recently met in Palo Alto, Ca., to celebrate their hunt for fresh, young meat. And isn't it funny that the group specifies 'single' in the name? Wouldn't want any Ashley Madison types showing up, now would we?
Al Gore's awesome website Current sent a correspondent to cover the proceedings and, frankly, we think he blurred the line between "objective bystander" and "reporter." Which we wouldn't have any other way.
What crosses our mind though: where was Courtney Cox? We think ABC missed the most awesome chance to reach the core audience of its new show Cougar Town, which premiers tonight at 9:30 tonight Eastern.
For the record, even if we never watch the show, the show's promos are worth viewing. Welcome back, Courtney!
IT'S PERHAPS MERE DAYS BEFORE THE INEVITABLE CONFESSION SPILLS FORTH: FORMER NORTH CAROLINA SENATOR JOHN EDWARDS HAS A LOVE CHILD.
The announcement will be the final confirmation that Edwards' is a pathological liar, Rielle Hunter is an opportunist and Elizabeth Edwards has compounded her personal tragedy by avoiding the truth. No one emerges from this sordid political drama unscathed.
The truth has been a long time coming. It was in 2006 that Edwards claims to have dallied with Hunter. It's been two years ago since the National Enquirer first reported Edwards was having an affair; 14 months since that tab cornered him inside a Los Angeles hotel where he was rendevousing with Hunter, and one year since he he admitted to repeatedly lying about the affair.
Now comes word that Edwards' friend who initially claimed to father Hunter's daughter is scouting a book deal about Edward's liaison and subsequent coverup.
The New York Times reported over the weekend that former campaign aide Andrew Young tattles that Edwards' promised Hunter he would marry her after Elizabeth died and have The Dave Edwards Band play at the wedding. Mrs. Edwards has been diagnosed with untreatable breast cancer.
But Hunter, mom to 19-month-old Frances, now knows that she has and always will play second fiddle to the first and only Mrs. Edward.
In an ABC interview during which Edwards admitted to the affair, he said, "I'm in love with one woman. I've been in love with one woman for 31 years. And she is the finest human being I have ever known."
Read the full post here.
IT'S ALMOST TIME TO FEEL SORRY FOR KANYE, BUT WE'RE NOT QUITE THERE YET.
We're having too much fun spoofing his on-stage grovel to hip hop's reigning queen Beyoncé at the expense of wispy, blow-on-her-and-she'll-fall-over Taylor Swift.
It's been hard for the web to aim at other moving targets since Kanye made himself the bullseye. We grew tired of trying to keep up with all the delicious snark, so we took the liberty of compiling what we think are the 10 best servings of snide. Number 10 is Kanye reminding Keyboard Cat that he wasn't the first YouTube sensation. And the countdown to number one:
9. Someone by the name of Vince Romanelli adapts Swift's You Belong To Me into a sweet slam at Kanye. As Buzzfeed's Jack Shepherd wrote, "It's the sweetest, most soft-hearted diss track I've ever heard in my life." This is as clean as snark gets while still making its point.
8. Kanye's apology sung with autotune. I'll give it an 8 because you can dance to it while dissing.
Read the full post here.
RIP TO PATRICK SWAYZE, who died yesterday after a battle with pancreatic cancer.
You can read a full obituary of Swayze's life and death at the Los Angeles Times.
We just want to thank him for sweeping us off our feet.
STOP THE BELLY-ACHING AND PASS THE DIAPIES. I need a bottle of powdered milk and a blankie to put these celebrities down for a nap; they need it.
Kanye West melts down again. This time it was at MTV's Video Music Awards at the expense of country singing sensation, Taylor Swift.
In a category that West couldn't even be nominated for -- Best Female Video -- he once again (a la the MTV Euro VMA's, the American Music Awards & the fabled Hurricane Katrina fundraiser) spazzed the f*ck out.
West interrupted fresh-faced Swift and stormed the stage to say: "Taylor, I'm really happy for you, and I'm gonna let you finish, but Beyonce had one of the best videos of all time!"
Huh? You interrupted a 19-year-old's first acceptance speech at the VMAs to throw a tantrum!? You little sissy. Like singer Katy Perry Twittered, "IT'S LIKE U STEPPED 0N A KITTEN."
Read the full post here.
1969 WAS A FAR-OUT YEAR!
We tripped out at Woodstock, saw the first man on the moon, met the The Brady Bunch and adopted a pooch named Scooby Doo. As the hound's favored sidekick Shaggy would say, "ZOINKS JINKIES!
Mystery, Inc. opened its doors to business on Sept. 13, 1969 and has been chasing fake werewoves and witches through crime sprees ever since. As Freddy would say, Nice work, Scoob!
In honor of Scoob's hankering for snacks, we're delivering snackable news in bite-sized vittles today!
FIRST OFF, there is a not-to-be-missed piece from The New York Times on the riddle-wrapped-in-an enigma known as economics written by last year's Nobel prize winner Paul Krugman. Krugman makes haste of the idea that nothing -- not money, not fancy educations, not 200 years of free market experience -- is what it seems. And it will frighteningly reinforce the truth that no one can predict the future.
DESPITE ALL THE HAND-WRINGING, President Obama seems to have done no harm to America's school children when he told them Tuesday, "Every single one of you has something you're good at. Every single one of you has something to offer. And you have a responsibility to yourself to discover what that is. That's the opportunity an education can provide." And the Republicans are complaining? Jeez.
The Associated Press delivers a tidy summary here of the Obama Administration's missteps on its way to implementing public health care. That adage about "good intentions" immediately comes to mind upon reading.
ON THE CELEB FRONT, George Clooney debuts his latest brunette, a delusional Jon Gosselin disses soon-to-be-ex Kate and says beau Hailey Glassman makes his heart pound. Yawn.
FINALLY, THE U.K.'s Telegraph reports on a Dutch study that concludes beautiful women befuddle men's thinking. One commenter on Asylum astutely blames it on "blood flow."
September 09, 2009
ANCIENT MEDIA ICON LARRY KING boasts the first interview with Chris Brown since his felony assault conviction for hitting then-girlfriend Rihanna during a pre-Grammy scuffle in February.
In the hour-long interview, which aired Wednesday night, Brown and his mother Joyce Hawkins served up only what they wanted to share and not what everyone wanted to know.
When asked by King in a roundabout way to tell us, the public, the fans, what the hell happened to make Brown lose control and physically assault his girlfriend, he responded with the old, privacy defense and the, "I feel like I owe it to her [Rihanna] not to talk about that" reply.
That was kind of a pansy response in light of all the YouTube footage full of apologies with Brown stating that he's "not a monster."
Brown's lawyer acted like, well, a lawyer for most of the show, swatting away some penetrating personal questions when necessary.
However the trio did spill some juice, with Brown's reflections coming through loud and clear along with the emotions of his mom.
He described the night of the attack -- which garnered Brown five years probation, six months of "community labor" and a one-year domestic-violence program -- as one he wishes "he could take back." He claimed absolute ownership for the events that took place.
Not only that, but the baby blue clad Brown, topped with a matching, polka-dotted bowtie, professed to not only still being in love with Rihanna, but to also conceive of spending a lifetime with her.
Read the full post here.
I HEARD ON THE RADIO YESTERDAY THAT DJ AM DIED. I wasn't surprised after the commercial break to learn that it was a drug overdose.
When are we going to get it? Every celeb does drugs. You know that book Dear Diary? By Lesley Arfin? No? Well, I didn't read it either, but I read one issue of her magazine MissBehave, which explicitly cites drug use as casually as it rates mascaras.
Mentioning something that is obviously going on all around us isn't necessarily advocating it. Anyway, So DJ AM was found in his fancy NY apartment in sweatpants with a bag of crack taped to his chest and a crack pipe somewhere and pills everywhere and probably a bunch of crackhead model girlfriends fleeing the scene. Yeah?
Aren't we used to stuff like this? I mean, didn't we all read (or watch)
Less Than Zero and Valley of the Dolls and countless other sociological studies on why the world of celebrity, fortune, beauty and fame just really blows if you value longevity at all?
Read the full post here.
THE INEVITABLE PRICE OF SEEKING FAME ON TV IS THAT TRADING YOUR PERSONAL LIFE IS PART OF THE BARGAIN.
Just weeks after she was involuntarily held on a psychiatric hold at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center, actress/model Misha Barton opens up to Time Out New York to promote her new TV show The Beautiful Life: TBL. Barton portrays a model trying to boost her career in the show, which premieres Sept. 16th on the CW.
The mag's full interview won't hit the stands until September 10th, but in an excerpt released yesterday, the beauty tells the mag that pain from having four wisdom teeth pulled is what provoked her hospitalization.
"Here's what happened,'' she says. "I was traveling abroad for contract stuff and I went through a terrible surgery -- a wisdom tooth surgery, all four removed. It was a nightmare. I've never had surgery before -- it all went wrong and I had to have a second surgery and it almost delayed shooting because it was a nightmare to me, because I couldn't deal with the thought of not getting there on time. So with the travel, and surgery and prep for the show -- it was hell.
So how did she end up in a psychiatric hospital? "I was down in the dumps about everything there for a while,"' Barton says. "Sometimes you have to hit rock bottom about things and have to get the most stressed-out just to feel better again. I got completely stressed-out and couldn't handle everything, and now I feel really in control.
Finally, reporter Michael Freidson asks point-blank, "Was it an official nervous breakdown? Drugs?"
"I don't know. I don't know,'' says Barton, whom the magazine describes as poised and healthy looking during the interview. "I had a friend who had a quasi-nervous breakdown, but I'm not sure it's the same thing. I'm not sure I'm capable of a full-on nervous breakdown, but it was pretty bad. It didn't last that long. It was more about the pain. I have a newfound respect for people who have chronic pain."
The mag's excerpts make Misha sound a like smart lass who suffered from the success of The O.C.M and is happy to be home in New York. We're glad she's feeling better, though sorry that because she's in the public eye, she has to explain her meltdowns.
IF ONLY CRABBY HAD DEVELOPED A SENSE OF HUMOR EARLIER.
All that angst for nothing, all those rants wasting precious air time, all that striving.
If only I had taken it all less seriously, maybe I'd be raucously contorting myself with an invisible guitar, and claiming the title of "World's Air Guitarist Champion," as Sylvain 'Gunther Love' Quimene is right now.
Quimene won 2009's world air guitar showdown held in Finland on August 21st. According to AFP, "Quimene won the Championships after wowing judges with his acrobatic dance routines and outrageous outfits."
Oh, wait, Quimene, and last year's winner Hot Lixx Hulahan (shown above) probably sweated balls trying to become the world's best. I guess you just have to pick what you're gonna care about. Congrats fellas for tuning into fun and tuning out the crumbling world around.
HOT DAMN, THERE'S SOMETHING TO BE SAID FOR REINVENTING THE WHEEL AFTER ALL.
Or, in the instance of tying shoelaces, perhaps we should make a point to add 'figuratively.'
Check out these alternatives to the same old boring way we've been tying shoes since mom taught us on bended knee. There's 11 more examples over at MailDumper, a far cry from the two trillion ways to feed lace through six pairs eyelets, according to Ian's Shoelace Site! Ian, dude, get a life!
We do think attempting new tying methods is a perfect pastime for road trips, short prison stints and even school suspensions. Also highly recommend it for super ambitious parents trying to tweak a few extra SAT scores out of their offspring. Just, ahem, don't work yourself into a knot while trying!
HERE'S SOME NEWS STORIES THAT ALMOST GOT AWAY FROM US THIS WEEK:
The DALAI LAMA EXHORTED JOURNALISTS this week "to "have long noses like elephants" that "should smell in front and also behind." We agree. It's a dirty job when real reporters do it, but too many who claim the title are just poseurs.
FINANCIAL OPPOSITES ATTRACT, OR SO FOUND a study jointly performed by researchers at Northwestern University and the Wharton School of Business. The researchers suggest that "those who find it painful to spend…are attracted to people who are more liberal in their approach to money" -- even though most people say they want to marry someone with similar spending habits. Proving once again that reason doesn't factor into marriage.
A DETROIT BANK ROBBER said he started sticking banks up because he was " so stressed and depressed." He claims he first robbed to get his mother's plumbing fixed and his license "reinstated." Jimmie Lee Fortune, 29, was sentenced to only two years by a federal judge because he had been an "outstanding citizen" before his crime spree. If only that judge lived in Chicago!
AND CHARLES DARWIN WAS RIGHT AGAIN: this time it was the famed naturalist's grandson who posited in the 1950s that " fish and other sea swimmers…contribute significantly to currents as they moved forward,'' according to AFP. His theory was pooh-poohed, but a new study "goes a long way toward rehabilitating the 20th century Darwin." Those Darwins, always starting arguments.
FINALLY, A BROUHAHA BROKE OUT between psychologists and the online encyclopedia Wikipedia. A Canadian doctor published all 10 Rorschach inkblots and the most commonly given responses to them -- provoking a firestorm from shrinks who say "patients will try to outwit them by memorising the 'right' answers." The psychologist test devised in 1921 has been criticized as "frequently ineffective."
What can you deduce about us if we tell you that such psychological disobedience thrills us?
THE CHASTITY RING IS OFF HIS FINGER! SORRY, GIRLS, BUT KEVIN JONAS IS LEAVING THE MARKET!
The oldest Jonas brother proposed to his girlfriend of two years, Danielle Deleasa, just hours after a concert performance in Vancouver.
He presented her with a diamond ring he designed himself. "She said yes, yes, yes like 500 times super fast in a row," Jonas told People. Jonas, 21, met Deleasa, 22, while vacationing in the Bahamas in 2007. She didn't know who he was, which ought to be a lesson for girls everywhere: remember, the boys want to do the chasing!
The couple celebrated the engagement with about 30 close friends and family at an L.A. pizza joint Friday night.
The Jonas brothers have pledged to wear purity rings and vowed to stay virgins until they are married. We suggest that's an impossibly high standard when you've got thousands of breathless teeny boppers pounding on your tour bus and hyperventillating at your feet in concert.
Read the full post here.
SHE WAS THE BLONDE BOMBSHELL WHO CATAPULTED TO FAME ON CHARLIE'S ANGELS. She left after one season because the public's appetite grew larger than her paycheck from the TV show.
She was the Megan Fox of the moment -- gorgeous and dippy and flirty -- whose all-American good looks help sell as many as 12 million posters of her bedecked in a bathing suit.
Farrah, born in Texas, was barely paid attention to as an actress until she appeared in the made-for-TV movie, The Burning Bed.
Wikipedia gives a succinct summary of her life and her death today at age 62 of cancer.
"I will miss Farrah every day," former Angels' co-star Kate Jackson told People. "She was a selfless person who loved her family and friends with all her heart, and what a big heart it was."
But it's on YouTubewhere Farrah will remain forever young: alive and well and gorgeous.
Before reaching the heights of her fame in 1976, Farrah sold Noxema and Mercury Cougar and toothpaste and even her own brand of shampoo. The tagline for that one? "Something beautiful happens to your hair."
That's the blessing -- and the curse -- of pictures and video: They make it too easy to forget that eventually we all die.
OH, CRUEL FATE! The fairytale has turned into a nightmare.
You grant an ordinary couple their deepest wish: to create little children in their own images.
You deliver in spades, bestowing not one, not two, not three, but four, five, six, seven, EIGHT CHILDREN!
Multiply $10,867 times four, times eight and you get $347,744, the projected college costs in today's dollars for all kids at a instate public college.
That's assuming they'll make it to college, that you'll have enough formula and diapers and clothing and time to deliver them to adulthood whole.
Through some freak luck, TV producers are looking for parents of "multiples" births. You are a decently presentable couple living in small-town America, a "relatable" couple as producers like to say. You discover that they'll pay you to go on TV -- astronomical amounts that you could only dream about actually making through real work. 
The deal is inked, and every stinky diaper, every burp, every frustration is fed to the world.
Fast forward five years later and the cracks in your relationship are gaping holes. Now you're tabloid fodder and -- suprise! -- your husband is caught publicly sneaking around with a younger woman. Then some paparazzi catches you spanking a wee one, and you become the mean ugly witch in the story.
Now comes the dreaded D word and -- oh no! -- hiatus for your reality TV show. Seems it all has become a little too real for the television cameras.
Will Jon move to New York? Where will Kate live? Will they be able to keep their expensive house, the lux lifestyle, the help? And who will clothe, feed, discipline the children?
We checked the housing market in case the Gosselins are forced to downsize. Haven't they heard what happens when couples divorce?
HEARTS ARE BREAKING OVER JON & KATE'S CONFIRMED SPLIT, and Twitter is where the mourners went last night seeking solace.
"Jon & Kate'' became the "trending topic" before the night was out.
Sentiments were spilling onto the site 140 characters rapidfire. In between the five hours I slept, more than 4,000 Twitterers had shared their insights in real time, and often sans punctuation and correct spelling. A sampling:
diegocan: Jon and Kate fill for divorce on national television.
cayers131: Gee, Jon & Kate, who could have imagined that putting your personal life on TV would cause problems? In other news, water is wet."
Ashley2004: Im just so UPSET about Jon and Kate!
CouponPro: @mitchenglish siding with John. After all, who could live with Kate. Too bad for the kids, but he's done his Time.
Ben_AlperOLOB: The split-up of Jon & Kate raises a very important question: Should couples stay together for the sake of the ratings?
christiemont: Jon and Kate: Easy decision. each of them gets 4 kids. Sounds simple enough to me!
pfauzia: so it's gonna be Jon MINUS Kate plus 8?? why Gosselin couple, why?? http://bit.ly/h9uua
SweetDommi: RT @davidlpatrick @cecilyjamelia Sad abt Jon & Kate. I'd be pissed if I had 8 babies.Trust that we'd stay married til the bitter END! *amen*
bassgoddess: @foxandfriends Jon & Kate show should be cancelled, but TLC is making too much money off them ..... so more misery .... don't tune in !!
JuStMeAgAiN2009: @SpacedHaitian dont hate on jon and kate. i love them and their kids are too cute. i have watched them since the beginning
mbclarkie: So funny!!! RT: I think the last episode of "Jon and Kate" should be their children eating them. (via @dpressman)
christiemont: Jon and Kate: Easy decision. each of them gets 4 kids. Sounds simple enough to me!
SaraDuane: I don't usually swear in my Twitter stream, but the actions of some people warrant it sometimes: Fuck Jon & Kate - I feel sorry for their +8
chirpme: @WillsAndSnyder Guess the Gosslin got caught up in the money, fame and notoriety. Stand by as Kate has a breakdown. Who would blame her
RuthBerry: I just cancelled my TiVo season pass for Jon & Kate + 8. So sad. I cannot watch the train wreck. Poor babies. :-(
Applefritt3r:Going to Lancaster abd feeling bad for Jon and Kate and thier 8. Media needs to stop medling. I am talking to you TMZ
thejoelstein: Call me a dreamer, but I think a ninth kid could save that marriage
g_literati: Is there any marriage/relationship that survived reality TV? Jon & Kate was no exception...
hhbarnes:So are they going to change the name of the show to "Jon OR Kate plus 8"?
hugheskevin: My generation had Carol Brady. This one has Kate Gosselin. I feel sorry for all of you
troygoldman:doesn't want to pick sides with Jon&Kate. But I will if it will get them off my television.
CatWhelan:not sure what it was but the whole time i was watching jon&kate last night i wanted to punch jon in the face
JessMily: i wonder if Dr Phil will try to stick his big nose in Jon and Kate life to get some ratings http://bit.ly/zULoj
fuggirls:You know what, Jon and Kate? You're BOTH repellent and I wish I'd never heard of you. -- H
ohmyalex:Oh, Masters of Child Exploitation, Jon and Kate, why are you on the cover of every tabloid? When did reality tv become gossip worthy?
Had enough? It goes on like this for hours!
We now know that America does indeed care about divorce, especially when it's televised.
WOW. WHEN MARIAH CAREY MAKES A SONG DISSING your obsession with her, I think you've just lost all street credibility.
Mariah's firing back after Eminem's restraining-order worthy lyrics concerning his way-defunct "relationship" with Mariah on Relapse's Bagpipes from Baghdad.
In the song from his first album in four years, Em tells Carey's hubby Nick Cannon that he "better "back the f*ck up, I"m not playing, I want her back you punk."
Now Mariah turns up the heat in her new single Obsessed that she previewed on her website today at 4pm Eastern.
In the catchy song, Carey sings about a delusional suitor who's upset with her and is lying about numerous things including "sexing her."
Carey gets various barbs in, calling the rapper a "mom and pop" operation compared to her "corporation," and taunts that even if he was the "last man on earth, still couldn't get this."
Mariah also blames the boy's delusions on drug use. "You're delusional, boy, you're losing your mind," Carey sings. "It must be weed, it must be the E…Why are you so obsessed with me? Lying that you're sexing me."
Ouch. Is anyone else ROTFLMAO?
Shakenya Jackson boasts she is among Chicago's finest writers. She enjoys long walks in the park and dirty dishes.
I WAS A BIT SURPRISED WHEN I HEARD THAT boxer Mike Tyson got married two weeks after the tragic accident that killed his 4-year-old daughter. The wedding wasn't a planned affair; the couple did the Vegas thing.
Tyson's been married twice before -- to actress Robin Givens in 1988, and physician Monica Turner in 1997.
New bride Lakiha Spicer apparently was not the litle girl's mother. In a grainy family photograph on Bitten&Bound, mom seems to resemble Turner.
It’s evident that the newlyweds don't give a shit what people think. I'm in the "much too soon" camp. Folks react to tragedy in different ways, but it's weird even by Mike Tyson's standards.
ADAM LAMBERT CAME OUT OF THE CLOSET. YAWN. The question was never whether he was gay but why did he he wait so long to confess?
Read the full post here.
CANDY SPELLING REALLY NEEDS TO SHUT UP NOW.
The famously rich widow of TV überproducer Aaron Spelling is blaming her daughter Tori for her husband's death. The latest attack comes just weeks after Candy insisted on Huffington Post that there is no feud between the two.
If she wants to continually yammer on about mommy's and daughter's rift, she should take it up her with her girlfriends, her hairdresser, or the girls at the spa. it woudn't make her look like such a beeatch when the venom comes straight from her pinched lips.
Read the full post here.
ANY DAY NOW, A NEW JERSEY JUDGE WILL RULE WHETHER THE DONALD CAN PROCEED WITH A DEFAMATION LAWSUIT AGAINST THE AUTHOR OF A BOOK WHO had the audacity to suggest the real estate mogul and reality TV host overestimates his financial worth by billions. Read the full post here.
In the 2005 book, writer (and
The Donald took umbrage at the low numbers and sued O'Brien claiming he had damaged his street cred and potential biz deals.
While the two parties wait to see if the case moves forward, let's review some of The Donald's revelations in a deposition taken in December 2007.
The Donald reveals that he determines his wealth in part by "mental projections,'' according to a Wall Street Journal story.
May 25, 2009
THE WORLD FORGIVES HER THE SHAKY START THIS GO-ROUND BECAUSE SHE REMINDED US ALL ABOUT THE DANGER OF JUDGING PEOPLE BY THEIR LOOKS: It makes you the ugly one.
Susan Boyle emerged on stage once more in England Sunday night and received rousing applause from the audience and judges.
Has she permanently stolen our hearts? Or will Brits push her over for an underdog as American Idol watchers did state-side?
Ahh, what does it matter? We all know that, regardless of outcome, both Adam Lambert and Susan Boyle are now household names around the world.
WITH THE ECONOMY TAKING, WE WANTED to do our part to get it cooking again. Our method? A bacon haiku contest. We promised the writer of what we voted the best haiku a $100 gift certificate donated by
Nueske's Famous Applewood Smoked Meats, acclaimed by none other than the famous New York Times's foodie R.W. Apple Jr.
The end result was less than sizzling with 13 haikus filling our comment box. We deduced that enthusiasm was obviously smothered by the breakout of the unfortunately named "Swine Flu," which slandered pigs worldwide and even empowered the Egyptian government to call for the slaughter of 400,000 hogs without ONE case of the flu in their country. (That was just so wrong.)
But perhaps I'm just greedy for more, more, more when comes to anything having to do with corn-fed greasy goodness!
Read the full post here.
IDA JJUNGQVISTsounds like some type of fungi, disease or anti-depressant and I guess in a way she's more of the latter.
She's Playboy's first African-born Playmate of the Year.
This begs the question: Is this progress??
Let's explore. According to Wikipedia, Ljungqvist, born to a Swedish father and Tanzanian mother, was discovered working at a clothing store on Rodeo Drive.
She speaks three languages (Swedish, Swahili and English), has a degree in fashion design and marketing, and her father works for UNICEF. Ding, ding, ding! Reeks of entitlement to me.
See, it's not enough for women in the United States to be educated, they've got to have great knockers, a killer-smile and be objectified too. I mean, what good is a degree when you can pose spread eagle in a school-girl uniform?
Think about it. Ida came here after traveling to other countries including, Cambodia, Thailand, France and the U.K. and after arriving in the United States decided that posing ass-naked in a world's famous men's magazine was the thing to aspire to.
She grabbed the bull by the horns and became Playmate of the Year. Well, I for one am proud of the girl. She won a $100, 000, a car and a big bottle of Patron. And you thought exposing your bare breasts while riding a horse in a cheerleading outfit didn't pay off! Figuratively speaking of course. (Scoff). God Bless America!
Read the full post here.
CALIFORNIA GOVERNOR ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER is calling for a debate on the state's marijuana policy. According to a Sacramento Bee story, a recent poll found "56 percent of registered voters support legalizing and taxing marijuana to raise revenue for cash-strapped California." The issue has also been raised as a finger to help stop the leakage of California's deficit dyke.
But debate? Really, Guv'nr? I'm about talked out on the subject.
Read the full post here.
BEFORE SHE GOT SMASHED IN THE FACE, pretty young thing Rihanna was routinely snapped by the paps in sleeveless or backless sheaths that showed off her smooth skin. She wore her femininity like a prize coveted by the men and media who like their prey young and sweet.
A different Rihanna emerged Monday night at the Met's Costume Institute Gala.
Read the full post here.
THIS IS ONE OF THOSE TIMES WHEN WORDS FAIL NEXT TO PHOTOS.
Does anyone really want to read about the Metropolitan Museum of Art's Costume Institute Gala when they can size up the winners in nanoseconds?
Here's the blather in a graph: the party is hosted by fashion's high priestess Anna Wintour; dinner tickets start at $7,500; the best tables fetch $250,000; the money benefits the Costume Institute, whatever the hell that means; and unless you're rich, famous or beautiful you can't get in. 'Nough said.
Here's what you really want to know: model Bar Rafaeli dazzled in a barely-there silver dress; Emmy Rossum exuded urban sophistication in a long gray gown that flaired at the bottom; Madonna looked like something that flew out of hell; Tyra Banks' hair made her look like a deer caught in headlights; Kate Bosworth emanated classic elegance in long black gown with sheer back and sleeves.
Dare I say it but the two celebrity Jessicas -- Alba and Biehl -- looked perfectly pedestrian among the haute hotties. And Kate Moss looked almost matronly with her her hair tied up in a turban.
We hope that enough money was raised to ensure that yet another fabulous soiree is held next year to make the rest of us feel insignificant.
CROWDS OF THE CURIOUS AND THE FAITHFUL are trekking to Las Palmas restaurant in Calexico, Calif. where the cook says he has seen an image of
Our Lady Of Guadeloupe on the grill.
Now I've seen depictions of the Virgin, and I've seen pictures of the
amoeba-shaped inspiration, and I've concluded that perception really is personal.
Capturing the lunacy of the moment is this Associated Press photo showing Mexican wrestlers in costume visiting the blessed appliance.
Are times so bad that we find faith in an amorphous shape on a griddle?
Um, I guess so.
I don't mean to mock. And I'll confess that I even keep rosary under my pillow. But if the Virgin of Guadeloupe wanted to send a sign, do you think it would be one so nebulous?
Maybe I'm just cynical. Maybe she just wants to let the world know how good Las Palmas's pancakes are.
IS IT US OR DOES MEL GIBSON'S NEW LADY FRIEND LOOK LIKE OCTOMOM?
SAME long hair, same dark eyes, same upturned nose, same suspiciously puffy lips.
Wouldn't surprise us: Mel has always adored a large brood, having seven of his own with wife of 28 years, Robyn Moore.
EW reports that Mel's new girl is really Russian singer Oksana Grigorieva, but we think Nadya Suleman would make a better choice.
Just think of the sympathy he would engender? Think of the PR wars he would win!
He could distract us from his Catholic no-no of an impending divorce, and boast of helping someone in need.
Because is there anyone who could use Mel's help -- and millions -- more than Nadya?
JAMIE FOXX: Hello?
Billy Ray Cyrus: Yea?
Foxx: This is Academy Award-winning, Grammy nominated singer/songwriter, comedian extraordinaire Jamie Foxx.
BR Cyrus: You cocksu --
Foxx: Wait a minute, blame it on the alcohol!
BR Cyrus: No, you wait a minute! You slick, slimy, S.O.B --
Foxx: But I'm a comedian!
BR Cyrus: How's telling my daughter to catch chlamydia off of a bicycle or to become a prostitute like my ex-girlfriend, and I use the term girlfriend loosely, Lindsay Lohan funny?
Foxx: (chuckles) Yea, I remember those days. That damn Lohan. You remember that trick she used to do? She called it the…
BR Cyrus: Lolita?! Ha, yeah. [collective sigh and chuckles]
BR Cyrus: Back to the point! Tell that shit to my achy-breaky heart okay?
Foxx: Look, I totally understand where you're coming from, I have a daughter myself as I explained on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno.
BR Cyrus: … What? Are you plugging yourself in this apology?
Foxx: I'm deeply hurt by that insinuation. All I meant was that sometimes my comments may be a little Unpredictable, like my last Grammy-award winning album of the same name.
BR Cyrus: (breathing heavily) Are you shitting me?
Foxx: Hell no, no. I mean, use your Intuition as a father. Out here, when I'm on my satellite radio station, Foxxhole, I feel like a SOLOIST with Robert Downey Jr. or something…
BR Cyrus: That wasn't even smooth!!
Foxx: Listen, I'm not saying I'm a Golddigger…
BR Cyrus: Hanging up…
Foxx: OK, seriously, hear me out. I apologize again, man, sincerely.
BR Cyrus: Are you done yet?
Foxx: Yea, that's pretty much all I had to say. [Goes into Ray Charles impersonation] It pretty much reminds me of this time in Georgia… Geo --
[Line goes dead]
Miley: Who was that, Dad?
Billy Ray: That damn Foxxhole piece of shit.
Miley: Oh my God, he called you? You didn't tell him anything…
Billy Ray: Oh, for Pete's sake! If the goddamn chain smoking and 20-year-old boyfriend doesn't give away to the world that you're a 27-year-old playing a wacked-out teenager with multiple personalities then so be it.
Miley: Thanks Dad.
Billy Ray: For the last time, call me B. Rae, much like the alter-ego self-title of my upcoming album: Cyrus: Serious Circus.
Miley: For Pete's sake, you sound like a cracked-out version of K-Fed! I'm going to the strip club to pick up some new moves for the sex tape.
B. Ray: Miley!
Miley: Dad, it's a smoking suggestion! You're no one in this town until you get publicly.
Shakenya Jackson boasts she is among Chicago's finest writers. She enjoys long walks in the park and dirty dishes.
WE CAN'T TAKE CREDIT FOR DIGGING UP THIS YOUTUBE CLIP of Bea Arthur singing a duet with Rock Hudson. The credit goes entirely to EW.com, which warns it's likes "entering some gay bizarro meta-verse where carefree socialites harmonically chortle about amyl nitrite."
This 3:22 minute clip gives a glimpse into the alternative universe in which kids grew up in during the 70s. Network telephone shows broadcasted odes to pharmaceuticals while The Brady Bunch's dad recommended mother's little helpers in that series'first episode!
But that was before the advent of Ronald Reagan's "Just Say No" campaign, the rise of conservatism and the spread of prisons as a growth industry.
And just as Isaac Newton hypothesized every action has an equal and opposite reaction, the 80s was the answer to the earlier decade.
Bea Arthur was the provocateur par excellence. I remember as a kid watching her on Maude as she anguished over the decision to have an abortion. What was shocking even then was not the dilemma but that television and Bea Arthur actually dared to explore that gut-wrenching predicament over the airways.
No one since or before has filled her shoes.
HER SAUCY SWISH OF THE HIPS in the direction of Britain's Got Talent judges ought to have told us that there is more to Scottish spinster Susan Boyle than meets the eye. Isn't that what she herself told the judges as she gyrated on stage?
"And that's just one side of me!,'' she said as she confided her age (47) to Simon.
Now her secret's out!
When she confided to the cameras backstage that she had "never been kissed,'' Boyle was fibbing.
"That was made as a joke!," Boyle said on the U.K. morning show GMTV. "Never been kissed? I've never stopped."
After her dazzling performance, which has now been viewed more than 100 million times worldwide, an amazed Simon told her, "Susan, you are a little tiger, aren't you?"
Oh gawd, Susan, with your admission now you've gone and unleashed the dogs!
At this very moment, as the world witnesses of the prime of Miss Susan Boyle, there are probably tabloid reporters digging up any dirt that exists on you.
Broken hearts? Love affairs? Unpaid taxes? A taste for Scotch?
You can be sure that it's all coming soon to a tabloid near you.
SO NOW WE KNOW.
28 years is an awfully long time for mere mortals to live together. And nothing about Mel Gibson suggests he is merely anything.
Screen star, Christian, producer of provocatively violent flicks, closet anti-Semite, father to seven, billionaire.
Now comes the confession: he has a 24-year-old plaything.
The Russian singer blew her cover yesterday by saying in an interview, "This is serious and I hope that our union will be real and strong and long-lasting. We are different people, but Mel is a grown man and knows precisely what he wants and me too -- I know what I want."
Let's hope Mel wasn't drunk during the throes of his romance.
TOM BRADY'S NEW BRIDE GISELE BUNDCHEN is interviewed in the upcoming Vanity Fair during which she
reveals that she feels like her hubby's son is her own child.
"I understand that he has a mom, and I respect that, but to me, it's not like because somebody else delivered him, that's not my child -- I feel it is, 100 percent," she reportedly says.
What a dotty-headed thing to say! That does not sound like respect to me.
Could she want to alienate her hubby's ex-beau any more than she already has? She stole the prize. Now she's claiming her son?
Now none of us will be surprised when further custody battles ensue for John, with whom the NFL quarterback had with actress Bridget Moynahan. The couple share custody of the boy conceived shortly before Moynahan and Brady broke up.
APSYCHIATRIST TESTIFIED THAT JOSEF FRITZL IMPRISONED AND RAPED HIS DAUGHTER ELISABETH BECAUSE OF a loveless and anxiety-ridden childhood he spent with his mother.
According to the Guardian, the psychiatrist testifed that Fritzl's "behaviour had its roots in his
troubled childhood, describing a mother who did not love him, who left him to cry when he was in pain, who regularly beat him and left him on his own for hours at a time."
The deviant Austrian told the psychiatrist that he was "born to rape," that he choose is daughter Elisabeth "because she was most like me, as strong as me, as stubborn as me."
Fritzl spoke of his own basement nightmares, "when his mother Maria left him in a bunker [alone] during 1943 air raids over Amstetten when he was eight. He was abandoned for hours on end."
Read the full post here.
IKNEW LITTLE OF THE DYNASTIC ACTING FAMILY FROM WHICH ACTRESS NATASHA RICHARDSON CAME, had no idea she was the wife of actor Liam Neeson, knew scant about her work except her luminous appearance as the estranged ex-wife "Liz" in Disney's remade The Parent Trap. I remember wondering 'who is this person' while watching that film; she seemed so out-of-place from the rest of the cast.
Richardson's sudden death resulting from a freak ski accident at the
Mont Tremblant ski resort in Quebec brought all these details to my attention And by every account I've read, she was as down-to-earth as any actor could be.
Of her famous family, which included her mother actress
Vanessa Redgrave, who was abandoned by her father director Tony Richardson,
she said, "We've all been through it in one way or another and so we've had to be strong. Also we embrace life. We are not cynical about life."
She met her husband, the famous Irish actor Liam Neeson, in 1993 and married him a year later. The couple has two sons.
Of her husband, she told The Independent in 2003, "He's more laid back, happy to see what happens, whereas I'm a doer and I plan ahead. The differences sometimes get in the way but they can be the very things that feed a marriage, too."
In that very same interview, speaking of a serious accident in which Neeson broke his pelvis after hitting a deer on his motorcycle, Richardson said, "I wake up every morning feeling lucky -- which is driven by fear, no doubt, since I know it could all go away."
Here are links to stories about her life and death:
The Associated Press reports, "Natasha Richardson dies after ski fall."
The Los Angeles Times has "Natasha Richardson: An Appreciation."
Entertainment Weekly has "Natasha Richardson: A Critical Appreciation."
FoxNews.com gets it right with "Natasha Richardson: One
Of The Good Guys.".
Finally, the New York Daily News carries
"Natasha Richardson and Liam Neeson's magical marriage takes tragic turn."
Funeral arrangements are being planned in New York.
SHORT ATTENTION SPAN THEATER! Here's the biggest headlines from the last 24 hours.
First up, President Obama downsizes Tom Daschle's plans to become Secretary of Health and Human Services. Some news organizations pose the question, "Can Obama repair his image as 'change' agent? Duh, I think that's why he just dumped Daschle. And it's a good thing, too.
Obama still has the crud of Chicago's political machine on his heels (see Blagojevich, Daley et al.) so he needs to be particularly keen on keeping his image polished. Why throw away all the good will that followed him into office by hiring a man whose job would be to bite the hands that fed him $5 million over the last four years?
"I screwed up," Obama said in an interview with CNN's Anderson Cooper. No you didn't, sir. You did good.
Sam Lutfi (or Lufti, you pick) sues Jamie and Lynn Spears for slandering his name. This, on the same day that NME.com reports her former attorney Jon Eardley wrote Brit in January saying that "her civil rights were violated and that she is being bled dry by her parents, [and]...that her children are being used as pawns."
This follows just days after published reports that Britney (or, to be exact, her conservator father) had taken out restraining orders against Lutfi and her ex-pap pal Adnan Ghalib allegedly because the duo were scheming to gain control of the singer's affairs.
I hope one of these cases gets to court because I really would like to know who wears the white hat in this story.
Actor Christian Bale makes headlines with a year-old verbal assault on the cinematographer of Terminator Salvation. Bale ends his psychotic break with a, "You and me, man, we're fucking done professionally." Someone is, Christian! Crabby has one word: sociopath! Oh, and by the way, if anyone else out there has similar audio of other celebrities abusing people, Crabby would be happy to publish it!
Jen Aniston rescues strays! Ohh, a girl after my own heart. But you just know the story of her saving a dog from traffic will fuel the never-ending saga between her and you-know-who. Mark my word, it'll be just days before we hear how Brangelina intercepted whalers at sea before departing Japan.
And MySpace turns over the names of 90,000 sex offenders banished from its pages to authorities. Moms, dads, activate your computer's parental controls!
THE IRONY OF BRAD PITT COMPLAINING ABOUT THE "PUBLICITY MACHINE" as he sits down with Newsweek for an "Oscar Roundtable" seems lost on Hollywood's favorite cover boy.
"There's this whole other entity that you get sucked into,'' he complains. "You have to go and sell your wares. It's something I never made my peace with. Somehow you're not supporting your film if you don't get on a show and talk about your personal life."
This seems the ideal time for the reporters in the room to point out Brad's savvy past media manipulation for his gain; that perhaps he's there because he wants to win an Oscar.
But then again maybe there weren't any reporters in the room? For even so-called august media outlets like Newsweek don't want to bite the hands that feed it newsstand coffers, and and so we end up with a self-congratulatory Q&A with La La Land's shiniest (and in at least one case, this means greasy) stars of the moment.
Yet perhaps because of the collegial company, the Oscar contenders Pitt (The Curious Case of Benjamin Button), Robert Downey Jr. (Tropic Thunder), Anne Hathaway (Rachel Getting Married), Frank Langella (Frost/Nixon), Sally Hawkins (Happy-Go-Lucky) and Mickey Rourke (The Wrestler) reveal more than they might realize.
The most obvious observation at least in my eyes is that the most flawed individuals -- Mickey Rourke and Robert Downey Jr. -- are the most intriquing. The scars on their spirits are palpable, with Mickey self-conscious of the punch line he's become, Downey always the joker when confronting his past addictions.
Despite both making "comebacks," I get the sense that both men could slide back into the comfort of failure and its lack of expectation. Real pain is always a better story.
"It's been way over 10 years since I gave everything to anybody,'' Rourke said of his character in The Wrestler.. It was a good feeling at the end of the day. I'd forgotten what it felt like.''
"You might have had a slow 10 years,' Downey says later to him. "But I basically wasn't in my body for 25, and I have like 65 credits during that period of time. I think the work kept me grounded, and having a call sheet was the only stability in my life. I have a much more relevant question. Mickey, will you please consider being in "Iron Man 2"?"
Pitt, despite living at the top of Status Mountain, seems oblivious to the caricature of a Hollywood A-lister that he's become.
Read the full post here.
By Natalie Melendez 
RUN FOR COVER! STOCK THE PANTRY! Because you know the U.S. is dangerously unstable when the plastic surgery industry hits the skids.
In a recent poll, nearly 60% of women admitted the economy was forcing them to defer their, ahem, investment in plastic surgery.
La La Land’s surgeons say business has dropped nearly 60 percent this year compared to 2007.
Bluntly, this means the average middle- to upper-middle class, insecure, self-loathing 18- to 50-something-year old isn’t going to get that cosmetic fix to solve her problems this year. Little Cate isn’t going to get those breast implants as a graduation present after all; she’ll have to settle for a water-bra instead.
It’s a sad, sad time for the men and women who believe their lives would be better, if only the credit crunch wasn’t denying them access to that coveted butt lift or those youthful hair plugs!
But I have a hunch there's still a viable market for cosmetic plastics in the celebrity “niche.”
Even with plastic surgery on the down-and-out in Beverly Hills, what’s to stop stars like Jennifer Aniston from dropping a couple grand on the help of a surgeon’s skilled scalpel? With multi-million dollar earnings from this season’s tour-de-force Marley & Me,” (cough, cough), and those Friends’s residuals, surely it’d be no skin off her nose, figuratively speaking of course.
Read the full story here!
Natalie Melendez is a work in progress. Currently she resides in an undisclosed mountainous California location, where she spends her time studying, writing and roasting chestnuts by the fire. You can email her here.
By Crabby Golightly
BILL MURRAY HAS GOT TO START CRASHING PARTIES with a better crop of players.
Who wants to wander into a crowded apartment, drink a few beers, spin with the babies, and then be told by some social jerkwad that you’re making bad choices?
Apparently, Mr. Murray was forced to confront such bad manners at a party he breezed through in New York City recently. To which I say, 'Who the fuck are you, punk, to tell Murray he’s making bad choices?' It's not like he's cheating on his wife or anything.
Let me guess: You are an MBA student preparing to wreak havoc on America’s already decimated financial system.
You are a snot who crawled out of your comfort zone to meet women because rarely do they ever enter your own social sphere.
You are a boorish bore who sneers at bi-sexual socials, previously closeted in some all-boy prep school and ready for your pre-arranged marriage.
You are a closet misogynist, jealous of the attention that Randy Billy pulled away from you.
Bill, on the other hand, doesn’t take himself too seriously. He likes to karaoke, smoke pot, and chat up pretty girlies. Where’s the crime in that?
He golfs, travels, and gets down with the real people as opposed to the myriad list of La La Land's phonies who would have nothing to do with your ilk.
When you are 58, have made iconic movies including Ghostbusters, Lost in Translation, Rushmore and Groundhog Day I’d say you’ve met your quota for gifts to humankind.
Mr. Dickwad, what will you leave for the rest of us to remember you by?
Bill, keep keeping it real.
Read the full post here.
By Jason Wilfong 
ONE OF MY BIGGEST PET PEEVES ABOUT AMERICA'S CELEBRITY-CRAZED CULTURE is that these media anointeds think and feel anything goes for them.
Case in point: Ashlee Simpson and Peter Wentz, who just had their second child. Hurray for childbirth.
But I'm bemused when I hear about celebrities playing their game of "can-you-top this?" in the child-naming department. So what did these "loving" parents name their new son? (Drum roll, please)....B-R-O-N-X M-O-W-G-L-I! WTF! They named their kid after a disease!
According to the blog The Pop Eye, author "Rudyard Kipling made up the name up and, according to the "language of the forest," it means "frog." Poor Rudyard. He had to project the pain caused by his own name by making up a terribly-named character.
I understand that some people love certain books and choose to name a child/children in its honor. Bruce Willis and Demi Moore? They named their daughter Rumer after the British novelist Rumer Godden, and daughter Scout -- because of their affection for the novel, To Kill A Mockingbird. But, come on, there are limits.
What drug was Nicholas Cage doing when he named his child Kal-El -- or the ficticious Superman's real name on Krypton? Who does Paula Yates think she is when she names her kids Pixie, Heavenly Hiraani Tiger Lily, Fifi Trixibelle and the incomparable Peaches Honeyblossom Michelle Charlotte Angel Vanessa? (Oh, I forgot, Yates is dead).
Gwen Stefani may be a rock goddess, but she became total parental dufus when she named her new baby, Zuma Nesta Rock. And illusionist Penn Jillette better teach his kid how to disappear quick with the name Moxie CrimeFighter. Come to think of it, it sounds as though Penn is setting this kid up to have to defend herself.
Where did this trend of outrageous child-naming come from? I blame Frank Zappa. Zappa named his kids Dweezil, Moon Unit, and Diva Thin Muffin Pigeen (and the relatively respectable in comparison, Ahmet ) and we all know what happened to them? (Well, actually, no.)
His experimenting paved the way for all of the Apples, Kal-Els, and Bronx Mowglis of the world. Or maybe the Wentz's just have an unnatural love for New York and The Jungle Book? Ugh.
Jason Wilfong of Chicago, believes he has unrecognized genius. He also loves sports, comic books and good music. You can reach him via email.
By Shakenya Jackson
M“Mr. West is in the building. Swagger on a hundred, thousand, trillion.”
Ya’ll like that line from “Swagger Like Us”? That was mine. I told Kanye to write it and he wrote it. Hell, the line wrote itself. Let me introduce myself: I am Kanye’s swagger. I know some of ya’ll aren’t that bright so let me tell you who and what I am.
Swagger or a person’s “swag” is their very essence, their sexy. It’s the way you walk into a room and command attention. It’s a (not-so) subtle air of superiority many celebrities possess (and even the occasional nobody). Swagger is so powerful it that should damn well speak for itself and I’m gonna.
That was me in England that screamed when that paparazzo clown tried to photograph me. I pushed the camera back in that guy’s face. I did it cause it’s not Kanye they want, it’s me, the swagger. Same thing in LAX. I broke that fuckin' camera cause I need compensation for my photos. Swag costs, babies.
I gave ya’ll a few for free when I told ya’ll Bush doesn’t care about Black people. I interrupted those guy’s acceptance speech at the MTV Europe Music Awards and told ya’ll I should’ve won video-of-year because Pamela Anderson was in the fuckin' video. A nobody like Kanye pulling Pamela “Boob Supreme” Anderson in a music video was a swag-tastic maneuver and you imbeciles didn’t appreciate it.
I told Kanye to call himself the Louis Vuitton Don. Why? Because it makes him sound important. I told him tight pants were hot and to put on pastel. Why? Because I take risks. Hell, I even told him to use that Auto-Tunes after T-pain had used it on 4,000,000 or so top-selling singles. And what happens? Boom! Love Lockdown storms the charts, baby. I make his blog worth talking about by posting the most obnoxiously expensive items and hottest women on a planet, that without a doubt most of you commoners can’t pretend to afford and can’t afford to date.
The bottom line is this: swag makes rappers hot. Kanye ain’t nobody without me: I make you love him or hate him. I make him hot, and if you don’t see him generally making an ass out of himself from time to time, I’m not handling my business. But for right now, “swagger on a hundred-thousand-trillion.”
Shakenya Jackson is among Chicago's finest writers. (She believes in the power of swag.) She also enjoys long walks in the park and dirty dishes.
By Ryann Flynn 
I'M GONNA SAY IT LOUD AND PROUD: I’m a John Mayer fan. I’ll give you a minute to come up with some clever insult. Feel better? Great, now let’s move on.
Admitting liking John hurts less than that time in third grade when I had to confess to wearing a training bra. It hurts less, guys, than admitting that you use Nair to remove hair from your forearms.
Now the buzz is that John is in talks with CBS to do his own 60s-style retro variety show. But the news just sets him up for more verbal stabbings.
“Has he become a has-been already?," one hater wrote at justjared.com.
I’m baffled why the gorgeous, rich and talented John has gotten such a bad rap. Sure he was routinely dissed on the Family Guy. I’ll admit he came off as a bit of a fuck when he told TMZ that he didn’t want to ‘waste’ Jennifer Aniston's time. And, yeah, he wears that “womanizer” tag well. But it’s not like he’s some righteous vegetarian.
I’ll give you this though: he’s got this “J’’ thing going on with his girlfriends: Jennifer Love Hewitt, Jessica Simpson and Jennifer Aniston. Weird.
But don’t love or hate John Mayer because of “Your Body is a Wonderland.” Listen to the duet he performs with B.B King on King’s song Hummingbird. Sample his album Try. Or even better -- go see John play a live show. What's the worst that could happen? I mean, it's not like I'm asking you do to something crazy, like vote for Palin in 2012.
Ryann Flynn is an avid recycling, Gimlet-drinking, Chicago Cubs-loving art director trying to bust into advertising. You can check out her work at ryannflynn.carbonmade.com.
LINDSAY LOHAN HAS DUMPED LIVIN' LA VIDA LOCO TO GET SERIOUS with presumed girlfriend Samantha Ronson. And shamelessly taking her place on La La Land's skeevy stage is her attention-starved mom Dina.
Despite recently punching a paparazzi in the face (which is fair game if you ask me, or Kanye West, or a Baldwin brother), the former party monster has miraculously remained drama-free of late. In sharp contrast, last year's Lohan unraveled in the public eye with each coke-laced scenario more sordid than the last. In short, 2007's milestones included:
~ DUI.The heavily-bronzed “hip mom” Dina defended Lindsay's disasters by selling her story to Harper’s Bazaar and hitting LA's paparazzi-plagued restaurants, all the while feigning surprise in her best outfits, claiming innocence and making distressed faces.
~ Crotch shot.
~ DUI.
~ Coke-binge-bumper cars.
~ Writing love letters to a lesbian.
~ Another crotch shot.
By Crabby Golightly
HE WAS ALREADY FAMOUS FOR WINNING EIGHT MEDALS AT THE 2004 OLYMPICS. Today, Michael Phelps becomes legend, becoming the winningest Olympian in history with 11 medals to his name.
The Baltimore native, who some have preposterously called an "average" 23-year-old, has three more competitions left to swim in Beijing. Three more chances to protect his herculean record for decades to come.
"He is just another person, but maybe from a different planet,” Russian Olympic swimmer Alexander Sukhorukov told the Associated Press. Or perhaps Phelps is just alien while standing on terra firma.
No matter, because Americans will be claiming him as their own and boasting of his record-breaking feats in five of the five meets he's dominated so far. Phelps' two goldwinning performances propelled him to the top of the news cycle, followed rightly so by the second-place finishing U.S. Olympics gymnastics team.
China's underaged acrobats consistently outperformed the Americans, the exception being the deceptively steely-minded 16-year-old, Shawn Johnson. We'll see her next time, I'm sure. The U.S. gymnasts took the silver medal.
After the U.S. team shaved more than four seconds off the world record for the 800 freestyle relay team, coming under 7 minutes for the first time, Phelps gave a brief interview in which he appeared modest and unfettered from his own celebrity and accomplishment. Recognition of his accomplishment had yet to settle in.
Phelps confessed he had teared up a few times, but hadn't found words to express his feelings. To which I say, no need, Michael. Let the pundits and commentators wax poetic. All you need to do is stand tall, smiling ear to ear, dripping wet.
By Crabby Golightly
ANTHROPOLOGISTS AND SOCIO-BIOLOGISTS CONTEND THAT HUMANS ARE HARD-WIRED TO SEARCH FOR GOD or its nonsectarian equivalent, the meaning of life.
Examples abound about our constant craving: everything from the "Obama Phenomenon," to the Oprah swoon to a plumber seeing the Virgin Mary in a rusty sink and Princess Diana conspiracy theories all point to our relentless search for meaning. To believe in nothingness seems against our nature.
Dr. Randy Pausch has joined our panthenon of purpose. The Carnegie Mellon computer science professor whose last lecture became an Internet sensation and bestselling book cowritten by Wall Street Journal reporter Jeffrey Zaslow, has died of pancreatic cancer at age 47.
Professor Pausch delivered his last lecture on "childhood dreams" last September, about a month after he received his terminal diagnosis. He filled the 76-minute talk with stories about his apparent idyllic childhood, his childhood to-do list, and his life's work. Among the lessons he imparted were these quotes:
"Loyalty is a two-way street."
"When you’re screwing up and nobody’s saying anything to you anymore, that means they gave up...When you see yourself doing something badly and nobody’s bothering to tell you anymore, that’s a very bad place to be. Your critics are the ones telling you they still love you and care."
"Apologize when you screw up and focus on other people, not just yourself.”
“Remember brick walls let us show our dedication. There are there to separate us from the people who don’t really want to achieve their childhood dreams. Don’t bail; the best gold is at the bottom of the barrels of crap.
"When you do the right thing, good stuff has a way of happening. Get a feedback loop and listen to it. Your feedback loop can be this dorky spreadsheet thing I did. Or it can be just one great man who tells you what you need to hear. The hard part is the listening to it. Anybody can get chewed out; it’s the rare person who says, “Oh my God, you’re right."
"Don’t complain; just worker harder....Be good at something. It makes you valuable. Work hard. Find the best in everybody. Be prepared. Luck is truly where preparation meets opportunity."
"You can’t get there alone – People have to help you, and I do believe in karma. I believe in paybacks. You get people to help you by telling the truth, being earnest. I’ll take an earnest person over a hip person every day because hip is short term. Earnest is long term."Listening to the lecture might cause you to think that the euphoric-seeming Pausch really was in denial, despite his direct rejection of this charge. "I don’t know how not to have fun. I’m dying and I’m having fun. And I’m going to keep having fun every day that I have left."
By Crabby Golightly
YOU CANNOT CALL AN "OOPS, WE WERE WRONG,'' AFTER 12 YEARS OF PUBLIC SCORN AN ADEQUATE APOLOGY. You cannot ever make whole again the family that lost a 6-year-old daughter to murder, and then an accused mother to ovarian cancer.
Every aspect of the lurid tale that began on December 26, 1996 has been tragic. Now, more than a decade after the mysterious death of JonBenet Ramsey, and the subsequent fingering of her parents as suspects, Boulder County (Colo.) District Attorney Mary Lacy has apologized for the office's handling of the case which contributed to public contempt for John and Patsy Ramsey as their daughter's murderers.
"We believe that justice dictates that the Ramseys be treated only as victims of this very serious crime," Lacy wrote in a statement that has been criticized by some law enforcement analysts. "...To the extent that this office has added to the distress suffered by the Ramsey family at any time or to any degree, I offer my deepest apology."
In a separate letter to Mr. Ramsey, Lacy added, "No innocent person should have to endure such an extensive trial in the court of public opinion." 
She also added, "I am aware that there will be those who will choose to continue to differ with our conclusion," a point underscored by posts on comment boards around the web: "Funny how they skipped town as quick as they could. That's a sign of innocence? The parents are sick perverted child killers," wrote someone signed Sepulture68.
Famed pathologist Cyril Wecht who wrote a book on the case, expressed his own doubts about the "new" DNA touch evidence that purportedly clears the Ramseys as suspects.
The gross injustice of being falsely accused of murder can never be righted. And unless you are a fortune teller, there is no way to know if this baffling crime will ever be solved.
But here's my question: Is there a right and wrong way to react to murder? Do we have a right to expect people to respond as we imagine we would? Is there only one way to respond to accusation? For it seems that the Ramseys' reactions were always part of what fed suspicion.
The family fled the Colorado area after the crime, and avoided investigators' questions. Neither of those facts equal guilt. And in an interview expressing relief about his exoneration, John Ramsey's cerebral, unemotional responses leaves viewers detached from his emotional horror.
When asked what receiving the letter means to him, Ramsey replied,
"After all, they know where you are,'' Google CEO Eric Schmidt was quoted as saying in an AP article. "You're driving along and it says, 'Eric, you had pizza yesterday and there's a hamburger stand on the right.' In theory, location-based advertising will be very good for business and useful to the end user."
To this I say, "harrumph." And then let me direct unwitting consumers to the book "Feed," M.T. Anderson's terrifying ideation of a near future when people have chips implanted in their brains to deliver a constant "feed" of advertising. If you haven't read it, I suggest you run to your nearest bookstore, grab a copy and immediately devour it. (Or, for those of you who are able defer gratification for the 40 percent discount, any online bookstore will do.) Once you make it past the disorienting first chapter, you'll quickly find yourself wide-eyed in terror at the implications of all this "technology" we so eagerly lap up.
Feeding ads inside the brain is not as farfetched as you might think. Last December, National Public Radio's show, "On the Media" reported about a billboard in New York which was "emitting highly focused sound that resonates within the skulls of passersby." OTM summarized it as "a novel way of advertising, a potentially terrifying intrusion and, according to technology writer Clive Thompson, the leading edge of a new civil rights battleground - the right to privacy in your own mind." Thompson introduces us to the Center for Cognitive Liberties, which is at the forefront of this looming sci-fi privacy battle. Check out the interview here, but to skip advertisement, fast forward 40 seconds.
Google, which christened its foray into big bigness with the motto, "Don't be Evil," might be losing its way. For all the amazing services offered by Google, including Google Earth, Google Maps, Google Books, and of course its invaluable search engine, the truth is Google closed Friday at $566.40 because of its muscle in internet advertising. And greed might be a part of that bottom line: in my own "bite the hand that feeds" way, I'll reveal here that I have paid as much as $10 for one Google click but have received about two cents back for each ad placed on this page. Won't be long now before Google founders Larry Page and Sergey Brin will be dethroning Bill Gates from the top of the world's richest list.
In a strange coincidence, another story that popped on the web Friday was of study in which behavioral scientists concluded that lonely people are more likely to anthropomorphize their pets and possessions. Now the same scientists plan to study further whether promoting human feelings toward objects should be used as a treatment to cure loneliness. Sorry, guys, I think the techies have beaten you to the punch. The overall message being delivered? Our possessions are our best friends. Now if you'll excuse me, I've got to go talk to my cats.
Ledger was an "actor," not a star, and he seemed to relish the difference. He stayed far away from La La Land and settled in Brooklyn, where he was apparently one of the borough's best known residents. He took risky roles, most recently playing one of the incarnations of Bob Dylan in the movie, "I'm Not There." And his image will soon be resurrected at the box office in the role of a more sinister Joker in "Dark Knight" than even Jack Nicholson played in 1989's "Batman." Christopher Nolan, the director of "Dark Knight," recently said of Ledger's performance,"He's extremely original, extremely frightening, tremendously edgy." The actor himself complained in a New York Times' interview in November that his mind wouldn't let him rest, that he was having trouble sleeping. Apparently, the tiredness caught up with him.
In another, older interview, this one with the Associated Press seven years ago, Ledger confided that soon after he starred in the movie "10 Things I Hate About You,'' he was offered -- and rejected -- a handful of other teen flicks. But despite raised eyebrows from his parents and agents, Ledger refused to compromise and held out for roles he relished. He said the decision wasn't hard for him, but "it was hard for everyone else around me to understand. Agents were like, ''You're crazy." My parents were like, "Come on, you have to eat."
Many of us have peripheral or personal experience with the solace that comes from a puff, a snort, a pill, a bottle. The dream-like haze can keep life's uninvited compromises at bay for a little while. And sometimes, even if by accident, for ever.
For those who cannot wait until the first pictures of the progeny of Nicole Ritchie, Christine Aguilera and Courtney Thorne-Smith, here is a snap astrological profile of the three baby Goats as calculated by Astrolabe.
Sun in Capricorn
Extremely serious and mature, you are capable of accepting responsibilities and do so willingly. Others expect you to be dutiful as a matter of course. You tend to get angry when people get rewards after not having worked anywhere near as hard as you. You are goal-oriented and an achiever by nature -- you're a hard worker and are justifiably proud of the tangible results of your efforts. You tend to have "tunnel-vision" -- this allows you to block out extraneous matters that might distract others and to concentrate totally on the matter at hand. As such, you are the ideal one to manage or administrate any ongoing project and to be practical and efficient at it. You are not a fast worker, but you are quite thorough. You are known for being totally persistent, tenacious and tireless in reaching your goals.
Moon in Pisces You have strong feelings and are extremely sensitive. It would help if you had a thicker skin -- you tend to react emotionally to every situation you come across. Kind, gentle and considerate of the feelings of others, you are good at taking care of the sick, wounded and helpless. But you tend to absorb the energy of others -- so avoid thos
