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BOTOX SHAREHOLDERS MUST BE FROWNING AFTER its maker Allergan agreed to pay $600 million in fines for "misbranding" the wrinkle-fighting product in sales to physicians.
Read the full post here.
TUESDAY'S NEWS BROUGHT US STARK ILLUSTRATION OF THE PHRASE, "IT'S A DOG'S LIFE."
We had dying dogs -- puppies casually tossed in a river by a teenage girl. And dyeing dogs -- pics of pups in China getting their hair colored.
If you needed glaring examples of the crap shoot that life is, these stories provided them.
Read the full post here.
THE WORLD'S PLAYGROUND JUST GOT ANOTHER PLAYA: US Mag is reporting that Tiger Woods has snapped up a condo in downtown Manhattan, and some are assuming it's to be closer to his No. 1 mistress, Rachel Uchitel.
And If TMZ can be believed, the serial husband stealer is reportedly keeping her fingers crossed -- if not legs -- that Tiger comes hunting again.
Read the full post here.
THE WORLD LOVES CELEBRITY MUGSHOTS and Paris Hilton knows that.
After being dumped by the paparazzi who made Lindsay Lohan the queen of the tabloids, Paris Hilton's now back to earning headlines with her new arrest for possessing 'coke.' Only now we can add 'dumbest criminal' to her heiress title.
Read the full post here.
IN A WAY, JOAN HOLLOWAY IS THE PERFECT metaphor for the London Fog brand: a snappy secret weapon you want handy during storms.
And so the iconic outerwear label smartly chooses Mad Men's Christina Hendricks to feature in its fall campaign.
"London Fog is a classic brand, which I love," Hendricks coos on command.
Read the full post here.
IN A DESPERATE MOVE TO PROLONG THEIR 15 MINUTES ON THE WORLD'S STAGE, The Hills' stars Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt keep spawning dramas for the tabloids.
After Heidi announced that she plans divorcing her husband of one year, Spencer fired back, telling TMZ that he has a sex tape of Heidi that he'll release if she doesn't halt the proceedings.
The alleged sex tape features not just Spencer and Heidi, but Heidi and Karissa Shannon, half of the twin set that used to hook up with Hugh Hefner.
The faux drama continues with estranged husband and wife now snapped together in Costa Rica, where they reportedly fled to 'reconcile.'
"We're working things through," Spencer told MTV News. "Clearly I care for her, but the divorce is a superficial title 'cause I didn't cheat on her. And then she divorces me to clean her image."
Not only does Heidi want to clean her image but also her body.
She gave an interview to Life & Style saying she's still in severe pain from her many procedures and that she feels "trapped" in her body. She wants her G-cup implants out.
Heidi's latest pronouncement comes just a week after her plastic surgeon Dr. Frank Ryan died in a car crash. She told Life& Style that besides not being able to hug her dogs she can't live a normal life.
"I'm obsessed with fitness but it's impossible to work out with these boobs," she says. "It's heartbreaking. I can't live an everyday life."
Read the full post here.
The songwriter wrote Lion Sleeps Tonight in 1961 and it became a hit for the Tokens, then subsequently was covered by Robert John, Brian Eno as well as being featured in The Lion King.
"The song leads a magical life,'' Weiss one remarked.
Read the full post here.
WEARING THE STUDIED GRIMNESS THAT IS DE RIGUEUR of fashion's sirens, Christine Staub makes her print debut in the September issue of Blackbook.
Staub is the teenage daughter of a certain debauched N.J. housewife rumored to have released her own home-grown porn. But for the sake of the woman-child, we'll not name her here.
Read the full post here.
THE SLICK PHOTO SHOOT DEPICTING MODEL AS AN OIL-SICK, BEACHED MERMAID brilliantly reveals the Gulf spill's stain on the world's consciousness.
The provocative 24-page spread in the August issue of Vogue Italia is triggering a wave of reaction, with some suggesting that fashion photographer Steven Meisel has veered into exploitation.
Of course he has. Isn't that what fashion photography is all about?
But these images of model Kristen McMenamy lying in pools of oil, coughing for air, remind us of the travesty that's taken place in the Gulf region more vividly than all but the photos of the region's sickened birds.
Read the full post here.
FANTASTICALLY TWEE. [fan tas ti ke li twi]. adj.
Origin: UK, pejorative.
1. Whimsy without wit.
2. Mimsy-mumsy sweetness without any kind of bite.
3. Overly quaint, dainty, cute or nice.
Ex: I find Audrey Hepburn fantastically twee.
And proving she doesn't have a twee bone in her body, Emma Thompson skewers the actress and fashion icon Audrey Hepburn with a jab, erroneously dismissing her as a "guy's thing." (Sorry, sister, she's a girl's fantasy.)
Read the full post here.
SPRUNG FROM HER DEVASTATING IMPRISONMENT (THAT'S SARCASM), Lindsay Lohan faces another 90 days of rehab. Afterwards she'll face the equally daunting task of rehabilitating her tattered reputation and career.
The troubled starlet was supposed to begin taping Matthew Wilder's Linda Lovelace biopic Inferno this month. He has said that he'll wait for Lindsay. "Not moving on, not re-casting, not under any circumstances," Wilder told a reporter after Lindsay was sentenced.
Read the full post here.
CONTINUING ITS DOMINION OVER A-LISTOPIA, VANITY FAIR'S September issue stars this minute's pop mania, Lady Gaga.
In the interview, which hits the newsstands August 4, Lady G reveals that she has deep, dark secrets, some of which she'll be glad to share.
First and foremost: Stephani Germanotta is "lonely," and she fears her deep wells of creativity seeping from her vagina if she has sex.
"I have this weird thing that if I sleep with someone they're going to take my creativity from me through my vagina,"' she tells contributing editor Lisa Robinson.
Read the full post here.
IN AN ELEGANT POLEMIC she wrote for the Washington Post for Easter 2008, Anne Rice's insoluble belief in God bolstered my own tempestuous faith.
"Look: I believe in Him. It's that simple and that complex," Rice wrote in opening her 1,100 word essay in which she recounts her baptism into belief.
Read the full post here.
MONSTERS! THEY'RE JUST LIKE US!
They grow up, grow old, fall in love, get married. Or if you're a celebrity monster -- specifically a Munster, you hook up with your "biggest fan" 50 years later and pop the question.
Butch Patrick, 57, who played the knickers-wearing wolfboy in the zany 1960s TV series The Munsters is engaged to a former Philadephia Eagles cheerleader with whom he corresponded with when he starred on the TV show.
"My first crush was Butch Patrick,'' retired pharmacist Donna McCall, 55, said in May.
Read the full post here.
CONFIRMING WHAT WE ALREADY KNEW INTUITIVELY, a new study concludes that the owners of iPads are selfish elites not prone to altruism. Which means you should think twice before sitting next to that guy browsing one on the airplane.
The consumer research firm MyType surveyed 20,000 people between March and May of this year and found that wellheeled iPad owners "scored terribly in the areas of altruism and kindness," Wired reports.
Read the full post here.
MAD MEL GIBSON CONTINUES TO GIVE NEW DEPTH OF MEANING TO THE PHRASE "CRAZY IN LOVE."
In the latest poisonous rant toward Oksana Grigorieva, Mel seems to suggest that accepting abuse is the duty of a woman in love. "You're not a f-----g woman I want. You can't hang,'' Mel tells the mother of his infant daughter Lucia. "...You don't know what the f-ck it means to make a man happy."
In seven secret audiotapes, the public has heard Gibson threaten, debase and accuse Oskana of not loving him.
"You f-cking don't love me one bit,'' Mel says on the audio released today by RadarOnline. As if loving him could change this story's ending; Oksana barely responds while Mel beats her with words.
Mel tells her he's sorry he had a child with her, calls her a "glum" and a "fickle c-nt," and in what has been a pattern throughout the audios, reminds her who owns the house she's living in. "And remember who's f-cking roof you're under! You ingrate bitch!," he yells.
According to RadarOnline, Oksana left Mel's Malibu house Feb. 18 and has not returned.
Thankfully, this latest audio runs only 2:27 minutes. Here's the full transcript:
"No One Will Believe You: Transcript Six Of Menacing Mel's Manic Meltdown.
Transcript Five Of Mel's Mental Meltdown.
Can't Look Away: The Fourth Transcript Of Mel Gibson's Descent Into Madness.
More Mad Mel: Transcript Of Radar's Third Secret Mel Gibson Audio.
'You Should Just F-----g Smile and Bloooow Me': Transcript Two Of RadarOnline's Mel Gibson Crazy Tirade.
Here's the Full Transcript Of Mel Gibson's Sickening Rant Released By Radar.
Read the full post here.
SEEMS MISS FIRE CROTCH IS GETTING HER NEW ROOMIES hot under the collar.
What Los Angeles Sheriff's officials dub as "no special treatment" is being interpreted by inmates at the Central Regional Detention Center as "special handling."
"All the inmates are sick of Lindsay," Maria Medina, a relative of an inmate, tells People.
Read the full post here.
THE SLUDGE KEEPS GETTING THICKER IN THE SLIME WRESTLE between Mel Gibson and Oksana Grigorieva.
Allegations of Mel's death threats and beatings now give way to claims of Oksana extorting money and falsifying injury.
TMZ reports that the L.A. County Sheriff's Department is investigating whether Oksana tried to extort money from Mel in exchange for keeping the disturbing audios of his abuse secret. "Extortion allegations have been brought to our attention and we are certainly going to be looking at that," a sheriff's spokesman says.
Besides the revelation that Mad Mel's touched in the head, the most shocking thing about this seedy soap opera is that Oksana's recorded evidence doesn't seem enough to protect her from suspicion.
Even the ersatz sophisticate Whoopi Goldberg seems to think that all Oksana had to do was call the police.
Read the full post here.
DOES SOMEBODY AMONG LINDSAY LOHAN'S CAGE KEEPERS have a script in a drawer somewhere?
Just three days into her expected 14-day sleepover in jail and the spoiled starlet's purportedly already getting special favor, according to reports.
"White Oprah" Dinah Lohan, along with baby sis Ali, showed up Wednesday for a visit. And on Thursday, LiLo's sometime-girlfriend Samantha Ronson popped in for some face time. Typically, inmates are only allowed to receive visitors on the weekends. When she was asked outside the jail how Lindsay's doing, Ronson sniped, "How do you think she's doing?"
Read the full post here.
THE FOLKS AT RadarOnline gave us a breather from Mel Gibson's verbal bazookas shot at Oksana Grigorieva. But today they were baaaaack with more bile and pestilence.
On the latest secret recording, Mel does nothing to dispute Oksana's claim that he hit her and the couple's baby, Lucia.
"You're acting as a crazy man right now," Oskana tells her baby daddy. "And you have been for many many months. And you hit me and you hit her whilst she was in my hands!"
Manic Mel responds: "You need a f-cking kick up the a-- for being a b-tch, c-nt, golddigging wh-re with a p-ssy son. And I want my child and no one will believe you.
What's increasingly apparent on the tapes -- beside Mel's general insanity -- is that he's got deep issues regarding male and female roles. Oksana offends his "maleness"; she needs to be his "woman." And he frequently uses his wealth to lord over her. "And I'm not giving you my house and you can rot! Unless you crawl back, suck my c-ck, and say you're sorry, in that order," he says on the latest audio. "You f--cking offend my fucking maleness, my masculinity, my being, my soul."
Transcript Five Of Mel's Mental Meltdown.
Can't Look Away: The Fourth Transcript Of Mel Gibson's Descent Into Madness.
More Mad Mel: Transcript Of Radar's Third Secret Mel Gibson Audio.
'You Should Just F-----g Smile and Bloooow Me': Transcript Two Of RadarOnline's Mel Gibson Crazy Tirade.
Here's the Full Transcript Of Mel Gibson's Sickening Rant Released By Radar.
Read the full post here.
FINALLY, THE JIG IS UP, LiLo.
By now you've been forced to trade in your ridiculous leggings for some eye-popping prison orange. So I've put together a few tips to help you survive your 90-day sentence.
1. Dye your hair brown. That white blonde you're rocking is going to clash wicked awful with the orange jumpsuit. And if you carry this off well -- who knows? -- you could spawn a whole new street style called Pokeywear.
Read the full post here.
WHOOPI GOLDBERG OPENED HERSELF UP TO SERIOUS RAZZING AFTER SHE had the audacity to defend Mel Gibson against charges that he's a racist.
The actor used the "N" word in his rant toward Oksana Grigorieva and last Monday Whoopi dismissed the clamor for his head on The View saying, "I know Mel, and I know he's not a racist. I have had a long friendship with Mel.
Read the full post here.
FATIGUE IS SETTING IN AND DON'T WE ALL WISH RADARONLINE would soon end their drip-drip-dripping of Mel Gibson's suicide poison? For crissakes, just end our misery in one final fell dose, please!
Okay, I'll speak for myself: my heart is wearier than it was before subjecting myself to Mad Mel's debasing language. And if weren't for my mild case of OCD and my need to be thorough, I'd discard this waste-less pastime. At least I tell myself this in lieu of whispering 'click ho.'
Surprisingly, if you listen very closely, on this fifth recording there's a sliver of silver lining for noncelebrities: Rich couples fight over money, too! And isn't that shocking at the same time affirming? You see? TMZ's right! They're just like us! Except with larger doses of delusion!
Without further ado, here's the fifth installment of Psycho: The Mel Gibson Story, compliments of RadarOnline and one Oksana Grigorieva.
Can't Look Away: The Fourth Transcript Of Mel Gibson's Descent Into Madness.
More Mad Mel: Transcript Of Radar's Third Secret Mel Gibson Audio.
'You Should Just F-----g Smile and Bloooow Me': Transcript Two Of RadarOnline's Mel Gibson Crazy Tirade.
Here's the Full Transcript Of Mel Gibson's Sickening Rant Released By Radar.
Read the full post here.
VIRTUAL RUBBERNECKERS CAN'T HELP BUT WATCH MEL GIBSON'S EMOTIONAL INNARDS SPILLED ALL OVER THE INTERNET HIGHWAY.
Shame on us, shame on me, but this is tragically compelling stuff and it's hard to look away.
We could spend the rest of our lives sifting through the remains of this shattered love story and still not know definitively what motivates these two people -- or, any two people really -- to love and hate.
Because I've started this fool's errand and I intend to finish it, here's RadarOnline fourth audio bombshell transcribed save for the first indecipherable phrase:
'You Should Just F-----g Smile and Bloooow Me': Transcript Two Of RadarOnline's Mel Gibson Crazy Tirade.
More Mad Mel: Transcript Of Radar's Third Secret Mel Gibson Audio.
Here's the Full Transcript Of Mel Gibson's Sickening Rant Released By Radar.
Getting Trippy On A Double Rainbow.
Read the full post here.
AREN'T YOU CURIOUS NOW ABOUT OKSANA GRIGORIEVA'S CAREER, OR "WHATEVER IT IS?"
The becoming Russian native was a tabloid cutout until I heard her voice on the audios she secretly recorded of Mad Mel. And how self-possessed and well-spoken is she? Pretty.
On the latest descent into horror, the subjects of Oksana's talent -- and music videos come up. So what to do but look her up on YouTube and the web?
As the couple tear into one another on the third tape released by RadarOnline, Mel insults Oksana's singing, telling her "that's how little I fucking think of your talent."
Read the full post here.
IN A CLASSIC CASE OF BEATING A DEAD HORSE -- IN THIS INSTANCE THE ABUSER IS MEL AND THE HORSE IS OKSANA -- RadarOnline releases yet another audio documenting the dysfunction between the star and his baby mama.
In comparison to the first two audios, this one's practically boring, with Mel's sins including calling his infant daughter's nanny a "wetback" and piling on Oksana his usual choice epithets: whore, cunt, bitch. His most stinging zinger here includes calling Oksana Grigorieva a "f----- mentally deprived idiot."
The mystery of why Oskana would tolerate such abuse is moot knowing that she was recording Mel for future posterity, i.e. perhaps evidence in any custody battle for her daughter Lucia.
Which brings me to Whoopi Goldberg's comments today on The View suggesting that Oksana must have had money on her mind when she recorded her crazy love. Seems like Whoopi hasn't paid too close attention to what the courts do in custody battles, which is essentially cut the kids down the middle and let the warring parents take a side. What sane mother would want some crazy motherfucker like Mel have custody? Only a recording like this would enable the courts see Mel's full on scary loony. That's just my take.
Anyhoo, here's the trascript of the third release from RadarOnline:
'You Should Just F-----g Smile and Bloooow Me': Transcript Two Of RadarOnline's Mel Gibson Crazy Tirade.
Here's the Full Transcript Of Mel Gibson's Sickening Rant Released By Radar.
Getting Trippy On A Double Rainbow.
Read the full post here.
HERE'S THE TRANSCRIPT OF RADARONLINE'S SECOND PORNOGRAPHIC RECORDING OF MEL GIBSON'S ABUSIVE AND MENANCING TIRADE TOWARD OKSANA GRIGORIEVA.
Who thought it was possible that Mel's sick display could be worse than that revealed in the first video released by Radar. But the second is worse, much worse, and reveals Mel insinuating that he'd kill Oksana. "I'll put in a fucking rose garden you cunt. You understand that?,'' Gibson says. "Because I'm capable of it."
The audio seems to capture Mel's violent reaction to Oskana's attempt to break away from him following his apparent assault on her that broke of her two teeth while she was holding their infant daughter. She tells him calmly throughout that he needs medication, that he's imbalanced.
"Because I'm saving my life and I'm saving daughter's life,"' Oskana tells Gibson, for the first time raising her voice. "That's what I'm doing. I don't give a damn about my music and I don't give a damn about you spending another penny. I'm saving her life." Moments later Gibson sneers at her with a mocking laugh.
Here's the transcript of the full eight minutes. Be forewarned that the last few minutes are hard to transcribe with 100 percent accuracy as the couple repeatedly talk over one another.
Here's the Full Transcript Of Mel Gibson's Sickening Rant Released By RadarOnline.
More Mad Mel: Transcript Of Radar's Third Secret Mel Gibson Audio.
Getting Trippy On A Double Rainbow.
Read the full post here.
GOODBYE WORLD CUP, WE HARDLY KNEW YOU.
Now that the world's celebration of football is over, I can't help feeling, sniff sniff, sentimental. I can't tell you a thing about the teams or any individual game -- you can read all about that here. But I caught the collective vibe that the world was sending, and it was nice that for once, America didn't dominate the field. For once, our hubris couldn't help us score.
The games forced Americans, or, I'll speak for myself -- me -- to broaden my insular world view.
Read the full post here.
MEL GIBSON'S POISONOUS SOUL IS ON FULL DISPLAY IN THE TWO MINUTE AUDIO RELEASED TODAY BY RADARONLINE.
After listening to the disease Mel spews at his baby mama Oksana Grigorieva, no misdeed seems out of the realm of possibility for the sociopathic Mad Mel.
He had a Hitler-loving father? Of course! He punches women? It's not stretch to think that he's hit every woman he's ever slept with.
The actor seems literally possessed as he rips into Oksana as his voice becomes increasingly rabid. He calls her breast implants "foreign bodies" and says "they look stupid, I'm telling you. It's just an appraisal. Keep 'em if you want. Look stupid. See if I give a fuck."
So far, Gibson's well-documented hatred has been aimed at women, blacks, Jews, and Vegas showgirls. Most of all, he's got to hate himself.
Radar released the exclusive audio Friday afternoon and it was later lifted by the website Gawker. RadarOnline's editor Dylan Howard said that any outlet publishing the exclusive audio had been served with a cease-and-desist order.
By late evening, word was out that Gibson had been dumped by William Morris Endeavor because he "used the n word."
Here's the audio where Mel snarls at Oksana that "you look like a fucking bitch in heat, and if you get raped by a pack of n-----s, it will be your fault."
Read the full post here.
THE THIN LINE BETWEEN LOVE AND HATE GOES 3-D IN THREE HIGH-PROFILE CASES IN THIS WEEK'S NEWS.
The Hollywood custody docudrama between Mel Gibson and ex-girlfriend Oksana Grigorieva continues to play out on the gossip pages. The couple are battling it out for custody of their infant daughter, Lucia. Last week secret tape recordings containing Mel's hateful rants toward Oksana leaked on the web, including one on which Gibson admits hitting the Russian singer.
"What kind of a man would hit a woman when she is holding a child in her hands, hitting her twice in the face?
Read the full post here.
IT'S TOUGH BEING A PROPHET IN YOUR OWN COUNTRY. Just ask Oprah or Paul the psychic octopus.
Goddamn German ingrates, threatening to eat the only octopus known to mankind to be able to predict outcomes, or specifically, the winner of six-out-of-six German World Cup games.
Here's a creature that humans didn't even know perceived football hegemony and he's accurately predicting wins!
And now that the Germans have been ousted by Spain, what do his bitter countrymammals want to do?
Cut off his head, chop off his tentacles, mix in a little soy and serve a miracle on a plate!
Read the full post here.
NICE JOB ON THAT JAIL SENTENCE, LOHAN. But in your pathetic haste to make more headlines you didn't stop to think of a few important things.
I know you're used to the posh, cushy Beverly Hills lifestyle, but suppose they don't have manicurists in LA prisons? And what if there are no pens with which to apply hidden messages to the prison guards on your acrylic fingertips? How, then, will you continue your campaign of innocence from behind bars?
Read the full post here.
BRITNEY'S BACK, BITCHES! Everybody's favorite pop tart graces the cover of the August Cosmopolitan. Or at least her head does, looking oversized and affixed to another person's body. Not because Britney doesn't have a good enough body -- she does. But because the photoshop job is horrifically bad.
Which brings me to Cosmo, Helen Gurly Brown's how-to-guide to stereotyping girls and life in general. Does Brit Brit adorning this tired mag mean she's already aging off the A-list? Come on, girl, make motherhood work for you the way Angelina does. Or does that require marrying up?
I am always glad to encounter like-minded commenters on the Internets, and I found no shortage of them at EW where the Brit cover was provoking spew. And I didn't even get passed the first page of comments!
"That is one ugly picture for a pretty pretty girl,'' writesBee. "Why does Cosmo like to disfigure its cover girls?
Read the full post here.
THE 3:56 MINUTE VIDEO SHOWS Lindsay Lohan explaining how she did everything required to fulfill the terms of her probation stemming from a 2007 DUI case. Her teary rationale came just minutes before she was sentenced to 90 days in the pokey for failing to attend alcohol education classes.
I can't even muster up the meh to launch a defense or attack against the starlet, but you'll find someone who agrees with whatever stance you're taking.
Read the full post here.
Because "death was very hard" for her to take, Jean Stevens simply ignored its grim realities when her husband, and then later, her twin sister died. After their burials, she had their embalmed bodies dug up and resumed life with them inside her house.
"Now, some people have a terrible feeling," Stevens told a reporter who paid her a visit at her "tumbledown" house. "They say, 'Why do you want to look at a dead person? Oh my gracious.' Well, I felt differently about death."
Read the full post here.
A BEST BUY EMPLOYEE IS LEARNING THAT IT'S DANGEROUS TO TICK OFF YOUR CORPORATE DADDY.
Have you seen the hilarious video above? It depicts a cartoon bear phone salesman becoming increasingly frustrated by a customer who won't even consider an EVO 4G over the iPhone 4.
"The monthly bill is cheaper,'' the sales bear tells the customer. "I don't care," she responds. "It fucking prints money,'' the salesman tries again. "I don't care." "It can grant up to three wishes even if one of those wishes is for an iPhone."
"I don't care."
And so it goes until the sales bear is ready to chop of his most precious body part. (Warning: the video is being called NSFW.)
Read the full post here.
MOLLY HAGERTY BETTER HOPE SHE'S GOT AL GORE'S SPERM SEALED UP IN A PLASTIC BAGGIE.
Hagerty, 54, is the masseuse who accuses the former Vice President of acting like a "sex-crazed poodle" and sexually assaulting her when she was summoned to his Portland, Ore. hotel for a late night massage.
That was in October 2006. But the details of Hagerty's so-called brush with the "big lummox" are only reach the public now. And if her account is true, well, "Call Me Al" Gore is just another leering politician with a sense of omnipotence.
But if Hagerty's account is false?
Read the full post here.
PROFESSED JESUS LOVER MEL GIBSON IS once again spreading his own virulent brand of Christian joy and and it's going to take more than a dozen Hail Marys to win our absolution.
The Catholic actor who once blamed Jews for all the world's wars has now been caught slandering blacks and using the "n" word.
Seems the actor-turned-director is a bullying prick behind closed doors whose terms of endearments include "whore" and "cunt." And thanks to the wonder of electronic surveillance, now the world knows for sure.
In conversations secretly taped by his baby momma, Oksana Grigorieva, Gibson spews venom at her.
"You're an embarrassment to me," the director of The Passion Of Christ tells the mother of his love child, Lucia.
You Should Just F-----g Smile And Bloooow Me": Transcript Two Of Radar's Audio Of Mel Gibson's Crazy Tirade.
Here's The Full Transcript Of Mel Gibson's Sickening Rant Released By RadarOnline.
Read the full post here.
THOSE CLAWS, THAT SNARL. Beware the fame monster!
Lady Gaga poses with a giant Polaroid of herself that the company presented to the MIT Museum. The photo becomes a part of the museum's Polaroid collection which includes 10,000 artifacts from the iconic company's history. The full collection is scheduled to go on display in 2013.
Gaga was named "creative director'' of Polaroid in January while Bobby Sager was appointed director yesterday.
"For 10 years, I haven't worked because I didn't find anything interesting enough," said Sager. "This collaboration with Lady Gaga is 'interesting' on steroids."
Read the full post here. IS IT TRUE? Is Larry King finally hanging up his suspenders and calling it a night?
Actually, I use the word "night" loosely here. With a guy his age, it's more like 4 p.m. But I digress.
Those are some mighty big shoulder pads to fill. Without him, who will ask the hard questions, like, "What's your favorite color?" Who will welcome the D-listers with such open arms as he has?
June 30, 2010
JUST IN TIME FOR JULY'S RELEASE OF SALT, ANGELINA JOLIE talks about life as mom to six kids and partner to the sexiest man alive in the upcoming Vanity Fair.
In exchange for the mag cover, Ang reveals character traits about the kids. And for once, she removes her superhero cape and admits that she's got her hands full with her brood and worries about having enough time for them in the future.
"It's easy when they're small and don't require much emotional support,'' she said.
Thirst-Inspiring: Angelina Jolie In Salt Trailer
Read the full post here.
THOSE MUFFLED CRIES EMANATING FROM AMERICA'S BEDROOMS THIS MORNING? Pubescent boys awaking to the news that fantasy conquest Megan Fox is officially off the market.
TMZ reports that the screen siren with the potty mouth made it official with longtime beau Brian Austin Green while vacationing in Hawaii. The couple met on the set of TV's Hope And Faith in 2004. "It was very hush hush.
Read the full post here.
IN A CITY WHERE GUNS HAVE BEEN BANISHED SINCE 1982, more than 80 people were reported shot in the last 10 days. And more than 200 have been killed so far this year.
That reality underscores the debate at the crux of gun control, which suffered a setback Monday when the U.S. Supreme Court effectively overturned Chicago's stringent handgun ban.
"Politicians are frustrated and they don't think of [the problem] logically," said Don Mastrianni, the owner of Illinois Gun Works, located just outside of Chicago. "They like to spout off about common sense. But where's the common sense when they write these regulations?
"Personally they have good intentions,'' he said.
Read the full post here.
THAT OSCAR IS ALIVE AT ALL BELIES THE OLD WIVES' TALE THAT BLACK CATS ARE UNLUCKY.
In fact, few felines of any color have ever been so blessed as the suburban London feline whose back paws were amputated in a farming accident.
The two-year-old "moggie" is lucky in several ways: he has owners who loved him so much they were willing to pay in excess of $3,000 for him to receive prosthetic paws and surgery.
And he benefited by proximity to the Eashing veterinarian who implanted the metal "pegs'' into his ankle bone.
"The real revolution," says veterinary "neuro-orthopaedic" surgeon Noel Fitzpatrick, is that Oscar's skin grew over the metal creating in essence "an extremely tight bone."
"We had to do a lot of soul-searching," Kate Nolan, the cat's owner, said on Fitzpatrick's website, "and our main concern has always been whether this operation would be in Oscar's best interests and would give him a better quality of life."
Read the full post here.
KATE GOSSELIN WAS GRASPING FOR AIR AFTER HER messy divorce, a house full of kids, a so-so samba with Dancing with the Stars, and the sudden death of her family reality show.
The crusty mommy needed change, a little pick-me-up.
So what does she do? Get a new haircut that will be criticized and analyzed by every cockamame two-bit blogger. No.
Worse: a Botox treatment that makes her look like Mr. Spock's wife.
US magazine reports that Kate was photographed on Monday showing noticeably smoother skin and
spiked eyebrows. Comparing pictures of the new Kate to the old Kate, Dr. Michael Olding of George Washington University's division of plastic surgery, concluded:
Read the full post here.
FAME MONSTER LADY GAGA falls to her knees in worship of her paparazzi in London. Because she knows that without them she'd be just a third-place winner in a talent contest.
Going Gaga For The Fame Monster: Lady G on Etsy
Read the full post here.
LADY GAGA IS A FRAUD!
That ain't her butt and those aren't her legs that she's wielding like weapons on the cover of the Rolling Stone. And never you mind the machine guns that she's cozying up to.
While bloggers frequently spank fashion magazines for photoshopping models, that same beautifying's going on here.
Gah's legs appear longer and less muscular than they look in recent pics of her strutting in ripped leggings to a visit to the New York Mets, where she sat in Jerry Seinfeld's box. Not that there's anything wrong with that.
Her little monsters are smart enough to know the real deal.
"Whatever artist was commissioned to Photoshop her butt needs to be fired," snipes LesleyBurt at the fansite Gaga Daily. "We should submit this to the Photoshop Fail blog. Sooooo horribly done, ew."
Read the full post here.
TEEN SENSATION JUSTIN BIEBER LIVES!
Or maybe not. Maybe he's lying dead in a gutter in Atlanta and his body just hasn't been found.
What we can categorically report is that the heart throb didn't die yesterday in Toronto from a suspected cocaine overdose as has been reported.
Rumors zipped through the Internets late last night that the 16-year-old Baby singer was found passed out in an Ontario home and was later declared dead at a Toronto hospital.
A counterfeit website mimicking Fox News claimed that "police reports indicate that illegal drugs, namely cocaine, may be factors in the young singer's condition."
But that was news to Toronto police "Constable Chan" who was on duty early this morning. He said he had received no such information about Bieber's death, and that "if anything big happens in Toronto, the Duty Desk gets notified." Personnel from the Toronto East General Hospital also poured water on the claims.
Good news, Justin! You get to live until the next rumor rockets 'round the web.
IT MAY NOT BE TODAY OR EVEN NEXT YEAR, but the day's coming when Abby Sunderland sobs aloud wondering if her parents loved her or notoriety more.
On Friday, hours after their daughter was discovered alive on her disabled 40-foot boat in the Indian Ocean, Laurence and Marianne Sunderland "offered no apologies” for allowing their 16-year-old daughter to attempt to sail around the world.
"We believe it's a parent's right to decide what their kids are capable of and for our family, we felt it was a good choice for Abby," said Marianne Sunderland.
Dad Laurence told reporters, "If people are looking at age, they're looking at the wrong thing here.
Read the full post here.
THIS MORNING'S DISH: NEWS, TAPAS STYLE.
Suspected sociopath Dutchman Joran Van der Sloot claims to know the location of Natalie Holloway's body, but some think the 22-year-old suspected serial murderer is just playing more head games to get back to safer ground in Aruba. In his latest recounting of Natalie's death, Van der Sloot told investigators that the Alabama girl died after falling and that his father helped him bury her body. Recent stories implicate Va der Sloot in the Netherlands seedy sex trade.
Read the full post here.
SO WHO'S THE MYSTERY MAN ON DANIELLE STAUB'S HOMEGROWN VIDEO?
Steve Zalewski, the ex beau of New Jersey's most reviled housewife, denies that he's the man on the homemade movie due out June 14th. Steve says the home porn he shot shows Danielle servicing him orally. He threatened to release the tape last year but Danielle got a temporary injunction from the court.
I reported last month seeing the tape depicting Danielle's pierced muff riding her mystery partner in a variety of positions. And though the voice surely sounded like Steve's to me, I'll admit that when somebody's throwing pussy at you and you're in the throes of lust, our growls and moans can sound alike.
Read the full post here.
GIZMODO HAS BEEN BANISHED FROM THE PARTY AND NO ONE IS SURPRISED.
When the expected ballyhooed unveiling of the 4G iPhone takes place at Apple's Worldwide Developers Conference keynote on Monday, the blog that let that electronic cat out of the bag won't have a writer in attendance.
Nick Denton's tech site reports that Apple has ignored its request to attend the meeting, touted as "the premier technical conference for developers innovating with Apple technologies." Consider it punishment for Gizmodo prematurely ejaculating all over Steve Jobs' plan for a controlled release of his latest prize.
Read the full post here.
WE PREDICT A BUSY DAY FOR DR. DREW TODAY AS WAGS PONDER THE MEANING OF KATY PERRY'S TWEETED BIRTHDAY MISSIVE TO HER BEAU RUSSELL BRAND.
Katy photoshopped her face on Russell's body on the current Rolling Stone cover.
"In honor of @rustyrockets birthday; film release! MY Rolling Stone Cover!," she exclaimed. But the bizarre photo could just as easily be a Rorschach test on the subliminal urges of the girl rocker.
Russell, starring in the just released Get Him To The Greeks, turned 35 June on 4th. The daffy twosome are engaged to become one later this year.
We could spend all day fingering through the DSM-IV for clues as to what disorder Katy's suffering. But who has time? And what would that reveal about me? Thus, we'll keep this pointless pastime brief.
Here, for your consideration, a few diagnoses:
Read the full post here.
THE PICTURES ARE SICKENING and provoke revulsion, rage and hopelessness in any decent human being who sees them.
Associated Press photographer Charlie Riedel took these photos of oil-sludged birds along East Grand Terre Island on the Louisiana coast. You can see the misery in the birds' eyes, and sometimes death approaching.
Read the full post here.
D.H. LAWRENCE COULDN'T IMAGINE RAPTURE MORE TORRID THAN THAT BETWEEN Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton.
Obsession, possession, consumption -- Liz & Dick thrilled for it all. And in its latest issue, Vanity Fair excerpts letters written to Liz by Richard Burton are included in the new book, Furious Love: Elizabeth Taylor, Richard Burton, and the Marriage of the Century written by Sam Kashner and Nancy Schoenberger.
The movie stars, both married to others when they became involved while working on Cleopatra, soon after divorced their respective spouses.
Read the full post here.
WANTED: HOT, YOUNG DUMB THING WITH A PENCHANT FOR POTTY MOUTH. NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY. MUST BE WILLING TO WORK UNDER EXTREME CONDITIONS.
Transformers' director Michael Bay has found his girl!
British model Rosie Huntington-Whiteley will play Shia Labeouf's love
interest in Transformers 3. The British model reportedly replaces Megan Fox in the action boobs and bombs movie franchise.
As soon as word was out that Megan had "quit" the gig, wags began speculating on her replacement and word was that Bay was considering several models. Other names that showed up on his "potential" included Miranda Kerr and Bar Rafaeli.
But for Bay, everything came up Rosie.
Outfoxed: Megan Fox Scrambles To Set Record Straight On Who Nixed Transformers Role.
Megan Fox's 10 Most Fearsome Quotes.
Megan Fox Gets Stupid, Proves She's No Angelina.
Read the full post here.
POOR VANILLA GORILLA. His cheatin' heart is the fault of a thug daddy who beat and humiliated him as a kid.
Of course, daddy Larry James's denies those stories and is telling folks he "would have died" before hurting his children. Calls Jesse "the apple of my eye."
"I think he made these allegations because he's told so many lies for so many years about his childhood," James professed to Radaronline, and his ex-wife is backing him up. It's too bad for him that now his daughter says Jesse's claims are true.
In his first interview since being outed as a serial cheater and Nazi poser, the Monster TV star claimed his father broke his arm and generally scared the eff out of him when he was a kid.
Read the full post here.
SO NOW WE KNOW: THE COMMONER WHO GOT KICKED OUT OF THE PALACE HAS TO SELL HER SOUVENIRS.
There's no excusing Princess Sarah Ferguson for selling access to Prince Andrew for a hefty pile of dosh. But that'll happen when you give a commoner taste of royal privilege, then banish her with a paltry $20,000 divorce settlement.
A British tabloid recorded the Duchess of Debt soliciting $723,000 from an undercover reporter who pretended he wanted favor from the Prince.
Prince Andrew is Britain's UK's Special Representative for International Trade and Investment.
Read the full post here.
SEMEN WHISPERER PEREZ HILTON is getting desperate.
With his name being bandied about as a possible replacement for Simon Cowell, and with Simon himself blowing back props to him, the queen of mean says he'd replace the exiting judge for free.
"I've shamelessly been campaigning for the job," Perez tells MTV news. "And I am adamant and I believe I would do a great job. Plus -- I'm not even joking, I would work for free the first season. After that, then we can talk about a fair paycheck."
Perez won't need the jack if he sells his heavily trafficked internet real estate. He's been offered $20 million for Hollywood's most despised blog.
A collective gurgle went up over at MTV.com at the idea of Perez replacing Simon.
Read Who Will Replace Simon: Speculation Runs From Ridiculous To Ingenious
Read Lee & Crystal Worthy Opponents In Idol Final.
Read the full post here.
CONSPIRACY THEORISTS (i.e. me) are speculating about the curious timing of the just-released topless snaps of the radioactively hot Mega Fox.
Megan's publicly pouting over the pics, taken while she played an angelic circus freak in Passion Play with Mickey Rourke. But isn't their appearance the perfect ruse to distract from the brouhaha over who quit whom -- Megan or the Hitleresque director Michael Bay?
"It was her decision not to return,'' the starlet's mouthpiece told People. "She wishes the franchise the best."
Read the full post here.
LIKE EVERY OTHER GAME THAT INVOLVES BIG MONEY AND GOVERNMENT, THE OIL GAME IS RIGGED.
No matter what industry we point to, the circle of influence is closed. It begins with investors pursuing wealth, snares academics and businessmen profiting off special knowledge, then proceeds to government officials perpetuating their individual power and the industrial complex.
There is no place at the table for independent watchdogs, the "public interest" or a population scrambling to pay bills or buy toys for which demand has been created.
Seduced by power, public officials are forced to chase donations for million-dollar re-election campaigns, the bulk of which comes from monied "special interests" who pay to play.
And who profits directly?
Read the full post here.
EW HAS A PIECE EXPLORING THE PRICETAG of celebrity mistressdom, which so far has bagged only a few couple hundred grand for most of these objects of sex obsessions.
That's more than these ladies (cough, cough) would get collecting dollar tips from dirty hands while pole dancing at strip clubs.
But if the reports are true that serial husband-stealer Rachel Uchitel pocketed $10 million (minus the Gloria Allred's lawyer fees), then the proof's in the putang that hos who represent themselves have fools as agents.
Read the full post here.
RESERVE ONE IN MY NAME, PLEASE?
Digitimes says 24 million 4G iPhones will be shipped in 2010 starting next month. The device will reportedly be officially unveiled June 7th at Apple's Worldwide Developers Conference.
The existence of Apple's next generation iPhone was revealed when some sorry beer-swilling engineer lost a prototype in a California bar and another schmo found it and sold it for $5,000 to Gizmodo.
The irreverent tech blog, part of the Gawker chain, then raped that machine, photographed the assault and laid it out bare on the web. This, despite calls from the grand wizard himself, Steve Jobs, trying to get his baby back.
Digitimes reports the updated device seeks to address battery issues that hampered appeal of earlier generations, and will incorporate a 960×640 resolution.
Read the full post here.
ONE OF THE GRANDADDIES OF HEAVY METAL, RONNIE JAMES DIO, DIED today after a six-month battle with stomach cancer. He was 67 and had recently undergone his seventh bout of chemotherapy .
The dark conscience of the metal science, Dio was well known for flashing the devil horns in concert, something he said he picked up from his Italian grandmother who used to do it ward off evil spirits, according to Wikipedia.
Read the full post here.
EVERYBODY'S TALKING ABOUT HOW IT'S ALL "Miley and Justin…sitting in a tree…"
Oh please. She had sushi with a fellow little underaged tater tot. That's all this is. Well, maybe they'll swap some hair tips too. But that's it, really. And Justin's an appropriate playmate for a 17-year-old, unlike the 44-year-old Adam Shankman whom she gifted with a lap dance last summer.
Read the full post here.
O M G, NOT ANOTHER ONE.
What is it with this renewing of the vows? What does it all mean? Am I supposed to do it now?
It's must be catching.
On April 30, those crazy kids Mimi and Nick renewed their vows for a third time.
And just this past weekend, Heidi Klum and Seal did it for a sixth time. "It's our time -- a lovely family time," Klum explained to Redbook. "It's about remembering this moment of love we gave to each other and reinforcing it."
Thwarting rumors of impending divorce, Tori Spelling and husband Dean McDermott also recoupled Saturday in a private Beverly Hills ceremony. Tori wore white and kissed her husband "passionately" after the ceremony.
Read the full post here.
YOU KNOW THAT SLUT IN HIGH SCHOOL WHO DIDN'T GIVE A TWIT what all the good girls said behind her back?
The one who traded rides on the joy stick with the boy who got the brand new Jeep for his 16th birthday? And then dumped him when the boy from the next town over showed up in the BMW?
She grew up to be Rachel Uchitel.
Seems Tiger's No. 1 ho -- the one he was dreaming of when he slammed into a fire hydrant while hopped up on Ambien and Vicodin late Thanksgiving night -- had traded up when she met Ti.
Radaronline's published text messages that it says are between Uchitel and married Bones star David Boreanaz when the actor's wife was only days away from giving birth to the couple's second child.
Read Tiger Woods Falls Prey To The Chase For Magic Pussy.
Read the full post here.
Poor Courtney Love. The hole in her heart was like a sieve yesterday as she spilled boy tips and mommy dearest denials to estranged daughter Frances Bean on Twitter.
Pour Courtney. Because as much as she blathers on about how she loves and misses Frances, and how that girl should never, ever settle for a beta boy, she's made such a fucking mess of her life that you grant her an audience at your own peril.
Thus, I've put you notice that what follows are the rantings of a sad, confused, pathetic, deluded, miseducated, desperately needy mind.
Continue reading "Courtney Love Twitters Dating Tips & Legal Plea to Estranged Daughter" »
Read the full post here.
LEGENDARY SINGER LENA HORNE, WHO BROKE COLOR BARRIERS BOTH ON AND OFF SCREEN, DIED YESTERDAY AT AGE 92 IN NEW YORK.
Horne, who began singing at the Cotton Club in Harlem at age 16, was the "radiantly beautiful sepia girl" who became the first African American performer to sign a multiyear contract with a major Hollywood studio. But in an age when Jim Crow laws dominated, Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer mismanaged her talents, plopping per performances into movies in which she had no part of the storyline.
Read the full post here.
SO, WAIT. AM I HEARING THIS RIGHT?
That Bret "Love The Dirty Ladies Til I Die" Michaels is contemplating marriage to Kristi Gibson, the mother of his children? So does this mean that his doctors might actually have FIXED his brain, or…?
"As painful as this experience has been, I was given a second chance, right?,'' Michaels said. "I don't want to sit around every night worrying this is going to happen again. What I want to do is make a positive bucket list and say, 'I'm just gonna go for it.'
"There's just so much more I want to do and experience," he continued. "[Getting married], for sure, is something I have never done. Kristi's such a great person. We'll see if that happens. But yes, that may be one of the big things on the list."
Well, I guess this makes some sense. I mean, when all your interactions with women revolve around booze, hair-pulling, sharing greasy eyeliner, crying jags, more booze, stripper poles, implant popping and still more booze, the whole "wild rocker" thing is likely to get the best of you.
Read the full post here.
THE LEGAL UNTANGLING REMAINS, BUT ELIN NORDEGREN AND SANDRA BULLOCK are slowly leaving their tattered marriages behind while finding solace with their wee ones.
Elin's been photographed in her native Sweden jogging without her wedding ring, which she discarded shortly after Tiger's sexual peccadilloes became public. Her two children, Sam and Charlie, are reportedly with her and the rehabbing of her new house is proceeding at a furious pace.
Though the paperwork hasn't been filed, talk is picking up pace that a divorce is inevitable and imminent. Is Elin just biding her time due to contractual obligations?
Read the full post here.
A STRING OF RECENT SUICIDES AMONG THE WORLD'S SUPERMODELS IS PROVING that good looks, money and the admiration of others is not enough to make you happy.
Top male model Ambrose Olsen hung himself Thursday, April 22, according to the blog Modelwhispers. Olsen, 24, had appeared in print ads for design heavy hitters including Hugo Boss, Burberry, Louis Vuitton, and Armani Exchange.
That same day, Colombian supermodel and television presenter Lina Marulanda jumped off her 6th floor balcony and fell to her death.
In November of 2009, 20-year-old South Korean model Daul Kim was found hanged in her Paris apartment.
Read the full post here.
HERE'S THE THING ABOUT HALLE BERRY'S BREAKUP WITH Gabriel What's His Butt:
I can't feel sorry for her. Even with a dud like Catwoman under her belt. Because the fact is, this is old hat for her. And isn't she lucky that, as one of the Lucky Straights, she gets the chance to fuck up marriage -- though technically THIS time she wasn't married -- over and over again?
I can't really give two shits about celebrity breakups because they make up/break up every ten minutes and it's getting old. Also, there are bigger issues around marriage and relationships that should have our attention, don't you think?
Read the full post here.
ANY SECOND NOW, WE'LL HEAR DINA LOHAN exclaiming that everybody's making a big deal out of Lindsay putting a gun to her mouth and then tweeting the picture.
"She's just a kid!," she'll wail. "She's under a lot of pressure! Leave her alone!"
To which somebody, anybody, should tell her to fucking wake up, get a grip. That she's displaying the most blatant example of enabling that Hollywood's seen this ratings season.
Read the full post here.
SANDRA BULLOCKGETS A HOLLYWOOD ENDING TO HER MARITAL DRAMA.
After two months of living in secret, the actress reveals to People that she's adoping a baby -- and ending her tulmutuous marriage to Nazi sympathizer Jesse James.
After news that her husband had a series of affairs with tattooed tricks, the Oscar-winning actress went in hiding. Now she emerges with a brand new baby boy, Louis Bardo Bullock, named after jazz musician Louis Armstrong.
Talking like a proud mama Sandra told the mag, "You wake up, you feed, you burp, you play, you do laundry ...I'm still in that stage where I'm just amazed with him and at life."
People also posted Jesse's reaction to the news: "The decision to let my wife end our marriage, and continue the adoption of Louis on her own, has been the hardest.
Read the full post here.
THE BAD NEWS IS THAT BRET MICHAELS HAD A BRAIN HEMORRHAGE. THE GOOD: it wasn't from syphilis.
No, it's not from a bus accident or a stripper pole impalement.
It's not a broken heart from a rose with a thorn.
It's not anything he deserved.
Read the full post here.
HERE'S CHRISTINA AGUILERA FEIGNING EMPATHY ABOUT SOMEBODY ELSE'S WORLD during an interview to promote her latest project Bionic.
She's parroting her prepared lines, something about stepping into somebody's world, and seeing what they and their music are all about. Then somebody coughs softly in the background. Which apparently is not allowed in Christina's world.
"Ahh. Coughing during my interview, really?," she sniffs, then cackles. "Shoot him!"
And then just like that she resumes her self-indulgent patter.
"I want to step into their world and then combine that with my sound and my vision for the record. And it was magic, it was pure magic."
Via Gawker.
IS LINDSAY LOHAN WASHED UP AT 23? Or maybe instead of work she just produces her own daily drama?
Today's melodramedy? Wags report that Lilo tossed a drink on ex-lover Sam Ronson at LaLaLand's Trousdale last night, which left the fading star swearing off clubbing later on Twitter. "Last night -- never again -- believe it or not she's done with the club scene i've learned my lesson-sometime's it just takes a glimpse of reality."
Just days ago, the Twittering starlet was dropped from the movie The Other Side shortly after despised daddy Michael Lohan brought police to "to intervene" at her apartment. Seems daddy was worried that big sis was corrupting 16-year-old sister, Ali.
Read the full post here.
THE INTERNET IS AN ADDICTIVE SINKHOLE THAT USERS INCREASINGLY SUBSTITUTE for relationships, television and other pastimes, suggests a study by the University of Maryland.
Though reports on the research were spare in specifics, the study found that students displayed classic signs of withdrawal -- craving and anxiety -- after foregoing the use of all new media for 24 hours.
"The dependency is sickening," one student allegedly said.
Read the full post here.
LARRY KING'S FREAKY, KATE GOSSELIN IS WEEPY, Charlie Sheen is off his rockin' detox and Kate Hudson has new bffs -- "breast friends forever." Admit it: isn't life boring without the wags?
The gossip hounds are still baying over claims that CNN's suspendered talker is a "freak" in bed. That's according to confessed adulterer and little league coach Hector Penate who got tangled in his own tryst with Larry's wife, Shawn Southwick. The ball boy fell into bed with Mrs. King in 2007 two weeks after they met. Penate coached King's two young sons in baseball. But, according to Penate, King "didn't even care because he was so in love" with Shawn's wife Shannon.
Read the full post here.
WHEN ALL THAT'S LEFT OF HER IS A PRETTY CORPSE, NAOMI CAMPBELL'S SOUL WILL DEFINITELY NOT FLOAT HEAVENWARD.
The notoriously hotheaded model got punchy today with ABC's cameras when asked about a "blood diamond" that she was allegedly gifted by henchmen for the former Liberian President Charles Taylor, according to the New York Post.
Campbell stormed out of a chair while being interviewed and smashed a camera being held by a producer as she fled.
Taylor will be tried in the Hague for war crimes during what the Post called a "diamond-fueled campaign of terror over the Liberian border in Sierra Leone."
SAFE ACROSS THE THE ATLANTIC, THE NATURAL DISASTER WREAKING HAVOC in Europe's skies seems like a million miles away.
Iceland's Eyjafjallajökull (ay-yah-FYAH'-plah-yer-kuh-duhl) volcano continues to spew ash, shooting plumes as high as six miles in the sky, and grounding airlines in the largest air traffic shutdown since World War II. Millions of travelers continue to be stranded across the globe.
The volcano erupted on April 14th, and as of April 18th, 63,000 flights had been cancelled.
The eruption has also heaped opportunity on photojournalists who have snapped spectacular pictures of ash plumes over Iceland. But pictures from the ground prove scarier.
Above, dairy farmer Berglind Hilmarsdottir wears a gas mask as he travails to find his missing cattle. The Associated Press reveals the harrowing scene Saturday in Nupur, Iceland.
KATHY GRIFFIN IS BRINGING AWARENESS TO CERVICAL CANCER by getting a pap smear live on her show My Life on the D-List.
This is not a joke. I don't know what is more shocking: the funny lady getting the papsmear by the pool, live on TV -- or seeing her bikinied body with ribs sticking out and a hint of her vajazzled vajajay below the bikini line. "Tell cancer to SUCK IT!," Kathy heralded on Twitter.
Read Haters, Why You Gotta Begrudge A Girl's Vajazzle?
Read The Vajazzling Kathy Griffin Overshares For A Good Cause.
Read the full post here.
THE SEISMIC WAVES buckling terra firma around the globe are also upending Hollywood couples.
Larry King has filed for his 8th divorce from his 7th wife -- he married wife no. three two times. The rumored reason: the 76-year-old talker was shagging his sister-in-law. Both he and Shawn Southwick, 50, filled competing papers Wednesday, and though gossips reported yesterday that the breakup may be on hold, Larry's lawyer told People that the split is "proceeding." If it goes through, Shawn will be entitled to half of Larry's reported $144 million fortune. For Larry's sake I hope the couple kiss and make up; I'm not sure he has the strength to go through another wedding, divorce and more babies. At 76 years, Larry, isn't it time to retire?
And In the category of "that was fast," Mel Gibson and his baby momma Oksana Grigorieva have quit their two-year relationship.
Read the full post here.
IN WHAT CAN ONLY BE CALLED A BRILLIANTLY EXECUTED counterintuitive ad campaign, everybody's favorite reformed Pop Tart has released pics depicting her "before" and "after" the magic of Photoshop.
The snaps of Britney Spears wearing a pink polka-dotted bathing suit were taken during a shoot for Candies and have already flooded the web. They first showed up on the U.K.'s Daily Mail, which claims Brit "allowed" the pre-airbrushed images to be used "ALONGSIDE" (their capitalization) the altered ones so people could see the difference.
And therein lies its brilliance: it allows Brit and Candies to have its cake -- Brit showing flesh in a pink-heavy campaign to appeal to girlies -- all the while eating it too -- being heralded as "courageous" for showing cottage cheesy thighs, buxom rump and bruised legs.
Read the full post here.
LORDY, LORDY, IS LADY GAH SENDING MIXED MESSAGES.
In a public appearance in support of Mac's Viva Glam Campaign, the living 3D cartoon superhero sent word to all her little monsters that it's okay to be chaste.
"I can't believe I'm saying this -- don't have sex,'' she reportedly uttered. "I'm single right now and I've chosen to be single because I don't have the time to get to know anybody. So it's OK not to have sex, it's OK to get to know people. I'm celibate, celibacy's fine."
If the subject weren't so serious, we'd surely point out hard it'd be for any suitor to find his/her way through the feathers, straps, chains and leather with which she adorns herself. But it's real news when pop's reigning boundary breaker preaches sexual control, even if the announcement will surely feed frenzied speculation over her alleged hermaphroditism.
Read the full post here.
AS TIGER WOODS RETURNS TO GOLF, NEWS about his sexcapades continue to dribble out. Another girl's come forward, this one the daughter of a neighbor whom he has known since he was 14. Raychel Coudriet, now 22, apparently got her panties in a twist when the news first broke about Tiger's prowling. "I felt used and violated, like I meant nothing to him but a night of casual sex," Raychel reportedly said. "I wanted to dig a hole, crawl in and die." Oh, shut up. Nobody cares anymore about how many women Tiger slept with. We lost count at…10.
While Ti's proving he's still master of his domain -- at least at the Masters -- his seedy pastimes were literally casting a shadow over his game. A plane flew over Augusta National with a banner that read: "TIGER: DID YOU MEAN BOOTYISM?," a jab at Woods' alleged return to his Buddhist faith, which he said he'd "drifted away" from during the past years. So far at the Masters, though, it looks like prayers to Booty are paying off for the errant husband and playboy.
Read the full post here.
TO THOSE UNSCHOOLED IN THE EUPHEMISMS OF WAR, there is no dispute that the Iraqi men gunned down by Crazyhorse One-Eight of the U.S. Military were murdered.
Armed with no weapons visible at least to the untrained eye, and paying no attention to an Apache helicopter flying overhead, the men are relaxed as they gather on a clear Bagdad day in an area where there had been exchanges between the U.S. military and Iraqi insurgents earlier in the day. Two Reuters journalists, one carrying a long-lensed camera, walks among them.
Up in the sky, two military men saw something entirely different: Armed enemy combatants. They report to commanding officers seeing "five to six individuals with AK-47s" and request permission to "engage." Permission granted.
"Just fuckin', once you get on 'em, just open 'em up,'' says one American fighter. Bullets from a 30 millimeter cannon fire rip through the air. Within minutes, the human targets are dead. "Oh yeah, look at them dead bastards," says the shooter. One of the injured tries to drag himself away. Minutes later, a van pulls up, a man gets out and tries to help the injured man inside.
Read the full post here.
DON'T YOU LOVE THE FORMER TATTLE-TELLING BODYGUARDS OF A-LIST CELEBRITIES?
We've all seen the wondrous Angelina Jolie performing charitable work or parading her faux merry brood before the paps. And after keeping twins Vivienne and Knox under wraps for nearly two years, Ang is putting out her own Good Morning Italy by posing on hotel balconies, riding in gondolas and taking strolls with her beauteous family as she makes a flick in Venice.
But don't delude yourself into thinking you're seeing the real Angelina as a former bodyguard spills to InTouch what she's really like when the cameras aren't around.
"Angelina has a public and a private persona,'' the tattler reveals."In my opinion, the real Angelina is self-centered and a control freak. She has no patience at all. She doesn't do things out of the kindness of her heart. And she's totally psycho…she screams and yells a lot, then walks away.''
Read the full post here.
IT TAKES HERCULEAN EFFORT TO TRUST AGAIN after gaining glimpse into a duplicitious soul. And so the day after Tiger Woods' mea culpa conference, there remains the question of just how much he meant of what he said.
The greastest golfer on earth took center ring Monday and led a near-perfect pitch confessional press conference, coming off as an assiduous practitioner of the 12 steps.
He once again admitted his transgressions, apologized for complicating the lives of other golfers, told us that he's returned to prayer through meditation, and reminded us that his journey to recovery from the unnamed elephant in the room is an unending process.
Read the full post here.
JESSE JAMES FLEES REHAB AFTER REPORTS SURFACE THAT MOVING TRUCKS WERE SPOTTED at the Seal Beach, Ca. house he once shared with Sandra Bullock who is assuredly seeking divorce from the cheating monster. "She is over him," a friend tells US Weekly. With evidence mounting that Sandra will no longer be Jesse's girl, the reality TV badboy's lawyer is pleading his case. "He's a broken man,'' Attorney Joe Yanny tells TMZ. "The single most important thing to Mr. James and the children is that the marriage somehow survive." Shouldn't he have thought of that before he threw his monkey wrench around?
Madonna sets up her 13-year-old daughter Lola with her own Macy clothing line. The "Material Girl" is purportedly designed by Lola who gets her inspiration from dance classes, her favorite rock bands and, um, aging rock stars? Madonna coos about Lola's sense of style but she wishes she would "dress more conservatively." Spoken like a true mum. Meanwhile, the original Material Girl parties in London with her 23-year-old boy toy Jesus Luz in tow. Heel, Jesus!
Read the full post here.
KIM ZOLCIAK is putting distance between herself and rumors that she's swinging both ways. The make-pretend housewife from Atlanta's Housewives wants the world know that she is not a lezbo and that she is certainly not muff chomping DJ Tracy Young, the same DJ who produced a remix of her Tardy For The Party .
"We were intimate -- but just once," Kim tells Perez. "I was on a break from Big Poppa. But I'm not into girls."
Read the full post here.
"ONLY I WOULD GET PUSHED INTO A LARGE, SHARP PLANT BY CRAZY PAPARAZZI!!! I need to start wearing more flats."
Lindsay Lohan Twittered to the world in an effort to seek sympathy for her recent consecutive falls and powder-in-shoes faux pas.
Poor Lilo's been ridiculed in the press for her recent mishaps and George Lopez insinuated the powder was coke.
That made Lindsay puffin' mad. She slammed the comedian on Twitter, then George did was any selfpromoting talkshow host would do: He invited her on his show. (Latest word: she's accepted.)
And all this drama over high-heeled shoes, the quintessential starlet's accessory!
In Lindsay's defense, no other fashion accessory has caused women more pain and suffering. But falling from six inches doesn't explain the fading star's recent out-of-control behavior which even led L.A.'s finest to consider seeking a psychological evaluation of her.
People close to LL are afraid for her life. Even her father held a news conference and blamed his divorce for his daughter's disturbing behavior.
But there is some good news: Lilo was spotted wearing ballet flats in L.A. two days ago. That's a step in the right direction. Now if she would only take it easy with the powder and the drinks…
Madi S. is mom to two kids and three cats. She loves pop culture news, movies, fashion, travel, reading and observing the world.
AS MORE SORDIDNESS IS REVEALED ABOUT TIGER WOODS IN THE new issue of Vanity Fair, less titillating but unflattering details emerge that paint him as a cheapskate.
In the article written by contributing editor Mark Seal, ex-mistresses Mindy Lawton and Jamie Jungers paint Woods as a tightwad. Lawton said the only thing Tiger ever purchased her was a Subway chicken wrap sandwich. And Jungers admits that she broke off the affair because Tiger refused to help when she was in financial trouble.
That sentiment was echoed in a December interview I had with Peter J. Drake, who also used to work at the Perkins' restaurant where Tiger frequently dined with his wife Elin. "He always made it a point to say hi to her and bye to" Mindy, said Drake, 30, who described himself as very close friend of Lawton's.
Read the full post here.
LINDSAY LOHAN HAS HIT ROCK BOTTOM, literally.
In just a few short weeks, she was photographed falling face forward into a cactus, denied entry to a Victoria's Secret party, and got dumped from her charity gig on behalf of India for tweeting about saving 40 children in one afternoon. Even L.A.'s finest are reportedly considering committing against her will.
What's next for this unemployed former child star? White power coming out from her shoes. Of course all the wags think it's a perfect metaphor for her rumored coke-tinged life.
The Jesse James scandal continues to unfold.
Read the full post here.
IT'S TIME TO SPOTLIGHT ATTORNEY GLORIA ALLRED, famed justice seeker who's righting wrongs and wronging rights for aggrieved cheating "other" women everywhere.
Says Allred: "I take fire, and I give fire -- because I'm not a philosopher; I'm a warrior."
Don't hold it against her that three recent clients are the mistresses of Tiger Woods and Jesse James, outlaws in the state of matrimony. 'Cause even deceitful fameballs are entitled to legal representation under our beloved Bill of Rights, at least until the current Supreme Court finds a way to void it.
Read the full post here.
SOMEBODY SOMEWHERE ONCE SANG A SONG SAYING WE DON'T NEED ANOTHER HERO, but that is so not true! We need all of them we can get.
And picking up the slack is Hayden Panettiere, who plays a hero not only on TV but in real life.
The 20-year-old looker who stars in the deliberately shamltzy series Heroes could spend her free time hitting L.A.'s nightclubs or New York's fashion shows. But does she? Nooo!
Rather, she devotes herself to trying to avert the slaughter of whales and dolphins by Japanese fishermen.
Two years ago, the actress was attacked as she tried to prevent the slaughter of dolphins along the coast of Taiji, Japan.
Read the full post here.
SO NOW THE WORLD KNOWS THE TROUBLE THAT IS JESSE JAMES.
Already four women have stepped forward claiming affairs with the self- proclaimed "Vanilla Gorilla," an ex-employee says he sexually harassed her, he's clashed with the paparazzi and has been purportedly offered $500,000 to pose for Playgirl.
And the saddest truth? He's more famous than ever before.
Psychologists everywhere have been answering the question of "why men cheat"? Here's my question: why bother getting married in the first place?
Read the full post here.
OUTLAW JESSE JAMES CAUGHT THE CHEATING SYNDROME.
Now the hole he dug for himself becomes a chasm. Like a déjà vu of the past months' headlines about multi-cheater Tiger Woods, more women are coming forward claiming having they slept with the married biker.
James' ex-wife Janine Lindemulder is spilling more details about their time together, and how she caught him when he sent a text message intended for another woman.
Janine, heavily tattooed just like James' playmate Michelle "Bombshell" McGee, says she feels sorry for Sandra for being fooled all these years.
Janine says that everybody around Jesse knew of his cheatin' ways.
Read the full post here.
THE HEADLINES SCREAM BEWARE OF THE OSCAR CURSE.
The recent reports state the theory that after an actress gets the most desired trophy, The OSCAR, she gets the boot from her significant other. It's more likely these ladies were married to some guys who couldn't deal with these ambitious, powerful ladies.
Let's look back at some of the the winners. Most recently is Sandra Bullock. That's a no brainer: her husband made headlines cheating on her a with a Nazi-outfitted posing stripper just days after she got the golden guy.
Another recent breakup is that of Kate Winslet and her husband-director Sam Mendes. That''s easy: he needed a new muse. (Rumors are that he got too close to his much younger leading lady, Rebecca Hall.)
Let's move on. Reese Witherspoon and Ryan Phillippe.
Read the full post here.
THE PRODUCERS OF Pirates of the Carribean 4 are looking for young models aged 18-25, with dancer-like bodies who can swim. But here's a catch, they have to have real boobs. Read the casting call: Must have real breasts. Do not submit if you have implants.
Hollywood is in panic. Heidi Montag is calling her plastic surgeon.
Don't try to fool them, they'll put you to test. Yep: You'll try on clothes, bounce around, then pass or flunk the jiggle-test.
If the silicone -free trend catches on, half of Hollywood is walking the plank!
Madi S. is mom to two kids and three cats. She loves pop culture news, movies, fashion, travel, reading and observing the world.
AND THE OSCAR GOES TO…JESSE JAMES FOR HIS ROLE AS good, adoring husband! Not that his forced smile gave him away!
On his way to the Governor's Ball after his wife won a best actress Oscar, Jesse declared with a tear in his eye, "She's beautiful. She's amazing. She takes my breath away. Sometimes I look at her and I do, I just lose my breath."
Was he talking about Sandra or his head-to-toe-tattooed girlfriend, Michelle "Bombshell" McGee?
The tabs say that the Monster Garage reality TV star was sexting McGee as recently as March 14th. Now he's issued an apology to Sandra and his kids, saying that the "vast majority of the allegations are untrue and unfounded." Really, then why's he apologizing?
And James' will soon have more to apologize for: TMZ says someone's shopping a pic of him wearing a Nazi costume and making a Nazi salute.
I can't stop thinking about Sandra Bullock's poor judgment in choosing a husband. Another 'sweetheart' heartbroken by a "bad boy." Come on! His ex-wife is a porn-star who spent time in jail, he has 3 kids with 2 different women. Sandra, you should have run at "hello!"
Madi S. is mom to two kids and three cats. She loves pop culture news, movies, fashion, travel, reading and observing the world.
ARE TIGER WOODS AND JESSE JAMES afflicted with the Madonna/Whore complex?
As the marital dramas play out between Tiger and wife Elin Nordegren, and James and Sandra Bullock, similarities between the couples suggest that both men might have psychological problems being intimate with the women they love.
In the simplest language, men who suffer from the Madonna/whore complex are sexually incapable of sexually loving their "good" wives due to their underlying belief that sex is debasing. To meet their sexual needs, these men pursue the "whore" with whom, once they have sex, is never good enough for marriage.
"In the mind of the sufferer, love and sex cannot be mixed…" according to Wikipedia. "He will reserve sexuality for "bad" or "dirty" women, and will not develop "normal" feelings of love in these sexual relationships.
Read the full post here.
THE INTERNET WAS A STICKY WIDGET this week with spillage from affairs of the rich and famous gone bad. Now it's official: Sexting is the new coin in the realm.
Notorious porn star and Tiger sex toy Joslyn James went Rambo and launched an Internet archive documenting sext messages Eldridge sent her. The texts include the most intimate language imaginable between whore and the world's most famous john. James appears to hold nothing back from a prying public: To wit: "I want you to beg for my cock. Kiss you all over to convince me to let you have it in your mouth." There's much more for those interested.
Then Sandra Bullock's creepy husband is exposed as slimy two-timer when tattoo model Michelle McGee tells In Touch that she's had a year-long affair with the reality TV star. The tabloid releases a press release touting Jesse James' text messages to McGee, which so far pale compared to Tiger's dirty talk.
Reports surface that McGee received $30,000 for her story and texts.
Perhaps not coincidentally, in a 2009 online study entitled, "Sexting…Is It All About Power?" carried out by RealPsychology.com, researchers concluded that "as a whole, sexters were more likely to strive for power and control than non-sexters."
And sexters with high "power profile" scores had "a strong desire for power, and may often take control in an abrasive or aggressive manner," according to the site.
The week's events bolster those claims.
FOUR YEARS AFTER SHE HAD HIM AT HELLO, GQ delivers a revealing interview with the crazy at the center of John Edwards' storm.
Rielle Hunter, who turns 46 March 20th, invites a reporter over for a sleepover, confides details of her deceitful two-year sexual liaison with a presidential candidate who's wife has cancer, poses seductively on the resulting love child's twin bed with Kermit, Dora, Barney and a hoot owl, then cries "repulsive" when the pictures go meta.
The media had a field day Monday mocking Hunter's witless blunder. The Boston Herald snaps "Really Rielle? Get Your Pants On!" while Wonkette cracks, "RIELLE HUNTER IS NOW SAD! Jesus, did she think they'd Photoshop some pants onto her?"
Read the full post here.
THE FANTASTIC MR. FOXY Johnny Weir doesn't need no stinkin' Stars on Ice gig. That's for little girls and sparkly boy-wannabes. The fabulous Johnny's got bigger dreams: His own touring ice show with the Lady Gah!
Just days after reports hit the web that Weir was denied a spot on the U.S.'s only figure skating tour because he wasn't "family friendly," Johnny confirmed to Access Hollywood that the rumors were true.
"It is for real. I've never been invited to do Star on Ice before," Johnny told Billy Bush. "It's disappointing that I can't perform for my American fans…
all because I'm not 'family friendly' enough."
Read the full post here.
IT'S ALL PART OF THE PLOT:
Lady Gack goes to L.A. Airport for an international flight wearing a tulle veil and dark shades and refuses to remove them for security, prompting a full body search and provoking bondage fantasies for her fans.
And it all happens just in time for the release of her new video!
Telephone, featuring Beyoncé, made its web debut Thursday, prompting Gaga's little monsters to slobber and wet their panties.
The video depicts Lady G being tossed into a prison cell and stripped searched by two butch prison guards. But she's not incarcerated for too long before Honey B shows up, bails her out and steers the Pussy Wagon on a murderous road trip.
The 9:22 video is cliche wrapped in camp shrouded in homage to 70s Blackspoitation, made-for-TV lesbian prison flicks, feminist outlaws Thelma & Louise and Quentin Tarantino.
"I told you she didn't have a dick,'' says one jailer after tossing Gags in a cell and strip searching her. "Too bad,'' says a second.
And with those quips, Gaga responds to the wags who've taken to publicly groping her privates with their tongues looking for a penis. But is it mere coincidence or something more when, seven minutes in, the refrain I don't want to talk anymore increasingly begins to sound like "I don't want to tuck anymore?"
Read the full post here.
LEAVE US ALONE!
Who are we? We're women who don't shave our legs. And -- surprise -- we're even happy!
We have boyfriends and husbands and even win Oscars.
It's kinda funny that Mo'Nique keeps having to defend her hairiness to the world. I guess she, like me, grew up without that stigma. We're about the same skin color, and her legs are much hairier than mine, but I'll stand with girlfriend any day.
I remember that it took years for Nair to have a black chick in one of its commercials. The models were still all white in the '80s.
When I was young, I never thought that Nair was for me or anyone I knew.
Read the full post here.
HOW VERY "NOW!"
In today's crazy mixedup world, when up is down and bad is good, Mattel brings to market the Barbie versions of Mad Men's Don and Betty, Joan and Roger.
When you look this good, who cares if you sleep around, have three-drink martinis and marry rapists or children beneath your station? Bored doll collectors-cum-housewives want to get in on the naughty too.
The new dolls will sell exclusively at AMCTV.com and BarbieCollector.com for $74.95 a pop. According to the New York Times, "The dolls come with period accessories like hats, overcoats, pearls and padded undergarments, but no cigarettes, ashtrays, martini glasses or cocktail shakers. "
For these swinging Barbies, it's BYOB.
DEAR JENNIFER,
Wow! You're smokin' on the upcoming cover of W magazine posing with fake lover Gerard Butler. I'm praying you two got sweaty and did the nasty right in front of photographer Steven Klein, the same snapper who recorded Mr. and Mrs. Smith playing dress up back in 2005. That way he can bear witness to the world, vouch that you've got a bit of your own sexual fire, even if ex-beau John Mayer didn't coin a term for you.
Girlfriend, I'm gonna give it to you straight: It's time to jump on the stick and start making baby. You just celebrated your 41st, and yeah, you've got lots of green. But even with all of LaLaLand's magic, you can't turn ovaries into fangirls and have them swoon at your command.
Read the full post here.
SINCE I HAIL FROM PHILLY, PART OF MY BLOGGING GIG IS TO SCRUTINIZE EVERY 30-something dark-haired, sharp-nosed douchebag I come across hoping to land a sighting of Arthur Kade.
Well, it hasn't happened yet and I don't think I could stomach it if it did. If you don't know Kade, he's a wannabe nominated by Gawker as "Douchebag of the Decade." He lost -- to Joe Francis of the Girls Gone Wild franchise, unquestionably a bigger douche.
But Arthur's still striving. Here's a little piece by Philly filmmaker Aymar Jean Christian that is highly amusing and a great take on the Kade phenom. Done documentary style with commentary from Philly editors, the short film showcases Kade in all his awesome obnoxious famewhoreness, proving once and for all that Kade is a legend in his own mind. Enjoy.
SexyChattyCatty is a regular contributor at CrabbyGolightly.com where she writes on TV, America's favorite snack food.
THE SNAPS ARE ARRIVING AND the votes for the winners and losers of the red carpet are in. (And I cast them all!!)
Standout of the night: Inglourious Basterds star Diane Kruger looking beguiling in a cream and black ruffled gown. I don't care what the Fugly girls say, she gets my vote.
Rachel McAdams shimmers in muted blue and violet sleeveless gown with flowing skirt. Her lack of jewelry punctuated her and the gown's beauty.
Meryl Streep looks stately in a simple white gown. Queen Latifa looked a long way from Newark, N.J. in a stunning satin mauve dress that had one baubled silver sleeve.
Kathryn Bigelow looked like a winner in a sleek gray silver gown dress. And Kate Winslet as usual gets high marks for her shimmering silver gown and eyepopping bling.
And so now I crown them winners of the red carpet!
AND DIDN'T WE ALL SEE THIS COMING? Note to expecting parents and the media: do not label young children with the nickname "Blanket."
California child welfare workers are back at the Jackson Family's Encino funhouse this afternoon to further investigate claims that Michael Jackson's youngest son was shocked by a stun gun. TMZ reports that investigators returned to question an employee who's been unavailable the last several days.
A tipster leaked to media outlets on Monday that Jaafar Jackson, 13, allegedly bought two stun guns off the web and had played with the guns for three days before being caught. He was allegedly found by security staff chasing Jackson's youngest son named "Blanket" with the gun. An attorney for the family denied the claims and said only one gun had been purchased and that it had been confiscated quickly.
Jackson's three children Prince Michael I, Paris and Prince Michael II reside with a coterie of cousins, aunts and caretakers in the house, including brothers Jermajesty, 9, and Jaafar. Their mother, Alejandra Oaziaza, bore children to both Jermaine and Randy Jackson. In addition to Jermaine's sons, she is mom to Genevieve, 20, and Randy Jr., 18, whose father is Randy Jackson.
STEREOTYPING IS ONLY ALLOWED ON THE INTERNET. Do not try this at home!
Perez Hilton
High schoolers who use Proactive.
TMZ
Trolls.
BuzzFeed
Frat boys who went to state colleges.
Salon
Voters who donate only to presidential candidates.
Gawker
Smart kids who ranked in the middle of their class.
Read the full post here.
WHAT'S WRONG WITH A GIRL WANTING TO FEEL ALL SPARKLY AND PRETTY? Or have things turned so upside down that fabulosity belongs only to the purview of boy skaters and vampires?
The Vajazzle (aka "vajazzler") is the glittery euphemism for applying glue to a Brazilianed pubis and then affixing tiny bedazzling rhinestones. It’s been both hailed as recreation for "Glittertwati" and dismissed as "a real hood rat ghetto sort of thing. Or a J Lo thing, which is maybe the same thing." It's also been called the modern merkin.
The trend went meta after Jennifer Love Hewitt cooed about her pretty hot pink twat while visiting a talk show.
Read the full post here.
DAVID GEFFEN'S WORTH about $4 billion, dates pretty college boys, buys $100 million paintings and tries semi-unsuccessfully to keep the world away from his Malibu beachfront property.
Over on the other coast, Carly Simon, who doesn't consider herself "not gay," has been living below the radar on Martha's Vineyard (who is this Martha anyway?).
Back before digitally-recorded history, when Divad was Carly's producer at Elektra Records, she recorded a song called You're So Vain which made her rich enough to buy the Eastern Seaboard. But it also generated a mystery.
The question: "Who is so vain?" has lasted for 38 years.
Read the full post here.
JUST DAYS AFTER SCIENTISTS WHO REFUSE TO STUDY DOLPHINS IN CAPTIVITY argued that those marine animals should be deemed "nonhuman persons," a six-ton Orca confined in tanks at Florida's SeaWorld killed a human for the third time.
It was just last Sunday at the annual American Association for the Advancement of Science conference that scientists debated whether dolphins deserve special rights because of their human-like qualities.
"Dolphins appear to be self-conscious, unique individuals with distinctive personalities, memories and a sense of self, who are vulnerable to a wide range of physical and emotional pain and harm, and who have the power to reflect upon and choose their actions," Thomas I. White of the Oxford Centre for Animal Ethics reportedly told the crowd.
The proof? Researchers have found in studies that dolphins whose bodies were "marked" quickly swam to observe their reflections in a mirror. Because these experiences verified self-awareness, these same scientists have vowed not to study dolphins in captivity because they believe it's cruel.
Read the full post here.
AWWWW, AREN'T THEY PRECIOUS?
And there is not a hint of snark in that comment.
Nicole Richie released a pic of her 5-month-old son son on her website today giving him a smooch while standing before the Eiffel Tower.
"In the City of Lights with my true love," Nicole tweeted today.
The adopted daughter of Lionel and Brenda Ritchie has turned into quite a beautiful lady who seems like her head's screwed on pretty straight. At least, by Hollywood standards. She's proof it's possible to grow up privileged and grounded. Or what maybe that's what babies will do for you.
Thanks for sharing this beautiful pic, Nicole.
YOUR LADY GAGA ALARM GOES OFF AT 6:05 A.M. sharp.
You hop out of bed, make a piping hot cup of coffee, fire up the laptop and begin reading the news. An article on the rise of The Oath Keepers catches your attention. They are a loosely-knit national group armed to the teeth -- often with advanced military and police training -- who have dedicated themselves to protecting their freedoms and the consititution itself. "They sound nutty and dangerous," you mutter to yourself.
Sip.
But you begin to wonder: "With all this business about Homeland Security and the suspension of individual rights in America, maybe they have a point?"
Read the full post here.
THERE'S AT LEAST ONE VAGINA THAT HE ISN'T ALLERGIC TO.
Reluctant vampire/boy toy Robert Pattinson told the U.K's The Sun Sunday night:
"It is extremely difficult but we are together, yes. We can't arrive at the same time because of the fans. It goes crazy.
Pattinson and Stewart both attended the British Academy of Film and Television Arts (BAFTAs). Stewart won the Orange Rising Star award, while the Brit Pattinson was a presenter.
"This was supposed to be a public appearance as a couple but it's impossible,"' Pattinson reportedly said. "We are here together and it's a public event but it's not easy. We have to do all this stuff to avoid attention."
The two arrived separately and sat at different tables.
The hotties have long been rumored to be dating one another but have deliberately kept out of the public eye due to zealous Twilight fans.
Now that the truth's out, can vampire love last after exposure to the sunlight?
THIS PIC PURPORTS TO SHOW CONAN O'BRIEN KISSING A NONHUMAN DOLPHIN WHILE ON VACATION.
We're not buying it, unless Conan's deal with the devil to look perpetually young was called off when he left NBC's employ.
We think this must be Conan's batty older uncle, you know, the one they keep in the attic. 'Cause unemployed talk show hosts in search of a gig don't let themselves go like this in the space of a month.
IF PERCEPTION IS EVERYTHING, MAYBE THAT EXPLAINS WHY ON FRIDAY TIGER WOODS appeared fatter, older, balder and much more human.
And contrite, too! Don't forget contrite.
For that was the point of Woods' worldwide apology for detonating his career and family with "sexual napalm,'' to borrow a phrase from John Mayer.
In a carefully crafted apologia delivered in 13:32 minutes, the fallen golf god seemed hellbent on piecing together the shattered shards of his once-mythic life.
But here was something different: he didn't point the finger at anyone else. He didn't blame it on his father's alleged womanizing; he didn't blame it on the enabling behavior of his handlers or the sycophants who surround him. (Though that was evident with just a quick through the audience.
Read "Tiger Woods Fall Prey To The Chase For Magic Pussy here.
Read the full post here.
THEY WERE THE KING AND QUEEN OF THE ICE RINK.
The King: talk, dark and handsome Evan Lysacek, originally from Illinois, who performed his long program with a steely and disciplined determination to dominate.
The Queen: the glittery, fluid and feminine Johnny Weir, skating the "the best he's ever been -- ever,'' according to NBC's Olympics skating commentator Scott Hamilton.
And even though he mesmerized, skated his winningest, it suspiciously wasn't enough for the Pennsylvania native to take home a medal.
The long program at the 2010 Vancouver Olympics upended Russia's 18-year reign over the men's figure skating contest.
Read the full post here.
LOOK! IT'S A BIRD, IT'S A PLANE, IT'S THE SUPER G!
Gaga soars over the crowd at the Brit Awards where she snagged awards for International Female Solo Artist and International Album (for The Fame) and International Breakthrough Act.
Did anyone else or thing matter at the show? Who can tell when The Lady G envelopes attention with her white wings and birdnest's wig.
Just looking at these pictures is so exhausting that I haven't time or energy to read about anybody else.
Read the full post here.
I'M READING THE MUCH BALLYHOOED PLAYBOY INTERVIEW WITH SELF-PROFESSED "douche-bag" John Mayer when I have an "a ha moment". And no I'm not goosing myself while reading how John jerks off as the filmtracks of his past loves play over and over in his mind.
I'm talking about an eureka instant when insight strikes: this charm John Mayer is the male version of loose lips Megan Fox.
Aren't these faux sophisticates just opposite sides of the same coin? Hot conquests who hated school, suffer from Tourette's and insipidly blather on about whatever wisp of a thought that flits through their minds.
John, for instance, happily prattles on about seeing 300 cunts before even hopping out of bed, while Megan brags how she's a total slob, pinches loafs and doesn't flush.
Read the full post here.
THE CLOSET THE PUBLIC WILL EVER GET TO THE TRUTH about Michael Jackson's mental and physical state will come during the criminal trial of Dr. Conrad Murray on manslaughter charges.
For this reason, I'm looking forward to the testimony of Murray, Jackson family members, nanny Grace Rharamba, and any and all other players in the Michael Jackson death drama.
Media are already lining up outside the Los Angeles county courthouse awaiting Murray's "perp walk" as he is expected to arrive in court today to be formally charged with involuntary manslaughter.
Undercover police reportedly will be in the crowd to protect Murray from any crazed Jackson fan who might try to attack Murray.
Read the full post here.
TO THE TWISTED AND CONTROLLING MIND OF STEPHEN GARCIA, it wasn't enough to kill himself and his nine-month-old son to spite an ex-girlfriend. He had to have the last word.
In his final vengeful and selfish act, Garcia, 25, shot his son Wyatt to death before turning the gun on himself in a parked vehicle on a rural road in Twin Peaks, Calif.
The murder-suicide was the final act of a tragedy that had played for weeks on the social medium Facebook, the Internet, and in Joshua Tree, Calif. courts.
Garcia was enraged and bitter that his ex-girlfriend, whom I will not mention out of spite to him, had become involved with another man.
So in exhaustive, obsessive detail, he had for weeks begged, pleaded and threatened his ex-girlfriend through Facebook, text messages and his personal website.
"HOW DO YOU THINK THIS IS GOING TO AFFECT ME FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE?," Garcia wrote. "HOW IS IT GOING TO AFFECT WYATT? DO YOU HONESTLY BELIEVE IM (sic) GOING TO JUST SIT BACK AND WATCH WYATT BE RAISED BY ANOTHER MAN? HOW LONG BEFORE I DO SOMETHING STUPID?"
A final video and obituary was posted on Garcia's Facebook page within hours of Garcia's death but it remains unclear if it was posted before or after the crime. In it, he makes the ridiculous claim that he killed his son to protect him. He also characterized the deaths as "punishment" to his exgirlfriend.
Read the full post here.
OOOH LOOKIE! REALITY TV STAR AND SKATING CHAMP JOHNNY WEIRD is one of Lady Gaga's little monsters.
Actually, it's Weir, but you just know he's spent his whole life with that 'd' appendage. Maybe that's why he identifies with the Lady G, who is rumored to have an extra accessory of her own. The Olympic skater even sat next to Stefani's mom at a recent concert in New York City.
Chalk up another gay for GaGa, despite what Johnny will or won't say.
But he doesn't have to say much when Be Good Johnny Weir, airing Mondays at 10:30pm (Eastern) on Sundance, shows the skating queen bubble-bathing and lolling in bed with his ''best friend" Paris.
Read the full post here.
A BRITISH ONLINE GAME MAKES AN UGLY JOKE OUT OF THIRD-WORLD ADOPTEES becoming de rigueur accessories for "wannabe style mavens."
At the virtual playground My-Minx.com, players can adopt children fashioned after the children of Madonna, Angelina Jolie and actor Ewan McGregor.
Players can choose from Maddox, 3, who eats cockroaches, Pax, 5, who loves Vietnamese noodles, Zahara, 4, who enjoys "guinea pig."
Another ''adoptee,'' named after McGregor's daughter Jamiyan, enjoys eating rats.
Once purchased, players can dress their orphans in designer duds and try selling their pictures to celebrity magazines.
Read the full post here.
THE LONG NIGHTMARE IS OVER FOR MISS LONELYHEARTS: The she-wolf that stole her husband is getting her comeuppance.
The world trembles that the singular Brangelina is once again merely "Brad" and "Angie," as speculation boils that the beauteous twosome is kaput.
And in an instant the the question becomes : Will Jennifer Aniston and Brad get back together?
It's too soon to predict, and our money is on 'no.' But what a satisfying twist to a torrid love story that began when Pitt and Jolie hooked up while starring opposite each other in the movie Mr. and Mrs. Smith.
“And in an instant the question becomes: Will Jennifer Aniston and Brad get back together?
”
Shortly after the film role, Pitt divorced Jennifer, dubbed "America's sweetheart," and took up with the hypnotically dangerous Angelina, the girl who purportedly French-kissed her brother and wore vials of blood around her neck.
Read the full post here.
"I AM QUINN'S FATHER," Former presidential candidate John Edwards said today in what is surely one of the most anticlimactic public pronouncements ever made.
Finally, after three years of lying, cheating, denying, conspiring, obfuscating and hiding in hotel bathrooms, Edwards admitted to fathering an illegitimate child who is the spitting image of himself. As if we all didn't know already.
In a written statement to NBC about the daughter he fathered with videographer Rielle Hunter, Edwards said, "I will do everything in my power to provide her with the love and support she deserves…It was wrong for me to ever deny she was my daughter."
The Associated Press reported that Edwards' wife, Elizabeth, who tirelessly avoided the truth about the girl's paternity for two years, said of the revelation: "Our whole family feels relieved."
Last May, Mrs. Edwards told Oprah that she had "no idea" if Frances Quinn Hunter, now 2, was her husband's child. "It doesn't look like my children, but I don't have any idea,'' she said.
The recently published book Game Change quotes Mrs. Edwards as saying of her husband's denial: "I have to believe it. Because if I don't, it means I'm married to a monster."
Read the full post here.
IT WAS EASY TO SEE WHY ROBERT DOWNEY JR. ONCE HAD A SUBSTANCE PROBLEM AT Sunday's Golden Globes: Hollywood's most likeable habituae was a mass of jangly, manic energy while giving his acceptance speech for best actor in Sherlock Holmes.
"If you start playing violins, I will tear this joint apart," were the first words out of Downey's mouth, and we were afraid he might be serious.
Read the full post here.
MO'NIQUE STOLE THE SPOTLIGHT AT THE 67TH GOLDEN GLOBES after winning for her turn as an abusive mother in the movie Precious that actress Helen Mirren called "raw poetry."
Mo'Nique, 42, swept onto the Beverly Hilton stage with Oprahesque confidence in a gold sleeveless gown.
"First, let me say thank you God for this amazing ride that you're allowing me to go on. And everybody kept asking me did I know my speech. And I said no I don't know what I'mma say because I don't want people to think that I just know that I done won something. So, no, I don't know."
But her delivery was better than this sounds!
"But I'm shaking and when I tell ya'll I am in the mist of my dream. And when I look into the eyes of the man that I stood next to at 14 years old. And I said to him one day we are going to be stars and he said, 'You first.' And we walked this red carpet together tonight. Sidney I love you more than you will ever know baby.
Read the full post here.
FUNNYMAN Ricky Gervais starred in a role of his own making last night: Edward Scizzorsmouth.
In a room full of celebrities buffed to a glow, the British actor was all angles and sharp blades.
"Why oh why was The Invention of Lying not nominated? I don't know, I just don't know. Maybe the DVD will win an award," he said pulling it out from below the podium. "That's out Tuesday at Wal-mart. So go and buy that."
In addition to clumsily self-promoting his movie and television show, Gervais' broke a cardinal sin of comedy: he didn't play to the audience.
"I've had a little work done," he said after joking about the plastic surgery of the stars. "I've had cheek implants …and I've had a penis reduction. Just got the one now. And it is very tiny. But so are my hands so when I holding it it looks pretty big.
Read the full post here.
THE 67TH ANNUAL GOLDEN GLOBES DIDN'T LOOK A DAY OVER 30 as Hollywood's preternaturally preserved elite gathered Sunday to celebrate themselves.
"Looking at the all the faces here reminds me of some of the great work that has been done this year…by cosmetic surgeons," quipped the night's host, cheeky court jester Ricky Gervais. "You all look great."
"It is an honor to be here in a room full of what I consider to be the most important people on the planet: Actors," he added. "They're just better than ordinary people, aren't they?"
The audience, a veritable Who's Who of Hollywood, glimmered in agreement.
Read the full post here.
DID LADY GAGA CANCEL HER THURSDAY NIGHT INDIANA CONCERT TO PREP FOR HER FRIDAY MORNING PERFORMANCE AT OPRAH'S SHOP?
The Lafayette Journal & Courier reported last night that Lady Gaga cancelled her concert at Purdue University's Elliot Hall Of Music.
The paper reported that "before the announcement, at least two EMTs were confirmed to be backstage by Elliott Hall staff. One unconfirmed rumor was that the performer had passed out."
But officials at three hospitals in Lafayette, Ind., said that neither Lady Gaga nor a Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta were treated at their facilities. And an employee at one hospital said, "The rumor was false. When we contacted police, they said she left Lafayette in a private vehicle."
Gags is skedded to visit Oprah's Chicago studio -- figuratively up the road about 108 miles --for a 9am taping.
Read the full post here.
AS IF J SCHOOLS AREN'T BLEAK ENOUGH THESE DAYS, WITH U.S. NEWSPAPERS VIRTUALLY IN A "FREE FALL," now comes a case that would give any student reporter pause.
Cook County prosecutors have subpoenaed the grade book and emails of a Northwestern University professor who has helped free 11 innocent men from Illinois' death row since 1996.
Prosecutors are seeking David Protess' files to determine if students' were pressured to find exculpatory evidence for good grades while investigating the conviction of Anthony McKinney for a 1978 murder.
Read the full post here.
THE "POWERFUL ESSENCE" OF ART CLOKEY'S FORMULA FOR FUN WAS GUMBY, a stretchy green good thing that entertained kids and adults alike for four decades.
Animator Clokey died in his sleep at his home Friday in Los Osos, Calif., his son Joseph told the Los Angeles Times. He had suffered repeated bladder infections.
Clokey's creation Gumby debuted on The Howdy Doody Show and later starred in its own claymation program along with sidekick, Pokey.
Gumby battled blockheads, visited the moon, got lost in Chinatown and encountered rain spirits on unpredictable adventures.
The Times' obituary says Clokey was born Arthur Farrington in Detroit, Michigan. His father died when he was 8 and his mother abandoned him after she remarried. He was adopted by famous music teacher Joseph W. Clokey who took him on trips throughout North America."That's why 'The Adventures of Gumby' were so adventurous," his son Joseph told the Times.
He also said there was a reason the character was green: "Gumby was green because my dad cared about the environment."
WITHIN THE NEXT SIX MONTHS, marriage in France is set to become a much more docile affair. The French government is attempting with a new law to decrease the harmful psychological effects of yelling within marriage.
The law will cover any type of rude behavior toward one's spouse including "repeated rude remarks about a partner's appearance, false allegations of infidelity and threats of physical violence." A warning would be given for a person's first documented decibels, with jail being the final repercussion.
There are many critics of the new law both here and in France. While well-intentioned, I find it to be both humorously offensive and ineffective. Who is to say when a conversation stops being a discussion and becomes an assault? Everyone within a marriage interprets things in their own way. If my husband tells me to "Shut Up!," and I then call him a dork, are we arguing or being playful?
Read the full post here.
VITRIOL SPEWING OVER Savicki vs. Baystate Medical Center illuminates workingclass rage and women's angst over reproductive rights, but will have little impact on the case should it make it to trial.
Tessa Savicki, 35, the mother of nine children who collects welfare and disability benefits, has sued a Massachusettes hospital claiming its staff illegally sterilized her.
In a lawsuit filed last November, Savicki claims doctors gave her a tubal ligation following the birth of her son rather than implant an intrauterine device. State law requires consent forms to be filed 30 days in advance of sterilization, but officials of Baystate Medical Center admit they cannot locate a form signed by Savicki.
"There was no medical reason for them to do this," Savicki told the Boston Herald. "That's my choice. This is my body.
Read the full post here.
BUZZ BISSINGER SIFTS THROUGH THE DETRITUS OF TIGER WOODS' career in an upcoming Vanity Fair issue that photographically depicts the golfer looking more like thief than legend.
VF's February cover shows Tiger bare-chested, wearing somber expression and dark stocking cap. The profile delivers more or less the same: A publicly undressed Tiger, no longer caped superhero, but an imperfect man who calculatingly obscured his darker impulses.
Bissinger stitches together by now the well-worn "alleged" anecdotes about Tiger's accidental unmasking -- the wrathful wife slicing him with a golf club; the fire hydrant; the Ambien-fueled sex capades; the spankings and hair pulling; the payoffs. He then wraps it all up into a tidy conclusion to satisfy the public:
"In the end it was the age-old clash of image versus reality, the compartmentalization of two different lives that inevitably merge at some certain point, whoever you are."
Well, at the very least we hope so, the idea of getting so snookered an insult to our collective intelligence.
Bissinger writes that: "Woods, to the bitter end and with a kind of hubris that revealed his fundamental arrogance, still felt he could beat the tidal wave back. When he was taken to the hospital for injuries, a fake name was used."
Read the full post here.
YIPPEE! EVERYBODY'S BLOWING HORNS OR TOOTIN' LINES TO THE NEW YEAR! Figuratively speaking, of course. Don't be tardy for the party!
At the stroke of midnight, we'll pat ourselves on the back for being older and wiser, Tiger Woods and Michael Jackson excepted. And what a year 2009 was!
We had the Gosselins and the Glambert, the Speidi and the Tiger serving up the shock and awful.
Then Farrah and Michael, and Patrick Swayze and Billy Mays all took their exits, God rest their souls.
But surely 2010 has bigger and better things in store. That's the promise of the New Year! And so we turn to CrabbyGolightly's third annual "WTF Celebrity Predictions." Ready? Here goes:
Golf's untameable Tiger comes out of hiding, visits the Church of Oprah and confesses his temporal love for Rachel Uchitel, who with her aging uterus wastes no time producing a Cablinjewasian.
Read the full post here.
WITH RUMOR THE INTERNET'S PREFERRED CURRENCY, IT HARDLY SEEMS TO MATTER WHAT'S TRUE OR NOT ABOUT TIGER AND HIS NO. 1 GAL PAL, Rachel Uchitel.
Tiger may or may not be sailing in the Bahamas with buddies. Or holding hands with Rachel in West Palm, Fla. Or seeking plastic surgery in Arizona to fix those gashes to his face from a golf club. Or possibly in deep, intensive marital therapy.
Or maybe it's all a bunch of horse shit. And/or he wants out, wants to be with his love, the woman he "connects" with.
Until the divorce papers are filed, and the pictures are snapped, we won't know if the future holds the "Mrs. Woods" title for Uchitel.
BUT. THERE. IS. ANOTHER. WAY! We can see what the stars ordain!
Don't laugh! Oh, wait a minute, this is info-tainment! Have yourself a guffaw! And check out what the instantaneous compatibility reading at CafeAstrology has to say about a Tiger/Rachel matchup.
SUN CONJUNCT MARS
Pure sexual attraction will unite the couple. They will have an ideal partner. They will be energetic, full of life and can undertake things together on the professional level or travel together on adventurous, unpredictable journeys. They respect each other's goals and drives, and don't stand in the way of their attempts to achieve their goals. Their body rhythms match well, and they share a basic physical bond that is hard to break.
MERCURY SQUARE VENUS
Their relationship will sometimes be agreeable, sometimes disturbed. They will like to share their ideas which are not always to the other's taste, so that they may have interminable discussions in order to convince each other of their mistakes, lack of judgement or lack of taste. (Hmmm. Reminds me of Tiger's alleged text messages to her!)
SUN SQUARE PLUTO
A great physical attraction will unite the couple, but this relationship is unlikely to be entirely healthy.
Read the full post here.
CHARLIE SHEEN'S GOT A RAP SHEET LONG ENOUGH FOR Two and a Half Men.
The Golden Globe winner faces a new round of charges alleging domestic violence after his third wife alleged he held her down and threatened her with a knife, news reports say. Radaronline.com claims the fight broke out after Brooke Mueller told her husband she wanted a divorce.
Mueller claims TV's highest paid actor held her down on a bed and said, "You better be in fear. If you tell anybody, I'll kill you," according to Aspen police.
Read the full post here.
THE PHOTO'S ALREADY BEEN REVEALED A FRAUD. BUT THE SNAP ALLEGED TO SHOW JOHN F. KENNEDY JR. carousing aboard a ship with naked women offers reprieve to Tiger Woods, and offers further proof that powerful men share a common pursuit.
You can come out of hiding, Tiger! The coast is clear! Elin's in Sweden and you're no longer danger of swinging golf clubs!
TMZ's false report (and the subsequent false reporting here and all over the web) reminds us that Tiger's womanizing is nothing new in the annals of powerful men.
Read the full post here.
WE IMAGINE THAT SHE'S GENERALLY INSUFFERABLE, BUT our hearts go out to Ivana Trump this morning.
Firstly, for having the misfortune of aging so painfully and obviously on camera. (God damn that haughty Melania with her ridiculous faux-royal website.)
But we also feel bad for the rich hotelier for having the bad luck of being tossed off a Delta flight enroute to New York from Palm Springs after becoming enraged when unruly children ran through first class. After all, we're guessing she dropped at least $1,000 for that ticket and hasn't been around shrieking tiny tots in awhile.
While the regurgitated stories around the web make Ivana sound like a sourpuss, if you dig deeper you'll find a groundswell of sympathy for her on the comment boards. Here's a sampling:
Read the full post here.
AMERICANS ARE ADDICTED TO CELEBRITIES. We love them. But what we love even more than celebrities is tearing them down and destroying them and watching them squirm under the harsh light of fame.
We lap that stuff up and when we are done gnawing on their bones, we move on to the next victim. This decade has seen its fair share of melt-downs, racist rants, obscene whoring and just plain incompetence.
Lives have been ruined, careers have been lost, and in some cases, people have actually died. And it is with that in mind that we here at Heavy bring you the top 10 celebrity falls from grace of the decade.
10. Chris Brown -- How do you derail a promising music career that has people calling you the next Michael Jackson? Easy. You beat down your hot, famous girlfriend and then spend the ensuing weeks and months giving half-assed apologies that no one buys. Seriously, come on dude. Even OJ probably thinks you went a little too far. I mean, it's bad enough to slap a girl around but there were reports that Brown actually bit Rihanna. How out of your own head do you have to be for that to happen? At this point, I'm surprised they don't wheel Brown out in a straight jacket wearing one of those Hannibal Lecter masks every time he needs to make a public appearance.
9. Amy Winehouse -- Believe it or not, there was a brief window where Amy Winehouse was actually a respected musician and not a cracked out shell of a human being. As meltdowns go, hers was quick and spectacular. A taste of success is enough to drive even the most stable people mad, and when you combine that with the taste of the crack pipe, you're pretty much guaranteed to find yourself on the cover of every magazine looking like a junky, zombified version of Marilyn Manson.
8. Phil Spector -- Sure, everyone knew for years that Spector, the revolutionary pop music producer, was a bit of an eccentric. But being an eccentric is one thing. People can overlook that, especially when you are hailed as a genius. But people tend to frown on it when you straight up kill someone. Indeed. It's a little hard to come back from that sort of thing. One day you're known for the Wall of Sound, the next day you're known for the sound of some poor lady's brains hitting the wall.
7. Tom Cruise-- Apparently, at some point this decade, Cruise became tired of being a mere celebrity and decided to try his hand at being insane. Everyone remembers Cruise couch surfing and scaring the holy hell out of Oprah, and then accosting Matt Lauer for not understanding the evils of psychiatry. It was a hell of a coming out party, and though things have quieted down a bit for Cruise in the last couple of years, the damage has already been done. I can just about guarantee you that the next time you are in a movie theater and a trailer for a film starring Cruise comes on that half the audience will laugh.
6. Mel Gibson -- Once upon a time, Mel Gibson was one of the biggest movie stars in the world. And then he decided to make a little movie about the last days of Jesus, and, well, things kind of changed for Mad Max. Of course, it didn't help that Gibson found himself battling accusations that his film blamed the Jews for Jesus' death. That will tend to put a damper on things. So will getting busted for a DUI, calling a female cop Sugartits and then divorcing your wife and knocking up your new Russian girlfriend.
Read the Top 10 Internet Memes Of The Decade.
Read the Top 10 Game-Changing Hip Hop Events Of The Decade.
Read the full post here.
MY PERSONAL MOTTO IS ''Everything Goes Better With Glitter." Weird but true.
I have seen how tiny shards of color sprinkled over the grimmest day can making everything all sparkly and beautiful.
So perhaps I was among the few not surprised to read that tinsel sales are way up this year, according to the Wall Street Journal.
The story is filled with nonessential facts like tinsel "works on all 35 different species of Christmas trees." And a Philadelphia manufacturer was once known as the "The King of Tinsel." And the word tinsel derives from the French word estincele, meaning sparkle. Fun empty facts.
As a former journalist, I should probably look askanced at the Journal spending precious reporting hours on such filler. But, hey, it's a new day. No one cares anymore about making things better! No one has any hope for change! Let's just throw a party! I'll provide the tinsel!
It's practically a metaphor for America: cheap, shiny and sticks to everything.
IT IS PERFECTION. A movie for the ages. Truly.
What other movie plays 24 hours a day every year? What other movie ever has? What other movie ever could?
A Christmas Story is simple and pure and takes us back to childhood -- not our childhood -- but somebody else's. A childhood better than our own; of home and warmth and dreams fulfilled.
Of Ralphie.
Then here come Mephistopheles to ruin it all.
Former reality TV star Billy Jeffrey won the right to sleep in Ralphie's house.
Who? OK, "star" may be a stretch. He was on ABC's True Beauty a year ago. Nobody watched and he didn't win. If you eat something disagreeable over the holidays and need to puke it up, Billy has a MySpace page. There, he brags about his current career path -- touring Germany as a Chippendales dancer.
Read the full post here.
FOR THE FIRST TIME IN 35 YEARS, JAMES BAIN AWOKE this morning a free man.
The 54-year-old Florida man lived two-thirds of his life in prison after being wrongly convicted of kidnapping and raping a 9-year-old boy in 1974.
"I guess I kinda have to feel like when they first landed on the moon," he told reporters.
He also said, "I cannot feel angry. "I put all that in God's hands."
Bain had maintain his innocence all along and had filed six appeals seeking court review. Finally, with the help of the Florida Innocence Project, Bain persuaded a judge to have the evidence reviewed with DNA testing.
Read the full post here.
IF, WHEN YOU SAY YOU WANT A WHITE CHRISTMAS YOU MEAN SNOW, I'LL TAKE IT.
But Christmas trees adorned with white lights? Mantels with white candles? Blah humbug!
In my house, Christmas kitsch is a requirement. There's no more fun way to deck the halls than with whimsical (cheesy?) vintage decorations.
Here's some vintage or vintage-inspired finds from around the web.
Read the full post here.
GRANDMA SAYS IT'S A FAMILY MATTER, AND COURTNEY'S LAWYER SAYS EVERYTHING'S A-OK.
It's just that the "headstrong" 17-year-old wants to live with grandmom. Mosey along, nothing to see here.
It's a burden when the kid has to parent the parent, and from a distance it seems that Frances has been carrying that load for some time.
In Courtney's defense, it must be hell going through life accused of murdering your dead cult hero rocker husband without ever getting your day in court. At least, to defend yourself on that accusation.
May Grandmom offer Frances oasis from the daily storms.
ETERNAL FUCK-UP COURTNEY HATER LOST CUSTODY OF HER DAUGHTER FRANCES BEAN in court today.
Courtney's attorney told reporters that Frances has choosen to live with her deceased rocker dad's mom.
"Courtney's been clean for years and is perfectly fine," Keith A. Fink told People. "This is simply about Frances preferring to live with her grandmother at this time."
Now Kurt Cobain's only daughter, on the cusp of emancipation at 17, will be cared for temporarily by her fraternal grandmother Wendy O'Connor. In an interview last year with Harper's Bazaar said of her grandmother, "She's probably the person I respect most out of anybody in the world."
Read the full post here.
WHOA, WHOA, WHOA ORRIN G. HATCH, MORMON SENATOR FROM UTAH.
Imma happy for you and Imma letchu' finish writing your new Hanukkah song but I just want you to know: Driedel Driedel Driedel is the BEST Hanukkah song of all time. OF ALL TIME! (Shrug).
Seriously though, Mr. Hatch, I get it. You really like Jews and you feel bad that we really don't have that many holiday songs. But, seriously, we're good.
We've got the Driedel song, we have that Adam Sandler ditty and all its remakes, and even Bare Naked Ladies did a couple of songs for us. Really, that's all we need, I don't care who says otherwise.
I mean, come on man, I don't mean to stereotype my people, but seriously, we're Jews. If we really wanted more songs for this holiday we could easily bust out 3 or 4 in a couple of days.
Here's the dirty little secret about Hanukkah that those left-wing, Hanukkah activists and right-wing Hanukkah conservatives don't want you to know about; Hanukkah isn't even the Jewish gift giving holiday.
Read the full post here.
AMERICANS' DEBATE ON SAME-SEX MARRIAGE REACHED an all-time high during the 2004 election.
The religious right cited "the sanctity" of marriage as their main objection, but in an age when vows are exchanged on reality TV shows, what exactly are they talking about?
New Yorkers Rachel Murch and Matthew D'Olimpio are forcing the courts to answer that question. The married couple is seeking an annulment claiming their union violates "constitutional equality guarantees and is thus void" in New York.
We all have heard the claims that other couples -- including Brangelina -- have refused to marry until gays are allowed. But Murch and D'Olimpio have turned their protest into an act of civil disobedience.
Read the full post here.
SO TIGER'S A DOG. STOP THE PRESSES.
He's a man, right? And a wealthy one.
Here's the voicemail message one of Tiger's "transgressions" alleges he left on her voicemail:
"Hey, it's, uh, it's Tiger. I need you to do me a huge favor. Um, can you please, uh, take your name off your phone? My wife went through my phone. And, uh, may be calling you. If you can, please take your name off that and, um, and what do you call it, just have it as a number on the voice mail, just have it as your telephone number. That's it, OK. You gotta do this for me. Huge. Quickly. All right. Bye.''
Sloppy. Very sloppy.
The biggest shock here isn't that Tiger is a slut. A man has needs. But that he hasn't learned a thing from Michael Jordan. Or from Kobe Bryant.
When a wealthy athlete steps out, he's got to pay the "sex tax."
Read the full post here.
AND SO ANOTHER MASTER OF THE UNIVERSE IS FELLED BY THE MYSTERIOUS PULL OF MAGIC PUSSY, that mythic organ promising power, ecstasy and the first place in line among men.
If Tiger thinks his Thanksgiving was bad, we predict his Christmas will be tense and expensive as media report the golf god has had several steamy extramarital affairs.
Let's recite rat-a-tat-tat the famous men waylaid by putting peckers in that most tantalizing "other" hole. Bill Clinton, John Edwards, Eliot Spitzer, Hugh Grant, Jimmy Swaggart, Rudy Giuliani, Prince Charles, John F. Kennedy, David Letterman and on and on and on.
Billions of words have been written speculating what causes famous men to cheat.
And the answer?
Read the full post here.
MICHAELE AND TAREQ SALAHI CANCELLED THEIR INTERVIEW WITH LARRY KING LIVE, apparently holding out for money like the sucking vultures that they are.
Aren't they the living example of the real Real Housewives of Any County U.S.A.? The fact that most of them are poseurs? Just some nouveau riche who use profanity in public, flaunt their many shoes and handbags and never neglect to tell you how much their yacht cost?
We were promised the lives of socialites when the series was first buzzed about. Real ladies who lunch exposing their inner lives. That faded fast as we saw that all we were exposed to were price tags and boob jobs of people we’d never heard of.
The Salahis have taken the famewhore game to a whole 'nother level though. Their situation is both scary (how do you get that close to the president uninvited) and awesome (they got to meet the president!).
Read the full post here.
THE SAUCY WENCH IS SHOWING THEM, THE DOUBTERS WHO LAUGHED AND SCOFFED as she sashayed across Britain's Got Talent stage.
Susan Boyle dared to dream the dream and …whatyda know? It came true.
Her debut album has entered the UK charts at number one, becoming the fastest selling album of the year. By selling 500,000 copies, the release becomes the biggest debut album in the country's chart history.
The milestone comes a mere seven months after the Scottish spinster became an overnight sensation after singing Les Miserables' I've Dreamed A Dream on the British talent show. Her performance brought tears to the eyes of even the most jaded observers as she sung with a spirit and romance that belied her dowdy image.
Read the full post here.
ADAM LAMBERT FOUND A DARING WAY TO UP THE ANTE at the 2009 American Music Awards. Crotch shots and the men who love them aren't high on the list of concerns of the FCC, despite Lambert's simulated blow job being censored from the West Coast broadcast.
Amid the controversy, people forget this show's supposed to be about the music. And Adam Lambert fails as a musician. From a technical standpoint, the instruments frequently drown out his voice. And when they don't, I find myself wishing they would.
But "Glambert" captivates because he's a spectacle, which gratefully distracts from his screechy vocals. And now he's proven his worth as entertainer -- and political provocateur.
Read the full post here.
JAY-Z SWAGGERED AND SHAKIRA SIZZLED, WHITNEY SURVIVED AND KELLY CLARKSON POURED THE SOUL.
The 37th Annual American Music Awards showcased the nation's melting pot of music Sunday night, and proved that being black is the new black with the sexiest, most foot-stompin' music delivered by the brothers and sisters.
The night's best performances belonged to Jay-Z as he delivered his anthem to New York's streets (sorry, critics, I'm not tired of it) and Shakira smoked and stirred during Give It Up To Me. And Kelly Clarkson proved yet again that she's the biggest talent to emerge from American Idol.
Timbaland, Nelly Furtano and new artist SoShy also got the audience stompin' with Morning After Dark.
Whitney Houston delivered an uneven but affecting rendition of Strength that got a standing ovation from a sympathetic audience. That woman has put herself through hell and she's got the wounds to prove it.
Rihanna's disturbia stage act was riveting even if her vocals weren't as fierce on Wait Your Turn and Hard.
Mary J. Blige and The Black Eyed Peas took their turns heating up the party.
The night's biggest disappointments were Lady GaGa and Adam Lambert.
Gaga's platinum cyborg act proved oddly unaffecting, while the campy Lambert delivered his pre-Idol pseudo shocking act.
Read the full post here.
HER DOCTOR'S PRESCRIPTION: Have Fun.
So Nathalie Blanchard of Quebec took in a little Chippendales action, attended a birthday party, took a "sun" holiday. Then she did something stupid: she posted her pics in the throes of amusement on Facebook.
But Blanchard was on leave for depression from her job at IBM.
And, unbeknowst to her, depressed people can never, ever smile or have fun. They must stay grim inside their homes at all times of the day and night, never to show a crack of a grin in public.
And even if they do seek respite from gloom, they should definitely not be dumb enough to post their pictures on Facebook, where the world can pull up the pics and judge you.
And apparently Blanchard was in fact dumb, did post such pics, which were seen by her Manulife insurance agent, who declared that she looked to be having too good a time to be depressed. So Blanchard's sick benefits were cut, though the company does say they weighed other factors in its decision.
Now Blanchard's lawyer is investigating his options. And Blanchard wonders how Manulife saw the pics which she alleges were only supposed to be seen by her "approved" friends.
The story's moral?
Facebook is not your friend. Your insurance agent is not your friend.
Don't show fake friends your pictures.
DOESN'T GET ANY BETTER.
A boy so smitten he declares his love for you to the world in a video proposal.
And what two people wouldn't fall hard after venturing from Florida to San Francisco and then to New York together? These two share a sense of adventure.
Also, love and joy and fun -- and a dream.
"You are a joy," Justin Johnson tells his girlfriend of six years, Marissa Nystrom in a video he posted on Tumblr's dashboard.
"You are the one I love more than anything. I can't wait to see you every night. I love to wake up to you every morning. I want to wake up smiling next to you for the rest of our lives.
"Marissa, will you marry me?"
Doesn't get any better.
TONGUES WERE HANGING OUT ALL OVER THE WEB AS PLAYGIRL TEASED A PEEK AT LEVI JOHNSTON IN THE RAW.
As Sarah Palin began her publicity tour for Going Rogue, Levi took a page from her book and began his own outsider campaign as "player."
The photo preview of Johnson seemed deliberately timed to upstage Palin's opening salvo of her book tour. But while reviews of Palin talking to Oprah were tepid, Levi was knocking the socks off girls (including me) and gays across the web.
"I'd certainly let him take me behind the middle school and get me pregnant,'' gushed pssshwhatever on Gawker. "Yowza.'
And when SleeplessNights recommended Levi for president, Wrapitup countered, "Er, I wouldn't go that far. But Secretary of Keepin It Hott For Da Ladiez, mos def."
"Positively nibble-worthy,'' cooed Snugbug.
Read the full post here.
AS THE NATION GRAPPLES WITH THE OVERWHELMING TASK OF OVERHAULING A FLAWED HEALTH CARE SYSTEM, there is at least one victory for Americans this week.
After more than a decade spent languishing in Congress, a new law goes into effect Nov. 21st prohibiting employers from using genetic testing in decisions regarding hiring, firing or promotions.
"There's an absolute ban on the use of genetic information to make any kind of decision about employment," Christopher Kuczynski of the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission told the New York Times.
The passing of the Genetic Information Nondiscrimination Act was considered critical to the further development of genetic testing for "personalized medicine." For good reason, many Americans have avoided testing out of fear that results would be used against them by health insurance companies and employers. The new law prohibits employers' and insurance companies from overtly seeking employees' genetic information.
The next frontier in genetics law that legislators and jurists must address is whether organizations and individual researchers can patent genetic sequences from individuals' DNA. It will be years before that issue is resolved, but stay tuned.
THE BIGGEST FAMEWHORES IN HOLLYWOOD have written a book on -- ta da! -- how to be a fame whore! Because what other identifiable skills do Heid Montagi and Spencer Pratt have?
The titillating reality TV twosome are sharing their secrets on fame mongering in How To Be Famous: Our Guide To Looking The Part, Playing The Press and Becoming a Tabloid Picture.
In their latest devious calculation, Speidi teaches how to "increase your capacity for evil," feed the public's appetite for plastic surgery stories and and "outrageous behavior," and share the "secrets of celebrity couple math."
And in the opinion of this immodest couple, no one better personifies the game than the Jolie-Pitts.
"We'd love to sit down and discuss fame with them," Speidi, answering as one, told Playboy.com. "Consider this your formal invitation, Brangelina. Let's hang out sometime. We'll be SpeidiLina!"
Ha! That's hil-ar-i-ous, you kooky kids!
The duo also frets in mock horror about possibly offending Hollywood's reigning prom queen and king.
"We wouldn't want to piss them off. She might steal Spencer -- you know, because she steals people's husbands!" Bada bing. Bada boom.
We can practically hear the hiss of revulsion that Speidi's effrontery provokes in Angelina. "How dare they!," we feel certain she roars. "They're not worthy of our spit!"
Read the full post here.
WHAT IF YOU LIKE YOUR LIFE COMPARTMENTALIZED?
WHat if you don't want to sign in to HuffPo or BuzzFeed with Facebook?
What if you don't want to use your real name on email?
Tough luck to you.
The web masters are working overtime to make sure that users sign in to Facebook or announce to everybody in your Yahoo mailbox what you're doing at that moment.
The pressure's on for everybody to hook up or link in with everybody else, smothering out the smallest vestiges of privacy we have left.
Why? So marketers can collect the crumbs from every cookie embedded on your computer?
The growth in social networking is so explosive -- 700 million people worldwide are using some form of it -- that we forget that it's still a grand experiment.
But, increasingly, the potential consequences are spilling out.
We've all read dozens of stories about people who got fired after posting something stupid on Facebook. The latest example comes just today when news broke that a Georgia schoolteacher was forced to resigned because she was holding a drink in her hand.
Read the full post here.
OH Goody! Yet another chance to gawk and slobber over the playthings of the rich and famous! 
Now there's BillionaireXchange, an online auction site for the world's haves and want-to-sell-to-haves, whose members "are able to buy, sell, bid-on, auction, and or exchange luxury items all around the world.''
"Imagine trading your mansion in Beverly Hills for a Chateau in France, or your antique Rolls Royce for a new model Bentley, or even a bottle of your 1802 Chateau Lafitte for a bottle of 1947 Cheval Blanc,'' the copy coos. "The possibilities are literally endless. So, ask yourself, 'What is the luxury object of your heart’s desire?' "
A bit cheesy, yes, but then catering to the rich means serving up an endless plate of effusive claims of harder, faster, better.
Here the rich can peruse an online catalogue that includes a diamond-encrusted men's dragon pendant, baseball's A-Rod's Coral Gables, Fla. estate, and a bottle of Remy Martin Cognac the Black Pearl Louis XIII 1.7.
Read the full post here.
SCIENTISTS ARE REPORTING NEWS FROM THE LABORATORY THAT GIVES NEW HOPE TO MEN AND BUNNIES SUFFERING FROM ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION.
Researchers at the Institute for Regenerative Medicine at Wake Forest University Baptist Medical Center in North Carolina are reporting that they constructed a fully functioning rabbit penis that enabled bunnies to screw and procreate like, well, rabbits.
The hope is that the new technology will one day help men with erecticle dysfunction to perform sexually.
"Further studies are required, of course, but our results are encouraging and suggest that the technology has considerable potential for patients who need penile reconstruction," the Institute's Director Anthony Atala told LiveScience.
However, scientists stil have no cure for men suffering from emasculation.
THE ONLY GOOD RESULT FROM GETTING SLAPPED AROUND IS WISDOM, AND RIHANNA'S SHOWING PROOF OF HER HARD-EARNED LESSON.
After months of speculation as to what happened February 7, 2009 that left her bruised and battered and Chris Brown with five years' probation, Rihanna gave an in-depth interview with Diane Sawyer that put the kibosh on the mysteries surround that evening and gave an intimate look at the young singer's introspection after the incident.
The drive home from a Grammy-party that evening changed the paths of two young pop stars poised for worldwide success. By Rhianna's account, it all started with a text message found in Brown's phone from an ex-flame.
"I caught him in a lie," Rihanna said.
His lying -- and her refusal to drop the issue -- ignited the situation to the point where Brown eventually shoved Rihanna's head into the window, punched her in the face and bit her ear and ring finger. Her resulting injuries were photographed and released by the tabloid website TMZ.com
This Mike Tyson-esque turn for Brown was allegedly his first, sort of.
When Sawyer asked Rihanna had it happened before, she said no. When Sawyer pointed out that she had said he shoved her repeatedly into a wall before, Rihanna's rationale was, "He only shoved her into the wall once."
Read the full post here.
I DIDN'T KNOW THE PRACTICE OF GOING BLACKFACE WAS STILL UP FOR DEBATE in 2009. So let's review after four recent public displays.
First, French Vogue does a photo spread depicting supermodel Lara Stone in blackface.
Then four performers wear faux afros and paint their skin black in a mock performance of The Jackson 5 on an Australian variety show. Harry Connick, Jr., a judge on the show, verbally smacks the quintet saying they'd be banned if they had pulled that stunt in America.
Then Tyra Bank's America's Next Top Model dons its wannabes in different ethnic get ups.
Now comes the latest poor excuse for humor: Two Northwestern University students pull a Halloween trick by dressing up as African Americans.
For those who are too ignorant to know, performing in blackface was -- and is -- the outward manifestation of systemic racism, originally dating to the 19th century when white performers mocked and degaded blacks and perpetuated stereotypes associated with them.
Read the full post here.
I'M LIVING IN BASEBALL'S EMPIRE. And to Yankee haters I say, "Stuff it!"
I should have bet money as I rightly predicted that the New York Yankees would take home the prize in game 6 of the 2009 World Series.
How I feel for fans in other cities when they hear the New York media pitching phrases like "First World Series since 2003" and "First championship after a 10-year drought."
Take for example, the Phillies. Before last season, the defending champs hadn't seen a World Series since the early 90's -- and hadn't won one since 1980.
And just weep if you're a Cubs fan. Though that team has come close in recent history, Chicago's lovable losers haven't played a World Series since a bomb was dropped onHiroshima.
And the last time they won it all? Just before William Howard Taft became President of the United States.
There's no secret that there's lots Yankee haters out there. No doubt their loathing grew stronger last night as Yankees manager Joe Girardi hoisted the Commisioner's Trophy in the air in front of a packed house at the brand new Yankee Stadium last night.
Read the full post here.
