Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills: Reunion Redux Ad Naseum
YOU'RE KILLING US
Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills: Reunion Redux Ad Naseum
IN HONOR OF AN APPEARANCE TONIGHT BY THE ELUSIVE KIM RICHARDS, I plan to recap with a glass or two of box wine. Damn you Andy Cohen for dragging this reunion out for three freakin' weeks. And that's not the wine talking.
We get right into Taylor. Andy asks her if she thinks the suicide of her husband AND his business partner are related. She coyly says she thinks there is a possibility of foul play. (Even though she is the one who found him)The camera cuts to Kyle and she's smirking at this for some reason.
Taylor says that Russell secretly recorded her, had her take a polygraph when he thought she was cheating, and even hid in some bushes and overheard friends of theirs offering her help. After hearing this, she says he became enraged and thrashed their host and threw Taylor in the pool and held her down. Then he threw their hostess and the family dog into the pool.
Brandi looks startled when Taylor said she did not press charges and asked their friends not to as well. He also dislocated her jaw which she just popped back in. Wha, say whaaa? Popped back in? That’s what all the hubbub with Camille was about, the fact that she said, on air, that Russell "broke" Taylor’s jaw, not merely dislocated it.
Brandi says the entire situation didn’t ring true to her and that it just freaks her out and she doesn't want to talk about it since Russell can’t defend himself. Lisa says it's freaks her as well. A viewer wonders why the prospect of getting tossed out of the Housewives circle made Taylor leave, but beaten by her husband doesn't. Taylor says some jibber jabber. Blah, blah, people that don't like me haven’t lived a day in my shoes. Blah, blah.
Hey, Dana. Going from serious to frivolous, Andy asks Dana who she's wearing because she’s such a label whore. She laughs and says she's keeping mum tonight. We go through clips of her living her lavish, gloating lifestyle. We, and now she, see Camille's biting comments about her and how unimpressed Kyle was every time she opened her mouth. A viewer questions spending $25,000 on sunglasses. Dana says the other women have luxurious things too; she was just rolling with the crowd. Lisa says her spewing out prices all the time was a bit weird. So Dana gets defensive and says she's from humble beginnings and is proud of how far she's come. And she's gonna let everyone know. But then says her mom was poor and her dad was rich. So she’s a poor girl and a rich girl. And I guess that's hard from the way her voice is trembling.
Dana says Game Night was different for her. That Brandi made it seem drugs were going on in her house. And after she was gracious enough to invite Brandi, even after she joked about Dana’s boyfriend cheating. Brandi is surprised at this and says that Dana needs to view the tape again. They they talk about what an ass kisser she is, and she says she’s a kiss ass and sees absolutely nothing wrong with it. And she’d kiss ass again cause that’s the person she is. Well, I never. Really, I’ve never heard ANYONE be proud of themselves because they’re a kiss ass. Well, maybe Smithers… and Dwight Schrute.
Oh wow, here are Ken, Mauricio and Paul, the hunkiest husbands of Beverly Hills. Taylor runs over to have Paul feel her face. Ugh. He tells her to fatten up. That’s what she needs, not filler. How refreshingly honest. A viewer asks Ken about his crack on therapy. He still insists he can’t see himself in that situation, he’d rather sit down with his wife. And then he does what he’s told. Oh God, I love him and he is looking real sexy tonight, slouching in his eggplant colored suit. Delicious. We learn random women have sent Mauricio nude photos. Not me, I swear. Then, then, the gods are kind and we gets clip after clip of MAURICIO. Gosh, even a little bare butt action. Kyle screams when she sees this. I say ooooooo lala.
Brandi fairly shivers when Andy asks if she really wants to sleep with Ken. She says yes. Lisa says Brandi's always been up front about wanting Ken badly. She thinks it’s funny. Ken is looking hot, I’m telling ya. Andy brings up Cedric and Ken says that him being a life coach is the last thing he thought Cedric would tell him. He thought he’d say he had a rich boyfriend. Mauricio says his relationship with Kim is in limbo, that it’s not fun having issues with a family member. Ohhh, too short. Bye boys.
And, finally. here’s Kim. Whitney may be gone but Kim lives on and has decided to talk about her problems.
They’re in someone’s living room and Kim looks good -- healthy, happy. She comes out and says she’s an alcoholic. She still sounds drunk though, still has that drunk mouth. She’s been through rehab three times and feels this time she was ready. She’s just proud of herself for trying. Her family staged an intervention the day after Thanksgiving and she was ready. She just didn’t like herself anymore and she suffers from anxiety and panic disorder, with or without alcohol. She was sober when the season began, in Colorado, counseling Taylor when she fell apart. She began to go downhill on the trip to Sacramento. On game night she was not on crystal meth. She had been given new medication and had taken a bedtime medication. Andy tells her Brandi thought she’d helped Kim by calling her out. Kim says Brandi wasn’t helpful at all but she's sorry for hiding her crutches. She claims Brandi injured her entire family with the meth comment and of course, she’ll be civil but will never forgive her.
Andy asks if she’s seen herself at the SUR party. When she says she hasn’t he entices her into watching the scenes now. You can tell she really doesn't want to see it, but agrees anyway. We see Ken being mean to her, telling her to hurry, hurry, as she crawls around looking for something. We again get the door slammed in our faces. We see her, in the limo, examining the garbage of previous passengers, her dress strap falling off her shoulder. She stops him mid scene. She says she feels sad for that person, that it wasn’t her. We find out she and Ken are not together anymore and I'm sure Kyle is happy about that. She says you can love someone but not be able to live with them. She won’t admit Kyle was right about him not being the person for her. When talk turns to her kids her face brightens and she says they’re great. The show and her issues drove a wedge between her and her children. “Loving. Intense. With lots of friction,” is how Andy describes the sisters’ relationship, “but then they come together.” And with that introduction, Kyle comes out, the sisters kiss and she joins them. Kyle says the woman sitting beside her is Kim, the real Kim, the girl she grew up with and loves. Kyle says she doesn’t regret bringing her sister into the show. That, in the long run, it has helped. She still feels bad, though, that it was she who brought out Kim’s alcoholism. Andy asks why Kim was late to Hawaii and she says she couldn’t find her passport. They show clips of Kyle, badgering her sister, not being able to let it go, when Kim finally did arrive. Kim says she said she was sorry. Kyle says Kim missed a lot of the camaraderie of the trip. Then they get into a little spat about who has put whom through how much.
Andy talks about the pregnancy scare at SUR. Kim says she was three months late but that she was just joking. Ha, ha, ha. Andy says she didn’t seem like she was joking. Kyle just thanks God it wasn’t true. They continue to talk about how the family handled the alcohol situation. It’s the same as in all families. How Kim acts out, Kyle gets mad and then Kim sobers up, doesn’t remember what happened and wonders why her sister is mad. It’s a vicious circle they both agree. Kyle starts tearing up when she tells Andy about sending her sister off to rehab and how she could feel Kim was serious when she hugged her goodbye.
Kim vows to get sober and, for a change, look after her little sister some time. She knows she needs care too.
Tags: RHBH , Television







