The Consequences Of LiLo's F----d Up Court Antics
WTF, PART TWO
The Consequences Of Lindsay's F----d Up Court Antics
NICE JOB ON THAT JAIL SENTENCE, LOHAN. But in your pathetic haste to make more headlines you didn't stop to think of a few important things.
I know you're used to the posh, cushy Beverly Hills lifestyle, but suppose they don't have manicurists in LA prisons? And what if there are no pens with which to apply hidden messages to the prison guards on your acrylic fingertips? How, then, will you continue your campaign of innocence from behind bars?
And what about your slutty leggings line, 6126?
Where are no-talent casting couch darlings such as your mother going to get the cushioned knee protection they so desperately need?
AND what about your Linda Lovelace biopic, Inferno? What’s going to happen to all those irate bloggers waiting to cover the shoot with snarky commentary?
Well, I guess they’ll have to make do with your 90 day sentence instead.
I'd address the most important stuff you didn’t stop to consider, but we all already know too well these mistakes. They're what landed you in this awful, embarrassing, career-destroying position yesterday.
Miz J, who works in advertising, is a regular contributor and resident expert on all things Mad Men.
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