The ladies insist everyone was cool except Kelly.

Kelly claims Sonja was the only woman that was fun and Sonja continues to say she still thinks Kelly was the aggressor. Ramona spills that Kelly said she had no feelings during her entire marriage and Kelly accuses her of hitting the Pinot Grigio. Alex says she thought Kelly would be cool once away from LuAnn and Jill but, well, no.

Kelly throws out the breakthrough not breakdown line and says that 40-year old women should act better. Ramona insists no one was mean to her. Kelly accuses them of being jealous and of hateful behavior. Jill wants to drop it and the others agree.

We see them having a good time before Jill shows up on the island with her Long Island accented "Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii." Everyone's grim as they appear one by one in the inset watching the wrenching scene again. Jill says she got the message loud and clear that she was not wanted. Sonja says it's inappropriate to show up uninvited. Jill rolls her eyes when Sonja says Alex even started hyperventilating.

Jill says Ramona acted like it would be the end of the world if she didn't come on the trip but that she never promised to come. She and Ramona bicker about Ramona calling Jill to voice concern for Kelly. Bethenny says she also told Jill she needed to deal with Kelly, that the girl was going buck wild.

Then Jill accuses Ramona of being a horrible host and not even offering her and Bobby and glass of water. Where did that come from? But it got Ramona hot, hot, hot. She gets up off the couch and points and rails at Jill that she came in like a queen and thought they should worship her. Then everyone talks at once but when they calm down Ramona goes on about how nasty Jill is to her when the cameras are on and that she acts differently when they’re off.

LuAnn tries to come to Jill’s defense saying she went to St. John with the right intentions. Then Jill accuses Alex of causing all their troubles and wonders where her contempt comes from. Alex says Jill was so insensitive in St. John and if she had come in more humbly the situation would have gone better. Jill apologizes to Ramona for the surprise but said she wanted to talk to Bethenny and would go across the world to see Ramona. Ramona’s red-eyed as she says she thought Jill might come. She had asked Bethenny and Alex how they would feel about that and both said it would not be cool AT ALL.

Kelly throws in some stupid nonsense about acting but everyone just ignores her. Ramona says she spoke to Jill afterwards, and Jill cried and Ramona was sorry she had hurt her.

Kelly goes on about folks running back and forth, calling the women 8th graders and Ramona looks to the heavens and says "Oh, please just shut up." Jill's crying again and says she’s done but doesn’t walk off.

On to LuAnn: Her divorce, girl talk at the sauna, looking for fun not serious, kissing the blond fey guy, apartment shopping, at the recording studio, feeling James Brown, awful Auto-tune song, suck up producer, new French love.

She gushes over her new young Frenchie and how her ex would be surprised that she was dating a Jew. Andy asks if he's still with the Ethiopian princess and she says she doesn’t think so. A viewer says both Bethenny and Ramona called her out on extramarital affairs and LuAnn shuts up fast. Ramona’s embarrassed, says she didn’t know LuAnn was on the other end of the phone. Jill and that damn speaker-phone. LuAnn's a bit teary as she says she's trying to keep some things private. Countess title talk. Then a viewer's email that Cort was weird. She insists that she likes him and that they had chemistry but just didn't want to kiss all over him on camera and that he was at her house playing tennis recently. Her song is top 10 on iTunes but of course the critics hated it. She also insists she can carry a tune, and that Atlanta Housewife Kim Zolciak doesn’t have to like her song but she should be more supportive of another woman trying to cash in on her 15 minutes.

Andy calls Kelly the most contradictory housewife of the season and we go through her year's clips. Here she's posing for Playboy, even though she's shy, in one short dress after another as the women snip about a grown woman dressed in a tissue square. Now she's trying to be nice on the trip by taking photos of the ladies.Saying how genuine and real she is and how demented everyone else is. A viewer emails a list of her contradictions. She doesn’t eat processed food but eats gummy bears, doesn’t drink but orders up shots. Kelly laughs and says 'hey, every day is different' and yes, she does constantly contradict herself. Andy says the viewers think she doesn't make sense and Bethenny agrees. Lots of crosstalk and Kelly is appreciative that everyone is so interested in her. She says she turns the volume of the group up and down and maybe doesn't pay attention to everything they say. She says when she’s allowed to talk it's perfect. Bethenny nods like, yea, you still ain’t making sense bitch. Jill laughs that she doesn’t even understand Kelly’s tweets.

Kelly starts talking nonsense again and Bethenny can't stand it. Kelly accuses them of acting when they freak out and Bethenny says oh no girlfriend. Kelly says she thinks they're unpredictable and dangerous and claims posing for Playboy at her age is giving her girls a positive image. Then talk turns to nude pictures. Alex says it's ok she was the first. Jill frowns and says that Alex was spread-eagled in the hallway of her husband's hotel then rolls her head in disgust. Alex says, whatever, Red.

Andy wraps it up with a round-robin asking each Housewife if she's going to be on the show next season. Bethenny doesn’t know since her plate is so full but Ramona smiles and says she's just really getting into it so I guess it's a yes for her. Since Alex has found her voice she'll be there not season to use it. Sonja thinks she has a lot to share with the other women. And since she's the hostess with the mostess she’ll endure another season. LuAnn had fun and although she tried to stay out of the drama still managed to get sucked in so she also says she'll see. It's been a difficult time for Kelly since she’s not used to being around assertive, strong women like these so she's up in the air. Literally, I think. Jill doesn’t know, just doesn’t know. All she knows is that she hates Alex so she'll see as well.

It’s been 14 weeks of turmoil and craziness folks. Jill's teary as Bethenny says maybe they’ll have lunch and Jill says she wants to see the baby then she gets up to give Bethenny a hug and say how much she misses her. Let’s end it there.

SexyChattyCatty is a regular contributor at CrabbyGolightly.com where she writes on TV, America's favorite snack food.