As Betty drifts off to Cloud Nine, Don waits in the Man Lair, aka the maternity ward waiting room. It's here that he meets a prison guard and first-timer named Dennis Hobart, and they bond over a bottle of booze and some pilfered cigarettes from the busted machine in the corner. It's this kind of camaraderie that drives me to drink, because while the women are killing themselves to deliver babies, the men are just sitting there, hapless and clueless. I'm just saying I understand, respect and appreciate the entire Women's Movement, okay? At least now they have to be with you in the delivery room, so you can hurl obscenities (and maybe even a folding chair) at them while you suffer.

And speaking of women kicking ass and taking names, our favorite copywriting superhero Peggy Olsen is trying like hell to get a raise at the new and 90% more cutthroat Sterling Cooper. Every day, there's some ridiculous meeting about paper clip usage and other assorted methods of penny pinching, so Peggy is not very likely to see a raise.

Pete Campbell is still sweating bullets over his own position, since the Admiral people took a giant fucking dook all over his idea to sell their TV sets to black people, and the agency reprimanded him for his unthinkable act. I mean, who in the hell would suggest that black people respond to well-crafted advertising, buy goods and put their pants on one leg at a time like everyone else? The AUDACITY of you, Campbell, for only recognizing the color green.

So after all this, Duck's proposition to move both Pete and Peggy to rival agency Grey should have been a godsend, right? WRONG. Both kids, while strongly opposed to each other, are even more strongly opposed to the idea of a move. Well, at least at first. I mean, Peggy’s not making much to begin with, and a move could provide her with a raise…so she takes up the issue with Don, who pretty much confirms that SC won't ever give her what she wants. I'm dying to see what she decides. Maybe she'll become the female Don Draper at Grey?

Only time (and several more pilfered cigarettes and bottles of booze) will tell.

And it's time for my refill, people. I’m feeling quite parched.

Miz J, who works in advertising, is a regular contributor and resident expert on all things Mad Men at Crabby Golightly. Check out her blog at Miz J