SHOW ME THE MONEY

Tom Cruise Continues Buying Suri’s Love

By Elizabeth C.

TOM CRUISE CONTINUES HIS ALL-OUT WOOING TO BUY SURI’S LOVE.

Cruise keeps trying to one-up Katie Holmes as the two take dueling outings with their six-year-old daughter.

BAD, SAD, MAD

Love, Celebrity Style: Kristen Stewart, Katy Perry, Taylor Swift

By Elizabeth C.

KRISTEN STEWART’S HIDING OUT, KATY PERRY’S SCRAPING LOW AND TAYLOR SWIFT IS SUCKING UP. BAD GIRLS AND SAD GIRLS ARE TODAY’S SERVING OF CELEBRITY HASH. And when we say “sad,” we mean pathetic.

Let’s start with Kristen, the girl who stole a vampire’s heart. After being snapped in flagrante delicto, Stewart is rumored to be hiding out at her parents’ home in Woodland Hills, Calif.

IT’S ABOUT TIME

Credit: Planned Parenthood

Free Contraception: An Overdue Victory For Women’s Sexual Health — And Rights

By Elizabeth C.

WE TALKED A LITTLE BIT ABOUT LIVIN’ LA VIAGRA LOCA here on Monday, and I’m bringing it up again. Ever since that little blue pill hit the market in 1998, the dysfunctional boys on the bolus have been covered by their health insurance. That came compliment of their empathetic peers in industry who wouldn’t want to miss out on being rock hard in their waning years. Because if you’ve still got the juice to get a date, god forbid you lose out on the right to a hard-on.

WTF NEWS

Whack Wednesday: Welcome To “Chi-Raq,” A Salute To Bret’s Baby Mama & Suckin’ Face At Chick-fil-A

By Miz J

WITH COPS OUTNUMBERED BY GANG MEMBERS, 7-year-old kids getting gunned down in front of lemonade stands and hopeful college ballers getting killed while trying to keep some peace, Chicago’s become a literal warzone. As if the violence in Chicago this summer weren’t already bad enough, now cops have caught up with an 11-YEAR-OLD WITH A MOLOTOV COCKTAIL. Welcome to Chi-raq, folks.

BOB COSTAS INTERVIEW

Credit: AP

Winningest Olympian Michael Phelps: His Own Man

By Elizabeth C.

DID YOU SEE BOB COSTAS’ INTERVIEW WITH MICHAEL PHELPS AFTER BECOMING THE WINNINGEST OLYMPIAN EVER? Even after Phelps collected his 19th Olympic medal, Costas, ever the professional journalist, probed Phelps about being less than he was during the 2008 Beijing games. Specifically, he asked Phelps about coming in second in the 200-meter butterfly race by a hair.

“It’s hard to say that when you win a silver medal that something has gone wrong. But you’re standard is so high, I guess we can put it that way. What went wrong?” Costas asked Phelps Monday night.