A GRIM FAIRYTALE

Katy Perry Discards Love’s Fairytale In Wide Awake

By Elizabeth C.

LOVE’S ILLUSIONS STILL ALLURE IN KATY PERRY’S DARK FAIRYTALE video in which she sings her latest song, Wide Awake.

The cotton-candy-colored pop princess trades in her usual bright hues for foreboding black to deliver a wallop to her Prince Charming. Subtly isn’t Katy’s specialty, and once again she seems to share the lessons of her short-lived marriage to funnyman Russell Brand.

EVERYBODY WHO’S ANYBODY KNOWS HARRY

Real Housewives Of New York: Three Degrees Of Sexparation

By Trisha B.

WE GLIDE ALONG BETWEEN THE BRICK CANYONS OF NEW YORK CITY until we arrive at lunch with Carole Radziwill. Aviva arrives in leather shorts and black tights. Carole invited Ramona and LuAnn but they’re out of town. Sonja arrives next and as she burbles in her animated manner we see a woman stop and turn to stare at their table. It’s not every day you see a table of Housewives in New York City, amirite?

DIFFERENT STROKES

The Dirty Car Artist

By Elizabeth C.

JUST TRY TO KEEP A POKER FACE WHILE looking at Scott Wade’s dust-spawned illustrations: The “dirty car artist” recreates famous pop culture images from the dusty debris on dirty car windows. Here he pays homage to C. M. Coolidge’s 16-painting series entitled, Dogs Playing Poker.

DELUSION ISN’T PRETTY

Still Selling Crazy: Rielle Hunter’s What Really Happened

By Elizabeth C.

ABC NEWS IS PROMOTING RIELLE HUNTER’S NEW BOOK, What Really Happened, in a 20/20 interview to air Friday. And in excerpts published today, Hunter sounds shockingly remorseless about the role she played in John Edward’s political and personal downfall. There is not a hint of self-reflection; not a whiff of self-blame.

Instead, she continues her assault on the now-deceased Elizabeth Edwards, calling her a “witch on wheels,” and blathers on in language that sounds suspiciously like Oprah-speak.

LIVING LARGE ON BORROWED TIME

The Real Housewives Of New Jersey: Déclassé Act

By Karen Malmquist

THE TABLES HAVE COMPLETELY TURNED ON TERESA GIUDICE, although she doesn’t seem to know why. On Sunday’s Real Housewives of New Jersey, Teresa sits down with Jacqueline and Teresa to have the friendship-ending blowout viewers have bracing themselves for since the season three reunion.

But first, despite all of their highly-publicized financial woes, the Giudices are busy expanding their already extravagant property. Joe Giudice is doing construction around the house, making more garages and stuff. Teresa says in her interview that just because they declared bankruptcy, it doesn’t mean you “crawl into a hole and die.”

AWESOME

Caution: Slippery When Wet — And It’s Always Wet

By Elizabeth C.

I‘M BACK AFTER A WEEKLONG HIAITUS to take care of some happy family business. My routine was completely tossed out the window, so I’m starting back slowly, returning to the treacherous path of blogging by way of the slippery Atlanterhavsveien Road — aka “The Atlantic Road” in Norway.

ONE STEP FORWARD, TWO STEPS BACK

The Pauly D Project: Committing To Banging The Same Chick For A Lifetime

By Karen Malmquist

AS THE PAULY D PROJECT SEASON DRAWS CLOSED, Biggie arrives at the biggest moment of his life, and Pauly goes back to high school.

GET YOUR HOUSE IN ORDER

Real Housewives Of Orange County: Eddie Gets ‘Yes!,’ Slade An Ultimatum

By Trisha B.

THERE’S VERY LITTLE OF THE NEW BESTIES VICKI AND ALEXIS THIS WEEK. Tamra’s pining for an engagement ring from Eddie while Gretchen, after seeing a text message from a jeweler, freaks and takes the Smiley outta Slade.

POST-IT NOTES

Whack: First Lady Goes ‘Pin-Up,’ Apple Was Tacky, Waffle House Still Is

By Miz J

IT’S OFFICIAL: Michelle Obama is now on Pinterest. Now you can drool over her killer ensembles, thumb through her way-better-than-yours holiday photo albums and maybe learn a little more about Mr. Prez and his family.

S.O.S. (SAME OLD SLOBS)

A Broad, A Brawl & A Snooki Whodunit: Jersey Shore Is Back

By Karen Malmquist

IT’S BARELY HUMP DAY AND IT’S already has been rough week for the Jersey Shore cast. The gang was in a bar brawl down in Seaside, which Shore cameras conveniently captured, Snooki’s “alleged” nude pictures hit the web, and Deena was arrested for dancing drunk in traffic.